


Symphony

by ClexaGriffin



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, F/F, Falling In Love, G!p Lexa, High School, Lust, Sex, Sexual Content, Student Lexa, Teacher Clarke, Teacher-Student Relationship, popular lexa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-12
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2018-10-30 23:27:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 89,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10887120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClexaGriffin/pseuds/ClexaGriffin
Summary: Every single Wednesday in the evening, the popular student Lexa Woods goes to music class because her mom makes her. She hates it. But that all changes when her old, boring teacher gets replaced for a certain other teacher.





	1. Chapter 1

 

**Chapter 1**

"Good job, Woods." Lexa heard her coach Pike say.

Lexa nodded and smiled. She was too tired to say anything and really sweaty, too. She walked to the changing room where Anya was, her best friend who was also in her baseball team.

"I have no idea why you’re the team’s captain. We always lose." Anya said sarcastically when she saw Lexa.

Lexa snorted as she changed from baseball outfit to her normal clothes. She packed her stuff because she didn’t want to shower here with all the other girls. It’s not that she was ashamed she had something else going on there, not at all. But she always felt so watched by others when she would shower at school and she didn’t feel like being watched.

Anya put on her clothes as well after showering there and waited for Lexa.

"You’re coming to the party this weekend, right?"

Every time Lexa and her team won, they would throw a big party with the whole team and more. They won almost every time which was just a way of throwing more parties every time.

"Yeah, of course."

Anya smiled. "It’s not really a party without Lexa Woods."

Lexa laughed and pulled out her phone from her bag. Hundred texts appeared, congratulating Lexa and the team on winning the game just now.

"You coming over later as well?" Anya asked while they walked out of the school.

Lexa clicked her tongue and put her phone away again. "Can’t. I’ve got music class."

"You’re still really going to that stuff? What is wrong with you?" Anya blurted out.

Lexa let out a sigh. "Yeah, ask my mom. Apparently she wants me to be one of those kids who gives a good example for the rest of the kids. But let me tell you that that class is one of the reasons I drink so much." Lexa scoffed.

Anya let out a laugh. "You should tell your mom that." Anya insisted.

Lexa laughed and shook her head.

"Oh well, that good example has already sailed anyway." Anya continued. Lexa looked at her and grinned.

"It’s not that bad." Lexa protested.

"Oh really? Raven, how about you remind Lexa of all the things she’s done lately?"

Lexa turned around and met with Raven’s eyes who just walked towards them. "Well, are we talking about all the parties she’s been going to without permission or fucking almost every girl at those parties?"

Anya laughed and Lexa rolled her eyes again.

"You’re exaggerating." Lexa said.

"We all know I’m not, but we also know it’s your favorite day of the week, Woods." She said.

Lexa rolled her eyes again with a scoff and continued walking towards her car.

Anya and Raven stood still and watched her leave.

"Come hang out with us later. Skip your class." Raven yelled.

Lexa turned around and shrugged. She really wanted to skip her class. "I’ll see what I can do."

"Can I convince you if I throw a party with many girls?" Raven continued but Lexa only smiled in herself and kept walking silently. That might have been great motivation indeed for her to skip class.  She heard Anya laugh hysterically behind her.

A little while later she got home. Before entering the house she looked at herself in the mirror. Maybe if she rubbed her cheeks and forehead intensely enough her mom would think she had a fever. Also, she was still a little sweaty and hot from the game.

She entered the house and met with her mom who was reading at the moment, Indra. Who was really her aunt and not her mom, but that’s a long story.

"Mom?" Lexa pulled out her best sick face and her creaky voice.

Indra sighed. "You’re not skipping class." She said without looking up from the book she was reading.

"But I’m not feeling well. Here, feel my cheeks." She continued pretending feeling miserable.

Indra let out a sigh.

"This isn’t the first time you’ve tried this. Come on, go shower and leave."

Lexa let out the deepest, annoyed sigh and walked upstairs to go shower. There was no use trying to convince her mom.

"See you in two hours." Her mom called when Lexa closed the door a little too rough.

She drove her car to class and parked it there.

She had skipped this class before, but when her mom found out about that, she got grounded for six months. It was terrible. She couldn’t see her friends besides at school, she couldn’t go anywhere besides music class and her normal classes at school. She couldn’t even play in the baseball team. Again, it was terrible. But that had been a year ago. Right now she was just going to class but not anticipating at all with anything. Like the usual. The other students were not her friends. They were all dumb and weird in Lexa’s opinion. She couldn’t understand why making music was such a big deal to them. It was just music.

Lexa entered the class and sat down where she always did: behind everyone else so she could be left alone. Everyone followed her with their eyes like they were either scared or fascinated by her. She wasn’t quite sure. She spread her legs and sunk into her chair with her hood on, waiting for her boring, old teacher to arrive like every other week. She closed her eyes and thought about her friends having fun without her. It sucked.

Closing her eyes she heard some heels making the sound of like an elegant walk. She heard the sound coming closer and then it stopped right in front of her. Annoyed Lexa opened her eyes and they immediately widened by seeing someone else than her regular teacher. The woman in front of her cleared her throat and all Lexa did was stare at her. Lexa’s eyes were drawn to her lips when she spoke.

"Could you sit up straight?" She heard her say in the softest yet strictest voice she’d ever heard.

But Lexa was way too fascinated by her bright blue eyes and the way her blonde hair fell over her shoulder. She didn’t move for a moment. She was just admiring the woman in front of her in shock.

The woman raised her eyebrows impatiently. "I could also not ask you nicely." She continued.

Lexa gained a little strength back in her muscles and slowly sat up straight. She earned a smile from the blonde and Lexa thought her smile could seriously cure every bad thing in the world.

"Good." The blonde said and walked to the front of the class and Lexa couldn’t do anything else than keep staring at the woman. Those high waisted skinny jeans were definitely a part of the staring problem.

The woman cleared her throat and then spoke loud and clear with a little bit of a raspy voice.

"Hi, class. My name is Clarke Griffin, but you’re only allowed to call me miss Griffin. From now on I’m taking over this class, because miss Adams’s sick at home with a burn out. Before we start I want you to respect my rules. That means no talking when I’m talking, no doing other things then making music here and no caps or hoodies." She looked and pointed at Lexa which made everyone turn around and look at her.

Lexa’s heart was pounding fast when the teacher pointed at her, but sighed and pulled off her hood that revealed her curly long and still a bit wet hair.

Miss Griffin smiled again and clapped her hands once. "Good, let’s start shall we?"

Lexa spend almost the whole class staring at her new teacher. She couldn’t help it. Her eyes were glued to her all the time. The way her blouse was settled into her high waisted jeans, the high heels she was wearing and how she managed to walk so well on them. Lexa was fascinated by every move she made.

Lexa shook her head. She couldn’t think that of her teacher. Right?  

"So, you play the piano?"The teacher suddenly came to sit next to Lexa on the same stool.

Lexa was sitting behind a piano and tried to remain her cool before answering, but she felt herself getting nervous at the sudden contact from miss Griffin’s leg against hers.

"Not really."

The teacher nodded. "You’re here to learn how to play." She corrected herself.

Lexa scoffed and shook her head. "Look, normally the teacher just leaves me alone because I don’t want to be here. Just let me sit out those 2 hours and make everybody happy."

Miss Griffin raised her eyebrows and started laughing. "Why don’t you just go home then?"

Lexa felt her stomach twist because she didn’t really know what to tell her new teacher. Her other teacher knew about it but maybe the truth would sound stupid to her new teacher.

"Because my mom wants me to do this." Lexa said honestly.

Miss Griffin nodded understandably and let out a sigh. Lexa looked at her but she didn’t look back at her. Still Lexa enjoyed watching the teacher from up close.

"Alright well, let me at least hear what you’ve got." She said and pointed her head towards the piano.

Lexa laughed and started playing the piano. Not really though, ‘cause she couldn’t play anything.

Miss Griffin stopped her by placing her hand on Lexa’s arm and Lexa froze at the contact.

"You weren’t lying when you said you couldn’t play." Miss Griffin sighed.

Lexa shrugged to play it cool.

Miss Griffin stood up. "I want to see you after class." She demanded and Lexa got a little too excited about the thought of being alone in this room with her new hot teacher, but she just nodded.

Miss Griffin walked to another student that was playing the cello and sat down next to him as well. Lexa smiled internally and then went to sit on a chair with her hood on again, waiting for this class to finally be over.

After two hours and ten whole minutes they finally got excused from the class. Lexa waited patiently after everyone left just like the teacher asked her. When finally everyone left (which took a while because other’s asked the teacher stuff about their nerdy music after class), the room suddenly seemed way too big.

Miss Griffin walked towards Lexa to increase the distance between them and sat down on the chair next to her. Lexa followed every step she took but tried not to be obvious about it. There was just something about the way she walked.

The blonde crossed her legs and looked at Lexa like she was concerned about something.

"For how long have you been going to this class?"

Lexa sighed. ‘’For too long.’’

"A year?"

Lexa shook her head. "Make that four."

The teacher’s eyes widened out of shock. "What are you still doing here?"

"I told you, my mom wants me to. But next year I’ll be off to college and so I’ll be gone which means no music class for me anymore."

The woman next to her nodded and looked away from her.

"Is there something I can do for you till then?" She asked softly and Lexa’s ears melted at the soft voice.

"I don’t think so." She shrugged.

Miss Griffin squeezed her eyes and then stood up.

"Have you ever tried playing anything else then the piano?"

Lexa shook her head.

"Come here." She said and pointed to the drum right next to her where she was standing.

Lexa stood up and sat down before the drums.

Miss Griffin gave her two drumsticks and stood behind Lexa, leaning down a little so she could rest her arms Lexa's stool.

"Maybe you were handed the wrong instrument." Miss Griffin softly said close to her and that made Lexa nervous again.

Still, Lexa didn’t feel like putting her energy into music. She wanted to put her energy into her baseball at school, what she was good at.

Lexa stood up and handed the drumsticks back to the teacher. She noticed the slight height difference between them. Lexa just a bit taller even though the teacher had heels on.

"I’m good." Lexa said and the blonde raised her eyebrows.

"I’m not if you’re here every week with the same attitude."

Lexa let out a laugh and shook her head in disbelief. "At least I’m here."

The teacher smiled wide and shook her head as well. "I’m not done with you yet. But for now, I am." The teacher turned around and Lexa watched her as she packed her stuff.

They both walked outside to their cars and when Lexa wanted to say something, the teacher started talking.

"Sorry, I don’t think I caught your name earlier." Miss Griffin said.

"Lexa Woods."

The teacher smiled. "I’ll see you again next week, miss Woods." She said a little emotionless and Lexa smiled at the choice of name.

"See ya." Lexa said dumbly and watched as she walked away from her again.


	2. Chapter 2

Finally the weekend was here. Lexa was getting ready to go to the party at Echo’s house, another baseball player in her team. Lexa saw her as the biggest competition because she was always trying to make Lexa fail on purpose. But until now, it didn’t work out for Echo so well.

Lexa got into the shower and put on some pants and the best sweater she had in her closet.

She walked downstairs and met with Indra.

"Where was this party again?" She asked.

"At Echo’s."

"And where is that?"

Lexa let out a sigh. "Nearby. Like 10 minutes away."

"And you’re driving the car?"

"No mom, not me. Anya’s picking me up in a few minutes."

"Does that mean you’re going to drink alcohol?"

"Oh my god, just leave me be." Lexa said irritated. The answer was absolutely yes by the way.

"You’d better not be drinking."

Normally Indra wasn’t at home with these kind of parties. She was working the night shift. But not today.

A car honked outside and Lexa was glad to be saved from this conversation.

"That’s Anya. Don’t wait up for me, okay?"

Indra laughed. "What do you mean don’t wait up? You have a curfew."

Lexa widened her eyes. "You’re kidding."

"You just turned eighteen. I want you home before midnight."

"Fine." Lexa said annoyed and put on her jacket. She heard the car honk again and left her house.

Indra and Lexa had never had such a great relationship with each other. Mainly because Indra was too overprotecting in Lexa’s opinion and she was known for breaking the rules once in a while. Lexa was not the perfect daughter in Indra’s mind either. Not after she lost herself losing her parents in an accident. That’s when Indra became Lexa’s guardian.

Lexa smoothly walked to her friends in the car and got greeted by Anya and Raven who were way too excited. Raven probably had been drinking already. Anya was driving this time which meant Lexa and Raven could drink as much as they wanted. Maybe she would chill down a little tonight after her conversation with her mom, but she couldn’t make any promises.

When they arrived at the party, they were immediately greeted by everyone and Lexa’s eye went to Echo who looked almost filthy at them. Lexa nodded once to her to make sure she saw her.

Raven immediately dragged Lexa to the drinking table. "You want a beer?" She yelled because the music was too loud.

Lexa nodded and smiled when her eye got caught by a familiar face in the corner. The girl was already looking at her. Lexa took a sip from her beer and made eye contact. It was her ex, Costia. She wasn’t in the baseball team but she was a popular girl at school as well and so she got invited pretty often to these parties. Normally Lexa didn’t want to do anything with her, but she had to admit she looked really good in her tight black dress. But not as good as miss Griffin would probably look in that dress. Lexa shook away her thoughts.

Raven pulled Lexa away again and Costia seemed to look disappointed but didn’t do anything else than stay right where she was.

Lexa, Raven and Anya talked a bit with others of the team and Lexa was a few beers in. She looked around and immediately made eye contact with Costia again. Costia walked right passed her on purpose and made Lexa follow her like a bee did with a flower.

She followed Costia as she entered the bathroom and she let the door open on purpose. Lexa entered after her and closed the door. The room was pretty small.

"What are you doing?" Costia asked.

Lexa gave her a smug smile.

"What you want me to do."

Costia rolled her eyes. "I saw you looking at me."

Lexa took a step closer and put a hand on her waist. "Yeah? Was it that obvious?"

Costia smiled and kissed Lexa roughly. They kissed open mouthed and Costia immediately reached for Lexa’s belt to undo. Lexa felt herself grow harder the more Costia touched her in that area.

Then they heard someone aggressively knock on the door. They stopped for a moment when they heard yelling.

"Lexa, I swear to god if you’re in there with my cousin I will kill you." It was definitely Echo.

Lexa looked at Costia with wide eyes. "You’re Echo’s cousin?"

Costia pushed Lexa hard. "Of course not." She whispered angrily.

"Lexa, open the door."

Lexa let out an annoyed sigh and pulled her belt back on. She tried to cover herself up and luckily she wasn’t on full length yet. She opened the door and Echo almost stormed in before she noticed her cousin wasn’t with her.

"Relax, dude." Lexa said and walked over to her friends again, leaving Costia behind. She looked at the time on her phone and noticed it was almost midnight. Lexa let out another sigh and grabbed Anya away from her conversation.

"I have to go home."

"Why? What happened?"

Lexa shook her head. "Nothing. I just have a curfew for tonight."

Anya burst out into laughter. "Oh you’re serious? Alright I’ll take you."

They left without Raven because Anya was going back after dropping Lexa off at home.

She dropped Lexa off and Lexa slowly walked home. She was already late anyway.

She opened the door and her mom was waiting for her on the couch. She looked furious when she saw Lexa walking in.

"Hey." Lexa said.

"You’re late."

"Just a few minutes."

"Half an hour." Indra said.

"Well, at least I’m here. Goodnight." She tried not to show she had been drinking a little and went upstairs. Lexa immediately fell asleep.

 

\----

 

It was already Wednesday again and Lexa didn’t know if she was a little excited to go or not. She was at least excited to see miss Griffin again, that was for sure. She had found herself thinking about her a lot more than she would like to admit.

After the party the next day Lexa got grounded again by not showing up on time. She couldn’t go to her friends or any parties again for two weeks. It was only two weeks, but Lexa was still annoyed by it.

Lexa changed into some other clothes and put on some deodorant. She wanted to smell good in case the teacher would come to sit close to her again.

She wished her mom goodbye and drove off to class.

This time Lexa was a bit early but so was miss Griffin. Lexa walked up to her as she was the only student to have arrived. She stopped in front of her as the blonde was sitting behind her desk, writing something.

"Evening." Lexa greeted politely.

The teacher looked up and smiled. "Good evening, Lexa Woods."

Lexa smiled dumbly because she still remembered her name.

"Take a seat. Class will start in ten minutes."

Lexa nodded and did as she was told. This time she went to sit at the front row instead of behind everyone else.

Miss Griffin noticed and frowned. "No hoodie?" She asked playfully.

Lexa smiled again. "Specially for you." Lexa realized how stupid she sounded. Specially for you? Where did that come from? But the teacher didn’t seem to mind.

"You’re making progress already." Miss Griffin stood up. Lexa could now see she was wearing a tight red skirt just a little over her knee. She had her white blouse settled in it just like last week which showed a little bit of her cleavage and she was wearing some heels.

Lexa swallowed loudly her nerves away. If miss Griffin was going to look better every week, it wouldn’t be easy for Lexa to stop staring at her.

She came to sit on the chair right next to Lexa. She seemed to do that more often. Not that Lexa minded.

"So you want to try another instrument?"

Lexa’s smile disappeared. "I didn’t say that."

Miss Griffin nodded. "I thought about you this week and I’ve got something fun today for you."

"For me?" Lexa screamed internally. Clarke Griffin thought of her this week?

The teacher smiled. "Yes. Well, for all of you."

Lexa gave her a grin. "What is it?"

"You’ll see." She almost whispered and Lexa stared at her lips as the words escaped her mouth.

The first student already arrived and soon enough the rest did too. Miss Griffin waited leaning on her desk until everybody sat down.

"Alright. Before we start I want to do something else with you." The teacher started.

Lexa swallowed impatiently.

"For you who don’t know: I graduated at the academy of music and dance. I know some of you want to be inspired because we don’t all feel like playing an instrument for two hours long." She quickly exchanged looks with Lexa. "So I thought, why not dance a bit on some music?"

Lexa hoped she was kidding. But seeing how happy she looked while saying it, Lexa was afraid she wasn’t.

"Lexa, I would like to invite you to dance with me. The rest should pair up as well."

Lexa’s heart was pounding like crazy. Miss Griffin wanted to dance with her. Lexa was afraid she would do something stupid in her teacher’s presence. She always danced alone or didn’t dance at all.

Miss Griffin held out her hand for Lexa and she didn’t wait any longer than to grab it gently. The teacher’s hands were cold, but Lexa didn’t mind.

Miss Griffin was still holding Lexa’s hand as she started to explain what simple dance routine they were about to do. She put on some slow music and turned to Lexa.

Miss Griffin placed Lexa’s hand on her waist and Lexa thought she would have a heart attack at the sudden contact. The teacher put her hand on Lexa’s arm and she intertwined their fingers from their other hands.

They were apparently too far away from each other and miss Griffin took a step forward.

"I won’t bite." She promised.

Lexa could see the small mole on the teacher upper lip and she felt her palms getting a little sweaty. Lexa never had such sweaty palms. She locked eyes with the teacher who was just a few inches away from her.

They slowly started dancing on the slow music’s rhythm. Two steps forward, two steps backward. Not the most difficult thing to do, but Lexa still looked down at her feet in case she would step on the teacher’s foot.

The blonde let go of Lexa’s hand and pulled Lexa’s chin up with her finger.

"Don’t look at your feet."

Lexa swallowed hard and nodded and intertwined their fingers again. She looked at the way the blonde moved her hips and it was incredibly hot.

"Are you nervous? Or did you just wash your hands?" Miss Griffin joked.

Lexa could feel her heart pounding in her chest. Those damn palms. "I’m sorry. I’m not usually like this."

The teacher laughed. "Don’t worry about it. It’s cute."

Lexa gave her a grin before the teacher broke their contact and stopped the music.

"Alright, let’s learn another easy move and switch partners."

Everyone protested. Even Lexa. But just internally.

Lexa got paired up with another girl which she didn’t even know the name of. Lexa listened carefully to miss Griffin’s explanation and got jealous at the guy holding the teacher the same way Lexa had a second ago. Lexa sighed and performed awkwardly with the other girl who was also awkwardly keeping her distance from Lexa.

Lexa kept staring at the teacher and the guy and Lexa sighed at the way he wanted to impress her.

"Ow." Lexa’s dance partner said.

Lexa looked down at their feet and noticed she stepped on her.

"Sorry."

The girl let out a sigh.

They kept dancing for another five minutes, Lexa's eyes wandering over to the teacher once in a while.

"Alright, one last time class. Let me see what you got. Let’s switch partners again. Choose."

Lexa didn’t know how fast to let go of the girl and walk towards the teacher. The teacher didn’t seem to notice everyone had already paired up except for Lexa.

"Ah. We meet again." The teacher said in a rusty voice and smiled.

Lexa smiled and held out her hand. "My palms won’t sweaty this time. I promise."

The teacher laughed and laid her hand into Lexa’s and intertwined their fingers once again. They took the same position as earlier and Lexa was enjoying the contact of their skin with her teacher.

They started dancing and Lexa tried her very best not to look at the floor. She didn’t want to. She focused on the blonde’s dreamy eyes.

"Look at you. You’re getting better already." The teacher chuckled.

Lexa felt a little proud and smiled wide. They kept dancing for a short five minutes again and Lexa kept looking at the teacher's eyes, trying her best not to step on her feet. Her palms weren't as sweaty as before and Lexa was actually improving her moves. 

"Alright." The teacher let Lexa go and stopped the music. "That was my little bit of inspiration from me for you. You can grab your instruments now."

The whole class felt relieved except for Lexa. She walked up to miss Griffin and raised her eyebrows when she saw Lexa coming closer.

"Hey." She said awkwardly.

"Lexa. What did you think of my little suprise?"

Lexa let out a shy laugh. "I mean, you’re pretty good at dancing.’’

Miss Griffin smiled wide. ‘’You’re not so bad yourself.’’

Lexa smiled. "I was just wondering what I should do now. I mean, I don’t mind sitting here for the rest of this hour."

Miss Griffin nodded. "What do you want to do?"

Lexa shrugged.

"I will come back in a few minutes. Just enjoy yourself till them. I got to go help the others."

Lexa nodded and waited patiently. But the class was almost over when the teacher returned to her.

"I’m sorry, that’s not what I meant when I said a few minutes."

"It’s okay."

"No, it’s not. I don’t want to make you think you don’t matter to me as a student because you don’t want to be here."

Lexa smiled. "I don’t think that."

"So, you still refuse to play an instrument?"

Lexa nodded. "However, I wouldn’t mind some dancing again."

Miss Griffin smiled. "We’ll do it again next time in class."

Lexa nodded. "How about we do it after today's class? To make up for staying away ‘a few minutes’?" Lexa tried politely.

The teacher burst out into laughter. "I have somewhere to get to today so I can’t stay after class. I’m sorry. But how about this: You just come a little bit earlier next week and I’ll teach you some other dance skills."

Lexa wondered why she had to leave earlier today and immediately thought about a date or something. But then again she was happy she invited her to come over earlier next week.

"Sounds like a plan." Lexa smiled.

The teacher nodded and looked at her watch.

"I’m going to wrap this up and leave."

Lexa sat down again and watched the teacher do her word. Everyone left after they got excused and Lexa waited for the teacher to pack in her stuff and they left together outside.

"You know you don’t have to wait for me, right?" The teacher stopped walking before turning the other way.

Lexa nodded. "I figured you’d want some company."

The teacher smiled. "Yes, those eight steps to my car are definitely lonely."

Lexa smiled.

"I’ll see you next week for our dance class." The teacher said and walked away.

Lexa didn’t say anything this time in case she would sound a little too excited. But she definitely was excited.


	3. Chapter 3

“Why is your mom so strict? You can’t tame a beast. Grounding you is no use.” Anya said while running around the field.

Lexa laughed and kept on running. “She’s not being reasonable. I’m not that bad.”

Anya scoffed. “Okay I just realized she’s being way too reasonable with you.” She laughed and Lexa laughed too.

“Focus, ladies.” Coach Pike yelled at them.

Lexa then made a last sprint and finished first.

“Nice.” Anya high fived her after finishing second.

“So did Costia and you do something at the party? I saw you coming out of the bathroom together.” Anya asked out of breath.

Lexa shook her head. “Nothing. Just made out.” She was catching her breath as well.

Anya started laughing. “You ‘just’ made out. Sure, ‘cause that’s normal doing with your ex.”

Lexa shrugged and smiled.

“I can’t believe you didn’t get laid though. That must be a first.”

Lexa slightly punched her arm.

“Not a first.”

“Not a first” Anya imitated her jokingly.

They both laughed and Lexa prepared herself for the next exercise so she could explain and show the rest of her team while they all followed her.

 

\----

 

After practice coach Pike came to Lexa before she entered the locker-room.

“Miss Woods, we need to talk. Come by my office after you changed yourself.”

Lexa nodded and entered the room. Lexa didn’t really know what this was about so she changed herself into some regular clothes. She told Anya she shouldn’t wait for her because she didn’t know for how long she was going to stay there.

Lexa walked to Pike’s office at school and knocked on the door and opened it.

Coach Pike was already waiting for her behind his desk.

“Please sit.” He demanded.

Lexa did as she was told and made herself comfortable.

He sighed. “You probably know what this is about.”

Lexa shook her head.

“You’re failing two classes.”

Lexa nodded and shrugged. “I do know about that.”

“Lexa, you can’t fail any class when you’re the baseball’s team star. That’s not news to you.’’

“Well, yeah, but I have to keep this up for just a few more months until I graduate. I can keep up my grades.”

Her coach shook his head. “You have to get your grades up this next month or you’ll be out of the team.’’ Her coach frowned. “I was informed you’re in theater class this year but you’re failing it miserably. You know that’s not your thing, theatre class.”

He sighed. “You know, it’s not too late to switch creative class. I know it’s mandatory, but you could switch to another creative class like drawing or music or sewing.”

Lexa’s eyes widened. “That’s not my thing either.”

Her coach nodded. “Well, I’m giving you this opportunity to switch because I don’t want to lose you. You’re my best player. So, take it. Let me know this week because I want those grades up. Biology as well.”

“Can I switch biology as well?”

Coach Pike laughed. “No. That’s mandatory.”

Lexa sighed and stood up. She gave her coach an informal handshake and left.

She had a lot to think about. She didn’t want to take any of those classes. She would take music class if she knew she could play an instrument.

She guessed all those classes had been for nothing after all.

 

**\----**

 

“Mom, I swear. It’s for extra practice.”

“Do you really expect me to believe you after all your lies?”

Lexa let out the most annoyed sighed ever. She sat down next to her mom.

“Where do you expect me to go half an hour earlier?”

“Everywhere except music class.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and laid down on the couch.

“Great. Thanks for grounding me.” She mumbled.

“You know I hate it when you mumble.”

Lexa stood up angrily and went upstairs. She was so done with this overprotecting bullshit.

Now she couldn’t let miss Griffin know she would be late for their appointment. Maybe if she would have her number…

Lexa sighed and let herself fall on the bed until twenty minutes before class. Lexa would probably arrive ten minutes earlier again, but they wouldn’t have much alone time for dancing.

She stood up again and hurried to the car without saying goodbye to Indra. She got there as fast as she couldn’t find her teacher anywhere. Lexa got a little nervous. Was she angry at her for not showing up and maybe that’s why she left?

Lexa sat down in the first row again, just like last week. She looked around her. She did see miss Griffin’s bag next to her desk. She was here somewhere.

Lexa waited impatiently before standing up and walk around the building. Just when she walked through the door into the hallway, miss Griffin was already on her way. Lexa smiled when she saw her but when the teacher saw Lexa and looked at her, she could see she had been crying. The teacher widened her eyes when she saw Lexa and then greeted her, walking into the classroom again.

Lexa was shocked. Did she make her cry? For not showing up?

“Evening.” Was all the teacher said.

Lexa walked to her teacher while she watched her sat down behind her desk.

“I’m sorry for not showing up. I was grounded.” Lexa immediately said.

She would never forgive herself if she had made the teacher cry.

Miss Griffin shook her head.

“It’s okay. It wasn’t such a good timing for me after all.”

Lexa leaned a little on the desk, her hands in the pockets of her vest.

“Are you okay?” Lexa asked softly.

The teacher looked up at her with red eyes and shook her head, but then nodded.

“I’m okay.”

Lexa scoffed. “You don’t look okay.”

The teacher shook her head.

“Well thanks. You sure know how to make someone feel better.”

Lexa’s stomach got filled with a sudden guilt. She didn’t mean it like that.

“That’s not what I meant. You always look okay. I mean, not right now. I mean, you look like you’ve been crying is what I mean. That’s not okay.” She rambled.

The teacher smiled a tiny bit and sighed. “Crap. Is it that obvious?”

So Lexa was right after all. She wasn’t okay.

“Kinda.” Lexa felt bad for the teacher. She sure looked like she could use a hug. But Lexa kept her distance.

“You want to talk about it?” Lexa asked quiet and softly.

The teacher smiled and shook her head.

“It’s not something I should tell my student.”

Lexa locked their eyes. She was a little disappointed. But that didn’t stop her.

“It’s not 7 pm yet so theoretically I’m not your student yet. You can tell me.” Lexa smiled a little.

The teacher smiled a bit too and nodded. She waited a minute before answering.  

“Okay but only because I really need to tell someone right now.” She sighed.

“My three year relationship just ended.” She quickly said and Lexa could see she tried to pull herself back together. Lexa didn’t even know she was in a relationship. She wasn’t shocked though that she was. Someone as miss Griffin could probably get anyone she wanted.

“I’m sorry. That sucks.”

The teacher nodded and sighed before falling back into complete silence. Lexa didn’t really know what else to say. She didn’t want to make her cry so she remained silent.

Miss Griffin started laughing in disbelief. “You want to know what the reason was?”

Before Lexa could answer her, she already spoke.

“She said we were too far away from each other. Can you believe that?”

She sounded angry but all Lexa really heard was the word ‘she’.

“We made perfectly clear that we wanted to wait for each other because I’m not permanently going to stay here. But she couldn’t wait a few months I guess. The distance was too far away between LA and Portland.”

She.

Lexa shook her head in disbelief.

“So, she broke up with you?”

The teacher nodded.

“A few minutes before you arrived she called me.”

Lexa shook her head again.

“Well. Her loss, right?”

The teacher let out a deep sigh.

“I should think like that, shouldn’t I?”

Lexa felt bad for her because she almost started crying again.

“Why don’t you just call in sick here for today? I could take you somewhere, you shouldn’t be driving right now.”

The teacher smiled and gave her a thankful nod.

“I wish I could. But all your classmates are probably on their way and besides, I need some distraction. I don’t want to be alone right now.”

Lexa nodded in understanding.

“You shouldn’t be alone right now.”

The teacher nodded.

“And yet, I still am.” She sighed. “I’m sorry, you shouldn’t see me like this.”

“There’s nobody you know around here?”

The teacher shook her head. “Besides my parents, nobody.”

Lexa nodded understandably. She wanted to do something. She felt a little hopeless right now.

The teacher stood up and grabbed a tissue out of her bag. Lexa admired her in her tight jeans again, but she couldn’t think about that right now.

Lexa slowly walked up to the teacher. “Correct me if I’m wrong but I think you need a hug.” Lexa widened her arms and the teacher laughed a little. At first she kept her distance, but then carefully let herself being wrapped up in the arms of the taller student.

Lexa put her muscly arms around her and felt the teacher rest her head on her shoulder. Miss Griffin fitted perfectly in her arms and Lexa felt bad for her. But it did mean she was at least into girls. Lexa didn’t know why she thought she would ever have a chance with the older woman, but there was just something about her Lexa couldn’t let go off.

The teacher let go after a short ten seconds and nodded thankfully. She let out a sigh.

“Thanks. I’m sorry I’m charging you with all of this. I shouldn’t do that. You’re my student.”

Lexa rolled her eyes hard at the word ‘student’.

“Still not 7 pm. But you’re not charging me with it either. We’ve all been through bad break ups.”

The teacher nodded.

“You too? How old are you?” She frowned.

“Eighteen. And yes, me too. I regularly see her at school and at parties. We sometimes end up together though. But nothing serious, you know?”

Lexa immediately regretted telling that last part. The teacher couldn’t think she was a philanderer or something. Which she clearly wasn’t in her own opinion.

The teacher nodded.

“Guess we both lost our girl then. The only difference between you and me is that I’m probably never going to see Niylah again.”

“Niylah? Was that her name?”

The teacher nodded sadly.

“You going to be okay. I promise.”

Lexa took a step closer and was ready for a second hug, but the teacher nodded again and sat down behind her desk again, keeping distance from her student.

“So, we’re not dancing today?” Lexa tried changing the conversation.

“I’m sorry. I’m not really in the mood.”

Lexa nodded in understanding.

“You want me to drive you home later?” She tried again.

The teacher put down her pen on the desk and intertwined her own fingers.

“Lexa, it’s better if you don’t. You’re in my class. It looks weird. Besides, I can drive home myself.”

Lexa nodded a little. This class was a curse and a blessing all in one.

“Just trying to help.” Lexa said and sat down on her own chair again.

“I know, but you shouldn’t have to. I’ll be fine.”

Lexa nodded and not five seconds later the first student came in.

 

\----

 

Miss Griffin had kept her distance from Lexa for two hours long. They spoke only once which was like one sentence each. Lexa understood the teacher wanted some distance and alone time, but she already told Lexa about her situation, and she was not going to let it slip like that. Especially if miss Griffin didn’t have anybody else she knew around here.

“Okay, I’ll see you guys next week. Don’t forget to take a look at music camp.”

Everyone stood up and left except for Lexa. She stayed where she was.

The teacher noticed and let out a sigh.

“What do I have to do to make you leave like the rest?” She didn’t mean it in a mean way, but it did sound like that.

Lexa stood up and understood.

“Nothing. I was just leaving.” Lexa gave her a soft smirk.

“I’ll see you next week. And good luck with your situation.” Lexa said and left the building. If the teacher wasn’t happy having Lexa around like this, she had to leave before she would find her annoying.

The teacher didn’t say anything at all and watched her leave.

Lexa understood the teacher’s situation and she didn’t want to make it worse. That was the only reason she left her alone.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It really is a slow burn, isn't it?

A week had passed and Lexa had decided to not let her coach know about a decision about creative class. But the next time she had theatre class the teacher send her away because apparently she wasn’t on the list anymore.

She went over to Coach Pike’s office angrily. She assumed this was his work.

“What did you do?” She interrupted him on the phone but she didn’t care.

“I’ll call you back.” He said through the phone and hang up.

“Good morning, miss Woods.”

“No, don’t good morning me. How do you expect me to get my grades up if you erased my name on the list from theatre class?”

Pike let out a scoff. “You’re smart thinking it was my work. You could get your grades up easily.” He laughed. “Yes, it was me. I informed your mother about your situation because it’s my duty to do that. She told me that you take music classes after school. So I put you on the list for music class.” He almost said proudly.

Lexa closed her eyes and shook her head. She let out an annoyed sigh. She wanted to say she couldn’t play or read any music but then she would get busted and her mom would know.

“I don’t want to take music class here. I already am.”

“Exactly. You won’t have to study at all and I get to keep you as my star.”

Coach Pike pointed happily at Lexa and snapped his fingers.

Great. Lexa would have to work even harder now and she had no idea how.

 

\----

 

Lexa decided she would arrive on time today and not much earlier to music class. She wanted to give miss Griffin space after their conversation about students and teachers and how they shouldn’t be seen together besides class. Even though Lexa just meant to help her after her situation.

“You got a call from my coach but you didn’t tell me?” Lexa said calmly to her mother, but she wasn’t that calm as you’d think.

Her mom nodded.

“So you knew about me failing two classes and you didn’t talk to me about it?” She said a little less calm now.

Indra nodded again.

“I was just waiting until you would tell me first. But you never did.”

Lexa sighed.

“What’s your point?”

Indra shook her head. “No point.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

“So, you’re not mad?”

“Would that matter to you?”

Lexa scoffed. “I don’t know. It’s not like you’ve ever seen me play baseball so would it matter to you that I’d get kicked out of the team?”

Indra shook her head and laughed a little out of frustration.

“Does it look like I have much time to come and visit your game when I’m working nightshifts?”

“Apparently enough time to check up on me and ground me.”

Indra scoffed again and cleared her throat.

“Do whatever you want. I’m too exhausted to yell at you.” Indra stood up and walked upstairs.

Lexa felt furious but also a bit guilty. She knew Indra was busy doing other stuff and it never bothered Lexa, but she could play dirty if someone was not in their right to say things about her. She knew Indra cared for her after Lexa’s parents died and she was thankful for that, but they just never had a good mother-daughter relationship.

Lexa drove to music class and when she arrived she was the last one to enter. Everyone stared at her. Lexa just made eye contact with the teacher and Miss Griffin followed her with her eyes till she reached the last row.

“Evening.” Lexa said.

Miss Griffin cleared her throat. “Please sit down, Lexa.” She sounded polite and very calm.

Lexa did as she was told and sat down behind everyone again, like she used to.

Miss Griffin let everyone do their thing for a while before she walked over to Lexa. Lexa was just on her phone, texting her friends. Lexa was just doing what she always did at music class: nothing. She knew she probably had to do something because she got placed into music class at school as well. Of course Lexa didn’t want to leave her team. Baseball meant everything to her.

“Hey.” The teacher said as she sat down in front of Lexa.

Lexa looked up at her. The teacher had a worried look on her face.

“Hey.” Lexa said and put her phone away.

“You okay?” She said softly.

Lexa nodded. She wasn’t completely okay, but miss Griffin probably didn’t want to know about that. Just like she thought Lexa didn’t want to know about miss Griffin’s sad story.

“Are you sure? You didn’t show up before class today.”

Lexa shrugged. “We didn’t have an appointment for today, did we?”

The teacher shook her head. “No. We did not.” Right before she wanted to stand up and leave in what seemed to be shame, Lexa stopped her by grabbing her by her arm.

“Why are you asking me then?”

The teacher shrugged. “No reason. I thought you were always earlier here anyway.”

Lexa shook her head. “Not really.”

The teacher nodded in understanding.

“Well, feel free to do so. I still owe you a dance class.”

Lexa tried not to smile but she did anyway. How could you not after miss Griffin told you she wanted to give you private dance lessons?

Lexa just nodded and the teacher smirked before she stood up again to leave her.

Lexa thought of a better idea than those dance classes and she would have to talk later to the teacher about it.

Lexa watched her teacher leave and stared at the way she walked over to another student. Still something about the way she walked.

She waited patiently till miss Griffin had some time for her again, but she never did. Busy like always. She just made eye contact three times in these last two hours (not that she was counting).

Lexa didn’t really do anything these last two hours besides texting her friends and think about miss Griffin’s ex. She was curious how it ended. But she knew she couldn’t ask that. It’s not what miss Griffin wanted.

After class Lexa stood up with the other students this time to leave. She could ask miss Griffin another time about what she wanted to ask.

Lexa walked into the hallway and on her way outside she heard her name behind her. It was the voice she recognized immediately; soft but hoarse.

“Lexa, hold up. I don’t know who you are anymore.” The teacher walked up to her and laughed a little.

“I mean, you never get out of here so fast. You always wait till everybody leaves.” She continued.

Lexa smirked. “I thought you didn’t want that anymore.”

Miss Griffin had a sad look in her eyes, like she felt sorry for it.

All of the other students had already left the building and Lexa was now alone with the teacher.

“I’m sorry I said that the other week. I was just going through a shitty situation and I tend to push people away who try to help me. But I’m still thankful that you offered your help.”

Lexa nodded in understanding. If that was true, Lexa would feel a little better because it wasn’t personal.

“How are you after all that? If you feel like telling me.” Lexa said carefully.

Miss Griffin let out a deep sigh.

“Getting there. I’m starting to realize that I’m probably better off without her.”

“Good. I’m hearing improvement already.”

The teacher scoffed and laughed before remaining silent for a while.

“She did call me yesterday. Out of nowhere.” She said emotionless and stared outside.

Lexa then locked their eyes. She felt good to know the teacher still felt comfortable telling her about it.

“She probably regrets breaking up, doesn’t she?”

The teacher nodded. “Kind of. I just think she misses someone who talks to her every single day.”

Lexa nodded. “Well, I think you deserve better than that. But what did you say to her?”

The teacher gave her a tiny grin. “I told her to leave me alone. It wasn’t that easy, but absolutely the right thing to do. I don’t want to be a second choice you know? She’s probably already going out with other girls and I don’t know why I’m telling you this again.” The teacher let out an embarrassed chuckle.

Lexa smiled. “Probably ‘cause we’ve both been through the same. But I don’t mind. And I’m actually kind of proud of you that you told her that.”

Miss Griffin smirked softly and nodded.

“Your ex dumped you too?”

“Yes. But I didn’t really mind. I wasn’t in love.”

The teacher let out a laugh. “Why is the youth like that?”

Lexa suddenly felt weird. She remembered the teacher was probably a few years older than she was.

Lexa played along and laughed a little. “We know how to enjoy life.”

The teacher smiled and rolled her eyes. “Hey, we old farts can have fun too.”

Lexa laughed. “Old farts?”

The teacher started laughing as well.

“Come on, you’re not that old.” Lexa told her.

Miss Griffin shrugged. “You can’t just ask a lady about her age.” She raised an eyebrow.

Lexa looked down shyly. “You’re right. But I didn’t.”

The teacher raised an eyebrow again. “So, you don’t want to know?”

“Will it make a difference?”

“Yes. Because then you’d understand why I used the term ‘old farts’.”

Lexa rolled her eyes again. “Come on. What are you, 24?”

“26.” She corrected the student.

Lexa had missed their conversations this week. Miss Griffin was always much more loose or maybe even comfortable around Lexa. She just acted so different in class itself. More mature. More strict. More like a teacher.

“See, it’s not that bad. You even look younger.”

“That. Is not. A complement.” The teacher articulated each part of the sentence differently and extra clear.

“It’s not? Well, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.” Lexa gave her a smirk.

The teacher just smiled and rolled her eyes slightly.

“So, will I see you like an hour before class next week? For dancing?” Miss Griffin changed the subject.

“I would really like that, but you could help me with something else actually.”

The teacher stood up straight and paid attention to Lexa.

“Long story short: I’m failing this class and so I switched it for music class but as you know I can’t read or play anything. And I have to get my grades up this month or I’ll get kicked out by my coach on the baseball team.”

Miss Griffin frowned. “Wow, okay. You play baseball?”

Lexa nodded.

“I figured you were the sportive type. But sure, I could help you with that. We’ll start next week?”

Lexa nodded again and smiled. She wondered how the teacher figured that out about her.

“Sounds great even though I still don’t want to learn how to play.”

“I hope I can change your mind about that.” The teacher said in all seriousness.

Lexa shrugged and smiled.

“Cool, so I’ll see you next week before class?” Lexa confirmed for the millionth time.

The teacher nodded. “I promise I won’t go through any more break ups and leave you alone.” She joked.

Lexa laughed a little but then felt bad. “And I promise I won’t get grounded anymore.”

The teacher laughed.

“Deal.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

Lexa wasn’t grounded anymore this week so she could finally leave the house whenever she wanted. That meant that she could go to music class an hour earlier just like miss Griffin asked her to. She could also go to Raven’s birthday party this weekend which she and her friends had been planning for weeks. Lexa just hoped her mom was at work this weekend so she could stay over there at Raven’s without any problem.

But right now her focus was on today’s music class. She would finally be alone with the teacher. She didn’t want to sound creepy but she really enjoyed the teacher’s company. Especially now that the teacher kind of admitted she didn’t mind if Lexa would arrive earlier and keep her company.

Lexa drove home as fast as she could from baseball practice and showered, putting on a sweater and some jeans. She rushed outside, getting stopped by her mom.

“Where are you going?”

“Music class.”

“This early?”

“It’s for extra practice. I told you.”

Indra squinted for a while and Lexa waited impatiently. She didn’t really know why she waited. She didn’t owe her mom an explanation. But she didn’t want to fight again so she waited.

“Mom, I’m gonna be late.”

Her mom sighed. “I want you here on time even though I won’t be here when you get back.”

“Okay.” Lexa said and opened the door. As long as she got out of the house, she was safe.

Lexa drove to music class and she was just on time. She entered the building and frowned when she heard some music coming out of nowhere. She slowly walked to the classroom and saw the door was open. She stood still in the door opening and could see miss Griffin playing the guitar and humming a song, her back towards Lexa.

Lexa thought it was absolutely beautiful and it felt like her energy shifted around the room, leaving her powerless. There was something about it that made her calm listening to miss Griffin play guitar and humming to it. Lexa soundlessly leaned against the wall and crossed her arms, listening and admiring the teacher being in her element.

Lexa stared at the teacher who was wearing a loose shirt, skinny jeans and her hair was in a perfect bun. She looked so pretty with her hair tied up like that.

The husky teacher’s voice was still audible in her humming and Lexa couldn’t help but close her eyes and focus on the way she hit the notes. The guitar play was flawless and pure and Lexa stayed there a little while more, not wanting to interrupt the teacher.

Miss Griffin finished the song soon enough and stood up after to place the guitar back on its place.

Lexa let fall a moment of silence before she started clapping softly.

When the teacher turned around from the sound she met with Lexa and jumped a little when she saw her.

“Oh my god don’t do that.” She reached with her hand to her chest and after calming down she sat down behind her desk again.

Lexa let out a little laugh and walked up to her.

“That was really beautiful.” Lexa said genuine and locked their eyes.

Miss Griffin loosened up a bit and let out a laugh and Lexa thought she saw her cheeks turn a little red. “Thank you. How long were you standing there?”

“For like five minutes.”

“You could’ve just said something. I didn’t figure you were the shy type.” The teacher raised an eyebrow.

Lexa gave her a wide grin. “I didn’t want to interrupt you.”

Miss Griffin shook her head and laughed. “Let’s just start and forget this embarrassing moment.”

She stood up and walked towards Lexa to face her. Lexa didn’t think there was anything embarrassing about what just happened. She thought it was beautiful the way miss Griffin was playing guitar.

Miss Griffin raised an eyebrow. “What instrument would you like to play?”

Lexa widened her eyes and shrugged. She hadn’t thought about that.

“I don’t know. What would you recommend?”

Miss Griffin squinted and then smiled.

“I told you before, I think you will love the drums.”

Lexa let out a sigh. “Is it easy?”

Miss Griffin walked over to the drums and pointed towards it. Lexa followed her.

“No.”

“Then I don’t want to do it.”

“Is baseball easy?” The teacher asked.

Lexa laughed a little. “No… But at least it’s fun.”

The teacher rolled her eyes and pushed Lexa’s shoulders to guide her to sit down. It caught Lexa by surprise and so she let herself guide to sit down. The teacher stood behind Lexa, still her hands on her shoulders.

“You want to keep playing baseball don’t you?”

Lexa’s heart was pounding fast and she froze for a good minute after the teacher let her go. She was hoping her little southern ma’am wouldn’t show up like that. Sometimes it could come a little unexpected. At least she didn’t really feel it at the moment but then again her heart was pounding like crazy.

She quickly looked down to double check and felt relieved when she saw she wasn’t showing.

Lexa swallowed and nodded. “Of course.”

Suddenly she got two drumsticks in her hands again. She grabbed a music book and held it in her hands.

“Move aside.” The teacher said and sat down next to Lexa on the same stool.

There were the nerves again. Lexa was glad she had showered and put on some deodorant just now.

The teacher held the book in front on them. “Do you know how to read musical notes?”

Lexa shook her head. The teacher looked at Lexa’s eyes and then smirked.

“That’s okay. I can teach you.”

Lexa smiled and watched the teacher’s eyes from up close. They were so dreamy blue.

“That is why I’m here.” Lexa told her.

The teacher nodded and explained her the musical notes but Lexa wasn’t paying attention to the content. She was too fascinated about the way the teacher talked with so much passion. Sometimes it even seemed like she had to catch her breath because of it.

“You got it?” The teacher raised her voice a little which made Lexa think this wasn’t the first time she asked her.

Lexa got snapped back into reality and sat up straight. She cleared her throat and nodded.

The teacher seemed to have her doubts but then nodded. “Go ahead. What’s the first one?”

Lexa swallowed loudly and she didn’t really understand it one bit. All she knew is what a music note looked like and that was about it. Lexa decided to loosen up a bit and make a conversation while trying to read the music in front of her.

“Lexa?”

“What song were you playing back there?”

The teacher stared at Lexa before answering. She smiled shyly, something Lexa hadn’t really seen her do before.

“I wrote it.”

Lexa raised both eyebrows.

“You write songs?” Of course she did. And it was perfection, too.

The teacher laughed. “Is that so unbelievable?”

Lexa shook her head. “No. But I mean you should do something with that. It sounded really good.”

“I am. I’m teaching you.”

Lexa shook her head. “I mean, publish it. Your songs.”

“Woah there, I only wrote like one song and besides, it’s never good enough for it to be published.”

“You could go to a record label and sign a contract.” Lexa ignored her teacher.

She laughed again. “You’re kidding.”

“No, I’m serious. You could be an idol for sure. You can sing, play guitar, dance.” Lexa laughed and she realized she should stop talking before the teacher thought she wasn’t being genuine about it.

The teacher cleared her throat. “Well, I appreciate your opinion Lexa, but you’re not trying to distract me from teaching you how to play drums, right?”

Lexa let out a laugh. How was she always so sharp?

“You’re no fun.” Lexa said and she thought it sounded like she was talking to a friend so she didn’t know how miss Griffin would interpret it. But she already said it and couldn’t take it back.

“I, an old fart, can have fun too.”

Lexa burst out into laughter and she was happy the teacher wasn’t bothered by it at all.

The teacher laughed a little too. “Now come on. You want to pass music class, don’t you?”

Lexa nodded. “Only ‘cause I have to.”

Miss Griffin gave her a grin and for another 20 minutes she sat next to Lexa, explaining her how to hold the sticks when playing and reading the notes, and for the first time Lexa was actually paying attention to what the teacher was saying. She wanted this. She wanted to pass music class so she could stay in her baseball team. Yes. That was absolutely the only reason she was here.

After 30 minutes the first student came in and miss Griffin didn’t  know how fast she had to get away from Lexa which left Lexa a little disappointed.

“Good evening, Monty.”

There she was in full teacher mode again.

“Good evening miss Griffin.” The boy said back gently and sat down.

The teacher walked over to Monty (which Lexa had just learned the name of) and leaned her back against the wall, arms crossed. Lexa noticed she had just been left behind by the teacher but she didn’t mind looking at her from a distance.

“You’re early today.”

“Yes, I was hoping I could talk to you about something.”

Lexa’s ears suddenly went wide open but pretended to be reading in the drum book.

“Are you okay?” Lexa heard her teacher being worried.

“Yes I’m okay. I just need to…” He let out a sigh.

“What is it?” The teacher asked worriedly again.”

“I need a favor from you. But it’s okay if you say no.”

The teacher frowned and sat down now. She quickly exchanged looks with Lexa who was no longer reading her music book.

“Okay…” The teacher was still frowning.

“So… I’m in this class at school”

The teacher hummed. Not sure where this was going.

“And we have to do like a little concert. In front of all the parents in like a month at school.’’

The teacher frowned and nodded.

“And we have to make a good impression and I can’t pair up with the rest of the students ‘cause they’re already paired up. And since I’m the new guy, nobody wanted to pair up with me. And I asked my teacher, he said it was cool if I would ask someone else I knew who plays an instrument.”

The teacher’s eyes widened and locked eyes with Lexa again. Lexa’s expression was shocked as well.

“Would you maybe like to attend this little concert with me? I know you must be good at any instrument.”

“Wow, Monty, erm... That is so nice of you.” She switched from Monty to Lexa again and let out a little laugh.

The guy switched to Lexa too. “Don’t I know you?”

Lexa shrugged. “Polis High School?” She asked the boy.

He nodded. “I already thought you looked familiar. You’re the baseball player, right?”

“Yeah.”

Miss Griffin looked surprised the guy knew Lexa even though he was new at their school.

“I haven’t seen you before in music class. Or aren’t you in it?” He said confused.

Lexa scoffed and remained silent. She had been skipping lately.

Miss Griffin stood up and sat behind her desk again.

“Lexa, have you been paired up with anyone for this concert?”

Lexa shook her head. “Wait, we actually have to do that?”

Monty nodded.

Shit. Not this too.

“Well, I think it’s settled then. This can’t be a coincidence. You should pair up with each other.” The teacher gave them a grin.

Lexa and Monty stared at each other emptily.

The rest of the students walked in one by one and they all sat down in class just now.

After a while everyone was busy with their instrument, even Lexa. She was trying something out when she saw the teacher walking towards her. This time she didn’t sit down on the same stool but on the chair right next to Lexa. It was just Lexa noticed she did that when there were others around.

“Sounds good.” The teacher smiled but Lexa couldn’t smile right now.

Lexa remained silent and looked in her book.

“You okay?” The teacher asked again.

Lexa sighed. “I don’t know how I’m gonna do this. I’m not pairing up with that Monty guy by the way.”

Miss Griffin raised an eyebrow. “Why not?”

“Because I’m not going to the concert.”

Miss Griffin looked almost mad at Lexa. “Because?”

“Because I’m not gonna embarrass myself in front of everyone.”

“That won’t happen, Lexa.”

Lexa shivered at the soft way the teacher said her name.

“I can’t play any of this shit. How do you expect me to learn all of this in less than a month?” Lexa didn’t raise her voice but she was about to.

“Just calm down. I can help you.” Miss Griffin said calmly.

Lexa locked their eyes. She had a desperate expression on her face. What if her mom would show up there and she would find out that Lexa can’t play any instrument at all? If she wasn’t working of course. It was already embarrassing enough she would be seen like that by the whole school.

Lexa sighed. “You’re gonna need a miracle then.”

The teacher remained silent for a while and then she had Lexa’s attention back by placing a hand on her knee. Lexa jumped slightly because she didn’t expect it but then felt quiet comfortable by the contact.

“I’m willing to help you, but you need to let me. We could plan in a few days to practice together.” She took her hand back to clutch it together with her other hand and looked questionably at Lexa.

Lexa was mortified at those words and she didn’t know what scared her more: being alone with the teacher or practicing for something almost impossible.

Lexa carefully nodded because she wanted this. She had to give it a try. And being able to do this together with the teacher was more than she could ever ask for. She was actually thrilled. But scared.

“Yes?” The teacher asked again.

“Yeah. I would like that.”

The teacher smiled. “Good. I’ll give you my number after class and you just call me or text me whenever you want to practice.”

Lexa’s body froze for the third time today and just nodded. She seemed to do that more often when she was shocked. She never thought she would get miss Griffin’s number like this.

Only to use it for drumming practice of course.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I needed this chapter for the rest of the story, so no face to face meet up between teacher and student this time, I'm sorry... Hope you still enjoy!

Lexa was having a great time at Raven’s birthday party. She was wasted, having fun with literally everyone at the party, including some really hot girls. Her mom was also working the night shift for today so Lexa could stay over at Raven’s house without any problem or curfews.

“I’ve been hearing some things about you.” A girl with dark hair said.

Lexa smirked and took another sip from her beer. “Is that so? All good things I hope.”

The girl let out a chuckle.

“I heard you’re the baseballs team’s captain.”

Lexa gave her a smug smirk. “They’re not wrong.”

“And that you’re pretty muscly.” The girl reached for Lexa’s biceps and pinched them a little.

Lexa hated these kind of cliché’s, but she loved the attention anyway.

“And that you’ve got something interesting the rest of these girl don’t.” She said in a low voice.

The girl was looking at her crutch and Lexa knew exactly what she meant.

Lexa let her look a bit longer before she took a step closer towards the girl. The girl didn’t look away from her. She had a hungry look in her eyes and then Lexa didn’t know what went through her mind but she just kissed the girl. Maybe it was because it had been almost a month since she had sex or maybe it was the alcohol, maybe both, but she kissed the girl sloppily and fast and grabbed her by the waist. She didn’t know whether the girl or herself tasted like alcohol, but Lexa didn’t care to find out. She kept kissing her and Lexa brought the girl a little closer by the wall behind her. The girl broke the kiss once touching the wall and looked around her a little embarrassed.

“What?” Lexa said out of breath.

The girl smiled and bit her lip.

“I also heard you sleep around with everyone. And I’m not that kind of girl.”

The girl let go off Lexa and grabbed her purse.

Lexa whined and tried to stop her.

“Don’t listen to people. I mean, you’re not leaving, right? I don’t even know your name.” Lexa rambled on. She wasn’t going to let this slip away from her. She needed release. Right now.

The girl smiled. “Ontari. And yes, I am leaving indeed. But you should call me.”

“Ontari, huh? That’s a pretty name for a pretty girl.”

The girl laughed and shook her head.

“So, how am I going to reach you without your number?”

Ontari shrugged. “You’ll figure something out.” She almost whispered and walked away.

Lexa walked after her, tripping over her own feet. “I know what you’re doing. But you’re not like any other girl, alright?”

She was. Lexa just needed release.

Ontari turned around to face Lexa and laughed.

“Then you’ll figure something out to get my number.” She smiled one last time and left Lexa behind, in the middle of the party.

Lexa let out an annoyed sigh and turned around to sit down somewhere. She had been drinking way too much.

She struggled to sit down by herself for a while and pulled out her phone. She scrolled down her contacts on her phone until she saw Miss Griffin’s name. She was wondering what Miss Griffin was doing at this moment? Was she playing some guitar? Was she sleeping? Was she going out?

Lexa didn’t think twice before texting her. She didn’t care. She just wanted the answer to what her teacher was doing.

 

**Lexa 1:14 am  
** _What r u doing?_

Lexa waited impatiently for her text and looked around her.

Bingo. There was Costia.

Lexa immediately stood up (and almost lost balance) and walked slowly towards Costia.

“Hey.” Lexa said dumbly.

“Hi.”

“Long time no see.”

Costia laughed a little.

“I guess.”

“So, like, are you okay?” Lexa breathed out, her eyes half closed.

Costia raised her eyebrows and nodded.

“Yeah, but are you?”

Lexa nodded quickly. “Now that I see you.” She half lied.

Costia rolled her eyes and grabbed Lexa’s hand to pull her with her upstairs.

Lexa happily but clumsy followed her upstairs. Costia took her in close and whispered in her ear.

“How drunk are you?”

Lexa shrugged and smiled. “I’m alright.” She wasn’t.

“So you wouldn’t just have sex with me because you’re drunk?”

Lexa immediately shook her head. She heard the word ‘sex’ and she was all ears.

“Then what are you waiting for?” Costia said hungrily and roughly grabbed Lexa’s crutch.

Lexa gasped at her touch and then unwieldy leaned in to kiss her. They walked into the bedroom and didn’t care to close the door. Costia was being pushed against the wall roughly but she wasn’t complaining.

Lexa wasn’t sure what she was doing and if she was alright, but she didn’t care. She needed someone right now to find release in.

Lexa stopped because she felt her phone buzzing. She hoped it was who she thought it was. She grabbed her phone and looked Costia in the eyes who was out of breath with a questioning expression on her face.

“I- have to go.” Lexa said drunkenly.

She heard Costia yell something put she didn’t hear what it was because she saw who texted her.

**Miss Griffin 1:38 am  
** _Who is this?_

 

Lexa slapped her forehead. She forgot to type her name in the text. Lexa sat down in the hallway on the floor upstairs and tried her best to type well enough for the teacher to understand.

**Lexa 1:40 am  
** _It’s Lexa Woods_

**Miss Griffin 1:41 am  
**_Oh hi Lexa. Don’t tell me you’re practicing at the moment…_ ****  
  


Lexa’s smile grew wide.

 

**Lexa 1:42 am  
** _I’m not_

**Miss Griffin 1:44 am  
** _Ok well, are you okay? Can I help you with something?_

 

Lexa didn’t exactly know what she wanted from the teacher. Just talking to her was already fine. But she realized it was weird she texted the teacher without a reason. Lexa was so busy texting she didn’t realize Costia walked past her and yelled ‘don’t ever try something with me again’. Lexa thought of something that wouldn’t sound weird to the teacher.

**Lexa 1:47 am  
** _Just wanted to say that u have a nice voice_

**Miss Griffin 1:48 am  
** _Erm haha thanks?_

 

Then Lexa realized how stupid it sounded what she had just typed. She got a slight panic attack when she read her own text again. She started typing fast.

**Lexa 1:49 am  
** _I mean I heard u humming the other day to ur songgg_

**Miss Griffin 1:51 am  
** _Right, I almost forgot about that…_

**Lexa 1:51 am  
** _I didn’t_

How could she forget something like that.

 

**Miss Griffin 1:52 am  
** _So, can I help you with something? ‘Cause I just wanted to go to sleep… :-)_

 

Lexa felt bad all of a sudden. She was keeping Miss Griffin up all this time while she wanted to sleep.

 

**Lexa 1:53 am  
** _Im sorry…. didn’t want to bother u…._

**Miss Griffin 1:54 am  
** _No, it’s fine. You okay?_

**Lexa 1:54 am  
** ::-) Im ok. I wish u a very very good night

 

Lexa had to squint every time she texted or read, ‘cause she couldn’t read it that well.

 

**Miss Griffin 1:56 am  
** _Glad to hear that.  Good night to you too and text me whenever you want to practice together, ok?_

Lexa smiled and laughed dumbly.

 

**Lexa 1:58 am** _  
I am texting u right now_

 

Lexa forgot the teacher wanted to sleep so she immediately send her another message.

 

**Lexa 1:58 am  
** _Gnight Ms Griffin_

**Miss Griffin 2:00 am  
** _Wish I could make it right now, but that’s a little hard since I’m already wearing my pj’s. You get that, right?_

Lexa laughed again. She was glad the teacher could still joke with her. And she didn’t think about her teacher in pajamas. Especially not in shorts or a tank top…

 

**Lexa 2:01 am  
** _We could totally have a pj’s party_

**Miss Griffin 2:02 am  
** _We totally could. But something tells me you’re not wearing anything like your pj’s right now_

Lexa smiled for the hundredth time tonight and thought about how drunk she was and that she gave that so easily away to the teacher.

 

**Lexa 2:02 am  
** _Are u spying on me ??_

**Miss Griffin 2:03 am  
** _Maybe… Goodnight Lexa_

Lexa wished she would be here right now at the same party. She would be happy to show her teacher around. But maybe that would be weird because she was her teacher.

**Lexa 2:03 am  
** _Sweet dreams…._

Lexa waited a minute or five before she noticed Miss Griffin didn’t respond anymore. She was a little disappointed but happy the teacher was probably peacefully asleep. She had to text her tomorrow if she wouldn’t be ashamed for what she texted her tonight. Yes, she would definitely have to text her tomorrow.

 

\----

 

Lexa woke up by the bright light of the sun in her face. Lexa slowly opened her eyes and immediately felt like she was going to die. Her head was killing her and all she wanted to do is puke. And she did that morning. Twice.

She laid down next to Raven in bed because her bed was way bigger than Lexa’s and Raven immediately made a protesting noise.

“Get away from me, pukehead.” Raven mumbled into her pillow.

Lexa almost vomited again at the word ‘pukehead’.

“Fuck.” Lexa breathed out.

“You’ve had some fun last night, didn’t you?”

Lexa thought about what happened last night because she could barely remember anything.

“I think so.” She said in a husky, sick voice.

Raven laughed. “I saw you leave with Costia upstairs.”

Lexa’s eyes widened. She suddenly remembered being with Costia.

“I don’t think we did anything.” Lexa breathed out and then it hit her. Lexa gasped and almost flew to her phone.

“Shit shit shit.” She whispered.

“Oh no she’s not going to have another pregnancy scare, right?” Raven turned around on her back. Raven didn’t believe Lexa and Costia didn’t do anything for some reason. She also wasn’t that hungover and Lexa didn’t understand why not. They had been drinking the same amount probably.

Lexa ignored her and quickly looked through her text messages.

She cursed again when she saw what she had done last night. She texted her teacher at 2 am on a Saturday night. Randomly.

Lexa felt her puke coming up again.

She had to text her again. Now. But she couldn’t.

“You okay Lex?” Raven asked now worried.

“I’m sorry, I really need to do something.”

“Do what?” Raven stood up and came closer to Lexa. Lexa was so busy texting she didn’t notice Raven standing behind her, reading with her.

“The hell is Miss Griffin?” Raven asked confused as she was.

Lexa jumped a little.

“No one.” She stood up and walked away from her.

Raven frowned. “Oh I get it. One of your booty calls?”

Lexa scoffed and kept so texting fast she felt almost dizzy. Or maybe it was the hangover.

**Lexa 11:38 am  
** _Good morning Miss Griffin, I’m so sorry to have bothered you last night. I know it’s not an excuse but I had a drink to many. It won’t happen again._

 

Lexa let out a deep sigh and saw Raven looking at her like she owned her an explanation.

“Who is that?” Raven asked again.

“No one.” Lexa repeated.

Raven walked towards her to grab her phone away. Lexa tried running away but immediately stopped because she could feel it coming up again. Her puke.

Raven was able to grab her phone while Lexa was trying to hold it in. She laid down on the floor and felt pretty messed up about everything.

Raven went silent for a while before she burst out into laughter.

“Oh my god practice? Damn you’re really experimenting, aren’t you?”

Lexa yelled. “No!” She held in her puke again.

“It’s not like that. At all. It’s my music teacher.”

Raven’s eyes widened and sat down next to Lexa.

“You have a text back from her but first I want an explanation.”

Lexa immediately sat up straight, ready to grab her phone back but failed.

“There’s not much to tell, okay. She’s just giving me extra practice at drumming for music class at school. My other teacher got replaced by her a month ago. That’s all.” She lied.

Raven raised an eyebrow. It was like she looked right through her.

“Is she hot?”

Lexa remained silent for a while, not knowing what to tell her.

“She is?” Raven said surprised.

“Raven…”

“Jesus, Woods. You really are like a rabbit.” She laughed on and on.

“Just give me my phone back.” Lexa said annoyed.

Raven did as she was told but kept laughing.

 

**Miss Griffin 11:47 am  
** _Hi Lexa, don’t worry about it. It means you think about music even when you’re drunk… Which is good! Are you too hungover? Otherwise we could meet up later for practice maybe?_

 

Lexa froze. Of course she thought about music class. But not about the drums or the piano or something else her teacher thought she would think about. And yes, she was way too hungover, but she was thrilled about the thought of being with the teacher on this Sunday.

“You’re gonna meet up?” Raven asked.

Lexa tried holding back her smile but she failed.

“You’re crazy, Woods. I’ve got so many questions right now.” She paused.  “She’s your teacher.” Raven could still laugh about it though.

“It’s not like that, I told you.”

“She’s hot. Period.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and stood up.

“I mean it. It’s not like that. She’s my teacher.” Lexa disappointed herself with her own words.

Raven nodded.

“If you say so.”

Lexa nodded and started texting back.

 

**Lexa 11:51 am  
** _Sure, that’d be nice. How about tonight? I don’t think I’ll feel sick anymore tonight… :-)_

**Miss Griffin 11:52 am  
** _I think that’ll work. This underage drinking thing you’re doing… I shouldn’t be involved in this mess because I’m your teacher and a responsible adult… Or as I call it ‘an old fart’._

Lexa knew Raven was watching her so she tried her best to keep a straight face.

 

**Lexa 11:53 am  
** _I mean… At least you’re a fun old fart?_

**Miss Griffin 11:54 am  
** _Don’t try and butter me up. (Even though you’re not wrong!!)_

_  
_ Lexa let out a silent laugh and Raven noticed. But Lexa didn’t bother looking up to her.

 

**Lexa 11:54 am  
** _See, you already made me laugh. At what time do I see you later in class?_

**Miss Griffin 11:55 am  
** _Thank god there’s living proof of me making someone laugh… How about we do eight?_

 

Lexa smiled again.

 

**Lexa 11:55 am  
** _Cool, see you then!_


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonding time!

 

 

Lexa was right about before.

She was feeling way better than this morning. She had showered twice and brushed her teeth. More than twice.She raced to music class at eight and saw Miss Griffin was already there behind her desk.

“Good evening.” Lexa greeted happily and sat down.

“Wow, you’ve made it.” The teacher said. She was reading a piece of paper in front of her, Lexa saw it was a sheet of music.

“Of course.”

“I wasn’t so sure after your text this morning.” She said seriously.

Lexa laughed it off awkwardly.

“Well, let’s start, shall we?” The teacher immediately came down to business and stood up. Lexa followed her to the drums and sat down. She wondered what had changed the teacher's mood suddenly.

After a while, Lexa was already playing the drums again. It was hot in the room and even though Lexa had just showered, she felt like she could shower again. Maybe it was because it was pretty hot outside. Or maybe because Miss Griffin was sitting right next to her on the same stool or maybe it was because she was wearing a high waisted skirt again and some heels, her hair was down again and Lexa wondered if she dressed up like this every day.

“I’m guessing your parents don’t know about you drinking illegally?” The teacher said after a few minutes literally out of nowhere.

Lexa swallowed.

“No. It’s just me and my aunt anyway. She doesn’t care that much.” She lied. Lexa locked their eyes and saw the teacher frowning.

“Your aunt?” The teacher looked confused.

Lexa nodded. “My parents died in a car accident when I was ten, so my aunt’s been raising me since. I do call her my mom though.”

The teacher widened her eyes.

“I’m so sorry to hear that.” The teacher laid a hand on Lexa’s shoulder to comfort her, and Lexa didn’t know whether to relax or become more nervous.

Lexa shrugged slightly. “It’s okay.” But she was really just swallowing back the lump in her throat.

The teacher looked almost through her, a worried look on her face. Lexa gave her a smile to lighten up the mood, but that didn’t seem to help.

The teacher pulled her hand back and stared at her feet.

“I kind of know how you feel. I lost my dad when I was sixteen. He was sick.”

Lexa suddenly felt almost worse for her than she did for herself. She hesitated a bit, but then placed her hand on her teacher’s back to comfort her. The teacher jumped slightly at the touch and Lexa slowly pulled her hand back. She didn’t want to make the teacher uncomfortable.

She had no idea about this. The teacher never shared anything else except for that one time with her ex-girlfriend. Anyhow, she knew the teacher’s pain. She knew how she felt.

“I’m sorry. That must’ve been hard for you.” Lexa said genuine.

The teacher locked their eyes and gave her a grin. Lexa couldn’t get over how blue her eyes were.

“He was my best friend, so yes, it was really hard for me.”

Lexa nodded understandably. Miss Griffin sounded so vulnerable, she had never heard it before.

“No one should have to go through that.” Lexa said.

The teacher shook her head in agreement.

“What about you? Were you close with your parents?” She asked.

“Very.” Lexa said. “Especially with my mom.”

The teacher nodded. “Really? Is your aunt like your mom?”

Lexa scoffed and started laughing. “Absolutely not.”

The teacher had a questioning look on her face. “Why?”        

Lexa let out a sigh. Lexa never shared anything about her aunt. She didn’t feel that comfortable talking about her to other people, because she didn’t want to say bad things about her.

“Let’s just say I’m not the perfect daughter and she’s not the perfect mother and that doesn’t go well together.”

The teacher gave her a sad smirk.

“Nobody’s perfect. That can’t be the reason why you don’t get along, Lexa.”

Lexa shivered for one second after hearing Miss Griffin say her name like that and listened to the different type of voice the teacher used for comforting her. She was so different when she was being serious. Still Miss Griffin, but different.

Lexa inhaled deeply and locked eyes again with the blonde.

“She didn’t ask for her to raise me. Neither did I. She gives me food and a place to live though, so I’m thankful for that.”

Another sigh and silence.

The teacher nodded again and placed her hand on Lexa’s leg now. “You shouldn’t have gone through that by yourself.”

Lexa stared at the teacher’s hand on her leg. Her hand felt warm on her pants and it was comforting right now. She didn’t know why the teacher’s touches made her so nervous. She did it all the time with other girls. Without feeling nervous. Without hesitating to touch them.

Silence.

Lexa wanted to change the conversation because she didn’t want to keep thinking about this depressing stuff. That was the whole point of drinking. She would drink her pain away every time she would drink.

“So, how’s Niylah? Niylah was it, right?”  

The teacher clutched her own fingers and Lexa already regretted her decision of asking.

“I wouldn’t know. I haven’t talked to her in days.” She gave Lexa a little grin.

Lexa felt a little relieved. Only because Miss Griffin deserved much better than that.

“That’s good, right?”

The teacher nodded. “It is. It’s been actually really peaceful without her. No more drama. I never thought I could get used to have a life without her, you know?” She sighed. “God, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be talking about this to you.” She chuckled embarrassed. “Now, where were we?”

“It’s fine. I’ve told you about my party hook ups. Seems only fair.” Lexa tried to joke.

The teacher let out a laugh.

“It wasn’t a hook up though. I haven’t done hook ups in a very long time.”

Lexa was all ears. “But you have done it before?” Lexa was kind of enjoying this. She loved hearing stories about her teacher’s private life. It felt like she trusted her.

Lexa could only imagine she and Miss Griffin were the same age, at the same school, attending the same class, going to the same party’s.

The teacher tried to laugh it off. “Sure, when I was a teenager.”

“Wow.” Lexa said impressed. Maybe she and her teacher were more alike than she thought. “And you wouldn’t want to do it again? Enjoy your single life?”

“No, I’m not like you. Now, let’s continue.”

Or maybe not.

The teacher laughed a little bit and Lexa could tell she found it a bit awkward. Which was weird because her teacher was always so confident and bossing everyone around.

Lexa also felt a little disturbed the teacher thought of her as a womanizer like that. She really wasn’t in her opinion.

Lexa smirked slightly and picked up her drumming again, leaving the rest of the conversation alone.

Both of them remained comfortably silent for a few long minutes, Lexa was only playing the drums. It went better and better every time and Lexa had really improved her drumming skills since a few weeks ago. She didn’t want to admit it, but she kind of enjoyed herself too playing the big instrument. She could see her teacher was happy as well that she was such a quick learner.

Lexa had to be, the concert would take place in three weeks. She wasn’t excited at all about it, but at least she had Monty who was pretty good at playing guitar. Lexa just had to drum along to his guitar and everything would be fine.

After a while the teacher stood up to grab herself some water and Lexa tried to keep going but she was too distracted watching her teacher leave.

“Come take a break.” The teacher told her and offered her some water as well. The teacher sat on her desk, waiting for Lexa to come and join her.

Lexa gave her a thankful nod and stood in front of her, both drinking their glass of water. Lexa felt the teacher’s eyes on her all the time until Lexa looked back at her. The teacher didn’t look away though.

“Are you doing okay?” The teacher frowned.

Lexa raised an eyebrow. “Yeah? Why?”

The teacher shrugged.

“I know it’s not any of my business, but the way you’re handling your drinking, it might become a problem someday.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow. “I thought you were an old fun fart, not my mother.” Lexa laughed silently.

The teacher shook her head in disagreement. “I’m being serious. I don’t know if it’s true, but I think you’re drinking away your problems.”

Lexa’s eyes wandered nervously around the room. She remained silent and took another sip of her drink.

Miss Griffin frowned. “Aren’t you?”

“So?”

“So? Lexa, this is serious.”

Lexa locked their eyes, listening to her teacher. How could she ever know?

“I’m not an alcoholic.”

“No, but one day your problems and pain won’t go away with one night of drinking and then you’ll become one.”

Lexa scoffed.

“That won’t happen.”

“It could happen. I know it feels great when you can’t feel anything anymore and forget about the rest of your problems. Your pain.”

Lexa gave her a little smile and let out a deep sigh. Lexa figured her teacher had more experience with this. But Lexa wasn’t an alcoholic. She only drank at parties (way too much) and when she felt really shitty. But it really wasn’t that many times. She was really trying not to.

“I started drinking not long after my parents died. After my problems became bigger. Drinking makes me feel better.”

Lexa didn’t know if there was still alcohol in her body that made her say the truth but her point was clear.

“Drinking makes you forget the pain.” The teacher filled in for her and gave Lexa a soft grin.

Lexa nodded. It felt like the teacher knew exactly what she was talking about.

“What about you? You seem to have some knowledge about this subject.”

The teacher gave her a smirk and nodded.

“After my dad died I started drinking every day. It was the only thing making me feel better.”

Ah, there it was.

Lexa nodded like she was completely following what the teacher said.

“And now? You just stopped drinking?”

“Yes. Eventually I did. It took me a long time but I barely drink anymore. I haven’t been drunk in years.”

Lexa looked impressed. And a little bit of jealousy crossed her mind. Lexa wasn’t always drinking but when she was, she would cross a line every time.

“Again, I’m not here to mother you around but I want you to be okay. Think about it. Maybe you won’t text your other teachers in the middle of the night again.” Miss Griffin said with the tiniest smile at the end. She was trying to make Lexa smile a little and for some reason it worked.

Lexa nodded again. She knew the teacher was right. It’s just that no one has ever talked to her about it like this. It almost felt like a taboo until now.

“Thanks.” Was all Lexa said but she felt relieved. More than she thought.

Miss Griffin showed her a smile.

“You’ve really improved by the way. Your drumming sounds better than last week.”

Lexa smiled and was kind of glad she had started about another subject.

“Thanks again. What about you? Have you written any more songs?”

The teacher let out a laugh.

“Not exactly. I tried finishing my song from the other day.”

“Let’s hear it.”

The teacher immediately shook her head and laughed.

“Oh come on. When you’ll be famous and giving concerts everywhere, you can’t be shy either.”

The blonde scoffed. “I’m absolutely not shy. Or famous. It’s just not finished yet.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow saying she didn’t care.

“I’ll play it for you next Wednesday, alright?”

“I won’t forget.” Lexa promised.

“Sadly, I know.”

The teacher gave Lexa a soft smile and Lexa couldn’t help but smile back. She got too excited about the thought of seeing Miss Griffin again in a few days.

Her teacher smiled again and bit her lip which forced Lexa to stare at it.

She was starting to really like music class.

 

\----

 

“Woods, did you meet up with Miss Teacher yesterday?”

Lexa was packing in her stuff to walk to her other class with Anya but Raven felt like quickly visiting them. She had another class right now.

“Miss Griffin, and yes I did.”

“Oh excuse me. And, did you play with her ‘instruments?’” Raven started laughing hysterically.

Not the instruments she meant.

Lexa shook her head. “Come on, Reyes, back off. I told you it’s not like that.”

“Okay obviously I’m missing something.” Anya said.

“She hasn’t told you yet?” Raven turned to Lexa. “You haven’t told her yet?”

“There’s nothing to tell.” Lexa said annoyed and together they walked out of the classroom.

“Lexa’s new music teacher is apparently super hot and Lexa texted her at my party like it was the most normal thing to do. Texting your teacher in the middle of the night and then meeting up them next day to ‘practice’ for music stuff.”

Lexa shook her head.

“What? How do I not know about this?” Anya almost sounded offended.

Lexa stood still in the middle of the hallway, both facing her two best friends.

“Look, yes, I texted her. I was drunk. But who do you think I am? I’m not gonna booty call my teacher or something.” Lexa scoffed and walked further to class.

The two other girls followed her.

“But you’re Lexa Woods.” Raven said obvious.

Lexa rolled her eyes. Usually she didn’t really care her friends talked about her like this. Sometimes she was even enjoying her reputation. But this was different. Miss Griffin deserved better just being a booty call. Especially after what happened with Niylah.

“Wow.” Was all Anya said.

Lexa felt a little guilty Raven knew about it and Anya didn’t. But really, there wasn’t much to tell, right? Lexa and Miss Griffin were having a perfectly normal student-teacher relationship.

“An, I’m sorry for not telling you earlier. I just didn’t think it would matter that much because it’s really nothing you guys.”

Anya let out a sigh. “It’s fine I guess. Just don’t do it again.” She smiled a little and Lexa smiled back.

“Speaking of, I saw you and Ontari exchange saliva at the party. What was that about?” Anya continued.

“Echo’s cousin?” Raven blurted out in shock.

Lexa’s eyes widened.

“That. Was Echo’s cousin?” Lexa almost screamed out.

Both girls started laughing so hard that Raven almost fell on the ground.

“You fucked Echo’s cousin? She’s gonna kill now you for sure.” Raven said when she caught her breath.

Shit. How could Lexa not know about that?

“Fuck.” Lexa said. “We didn’t do anything else though. I only remember she walking away from me without giving me her number. She really wanted me to come after her, but I was way too drunk for even walking.”

Both girls started laughing again.

“You should totally do it next time just to piss Echo off. Next party is in two weeks after the baseball game.” Anya started. “We should invite her for you. It’ll be a win-win situation. Except for Echo.”

Lexa shook her head. She didn’t feel like doing that and she didn’t really know why. At the party she sure wanted to bury herself inside of her.

“I don’t know guys. Maybe I should leave Echo and Echo’s family alone, you know.” Lexa said dry.

Raven wondered.

“Where’s the fun in that?”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm really trying to update every weekend and every wednesday. So that's what I will continue to do. Just so you know!
> 
> This chapter takes place the first wednesday after they practiced on Sunday...
> 
> Enjoy...

“Do not forget the finale takes place in two weeks on a Friday. I know we still have one game to go, but there’s not much that can’t go wrong so we don’t get to the finales.” Coach Pike told them.

The coach switched looks with everyone in the team. They were all listening to him like they were about to go to war. Lexa stood next to Anya, arms crossed. She rolled her eyes at the attempt of making everyone excited about the game, but Lexa was confident about this. She had been training way too hard to screw this up.

“I want all of you to train hard today than other days. Lexa, show me I won’t regret the choice of making you captain.”

Lexa nodded. “Got it.”

“Good. Everyone on your positions.” Their coach shouted and everyone did as they were told. Lexa was so ready. First she had baseball practice and after this she had music class with Miss Griffin. This day could not get any better.

“Lexa, I want to see you after practice.” Lexa was a little confused but only nodded before hitting the baseball in front of her. It didn’t matter, nothing could go wrong right now.

Practice passed and Lexa walked over to her coach, still sweaty from now.

“You needed to see me?” Lexa said a little out of breath. She had to rush for music class. They already practiced longer then they usually did. The coach always let them train longer when there was a game coming up.

“Yeah.” Her coach grabbed her shoulder and lead her to walk with him.

“How are your classes going?”

Lexa swallowed loudly.

“Fine I guess.”

The coach smiled and stopped walking.

“Mr. Collins told me you’ve skipped music class a few times.”

Lexa shrugged. “Last week I didn’t. I really want to do this now.”

The coach laughed out of disbelief and shook his head.

“You’re lucky I can’t miss you on the team. But this is your last chance. One more mistake and you’re out.”

Lexa nodded quickly.

Coach Pike smiled. “Good. I’m glad we’re clear about this. Now go shower. You look like you could use one.”

Lexa smiled back and ran back to the dressing room where Anya was waiting for her.

“Hey, what was that about?” Anya asked.

Lexa packed in her stuff and looked at the time on her phone. 6:45 p.m.

Shit. She was never going to make it on time.

“I’ll tell you later. I’ve got to go.” Lexa rushed.

“Oh yeah, music class.” Anya said a little smug.

Lexa rolled her eyes at the way Anya said it. She already regretted telling her friends.

“I’ll text you later.” Lexa said and rushed to her car.

Anya yelled something after she walked away but Lexa couldn’t hear what it was. She didn’t really care either. She had to rush for music class.

Lexa got in her car and pulled out her phone before driving away.

“Miss Griffin, Miss Griffin, where are you?” Lexa whispered to herself, scrolling to her text messages until she found her teacher’s name in her phone.

 

**Lexa 6:51 p.m.  
** _I’m sorry, baseball practice at school ended just now. I’m going to shower and I’ll be there as fast as I can. –Lexa_

Lexa drove home as fast as she could and showered as fast as she could and drove off to music class as fast as she could. She kept rushing and rushing. She didn’t want to be late. It was the only time Lexa got to spend her time properly on music. Yep, just music.

Lexa walked inside and saw the teacher’s name pop up on her screen.

 

**Miss Griffin 6:28 p.m.  
** _I was already wondering where you were… See you soon._

 

Lexa smiled and knocked on the door, but she realized that was probably stupid because nobody could hear her. Everyone was playing an instrument.

She opened the door and immediately caught the teacher’s eyes. Nobody else really turned to her, except for Monty who the teacher was talking to.

Lexa walked over to the drums and she didn’t realize she was a little out of breath. She saw the teacher walk up to her and grabbed herself a chair to sit next to Lexa.

“I’m sorry I’m late.” Lexa said, breathing loudly.

The teacher smiled softly. She probably saw how much out of breath Lexa was.

“Don’t worry about it. How did your practice go?”

Lexa was sure she was just being nice and gave her a grin.

“It was fine.” Lexa smiled back.

“Good. So, you want to start where we left off Sunday?” ****  
  
Lexa nodded and started practicing. The teacher stayed with her this time. Usually she would go sit down next to one of her other students.

But not this time. She watched Lexa carefully as she saw her struggling with the music notes, which made Lexa even more nervous.

Lexa sighed out of frustration.

“It’s okay, Lexa. Just relax.” She advised her and Lexa sighed again.

“I’ll never be ready for the concert.”

The teacher shook her head and moved a little closer to the student.

“You’ll be fine. If you don’t have to go anywhere after class I could give you some extra time to practice here.”

Lexa locked their eyes. Did she mean with or without herself?

“Like, you could give me some extra assistance like Sunday?” Lexa asked carefully.

The teacher nodded. “If you’d like.”

Of course she’d like. For the concert.

“Yeah. That’d be nice. The concert’s here in only two weeks.” Lexa breathed out.

“I was just talking to Monty about it. He told me the concert’s on a Friday, right?”

Lexa shrugged.

“I don’t know. Could be.”

Lexa hadn’t been to music class since last week. She didn’t know what Mr. Collins had told them about the concert.

In two weeks. On a Friday.

Lexa squinted and thought for a moment, the teacher still right next to her.

Lexa gasped and immediately stood up.

“Fuck.” She said and walked over to Monty who was playing guitar.

“Lexa-” The teacher raised her voice, confused as before.

“Monty, when is the concert? At what time?”

Monty jumped a little at hearing Lexa suddenly raise her voice to him.

“Erm, in two weeks on a Friday at seven p.m. Why?”

Lexa thought she would have a panic attack.

She slowly walked back to her teacher, ignoring Monty as she sat behind the drums again, staring at the instrument. She had no idea how she was going to do this. How was she able to attend this concert and her baseball game at once?

“Lexa, what is it?” The teacher asked her, not knowing what the hell was going on.

“I’m fucked.” She said emotionless.

Miss Griffin “shh’ed” her.

“What are you cursing for?” She almost whispered.

“I have an important baseball game at the same time as the concert.”

Lexa switched eyes to her teacher who had a serious look on her face.

“That’s very unfortunate.” Was all she said.

Lexa had no idea how she was going to do this. She was either going to fail music class and getting kicked out of the team, or she was going to get kicked out of the team because of not showing up for the finale.

Either way, Lexa was screwed.

Class past quickly and when all the students left, Miss Griffin came to sit next to Lexa, on the same chair as before. Lexa was still a little panicking from this situation.

“Look, I’m sure you can arrange something with one of your teachers.” Miss Griffin began.

Lexa scoffed. “Like what? Asking my coach to plan another day for the finale because I have to attend a concert? I don’t think so.”

The teacher looked worriedly at Lexa.

“It doesn’t matter now. I’ll get kicked out of my team anyway.”

“Just try to attend both. First the concert and then your game.”

“There’s no way-”

“I could even try to talk to your music teacher if you’d like. I could try to convince them to let you and Monty go first. If you can’t make it happen yourself at least.”

Lexa locked their eyes.

“I don’t know. I don’t think it’ll help.”

The teacher shrugged. “I could at least try.”

Lexa didn’t know what to do. She just wanted to go home.

“I know you’re working hard again for this. You’ve definitely improved, I told you that.”

Lexa shrugged. Like it mattered.

The teacher let out a little smile. “Don’t be so down. It will turn out fine, I’m sure.”

Lexa let out a sigh and nodded once.

The teacher laid a hand on her shoulder to get her attention and that sure did.

“Can I make you smile a little again by playing my song for you like I promised?”

Lexa already let out a silent laugh. She almost forgot about that.

“I see it’s already working.” The teacher said a little smug and stood up to grab her guitar.

Lexa’s eyes followed her and soon Lexa found herself sitting next to her teacher, only focusing on her.

The teacher cleared her throat. “Ready?”

Lexa nodded eagerly. She was surprised by how fast she would forget about her situation for a while.

The teacher started playing guitar. At the first chord Lexa already thought it sounded beautiful and she couldn’t keep her eyes off the teacher and how much she was enjoying playing her instrument.

The teacher started humming softly and then suddenly started singing.

_“Lexa’s a student in my music class and that’s not her favorite place to be,_

_But I know she works hard to be where she wants to be”_

The teacher let out a laugh for rhyming and Lexa’s smile grew wide from ear to ear and shook her head.

_“I still don’t have all the lyrics to this song but that’s okay,_

_‘Cause as long as Lexa thinks I do she sure wants to play_

_The drums”_

The teacher laughed again and ended the song with a difficult guitar play at the end.

Lexa was still smiling and she snorted when the teacher ended the song.

“I’m glad you’re at least smiling again.” The teacher said with a smile herself.

Lexa let out a silent laugh and rolled her eyes slightly. She was really enjoying the sound of the guitar and her teacher’s voice combined with her singing. She would really get caught up into her music, even when she was singing about Lexa.

“You’re a liar for telling me your song was almost finished.” She said with a smile.

The teacher shrugged.

“Maybe it is. Maybe I felt like freestyling a bit.”

The teacher gave her a grin and placed her guitar back on its place. She was definitely joking.

Lexa snorted again and remained silent. She watched her teacher sit down next to her again. She placed a hand on her shoulder again like it had become a habit. A habit Lexa couldn’t get used to if we were talking about how nervous she’d become every time the two touched.

“But seriously Lexa, it’s going to be okay. I think we should stop here for today ‘cause I don’t really think you’re in the mood for more practice. But I want you to text me if something’s wrong or if you do want to practice this week, okay?” The teacher said softly.

Lexa nodded. Why was she being so nice to her? She was just another student in her class.

“Thanks.” Lexa said with a grin.

The teacher nodded.

“Sure. Just promise me you won’t get drunk again because of this.”

Lexa’s eyes widened. Could she promise that?

“I guess.”

“No, not ‘I guess’. Text me if you want to talk about something. It’s better therapy than drinking, okay?”

Lexa smirked a little and inhaled deeply.

“Okay.”

“Good. Oh and you don’t have to put your name at the end of the text like you did this afternoon. I already have your number saved into my phone.”

Lexa’s mood lit up a bit. She already had her number saved into her phone.

“Okay.”

“Okay. Now go home. And I will expect a text this week.” The teacher smiled softly and Lexa nodded.

“Without my name at the end.”

The teacher smiled and nodded. They both stood up and together they left the building.

 

\----

 

“How was music class?” Indra asked after Lexa closed the front door behind her.

“It was fine.” She breathed out.

“You were running late today.”

Lexa sat down on the sofa next to her.

“I know. I had baseball practice at school.”

Indra nodded and remained silent. Lexa knew she wanted to make a comment like ‘baseball can’t ruin your time after school’ or ‘are you still playing baseball?’ like she usually did.

“So, there is this concert we have to give at school in two weeks on a Friday. It’s in front of parents and stuff and kinda important. And after that we’re playing the finale at this baseball competition. I don’t know if you want to come and watch or something.”

The older women squinted.

“In two weeks on a Friday?”

Lexa nodded.

“You know I always work on Fridays. But I’m sure you’ll do just fine without me.”

Lexa swallowed and didn’t care to look at the woman who raised her.

She stood up and walked upstairs.

“Yeah, I’m sure I’ll do just fine.” Lexa said in a low voice but her mom could still hear her.

Lexa threw herself on her bed and grabbed her phone.

She was this close to just start drinking and forget about everything. But she kind of promised the teacher she wouldn’t. She didn’t want to disappoint another person.

 

**Lexa 9:48 p.m.  
** _Sorry I’m bothering you again…_

Lexa let out a sigh and immediately her phone lit up.

 

**Miss Griffin 9:48 p.m.  
** _You’re not. Are you okay?_

**Lexa 9:49 p.m.  
** _Just told my mom about the concert and the game. She’s not gonna be there._

**Miss Griffin 9:50 p.m.  
** _I’m sorry to hear that… Why not?_

**Lexa 9:50 p.m.  
** _She’s got to work that day_

**Miss Griffin 9:51 p.m.  
** _Sounds like she’s not really setting her priorities straight. Have you tried talking to her about it?_

**Lexa 9:52 p.m.  
** _Not tonight, but I have several times. We always end up fighting and I’m not in the mood for that right now._

**Miss Griffin 9:54 p.m.  
** _Understandably…_

**Lexa 9:57 p.m.  
** _Yeah_

**Miss Griffin 9:59 p.m.  
** _I know it’s not the same but I would love to attend the concert and maybe even the game if you’d let me_

Lexa let out a sigh. It’s not exactly what she was trying to ask from her teacher but she couldn’t say no to this.

 

**Lexa 10:01 p.m.  
** _You don’t have to. You’ve probably got better things to do on a Friday night…_

**Miss Griffin 10:02 p.m.  
** _Honestly? Not really. Besides I enjoy seeing you play the drums. I’ll be there as your friend that night and not as your teacher, I promise no strict behavior from me ;-)_

Lexa smiled.

 

**Lexa 10:03 p.m.  
** _Okay, you’ve won me over. Thanks for everything tonight._

**Miss Griffin 10:04 p.m.  
** _No problem. Don’t hesitate to text me again_

**Lexa 10:04 p.m.  
** _I won’t_

**Miss Griffin 10:05 p.m.  
** _Oh and Lexa?_

**Lexa 10:05 p.m.  
**_Yeah?_ ****  
  


**Miss Griffin 10:05 p.m.  
** _Thanks for listening to me. Except for if you have a wine bottle in your hand right now…_

Another smile.

 

**Lexa 10:06 p.m.  
** _Nope. Just whiskey._

**Miss Griffin 10:06 p.m.  
** _No you don’t_

 

**Lexa 10:07 p.m.  
** _You really are spying on me…_

**Miss Griffin 10:07 p.m.  
** _I just know your sense of humor :-) Glad you’re not drinking. Good night, Lexa._

**Lexa 10:08 p.m.  
** _Thank god. I’m kinda glad too. Good night, Mrs. Griffin_


	9. Chapter 9

“You’re almost there, class. Don’t forget the concert is next week.” Mr. Collins said and excused everyone.

The bell rang and Lexa walked over to his desk where he was sitting. The teacher always looked so relaxed that Lexa didn’t really know how to gauge him.

He looked up at her, surprised to see her.

“Lexa, what can I do for you?” He said with a grin.

“Hi. I’ve-” She sighed. “I kind of got a problem. It’s about the concert.”

Mr. Collins crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, a doubting look on his face and his hair long and shiny as always. Lexa had no idea how to propose this. She hadn’t really have the greatest reputation of showing up to his classes in the beginning.

“See, you may know I’m in the school’s baseball team.” She started. “And we’ve got a big game coming up. The finales.”

The teacher didn’t move or say a word.

“And that’s in two weeks on a Friday. At 7 p.m.”

The teacher still didn’t move but he did speak now. He clutched his fingers and rested them in front of him on the desk.

“I don’t see the problem.”

Lexa frowned.

“I can’t attend both the concert and the game at the same time.”

“I know. And you won’t have to. You’ll have to choose. Baseball or your school career.”

Lexa raised both eyebrows.

“But it’s both my school career. I want to go to college and be a professional baseball player.”

The teacher laughed and stood up next to her, eye to eye.

“Let your kids’s dream go, Lexa. It’s time to grow up and choose you college wisely.”

Lexa frowned again.

“I’m sorry, I thought we were talking about my future, not yours.”

The teacher scoffed and laughed again.

“I’m sorry but I can’t help you.”

He packed his stuff and stood up. Lexa watched him leave the classroom in silence.

What an asshole. He didn’t even care. She hoped she could find a way to convince Coach Pike to help her out.

Lexa walked to baseball practice and changed into her baseball clothes. It was already Wednesday again and she had been extremely busy this week with biology, music class, baseball, her mom and her other exams coming up. She had no time to practice the drums outside of school this week even though she really wanted to.

“Hello, Ms. Woods! You ready?” The coach excitedly grabbed her by her shoulders and shook her. He jumped up and down, full of energy.

Too bad Lexa had to take away his good mood and disappoint him.

“Yeah, yeah.” She breathed out.

“You okay?” Her coach stopped jumping around.

Lexa sighed. Was she? It could be worse, right?

“I’m okay.”

“You don’t seem okay.” He sounded worried now. “Hey, what’s going on with my favorite team captain?”

Lexa gave him a tiny smirk.

“You only have one team captain.”

Coach Pike smiled and then laughed which earned a smile from Lexa as well.

“You’re not wrong.” He said. “But I know you. You’ve been in my team for almost three years. What’s on your mind?”

Lexa sighed and her smile disappeared.

“What if there was this concert for music class on a Friday evening at 7 but also a really important baseball game at the same time?” Lexa asked carefully.

The coach’s smile disappeared too.

“Music concert? No, no. I need you on the team that Friday.”

“I know. But then I’ll fail music class.”

The coach let out a deep sigh.

“Mr. Collins didn’t mention any of this concert.” He sighed out of frustration.

“Coach, I already tried to talk to him but he won’t listen to me-”

“Lexa-” He said lowly, not wanting anyone to hear him. “Do what you need to do, but if you choose for music class, you know I’ll need another team captain. And you know who that’ll be.” He walked away from her.

Damn Echo. She adjudged anyone but her to be the new team captain.

“But if I choose for baseball I’ll fail music class and get kicked out of your team anyway.” She raised her voice which caused everyone to look at her.

Her coach didn’t care to look back though.

Lexa looked unhappy the whole practice long. She missed almost every ball and she was way too tired to run. Her thoughts about this whole situation impacted her practice. Both Mr. Collins and Coach Pike couldn’t help her. It was really up to her. But it didn’t make any sense anymore to choose. Maybe she wouldn’t attend either.

Practice past and she and Anya walked to the dressing room together.

“You okay, Woods?” Anya asked after she realized Lexa hadn’t said a word in the last two hours.

Lexa shrugged.

“I guess you should go befriend Echo since she’s gonna be your new team captain.” She said and walked away, to her car, but Anya stopped her.

“What are you talking about?”

“I just want to be alone right now. I need some time to think about stuff.” She kept walking but Anya didn’t do as she was told.

“You don’t have be an asshole about it. I’m just here to help.” She frowned and turned Lexa around by grabbing her arm. “Talk to me.”

But Lexa didn’t want to. She didn’t feel like she was being an asshole either. She just needed some time alone.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Lexa got in her car, leaving Anya speechless. They always shared everything with each other, but right now Lexa didn’t feel like talking to anyone.

Lexa got home and threw herself on her bed. Her mom was nowhere to be found. That was weird, but she didn’t mind because they hadn’t really talked much since their conversation last week.

Lexa looked at the time. 7:30 p.m.

Lexa gasped and sat up straight, but then realized she still had to shower before driving to music class. That was probably not worth it. She was way too tired from everything.

She did text Miss Griffin.

**Lexa 7:32 p.m.  
** _Sorry, I’m not coming today. I’ll see you next week._

 

Lexa stared at the ceiling and sighed. She didn’t know what would cheer her up right now. She looked right next to her and looked at her mini fridge. Such a perfect time to-

Her phone buzzed before she could reach the fridge.

 

**Miss Griffin 7:33 p.m.  
** _Okay… Everything alright?_

Lexa sighed. She didn’t feel like bothering the teacher anymore with her problems.

 

**Lexa 7:34 p.m.  
** _Just a lot on my mind at the moment_

**Miss Griffin 7:34 p.m.  
**_You want me to call you?_ ****  
  


**Lexa 7:35 p.m.  
**_It’s a lot to talk about through the phone. So thanks but I’m okay._ ****  
  


**Miss Griffin 7:36 p.m.  
** _You want to meet up somewhere later?_

 

Lexa thought about it for a moment. Miss Griffin was really the only one at the moment who knew about her problems right now.

 

 **Lexa 7:38 p.m.**  
_Where?_  
  


**Miss Griffin 7:41 p.m.  
** _The park right next to the music building here?_

Lexa didn’t really feel like getting up and shower and everything. She was too tired and she almost didn’t go.

She also thought it was maybe was for the best if she took a walk outside later and showered. Maybe that would clear her mind.

 

**Lexa 7:43 p.m.  
** _I’ll be there._

 

**Miss Griffin 7:46 p.m.  
** _Good_

Lexa put down her phone and stared at her fridge. Maybe one drink wouldn’t be so bad?

She shook her head. She couldn’t think about that right now. It wasn’t necessary for her to drink. It wasn’t like she couldn’t live without it. Of course not. Lexa laid down into her bed again and closed her eyes for just a minute.

A little while later (and two drinks in) Lexa took a walk outside and walked straight to the park where Miss Griffin told her to. It was a twenty minute walk, but she didn’t mind.

She sat down there on a bench, waiting for her teacher to join her. She put on her hoodie and looked at her watch. 9:08 p.m.

Right when she looked back up, she saw her teacher walking towards her. She was struggling a little by taking steps in her heels in the grass, but she managed to join Lexa on the bench without falling. She greeted her with a smile, wearing tight jeans and an oversized sweater, which Lexa thought looked pretty cute on her.

“What is up with you and hoodies?” The teacher asked.

Lexa smirked and shrugged.

“They’re comfortable. What’s up with you and heels?”

“They’re absolutely not comfortable.” The teacher laughed which caused Lexa to smile. Maybe for the first time today.

After a moment of silence, the teacher put her hand on Lexa’s leg.

Lexa jumped which caused her to lock eyes with the teacher. The teacher wasn’t even embarrassed about staring right into her eyes.

“What happened today?” The teacher asked softly.

Lexa sighed. She didn’t want to think about it ever again. But she had to face it anyway.

“So, I asked my music teacher Mr. Collins to help me out with the concert but he refused. And then I asked my coach who refused to help me as well. I’m failing either music class or baseball and I’ll get kicked out of my team anyway. And then there’s my mom who hasn’t talked to me in almost a week. I’m pushing my friends away because I don’t want to talk about it and I’ve only had two drinks today which clearly isn’t enough.” Lexa almost said in one breath.

The teacher frowned worriedly, still her hand on Lexa’s leg.

“Okay, let’s start with the concert. High School Polis, right? I’ll talk to this Mr. Collins about that.”

Lexa locked their eyes again and scoffed.

“I don’t know why you could fix that for me. Even though I would be really grateful.”

“Music teacher to music teacher. I could at least try for you.”

Lexa sighed and stood up, forcing the teacher to take her hand back and then she stood up as well. She struggled a bit on her heels to stand next to Lexa.

“Now, only two drinks today? That’s not bad.”

Lexa scoffed.

“That’s not something to be proud of.”

“I think it is, Lexa.”

Probably the only positive thing Lexa had heard today.

Lexa walked away a bit further, trying to get all the air into her lungs.

“Why did you stop after those two drinks?”

“Because you told me to not become an alcoholic.” Lexa said honestly.

The teacher followed her around until she grabbed Lexa’s arm to hold her still.

“Stand still or I’ll fall.”

Lexa stood still indeed and nodded slightly. She actually froze because the teacher had a death grip on her arm. Her hand felt cold because it was pretty cold outside.

“I’m not encouraging you to keep drinking, but at least you stopped on time. That’s already a big step.” The teacher stepped closer to the student and pouted when Lexa still wasn’t smiling.

“I think I’m the one who needs a hug right now.” Lexa said with a tiny, tiny smirk.

The teacher laughed and awkwardly looked around her. Lexa wondered why the teacher suddenly got so awkward.

“Nobody’s gonna see us if that’s what you’re worried about.”

She heard the teacher laugh a little bit nervously.

“I’m- It’s just different. Because you’re basically my student. It’s weird if people see us.”

Lexa nodded and took a step back. It was clear the teacher didn’t want to do that.

She locked eyes with the teacher for a split second.

The older woman sighed. “I guess you really need one, don’t you?”

The teacher took a step closer to Lexa and didn’t hesitate anymore to embrace her.

Lexa put her arms around her and heard her teacher chuckle a bit when she rested her chin on Lexa’s shoulder. Lexa could smell the delicious scent of shampoo mixed with the teacher’s scent. It smelled fresh and clean.

They stood there for a while, way longer than necessary before the older woman finally broke their contact. Lexa wanted to protest but she didn’t anyway.

She met with Lexa’s eyes and could see she was smiling slightly.

“I’m glad you’re smiling a little again, ‘cause I wasn’t planning on freestyling again for you.” She laughed.

Lexa may or may not have laughed a bit too.

They stood in front of each other in silence. In the dark. Lexa finally felt a bit more relaxed. She didn’t think about her situation for a little while.

When the teacher let out a deep sigh.

“Lexa, you know you’re going to be fine, right?”

Lexa let out a silent laugh.

“Sure. You’re already doing more for me then you have to. I feel like I have to do something in return.”

The blonde shook her head.

“No, you don’t. Just focus on the important things right now. Not about repaying me.”

Lexa scoffed softly.

“I should probably walk back home.” Lexa proposed.

“Walk? You walked all the way to here?”

The teacher sighed and lead Lexa to her car, grabbing her arm.

“I’ll drop you off.” Was all she said.

Before Lexa had time to protest or really say anything else, the teacher already forced her into her car.

The teacher got into the car as well drove Lexa home. She parked the car in front of her house and looked at Lexa.

“You have to stop taking care of me.” Lexa said loud and clear.

The teacher frowned but then nodded.

“I’m not taking care of you. I’m pushing you into the right direction. You’re doing all the rest.”

Lexa laughed and shook her head.

“You’re way too good for my depressing, alcoholic self.” She scoffed but the teacher wasn’t smiling even a little bit.

It was true. Lexa felt like she was bothering the teacher too much. Lexa only thought about herself. She didn’t think about the teacher who probably had another million things on her mind that were way more important than Lexa.

 The older woman’s voice immediately changed. Way softer.

“I’m just a little bit worried about you.”

“You shouldn’t be. And you don’t have to solve my problems. I do appreciate you helping me but you don’t need someone like me to take care of. Just like my aunt doesn’t.”

The teacher had a sad expression on her face.

“If that’s what you really want.” She changed her voice again. Colder this time.

Lexa immediately regretted her decision of telling the teacher to back off but then again, the teacher had better things to do than helping out Lexa and saving her problems for her. She didn’t deserve that. Neither of them did.

“No, but it’s for the best.” Lexa opened the door and walked outside. She ducked a little to see her teacher through the open window.

“Thanks again for being there for me. But again, I don’t want to be a weight on your shoulders. You don’t deserve that.” Was the last thing Lexa said and she walked away to enter her house.

Lexa almost reached the front door when she heard a car door open. Lexa rolled her eyes slightly and turned around.

The teacher stood right in front of her right now, a worried look on her face again.

“Stop looking at me like that.” Lexa said and turned her head away.

The teacher let out a silent laugh.

“I’ll see you next week?” The teacher asked like nothing just happened.

Lexa nodded carefully but then shrugged.

“Baseball practice. I don’t know.”

The teacher nodded understandably.

“Well, just remember not to push the people away who try to help you. Just like you do to your friends.”

Lexa didn’t answer and immediately the teacher stepped in closer and put her arms around Lexa.

Lexa immediately melted into the teacher’s arms and let herself being wrapped up in the slightly smaller woman. There was the delicious scent again. Lexa held the teacher for a long while.

“You’re not worried people will see us?” Lexa asked seriously and the teacher laughed.

“Let’s not think about that right now. Let’s just talk about your arms. With arms like that, I’m sure your coach would never want to give you up.”

The teacher took a step back and smiled. Without saying another word she walked back to her car, forcing Lexa to stare at her until she drove away.

What did she just say? Did she compliment her? Did she try to make Lexa feel better? In any other way, Lexa was dazed by her teacher. This was probably the first time someone didn’t let her to push them away from herself.

 

\----

 

Lexa had been studying hard for her classes. Right now it was all about biology. She had been studying in her room for the last three hours. Which was definitely a record. Today in exactly one week she was going to have to choose between the concert or the game. But that was next week.

She heard a buzz. She looked at her phone that lit up.

 

**Miss Griffin 10:27 p.m.  
** _I didn’t know Mr. Collins was also an old fart like me._

 

Lexa gasped.

 

**Lexa 10:27 p.m.  
** _What???_

**Miss Griffin 10:28 p.m.  
** _Let’s just say I fixed you’re problem anyway. Because I’m stubborn like that._

Lexa let out a sigh but then a happy laugh.

 

**Lexa 10:28 p.m.  
** _What did you do? Why are you like this haha_

She didn’t feel like being annoyed right now. She was just happy the teacher said she fixed her biggest problem.

 

**Miss Griffin 10:29 p.m.  
** _We made an appointment by e-mail. I drove by your school today and explained the whole situation. Including how much of an hard worker you are_

Lexa couldn’t keep smiling.

 

**Lexa 10:30 p.m.** _  
What did he say??_

**Miss Griffin 10:31 p.m.  
** _He said you and Monty could go first and that you would start 5 minutes earlier. That was the only thing he could do for you._

 

Lexa screamed internally. She could hug the teacher forever. She would definitely have to rush over to the baseball game but at least she could make it.

 

One less problem already.

 

**Lexa 10:32 p.m.  
** _I don’t know how to express how thankful I am… you are literally my hero.  I owe you big time._

**Miss Griffin 10:34 p.m.  
** _:-) Good night Lexa._

 

 **Lexa 10:34 p.m.  
**_Good night Ms. Griffin :-)_ ****  
  



	10. Chapter 10

“You’re not going to the concert, right?”

Lexa locked eyes with Anya before hitting the next ball.

“I’ll have to. Otherwise Pike will kick me out.”

Anya sighed.

“But you’ll make it? To the game?”

“I hope so. I’ve got like two minutes to change into my baseball clothes.”

Anya nodded understandably.

“Why didn’t you tell me before? You shouldn’t keep things like this to yourself.”

Another hit.

“Good Miss Woods. Keep it up.” Coach Pike said.

Lexa nodded and gave him a smirk.

“Lexa?” Anya asked impatiently.

“Yeah, I’m sorry about that. You know I hate talking about my problems and feelings.”

Anya rolled her eyes.

“Whatever.”

Lexa didn’t know what else to tell her.

“I’m sorry, Anya. I’ll tell you next time.”

“That’s what you said after your music teacher’s situation too.”

Lexa locked their eyes and put her baseball bat right next to her on the ground.

She embraced Anya and Anya hesitated before she put her arms around her as well.

Lexa was feeling way too happy about this Friday and about seeing Miss Griffin later. She didn’t want to fight with Anya. Or anyone else.

“Yeah yeah.” Anya patted Lexa’s back. “That’s not gonna save you every single time.” She laughed a bit but Lexa heard she didn’t want to laugh. Lexa smiled back and let go of her.

“I know. But I am really sorry. I just had a lot on my mind. I promise to tell you everything from now on. Really.”

“Really?” Anya raised an eyebrow.

Lexa smiled. “Promise.”

“I hope you’re fucking right, Woods.”

Anya pushed Lexa away a little roughly and took her spot to hit the ball which made the Lexa laugh.

“What would I do without you?” Lexa said in all seriousness.

“Ew stop. Sentimental doesn’t suit you.”

Lexa laughed and shook her head. Just a few more minutes before she could drive off to music class. She was sure she couldn’t be any happier about seeing her teacher today. After her text message last Friday barely anything could make her unhappy again. Also she hadn’t seen the teacher in a week because she was studying for next week’s exams. She was practically dying to go to music class again and tell her teacher how thankful she was.

But Lexa had to start solving her own problems. She had to start facing them in the first place. Her teacher made her realize that her even more.

 

\----

 

Lexa walked into the classroom and smiled when she saw her teacher standing with her back at Lexa, looking at a poster. The older woman was wearing a tight black skirt again today with a light red blouse, without heels but sandals today, and still Lexa couldn’t keep her eyes off her. She stared at her for a while. She was allowed to, Lexa thought. Just not for too long. She forced herself to stop staring after a while.

“Good evening.” Lexa happily greeted. She slowly walked towards her teacher when she turned around to face her.

“Evening.” The teacher gave her a smirk.

Lexa was close to the teacher now and didn’t hesitate to put her arms around her which actually caught both of them by surprise.

“Sorry, I’m just really happy right now.” Lexa said and she earned a laugh by the teacher, hugging the student back.

The teacher was smaller today because she wasn’t wearing heals and so this time she couldn’t do anything but rest her head on Lexa’s chest. But she didn’t seem to mind. She patted Lexa back like the other time and then Lexa let her go, still smiling.

“You’re welcome.” The teacher said and gave her a soft smile. That beautiful smile. “You’re early by the way.”

Lexa nodded. “I left a little earlier from practice today. I wanted to thank you properly.”

The teacher tilted her head softly and smirked.

“You didn’t have to.”

“I did. And I promise that I’ll fix my own problems from now on.”

The teacher let out a chuckle. “Sometimes you can’t fix everything by yourself.”

Lexa smiled again. Why did she always know what to say? Like she had an answer for everything Lexa needed to hear. Like she understood Lexa completely. Miss Griffin was the whole package.

“Anyway I was hoping you’d be in for lunch or something sometime. It’s all on me, I owe you. And I don’t really mind spending time with you.” She said.

Lexa owed her.

The teacher raised her eyebrows and started laughing.

“Is that normal at your High School? Owing people lunch?” The teacher let out a laugh again.

Lexa frowned in confusion.

“I don’t know? Why?”

“Because Finn told me that I owed him a lunch too for fixing this for you.”

Lexa shook her head out of confusion again.

“Finn?”

“I mean Mr. Collins.”

Lexa’s eyes widened.

“He asked you out?”

The teacher frowned.

“Wait, what? Did you?”

Lexa’s eyes widened.

“No. I mean, I just owe you. You don’t owe Mr. Collins… I mean Finn anything.”

Wait. Did she agree to this date with Finn?

“Okay. Well, maybe we could go together then. All three of us.” The teacher said naïve.

Absolutely not. Lexa tried not to respond to that ridiculous offer.

“So you said yes to him?”

“Why does that matter?”

“Because he’s taking advantage of the situation I’ve put you in. Now I get why you could make it happen and I couldn’t. He just wanted a date in return.” Lexa scoffed.

The teacher started laughing before she realized Lexa was serious.

“Wait, you really think it’s a date? I don’t really know him like you do.”

Did this mean her teacher was into guys as well?

“If it would be a date, would you agree to it?”

The teacher shrugged. “I don’t know yet. We did exchange numbers.”

Lexa sighed. She was so happy two minutes ago.

“You don’t think I should do it?”

Lexa sighed again. Of course she thought it was a bad idea. But only because she knew her teacher deserved better than that asshole. Also maybe a little bit because Lexa knew it was meant as a date and Lexa maybe kind of wanted to spend time with the older woman like that.

But what was she supposed to say? She had to be mature about this as well.

“I don’t know.”

The teacher nodded understandably.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be asking my student for dating advice.” She scoffed.

Lexa laughed nervously.

“Don’t worry. And I’m just saying, it’s your decision. But I think you deserve way better than him. Just like you deserved better than Niylah.”

The teacher nodded and sighed.

“I wish I would meet someone who wasn’t that much of an asshole. Unfortunately I seem to attract those people a lot.”

Lexa nodded understandably. She felt like it was addressed to herself as well. There was no denying anymore that Lexa didn’t feel attracted to her teacher. And that it was probably wrong in so many ways.

Lexa softly put her hand on the teacher’s arm which made the teacher look up to her.

“I’m sorry.”

The teacher stared at Lexa for a while before she let out a silent laugh.

“It’s not your fault.”

Lexa kept her mouth shut for a while and she pulled back her hand.

“So, you excited for Friday?” The teacher then asked.

Lexa shrugged.

“I’m not sure. I’m excited for the baseball game but kind of nervous for the concert.”

“Really?”

Lexa nodded.

“You’ll be fine. You’re getting pretty good. I’d say you were ready for Friday.” A smile curved the teacher’s pink lips. So soft and pretty.

Lexa smirked. “I hope so.”

Lexa wasn’t sure if asking the teacher again for having lunch with her would be a good idea or not.

“Will you still be there, or not?”

The blonde nodded. “Of course.”

Lexa nodded. “And what about that lunch?”

The blonde laughed nervously.

“I don’t really know.”

“You don’t want to?”

The teacher shrugged.

“I do.”

“So?”

Lexa wasn’t giving up. She was so close for hearing her teacher to say yes.

“So nothing.” The teacher continued.

“You do want to meet up, but you’re saying no?”

Another nervous laugh from the blonde.

“I do want to meet up but we shouldn’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re a student. And I’m your teacher. People will see us.”

“We can get lunch and eat it up at my place or yours. Nobody will see us.”

“I don’t know Lexa.”

Lexa was still not giving up. She probably should because the teacher wasn’t wrong. It was risky for  them to hang out.

“That’s a yes.”

The older woman let out a laugh and then remained silent.

“Maybe.”

“You know I don’t forget things easily.”

“Yes, I learned that the hard way.” The teacher smiled. Again that smile.

Lexa revealed her smile as well. She was excited but also extremely nervous about her teacher showing up for her this Friday. But she didn’t show any of it.

The first student came in and Lexa was a little annoyed the girl ruined their conversation but she would see the teacher on Friday and she had a ‘maybe’ for lunch from the teacher which Lexa was going to turn into a yes hopefully soon.

She just had to convince her and make her forget about Finn. This Friday would be the perfect time for that.

 

\----

 

Tomorrow was the big day. First the concert, then the baseball game (hopefully), Lexa still wasn’t a 100% sure. She told Finn she would attend the concert and her coach Pike that she would attend the game. So it was pretty nerve-racking.

Right now it was Thursday evening and Lexa was just about to study for her test. Yes, study. In the evening. Not the usual for Lexa but she had to right now. She worked so hard for being in the team, she couldn’t back out now.

She also knew the whole song. Inside and out. She had been practicing in both of her music classes and Miss Griffin helped her out so well. She owed her the world. If only she’d say yes to her lunch.

Suddenly Indra entered the house. Lexa was just about to go upstairs but she stopped when her mom didn’t even say hi to her.”

“You’re not going to say hi?”

Indra looked up at her.

“You talk? I’m sorry, I didn’t know you could.”

Lexa sighed annoyed.

“Like you were so talkative this week.”

Her mom sat down on the couch and Lexa did too. They remained silent for a while. Lexa wasn’t sure what to say. She wanted to say so many things at once, but she was so tired. Tired of fighting. She didn’t want to fight anymore. She wanted to start facing her problems and fix them. That’s something Miss Griffin taught her.

“I’ve got to go to work.” Her mom said.

“Now? But you just got home from work.”

Her mom let out a sigh and pointed to the roof above them.

“You see that? I can’t pay that if I have just one single job.”

Lexa suddenly felt guilty. She didn’t know her mom had two jobs. She also didn’t know why she didn’t notice.

“Since when do you have two jobs?”

“I think it’s been two weeks now.”

Lexa’s stomach felt nauseous all of a sudden. She didn’t know.

“You’re going to kill yourself with two jobs. You shouldn’t be doing that.”

Indra scoffed. “Sure, we could also live under a bridge on the streets.”

Lexa looked down to her feet.

“I could help you at making an income. I could go look for a job.”

Her mom smiled softly at her. The first time in over a week.

“That’s okay. We’ll be fine.”

Lexa nodded. “Just let me know when you need help. Please.”

Indra nodded and stood up. “Don’t worry.” She gave Lexa a kiss on her forehead and left.

They hadn’t talked their things out but at least they talked. It was the first time this week. Lexa would talk to her next time they would see each other at home, when she had more time.

Lexa walked upstairs and grabbed her textbooks. She threw herself on her bed and started studying. She got distracted a few times thinking about tomorrow. About this whole situation. About seeing Miss Griffin tomorrow, probably in heels like she was used to see her teacher in. Lexa forced herself to think about something else when her phone buzzed.

**Miss Griffin 7:47 p.m.  
** _Are you ready for tomorrow?_

 

Lexa smiled wide when she saw her teacher’s name popping up her screen.

 

 **Lexa 7:48 p.m.  
** _Yes, but I’m not sure the world is ready for me._

**Miss Griffin 7:48 p.m.  
** _You’re lucky I know you’re kidding_

**Lexa 7:49 p.m.  
** _Or else what?_

**Miss Griffin 7:49 p.m.  
** _Or else I wouldn’t have lunch with you_

Lexa laughed and kept smiling. Did she just-?

 

 **Lexa 7:50 p.m.  
** _You just agreed to my offer_

**Miss Griffin 7:51 p.m.  
** _Maybe._

**Lexa 7:51 p.m.  
** _That was a yes for sure_

**Miss Griffin 7:52 p.m.  
** _I texted you because I wanted to wish you good luck for tomorrow_

**Lexa 7:53 p.m.  
** _Ok first of all you’re changing the conversation and secondly, won’t you be able to wish me good luck tomorrow? Or did you just change your mind about coming?_

Lexa didn’t want to know the answer. She didn’t know why she was insecure about her teacher not coming to see her at school.

 

 **Miss Griffin 7:55 p.m.  
** _Fair point. But I’m not blowing you off._

**Lexa 7:56 p.m.  
** _Are we talking about the concert or about the lunch?_

**Miss Griffin 7:58 p.m.  
** _:-) I’ll see you tomorrow. Goodnight for later, Lexa_

**Lexa 8:00 p.m.  
** _You know I won’t be able to sleep in peace without an answer_

**Miss Griffin 8:01 p.m.  
** _I’ll tell you tomorrow._

**Lexa 8:01 p.m.  
** _I still won’t forget it. Good night for later Miss Griffin._


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oops, my longest chapter till now.

Today was the day. Lexa was feeling incredibly nervous for later. She had music class right now at school until the concert would start. It had been a tiringly long day and all she wanted was to go home and sleep. She was sure she would sleep like a little baby. She was exhausted.

But she still had a long way to go. First the concert, then the baseball game and after that a party. It didn’t matter if they would win or lose, the party had been already planned by everyone at school. It was going to be huge.

“For someone who’s been going to music class for four years, you sure can’t do much.” Finn said as he walked past Lexa who was practicing the drums.

Lexa felt nervous all of a sudden. Not because of him but because of his words. What if Lexa would fail this class after all? What if she would make a mistake tonight?

“Thanks.” Was all she said. She wasn’t going to let her teacher get into her head. Not today.

“That wasn’t really a compliment. Which means that your other music teacher isn’t really doing her job well enough.”

Did he just offend Miss Griffin? Did he just-

“You met her?” Lexa swallowed back her words. She didn’t want to say what was really on her mind. She didn’t want to be rude to the teacher who had to give her a grade at the end of the day.

Finn let out a laugh and nodded. “I sure did.”

He sure did? What did he mean? Why did he say it like that? Lexa squinted her eyes.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Her teacher scoffed. “She’ll be here tonight, right?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

Finn walked away before Lexa had the chance to say anything. Why did she have such a bad feeling about this.

Lexa let out an exhausting sigh. She looked at her phone. Her screen lit up but she hadn’t noticed she got a few text messages including from Miss Griffin a while ago.

 

**Miss Griffin 4:57 p.m.  
** _How’s it going over there?_

Lexa smiled at her phone. She couldn’t believe the teacher thought about her and texted her.

 

**Lexa 5:37 p.m.  
** _Alright I guess. I am missing a music expert around me to help me out though…_

**Miss Griffin 5:49 p.m.  
** _Finn’s not there?_

**Lexa 5:50 p.m.  
** _I thought I typed ‘expert’._

**Miss Griffin 5:50 p.m.  
** _Ha ha… Then you still have Monty_

Lexa smiled again.

 

**Lexa 5:53 p.m.  
** _I’ll see you later, right?_

**Miss Griffin 5:58 p.m.  
** _6:45?_

**Lexa 5:59 p.m.  
** _That’s the one. Monty and I will start at 6:55._

**Miss Griffin 5:59 p.m.  
** _I’ll be there to support you two!_

**Lexa 6:00 p.m.  
** _As a friend, right?_

**Miss Griffin 6:00 p.m.  
** _You remembered that part. Yes, I won’t call you out on your mistakes today._

**Lexa 6:01 p.m.  
** _So it’s cool if I call you by your first name for today?_

**Miss Griffin 6:03 p.m.  
** _Haha that might be a little too much maybe?_

**Lexa 6:04 p.m.  
** _I don’t call my friends by their last name though._

She did.

 

**Miss Griffin 6:05 p.m.  
** _Then I’ll be the first one ;-) I’ll see you later_

Lexa smiled and shook her head in disbelief.

 

**Lexa 6:06 p.m.  
** _You’re no fun. See you in a few_

 

Lexa put her phone away. She had practiced enough. Monty was stressing out all the time and that made Lexa incredibly nervous. She was trying not to stress out like that.

Lexa and her class went to the gym at school, where there was a stage since today. They had the chance to practice there a bit which seemed to stress out Monty even more. Lexa was still remaining her calm. One of them had to.

“Monty, could you please sit down?” Lexa breathed out.

“I’m nervous.”

“Really? I couldn’t tell.”

“Really?” Monty asked surprised.

Lexa let out a laugh and stood up to grab Monty by his shoulders.

“People from a hundred miles away can tell. Just sit down and breath, okay?”

Monty’s eyes were widened all the time. He did as he was told and sat down.

Lexa laughed a bit. The poor guy.

“You’ll be fine. We both will be fine. Relax.” She continued.

Monty only nodded and kept breathing through his nose and mouth.

They both stood on the stage, waiting for their turn when Lexa noticed a few people entering the gym already. It was almost time but Miss Griffin was nowhere to find.

Lexa let out a sigh and checked her phone. Nothing.

Lexa looked one last time from the stage to the entrance of the gym and it didn’t take her long before her eyes were drawn to a blonde woman in heels, searching around her. She was wearing a red, short jumpsuit and black high heels with some red lipstick and Lexa thought she looked so beautiful. Lexa smiled and immediately got off the stage and walked towards her.

She told herself not to give the teacher a hug right now. That would look weird to others in public, even though it crossed her mind for one second that she didn’t care about others.

The teacher turned around and saw Lexa walking towards her. She smiled when she saw her but then Finn got to stand in-between them. Lexa started walking slowly and went to stand right next to the older male teacher. Miss Griffin smiled and greeted her, even though she was having a conversation with her other teacher.

Lexa stood there, smiling dumbly. Staring at the stunning blonde in front of her.

“Are you ready? I’m sure you’ll kill it up there.” Miss Griffin said excitedly.

Lexa enjoyed the fact that she ignored Finn for a second before his ego started talking again.

“Absolutely. Lexa’s great. She’s improved a lot.”

Lexa almost rolled her eyes. Just a few minutes ago he told her she sucked at playing the drums.

All Lexa did was smirk, her hands in her pockets and remained calm.

“Thanks. I really hope so.”

“Lexa, why erm- why don’t you go prepare yourself. You’ll be up in two minutes.” He laughed a bit nervously. It was probably the effect the blonde had on him. Lexa knew how he felt.

“Break a leg.” Miss Griffin smiled.

Lexa nodded once thankfully. She didn’t want to leave. She didn’t want to leave the teacher behind with Finn. What if he would ask her out again? What if she agreed to their date? This was all Lexa’s fault anyway. She put Miss Griffin in this position.

Lexa nodded again after lingering around for two seconds longer then she intended and got up on stage with Monty.

Almost the whole audience sat down and Lexa calculated there were almost a hundred parents and others. Lexa felt a bit nervous when she saw Miss Griffin sitting in the audience. She smiled once but then Lexa remembered it was dark and she probably couldn’t see her.

It was exactly 6:55 p.m. now and they had to start playing right now. The game would start in five minutes.

Then Monty suddenly started playing guitar and later Lexa came in with the drums. The song started off slowly until the end where Monty killed his guitar solo and Lexa kept drumming. She was so focused on getting every note right that she didn’t even look for one second into the audience. But that didn’t matter, because Lexa hit every single note right. It went amazing.

Practice did pay off after all.

The song suddenly ended sooner than she thought, even though there was nothing different about it.

They both received a big applause and Monty was smiling wide, ear to ear.

After a few seconds the others came up stage and Lexa ran off to the exit where her teacher was standing right now.

“You were amazing. Now go. I’ll see you there.” Miss Griffin whispered excitedly when Lexa ran into her. She smiled and kept running.

She changed into her baseball clothes as fast as she could and ran on the field to her coach.

“Woods!” He yelled. “Where the hell were you?”

“I’m sorry coach. I’m here.” She said out of breath.

The players were almost in position.

Her coach sighed. “I shouldn’t even let you play right now. But go. Take Echo’s place.”

Lexa smiled and ran on the field to take Echo’s place. Which Echo wasn’t happy about obviously. Lexa couldn’t really blame her either.

Lexa was still out of breath but it was her turn to hit the ball. She took position and when she looked to her left she saw Miss Griffin standing there in the audience, pretty close to her. She was watching her and Lexa felt even more nervous than before.

Lexa tried not to get distracted by her teacher and focused. All the nerves and the teacher and just everything made Lexa feel so hot. She was still catching her breath and processing that she had just played the drums in front of a whole audience.

She suddenly felt it. She looked down her pants and cursed silently. Why now? Lexa was trying to cover it up but her pants were pretty tight. She wasn’t the smallest either. Lexa cursed again and tried not to be obvious about it. Especially with her teacher to her left.

The whole game was like a blur because it went so fast. Lexa calmed down after a while and was only showing for like a short few minutes, but she still was worried people had seen it.

But they won. That was all that mattered for Lexa right now.

She celebrated a while with her team, hugging everyone before she noticed her teacher still standing in the audience. Lexa saw her standing in her short jumpsuit, her arms crossed. She must be cold and Lexa felt a little guilty.

She walked towards the teacher, being all sweaty and dirty from the grass. The teacher greeted her with a smile.

“Congratulations.” She said happily.

Lexa nodded and smiled. “Thanks.”

“I didn’t know you were the team’s captain. That was pretty impressive. You must be tired.”

Lexa nodded, she was still out of breath.

“You must be cold.” Lexa breathed out.

The teacher laughed a little.

“Yes, and that’s my own fault.”

“Wait here.” Lexa told her and ran to grab her warm baseball jacket with her name on it.

She handed the teacher her jacket.

“Here. I didn’t use it today so it doesn’t smell. I hope.” She said.

The teacher laughed a little.

“Oh god, thank you. You sure you don’t need it yourself?” She said desperately.

Lexa shook her head as she watched her teacher put on her way too oversized jacket and thought she looked absolutely cute in it. She was wearing HER jacket.

“It suits you.” Lexa laughed.  

The teacher laughed as well.

“Okay now. At least it’s warm.” She said laughing.

Lexa nodded.

“So, there is this party at my friend’s house now that we’ve won. You want to come along?”

Her teacher looked down to her feet and laughed awkwardly.

“If you want. I understand if you want to go home.” Lexa added quickly. She really wanted her teacher to come with her and spend some time with her. Tonight had been crazy and stressful. She wanted some alone time with her.

The teacher traced Lexa’s tight pants before looking up into her eyes.

“I don’t know. I probably shouldn’t.”

Lexa nodded understandably. She should probably walk away now by herself. It would be for the best. But something in her couldn’t resist trying again.

“But you want to?”

“I might.”

“You know you won’t be the only adult there. Many people will be at the party. Not just from school or the baseball team.”

“I really shouldn’t.”

“Okay.” Lexa pouted a little which caused the teacher to smile. “You’ll be missing the greatest party of the year though.” Lexa said with a smirk.

“I’m not missing anything.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow.

“So you’ll come?”

The teacher let out a sigh before answering.

“Please? I want to celebrate this with the people who’ve helped me get this far.”

The teacher smiled and shook her head.

“And there will be many people?” The blonde asked.

“Not just from school.”

The teacher sighed again.

“Why not, we should celebrate this successful evening. Just for a few minutes if you don’t mind. I am pretty tired.”

Lexa revealed her wide smile. She couldn’t believe she just convinced her teacher to come with her.

“I wish I could convince you to have lunch with me as well.”

The teacher laughed.

“Maybe you already did.”

Lexa smiled dumbly. Maybe she already did.

Lexa quickly showered under one minute and then she and her teacher drove to her friend’s house, to the party. Lexa had gotten a couple dozen of texts where she was at. They missed her at the party. But Lexa was taking her time with the teacher. They were almost there.

“I can’t introduce you as my teacher at the party so I’m going to need to say your first name.” Lexa said.

The teacher scoffed. “You’re good at this.”

Lexa smiled and the teacher let out an annoyed sigh.

“Clarke. Just call me Clarke for tonight.”

Lexa smiled again.

“Clarke it is.”

When they entered Lexa’s friend’s house everyone woo-ed her. Lexa smiled at everyone and a few people came to hug and congratulate her, like they always did.

Lexa made her teacher follow her to the garden, where there weren’t so many drunk people and they sat down there next to each other on the couch.

“This is crazy.” The blonde said laughing. “So many people.”

“I told you.”

Lexa stared at her teacher wearing her oversized jacket and smiled.

She noticed and smiled back. “What?”

Lexa shook her head.

“Nothing. You want a drink?”

“Sure. Some coke would be fine.”

Lexa nodded. “I’ll have a coke as well. Be right back.”

Lexa came back after two minutes with drinks and saw her teacher being surrounded with Lexa’s two best friends. She made room for herself and sat down next to the teacher again which caused everyone to greet her happily.

“So I see you’ve met Clarke?” Lexa asked her friends. She loved saying the teacher’s first name out loud. It rolled way better over her tongue than ‘Miss Griffin’.

“How could we not? She’s wearing your jacket.” Raven said.

Her two best friends were already pretty wasted. Lexa realized how stupid it looked now that she was sober.

“I was pretty cold. Lexa was so nice to lend it out to me.” Her teacher said.

“Well, you’re not the only girl who’s said that.” Raven laughed, followed by Anya.

Lexa widened her eyes and looked away embarrassedly. Her friends didn’t know it was her music teacher of course. They had never seen her before. She wasn’t planning on telling them now. They were drunk.

“So I’ve heard.” Was all the teacher said but Lexa could swear her voice sounded a little off.

Lexa didn’t want her teacher to think bad about her. They had to stop talking about her like that. She hadn’t been like that in weeks.

She felt the teacher’s eyes on her. Her friends were embarrassing her like they always did, but this time she actually minded.

They remained silent for a while when Raven gasped.

“Guess who’s here?” She asked. “Echo’s niece.” She mouthed.

Lexa shrugged.

“So?”

“So you know what to do, champ.” Raven continued and hit her shoulder gently.

“I don’t think so.”

Raven pouted. “I think you’re too sober for this.”

Lexa locked eyes with her teacher and gave her a smirk. The teacher smirked back, knowing what she meant.

“I’m trying to.” Lexa said and both her friends gasped.

“You’re kidding.” Anya said and turned to the blonde. “She’s kidding.”

The teacher laughed. “I don’t think she is.”

“I’m not, Clarke.” Lexa let out a silent laugh. She just loved saying her name.

Raven started talking to the teacher. “God, did you convince her to do that? I’m sure I would’ve done the same if you’d ask m-”

“Okay, that’s enough. Thanks, Reyes. Maybe you should try to stay sober too. You’ll be less of an asshole.”

Raven laughed and she didn’t seem to care because she suddenly walked away to someone she knew to greet them. Anya yelled something and then followed her best friend.

“See what I have to deal with when I’m sober?” Lexa asked.

“See what you’ll look like when you’re not sober?” The teacher asked.

Lexa sighed. “I know.”

The teacher gave her a grin.

“You had fun at the concert and the game?” Lexa asked.

The teacher nodded. “I was really proud of you playing the drums up there. And it was nice to you see you in your element on the field. You’re really good at baseball. Everyone seems to adore you.”

Lexa smiled foolishly. She was proud or her. “Thanks.”

Lexa didn’t want to ask it but she did it anyway. Like she had no control over her tongue.

“So did Finn say anything interesting to you?”

The blonde shrugged. “Not really. Just that we should have lunch or dinner sometime.”

Lexa nodded. She knew it.

“And what did you say?”

The teacher sighed. “I said we’ll see. Only to not have to deal with it.”

Lexa nodded understandably. “But you want to?”

“Not really. I figured I just want to enjoy being single for a while.”

Lexa nodded again. She wasn’t sure whether to be happy or not. She figured she was. At least the teacher wasn’t with Finn right now.

“So I was glad I could escape to your baseball game.” The teacher smiled.

Lexa revealed her smile. “You’re welcome.”

The teacher smiled again and yawned.

“I think I’m going home.” The blonde said.

“Okay. You’re not having fun?” Lexa asked softly.

“I’m just tired.”

“Me too.” Lexa nodded.

“But you’re staying?”

“For a little while I think. They expect me to since I’m the team’s captain.”

“So many obligations.” The teacher said lax.

Lexa smiled. “It’s alright. I’ll walk with you to your car.” She didn’t give her time to answer. Lexa wanted this. She had been wanting to hold her teacher all evening long so bad. From the moment she saw her.

Her teacher followed Lexa outside through the mass straight to her car where they stood still for a while. She stared at her teacher in her short clothes with Lexa’s big jacket on.

“Thanks for letting me come with you tonight. I hope it makes up a little for the fact your mom couldn’t be here.”

Lexa laughed. “Thanks for coming. And my mom would never attend a party with me anyway.”

The teacher laughed too. “Right. I’ll see you Wednesday right? Or are you going to blow me off now that you’re successful without me?”

Lexa let out another laugh. “I would never.”

“Good. I’ll see you then.”

“Wait.” Lexa began and paused for a while. “Can I hug you?” She said a bit awkwardly.

The teacher let out a chuckle. “Sure. I didn’t think you would ask so nicely.”

Lexa stepped in closer and put her strong arms around her.

“I can be nice sometimes.” She said while the teacher hugged her back. Closer than other times before.

The teacher rested her chin on the student’s shoulder and laughed. The older woman had put on some perfume and wow she smelled good.

Lexa could stay here forever. She wouldn’t mind one bit. As long as it was Clarke being in her arms.

The teacher took a step back and got in the car.

Lexa put her hands in her pockets.

“Drive home safe.”

“I will.”

Lexa watched her drive away. All she wanted was to go home as well. Actually she just wanted to be in the car right now with her teacher.

But she had to stay for at least a little while. She didn’t feel the need to drink anymore and she couldn’t really explain why, but it didn’t matter.

Tomorrow was a new day. Probably without a hangover. It was a new day to text her teacher. To ask her out for lunch.

And ask her jacket back.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the delay, I was really busy... Hope you still enjoy!

**Lexa 10:04 a.m.  
** _Good morning_

**Miss Griffin 10:09 a.m.  
** _Is it? You’re not hungover?_

**Lexa 10:10 a.m.  
** _I know, I’m proud of myself too_

**Miss Griffin 10:10 a.m.  
** _Just when I thought I couldn’t get any more proud…_

**Lexa 10:11 a.m.  
** _:-) I think this deserves a nice long lunch as celebration._

**Miss Griffin 10:13 a.m.  
** _You’re still putting much effort in that even though I already told you I’d have lunch with you…_

**Lexa 10:15 a.m.  
** _But at home?_

**Miss Griffin 10:16 a.m.  
** _If you don’t mind_

**Lexa 10:16 a.m.  
** _Absolutely not. Is your place okay? My mom’s here…_

**Miss Griffin 10:16 a.m.  
** _Sure, no problem._

**Lexa 10:16 a.m.  
** _Is later today a good time? I could buy us some pizza?_

**Miss Griffin 10:17 a.m.  
** _Sure. Peperoni extra cheese for me please :-)_

**Lexa 10:17 a.m.  
**_Your place with pizza it is_ ****  
  


**Miss Griffin 10:17 a.m.  
** _I’m already looking forward to seeing the pizza._

**Lexa 10:18 a.m.  
** _Thanks, I’m looking forward to seeing you too._

**Miss Griffin 10:19 a.m.  
** _You too. With the pizza._

**Lexa 10:18 a.m.  
** _Yeah yeah your point was clear. See you in a few_

\----

 

The instructions for her teacher’s apartment weren’t that difficult. Lexa had picked up some pizza on her way to the older woman and calmly walked to the fourth floor.

Two knocks was all it took before her teacher opened the door and met her with her beautiful smile, like always. Something Lexa couldn’t get enough of.

The teacher was wearing some tight jeans, this time no heels but just socks, an oversized grey sweater and her hair was up in a not so messy bun. Lexa thought she looked so, so pretty and she thought it was amazing to see her teacher feel so comfortable like this around her.

“Welcome.” The teacher said as she let Lexa in.

Lexa looked around her. The apartment was kind of small but looked new. Very clean as well.

“Pizza.” The teacher said hungrily as she held out her hands to grab one of the boxes.

Lexa laughingly shook her head as she watched her teacher sit down and open the pizza box.

“Come sit down. I’m starving.” The blonde said wide eyed.

Lexa did as she was told and opened the other pizza box.

They started eating in silence. Lexa didn’t really know what to talk about. It was kind of weird seeing the teacher in her comfort zone outside of class. They could talk about a million things but right now she was enjoying her pizza and the teacher’s presence.

After a while the older woman spoke. “You sure eat a lot for being so skinny.”

Lexa scoffed. “I prefer the term muscly.”

“Oh, excuse me.” The teacher laughed. “I guess you kind of are.”

Lexa smiled. “I love pizza.”

“Amen to that.” The teacher said while continued eating.

Lexa let out a laugh by how hungry the teacher looked when she ate. It was adorable.

They finished eating and threw away the boxes. They both sat down on the couch right next to each other. They didn’t really know what to do next so the teacher started talking.

“So, was it fun last night? With all of your girls.” She said with a tiny smile.

Lexa shook her head. “Sorry about that. My friends were drunk. They didn’t know what they were saying.”

“Don’t be sorry. You told me yourself that you like to hook up with girls, right?”

Lexa’s heart started speeding up. This was not what she wanted to be famous for.

“I haven’t done that in a long time.”

“Why?”

Lexa didn’t know the answer to that so she just shrugged.

“Because you’re becoming an old fart, too?” The teacher tried to lighten up the mood.

It worked because Lexa laughed.

“I guess I already am.”

The teacher laughed.

“Oh well, you do seem a little older than eighteen anyway.”

“I do?” Lexa raised an eyebrow. She knew because many people had told her before, but she just wanted to hear it from her teacher.

The teacher nodded. “Especially your looks.”

“Oh, so from the inside I’m like a young fart.” Lexa laughed.

“I don’t think that expression exist, but sure.” She laughed back. ”I don’t know. You’re just younger than I am. You like to go out and have fun, while I’d rather spend my evening at home, drinking tea. Oh god that sounds so lame.” The teacher laughed again.

Lexa shook her head. “It doesn’t. I can appreciate a nice, long evening at home, too.”

The teacher revealed her smile. “Lexa Woods drinks tea?” She asked all confused.

“I mean, if I have to.” Lexa said smug. She just said her whole name. She remembered. “You look a bit younger, too by the way. I mean, you could easily pass for like a 24 year old.”

“Oh great, almost three years younger than I actually am.”

Lexa shrugged. “I’ll let you do the math. I’m terrible at it.”

The teacher laughed again and Lexa swore she moved closer to her because their shoulders were almost touching now.

“Sometimes age doesn’t even matter.” Lexa continued and the teacher locked their eyes.

“You’re right. Sometimes it doesn’t.”

“Like when?” Lexa asked her.

“Like… Like when teacher and student are having a nice time together even though the teacher is almost ten years older.” She joked.

But Lexa didn’t see it as a joke. She felt like the teacher meant some of it.

“I’m sorry, did you say a nice time? I mean, I don’t mean to brag but I think you’re having a great time with this student.” Lexa went along with the joking part. It’s what she always did when she didn’t know what to say.

“Right. I mean, the pizza was really great.” The teacher said in all seriousness which caused Lexa to laugh again.

The teacher spoke again. “But you’re right. You make it easy for me to talk about things. Like, we’ve kind of been through the same things and you show interest and that’s nice. Like with Niylah or Finn. My dad and my drinking problem from a few years ago.”

Silence.

“I could still text my friends about it but it’s still different because they’re far away from me at the moment. And I know it’s not such a good thing to text you or spend time with you because I’m your teacher.”

Lexa only nodded. Right now she didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t even think about something funny to say so she just listened carefully.

“But you seem to make me forget that I’m your teacher when you’re around me. I don’t know if that’s a good thing but it’s nice to have a friend around here.”

Lexa just nodded again and smiled.

“I can’t believe I just said that out loud. Is it weird that I called you my friend?”

Lexa smiled wide. “No. I think the same way.”

No she didn’t. Well, sort of.

The teacher smiled.

“So, is it weird if we would be seen in public together eating pizza or whatever?” Lexa asked a little nervously but she tried not to show.

The teacher for sure moved in close now so that their shoulders were touching and Lexa shivered slightly at the contact.

“I still think it’s a bit weird for people. And maybe I won’t be taken seriously anymore if people knew. Nothing personal.”

Lexa shrugged.

“I get it. You have a job to fulfil.”

The teacher nodded.

“But I’m cool with hanging out like this. And like I told you, we probably look kind of the same age so I don’t think strangers would notice our age difference.” Lexa said calmly.

“Not strangers. Maybe your friends are wondering who I am.”

“I didn’t tell them.”

“I know.”

The teacher let out a deep sigh and when they both remained silent for a little while, she lifted her legs up on the couch and carefully rested her head on Lexa’s shoulder. Lexa froze again for a while and didn’t notice she was holding in her breath this whole time. She then let out a sigh and made herself a bit comfortable as well, not so stiff.

She didn’t know whether to put her arm around the teacher or not but figured she wanted to so she did it. And she didn’t regret it because her teacher only moved in closer to her body.

Lexa was feeling really hot with all her nerves and the teacher half on top of her (not exactly but that’s how it felt) that she tried her best not to start sweating. Or something worse that had something to do with her southern area.

Lexa tried not to think about it and gently caressed the teacher’s arm with her fingers.

The older woman didn’t seem to mind because she wasn’t protesting. They stayed there watching tv in silence and again Lexa loved that the teacher felt so comfortable around.

“Clarke?” She whispered.

“O god, you’re still calling me that?”

“I mean, shouldn’t I? You just called me your friend.”

“Fair point. Just don’t call me that in front of the other students, please.”

Lexa nodded. “Fair point.”

“Why did you call me again?”

“Right. Because I need to go to the bathroom.” She said a little awkwardly.

The teacher immediately lifted her head from Lexa’s shoulder and laughed shyly. Lexa already missed the warmth of the teacher’s body.

“Sure. At the end of the hallway on your left.”

Lexa stood up and went to the bathroom. She had been holding it in for a long time now. After she came back she sat down to the blonde again and took the same position as earlier, not even feeling weird or awkward about it. And neither did the teacher. She fitted into Lexa’s arms like she was made for it.

“Clarke?” They suddenly heard and both girls stood up straight, keeping their distance from each other like they were doing something illegally.

Clarke stood up and walked to the front door.

“Hey. I didn’t expect you so early here today.” The blonde said.

Lexa stood up as well and slowly followed the teacher who was now hugging another woman.

“Yeah, well. It wasn’t as fun as I expected so I left earlier.”

The teacher nodded and the other woman noticed Lexa standing behind her now.

“Oh, I didn’t know we had a guest.”

Lexa walked towards them and held out her hand.

“I’m Lexa.”

They shook hands.

“Octavia. Pleasure to meet you.”

Lexa smiled politely. “Pleasure’s all mine.”

“Okay, wow. Should I leave?”

The blonde shook her head and widened her eyes.

“No, no. We were just watching some tv and we ate some pizza.” Clarke told her and Lexa was just slightly disappointed they weren’t alone anymore.

“Okay great, because I didn’t feel like leaving again.” Octavia said frustrated. Lexa noticed a few tattoo’s on her arms but looked away before she noticed.

“So Lexa, what brings you here?” The brunette said as she grabbed herself a drink.

Who on earth was she?

“Pizza.”

Octavia laughed. “Ah, you can always make Clarke happy with pizza.”

Lexa smiled and nodded.

“Where do you know each other from?”

Lexa and her teacher quickly gave each other a glare and Lexa remained her best poker face.

“We’ve been friends for a while. We met at this party where people were celebrating winning a baseball competition.”

Clarke let out a soft chuckle.

“Clarke? At a sports thing? That’s new.”

“What about you?” Lexa quickly asked.

“Uh, I live here. Since a week though.”

The teacher quickly locked eyes with Lexa and gave her a soft smile. For no reason.

“I have known Octavia’s brother Bellamy for like three years, but never met his sister because she was always travelling around. And O still is, she just needs a place to stay for a few months here and I offered her a room here.”

Lexa nodded understandably.

“Which I’m very thankful for.” Octavia put her arm around Clarke for two seconds and smiled before letting go of her again and sat down on the couch.

“What kind of 50’s movie is this?” She yelled from the living room which caused the teacher and Lexa to smile. Lexa hadn’t even notice what movie they were watching. She wasn’t paying attention anyway.

Both girls sat down on the couch. Octavia had planted her butt in the middle so there was nothing else left than to sit on each of her side.

 

\----

 

“Where did you come from?” Indra asked as soon as Lexa closed the door behind her.

Lexa jumped a little. “Nowhere.”

Her mom sighed. “You’re not going to tell me?”

Lexa shrugged. “Does that matter?”

“Lexa!” Her mom yelled but then remained calm. “Let’s behave. The both of us. I’m really tired of fighting with you while you’re the only family member I have left.”

Lexa’s eyes widened. She did not expect her mom to get all emotional all of a sudden.

Lexa sat down next to her mom and immediately placed her arms around her.

“I’m tired, too.”

They pulled back from the hug and Lexa saw her mom was on the edge of crying.

“Let’s try to be nice to each other. No secret things.” Indra said.

Lexa nodded. She felt bad for her mom. She didn’t deserve that after everything she had done for Lexa. She took care of her since she was all alone.

“How was your game?”

“We won.”

Indra smiled now and hugged Lexa again. “Oh honey that is so great. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there. I will try next time.”

Lexa nodded. She needed to hear that. “It’s okay. I know you’re doing the best you can.”

Her mom nodded and smiled.

“How was your work?”

Indra sighed. “It was a tough day. But at least I made more money.”

Lexa nodded and felt guilty again. Guilty for not helping her mom.

“So, were you at a friend’s house just now?”

Lexa looked her mom in the eyes. How could she lie to those sad eyes?

“Yes.”

“Who?”

Lexa swallowed nervously.

“Just a girl from music class.”

She wasn’t really lying.

Her mom raised both eyebrows.

“Just a girl?”

Lexa laughed nervously.

“She is a good friend.”

“How good?”

Lexa laughed awkwardly and looked away.

“Are you dating?”

“Oh god, mom, please.” She breathed out.

“Okay, okay. You don’t need to tell me everything.”

Silence.

“But you like her?”

“Mom, please.” Lexa laughed nervously again.

“Okay, okay. I know enough.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’ve been your mother since you were ten. I know you.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and stood up to end this conversation.

“Just be safe. Or doesn’t she know about your southern situation?”

“Please don’t ever call it that again.” Lexa paused. “And no, she doesn’t.”

Indra nodded. “Do you think she will mind?”

Lexa shrugged. “I don’t know. But we’re just friends, mom.”

Indra smiled again. “I’m sure if she likes you too she won’t mind. Just tell me when you’re dating her.”

“Oh my god.” Lexa mumbled and walked upstairs.

“And make sure you are being safe.” Her mom yelled at her with a slight laugh.

Lexa didn’t want to hear this from her mother. _God._ Although she was glad their conversation didn’t end in a fight this time.

She threw herself on the bed and heard her phone buzz.

 

**Miss Griffin 4:02 p.m.  
** _Oops… Forgot to give you your jacket back…_

Lexa smiled.

 

**Lexa 4:03 p.m.  
** _Keep it. I’ve got like seven other jackets just like that._

**Miss Griffin 4:04 p.m.  
** _No, no. It’s yours. You should have it back._

**Lexa 4:04 p.m.  
** _It’s a gift from a friend to a friend. Just keep it. It’s fine_

**Miss Griffin 4:06 p.m.  
** _It does smell nice…_

Lexa smiled wide.

 

**Lexa 4:07 p.m.  
** _Seems like a great gift then._

**Miss Griffin 4:09 p.m.  
** _You are so full of yourself… Let me know if you need it back someday._

**Lexa 4:09 p.m.  
**_What’s new? And I won’t. It’s all yours._ **  
  
Miss Griffin 4:11 p.m.  
**_Good. ‘Cause I’m wearing it already._ ****  
  



	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay alright. I think we all know what happens after this chapter. But first, enjoy this one!
> 
> PS: the very last paragraph is from Clarke's point of view but I think you'll notice.

“Lexa, may I have a word with you please?” Mr. Collins said after the bell rang.

Lexa nodded and waited until everyone left when she walked over to the teacher.

Finn sighed deeply. “I don’t know how to tell you this so I’m just going to throw it out there. You didn’t pass music class for this semester.”

Lexa frowned and her eyes widened at the same time. Was he serious?

“No offense but, why not?”

“You’re just not on the same level as the rest of the students. And you need to be for when we’re going to this concert in LA in a few weeks.”

“Concert? But I literally just started drumming not even a month ago. Of course I’m not on the same level.”

“A month ago?” The teacher almost sounded impressed but Lexa knew it wouldn’t help.

“I’m sorry, you’ll have to do it over and throw a mini concert. Just for me of course.”

“Wait, am I the only one who didn’t pass?”

Finn nodded.

Lexa felt her rage run through her body. She knew from the beginning Finn didn’t like her.

“Maybe if you had a better music teacher-”

“It’s not my fault Cla- Miss Griffin didn’t stay with you the whole evening.” Lexa immediately regretted saying that.

Finn scoffed and then laughed.

“How do you know about that?”

Lexa really regretted telling him and swallowed her words back. What she actually wanted to say.

“Guessed it.”

Finn stood up now.

“Well, I know she really wanted you to pass.” He whispered. “And I really want something from her as well.”

Lexa burst out into laughter out of disbelief. Basically Lexa didn’t pass because Clarke didn’t go out with Finn. Unbelievable.

“And you’re a grown man? A teacher? You can’t be serious.” Lexa only said but she wanted to say so much more. She was boiling from the inside so she just walked away to baseball practice.

 

\----

 

“Excellent job, Ms. Woods.” Her coach said impressed. “I think your muscles are finally really showing what they’re able to do.” He laughed.

But Lexa wasn’t laughing. She was just hitting away her rage with baseball.

“You okay?” Anya heard what their coach had said and stood next to Lexa now.

Lexa nodded and hit another ball furiously again.

“What happened to ‘I’ll tell you anything from now on, An’?” She said imitating Lexa’s voice.

Lexa turned around and sighed. She was right.

“I didn’t pass fucking music class.”

“What? Wait, which one?”

“Here at school. With Mr. Collins.”

“Man that sucks. Now what?”

“I’ll have to do it over but I’ll never pass anyway.”

“Don’t be like that. You’ve got some time left to practice.”

Lexa shook her head and sighed. Should she tell her? Yes she should. Everyone should know what kind of immature asshole he is.

“Long story short: Collins wanted to go out with Miss Griffin and she rejected him so I’m the one paying for it.”

Anya’s eyes widened but Lexa continued hitting the baseballs like nothing just happened.

“Oh my god. Does he think he’s at a playground or something?”

Lexa turned around. “Exactly!” She yelled a bit too loud which scared herself even. “It’s just not fair. She’s got nothing to do with my classes at school. It doesn’t make any sense.”

“Maybe she should go on a date with him after all?”

Lexa turned around and had an almost devilish look in her eyes.

“Or not.” Anya immediately said and almost had a scared look on her face.

Lexa was just not in the mood for jokes right now, which was rare. But she would get kicked out of the baseball team after all. After all the time and effort she’s been through. It all just sucked.

 

\----

 

Lexa got in her car after baseball practice and went home. 6:47 p.m. Lexa showered long and took her time to eat something but didn’t notice she got a few text messages. After eating she unlocked her phone.

 

**Miss Griffin 7:32 p.m.  
** _Could you come over please?_

**Miss Griffin 8:01 p.m.  
** _Maybe like, now?_

****  
Miss Griffin 8:21 p.m.  
_Never min. So sorry._

Lexa jumped up and in one motion she ran out the door. How could she not have seen the texts before?

 

**Lexa 8:49 p.m.  
** _I’m on my way_

Was all she texted and raced to the teacher’s apartment.

Lexa parked her car and rushed inside the building. Her hair was still wet from the shower but she didn’t care right now. She just wanted to get to her teacher. She knocked on the teacher’s door a few times before she finally opened it.

The older woman seemed different. A little bit messy hair, red eyes and an oversized sweater, but that wasn’t anything that scared Lexa off.

Lexa did have a worried look on her face and they didn’t say anything when Lexa walked in.

After a moment of silence the teacher slowly walked to Lexa. Lexa froze and stood still, a little out of breath when the teacher melted into her arms. Lexa immediately unfroze and placed her arms around her, holding her tight. The teacher smelled different today. Not smelly, just another scent around her. Something familiar.

“You okay?” Lexa asked softly while rubbing her teacher’s back a little.

The teacher shrugged slightly and broke their contact.

“I’m so sorry, I literally just saw your text.”

“It’s okay. I shouldn’t have texted you.” She said a little low. She had a different tone in her voice and Lexa noticed.

“Why? What’s wrong?”

Lexa was confused about what was happening at the moment. She saw a mess on the table behind the teacher. The table was filled with food and drinks. And bottles. Empty bottles of wine.

The teacher grabbed Lexa’s hand gently and Lexa almost had a heart attack. She stumbled when she led the student to the sofa where they both sat down next to each other.

“I don’t know why I texted you.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know.”

“Have you been drinking?” Lexa asked seriously.

The teacher shrugged and looked down at her feet.

“Clarke-”

“Yeah. So?”

“So? Weren’t you the one who taught me not to drink so much?”

The teacher scoffed and then whined silently.

“I’m so sorry.” She whined.

Lexa looked at the broken woman in front of her. She hated seeing her like this. This time Lexa couldn’t help but take her teacher in her arms and they both remained silent for a long time. Snuggling each other. She could feel the teacher felt comfortable like this because she totally melted into Lexa’s body again and started playing with her wet curly hair.

“What happened?” Lexa asked again when backing off from the hug.

She shrugged sadly. “It’s been 11 years today.”

“What?” Lexa asked confused but then it hit her when she did the math.

“Your dad?” Lexa almost whispered and Clarke nodded.

“Yes. You ever miss your parents much?”

Lexa swallowed nervously. “Of course. Every day actually.”

“Me too.”

Lexa nodded understandably.

“You ever feel like you don’t deserve all the good things life throws at you?”

Lexa scoffed. Their conversation was about to get serious she thought.

“Sure. But why do you feel like that?”

The teacher shrugged. “I killed my dad.”

Lexa frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I killed him. If he hadn’t paid for my college he would have got the money to save himself. To pay for his medicine.” She was almost crying again. “I never knew he saved money for me. If I did I would’ve never accepted it. He knew it was my dream to study music.”

“You can’t think like that, Clarke. This is not your fault. Your dad wanted the best for you.”

The blonde shrugged slightly and let out a desperate sigh.

“I can’t forgive myself. I can’t help it. On days like this I drink up everything I see.”

“I get that. It’s hard.”

Lexa looked almost amazed to see her like this. She always thought the teacher had everything figured out because she always acted so strong and mature. Lexa easily forgot by seeing the teacher’s strength that she also had problems like this.

The blonde leaned into Lexa’s body for the third time and placed her head on her chest now. Lexa embraced her with strong arms again and gently ran her fingers down the teacher’s back.

“I shouldn’t have called you.” She repeated while snuggling further into the student.

Lexa sighed and shook her head again. Clarke was far gone.

“Stop saying that. You can always text me or call me or whatever. I don’t mind.” Lexa said in her softest voice.

“I shouldn’t have. I really shouldn’t have.”

Lexa held the teacher tight for a second.

“Why? We’re friends.”

The teacher scoffed. “Why? ‘Cause I could’ve called or texted or whatever Octavia. Or anyone.”

“But you didn’t.”

“No. I guess I hoped you’d understand better. Which is stupid because who drinks until they’re drunk and asks their friend to understand?” The teacher stumbled a few times on her own words.

“I do understand, Clarke.”

The teacher backed off from Lexa which left her disappointed.

“I’m a mess.”

“At least you’re a pretty mess.” Lexa smiled softly. She tried to lighten up the teacher’s mood and she wasn’t even lying. Clarke probably wouldn’t even remember she said that to her tomorrow.

The teacher scoffed. “You mean petty.”

Lexa let out a laugh.

“You’re still really sharp for being so drunk.”

The teacher laughed dumbly. Yes, Lexa made her laugh.

“Yes.”

Lexa didn’t feel like talking about her own problems right now. It could wait. She wanted to be there for her teacher first.

“You’re gonna be fine.” Lexa said as she laid her warm hand on the teacher’s leg.

The teacher very slowly looked from Lexa’s hand to Lexa’s eyes and lips and Lexa didn’t know why but it made her very nervous.

A quick sigh followed and she looked away from the student.

“I do this every year without even wanting to. I just really miss him.” The teacher continued.

Lexa nodded. She knew exactly how she felt.

“Can I get you anything? Food? Some water? How about some pizza? Peperoni extra cheese?”

The teacher shook her head eagerly.

“Don’t leave.”

Lexa smirked softly and stood up. Clarke wanted her to stay. She wanted her to be here with her.

“I’m not.”

The teacher’s desperate eyes followed Lexa everywhere. Lexa only put the bottles that weren’t empty in order again and cleaned up all the rest.

When Lexa came back she let herself fall on the couch again and even before her butt touched the couch, the older woman was already in her arms again. Needing the student’s support. Lexa had learned today that the teacher was very clingy when being drunk or sad. Not that she minded at all.

Lexa made tiny circles with her fingers on the teacher’s waist. It served as support Lexa figured. Lexa wanted to be like her safe haven. She wanted her to be able to tell her everything that was bothering her.

“I’m tired.” The teacher suddenly said.

Lexa looked at her watch. 10:17 p.m.

“You should get some sleep.”

“Can I stay here like this?”

Lexa smiled slightly.

“You’ll be less sore tomorrow if you’d sleep laying down. In bed.” Lexa said obvious.

The teacher yawned.

“How did you get here?”

Lexa shook her head. Clarke wasn’t really herself at the moment.

“I’ll tell you tomorrow.” Lexa helped the teacher stand up by still holding her waist and pulling her up.

“Which one’s your room?” Lexa asked as she walked Clarke to the hallway. Clarke pointed at the first room on their right and Lexa entered it, guiding the older woman inside with her.

The room was small as well but very colorful and well sorted. Lexa liked her room. It was very much Clarke.

The teacher laid down in her bed herself and Lexa bowed down to her so she could hear her better.

“Goodnight. I’ll see you tomorrow at music class.”

The teacher hummed and already had her eyes closed. There was no sound coming out of her teacher anymore. Only a loud breathing sound that made Lexa smile.

Lexa stayed there for only two more minutes to make sure the teacher was asleep. It was really satisfying seeing her teacher sleep. She looked so beautifully peaceful.

 

\----

 

**Lexa 10:36 p.m.  
** _Morning. Hope you slept well after last night._

**Miss Griffin 11:23 p.m.  
** _Morning. I kinda did. I just woke up_

**Lexa 11:26 p.m.  
** _I’m glad_

**Miss Griffin 11:29 p.m.  
** _Listen… I remember bits and pieces about yesterday. Just wanted to say thank you for coming over_

**Lexa 11:30 p.m.  
** _No problem_

**Miss Griffin 11:32 p.m.  
** _I’ll see you later at music class._

**Lexa 11:34 p.m.  
** _Yes you will_

\----

 

Lexa was about to enter the building like fifteen minutes earlier before class.

Lexa slowly walked in, her eyes searching for her teacher when they accidentally locked them.

“Hey.” Lexa said and walked towards the teacher.

“Hi, Lexa. Please take a seat.”

Lexa gave her a funny look but did as she was told.

“How are you feeling?”

The teacher walked up to Lexa. She was wearing a tight green skirt with a black blouse and her hair over her shoulder and Lexa couldn’t keep her eyes from her. She looked so gorgeous.

Lexa stood up to give the teacher a hug and she loved that the teacher didn’t even hesitate to do the same. She loved not having to ask for a hug. She loved it was their new way of greeting each other.

“So. I guess you still drink sometimes then?” Lexa started.

“Please tell me you didn’t come here earlier to teach me a lesson.” There was no joking tone in her voice.

“No. I’m here to play the drums.” Lexa raised an eyebrow.

The teacher let out a laugh out of disbelief and Lexa took a step forward to the teacher. Lexa thought about how clingy and touchy the teacher was last night and Lexa wanted more of that. She wanted to touch her and she didn’t know if that was okay. But she did it anyway.

Lexa hold out her arms and carefully placed her hands around the teacher’s waist. Clarke smiled slightly and then also took a hesitating step forward to be closer to the student. The older woman laid her hands on Lexa’s arms and caressed them carefully.

“Thank you for coming over again and listen to me.” The teacher said husk.

Lexa smiled. “No problem. I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

The teacher nodded and took another step forward. Lexa locked their eyes. They were so close to each other. All Lexa had to do was lean into her and their lips would connect. And god, she really wanted to. She wanted to taste those beautiful lips.

“I don’t know what we’re doing.” The teacher whispered after a while.

“Me neither. But I like this.” Lexa admitted.

The teacher shook her head and gently pinched Lexa’s arm.

“I shouldn’t be doing this. WE shouldn’t be doing things like this. You’re my student-”

“You are so pretty.” Lexa couldn’t bite her tongue anymore. She had to say it. She waited patiently until Clarke would say something back.

The teacher slightly chuckled. “So you meant that last night.”

Lexa smiled and pulled Clarke just a little bit closer so that their foreheads were touching now. Lexa didn’t think the teacher would remember she called her pretty.

“I did. And you really are.”

“Anyone could walk in right now. Class is almost starting.”

Lexa nodded and locked their eyes again. Clarke’s eyes were so beautifully blue. She could watch them forever.

“We should wait after class.” Lexa said.

“Wait for what?”

Lexa’s heart was pounding fast. She didn’t really know why she said that. She didn’t have a good answer. The teacher took a step back, letting go of the student and sighed.

“Snuggling?” Lexa dumbly said.

The teacher laughed a little. “Because that’s what we were doing.”

“Yes.”

Clarke nodded.

Lexa nodded back nervously and then let out a laugh. The teacher kept staring at her and she smiled.

“And you’re really pretty, too.” Her teacher said right before the first few students walked in.

 

\----

 

Clarke spend the whole time during class trying to get her mind off of Lexa. She tried not to think about the soft way she had touched her an hour ago. Or her warm body temperature against hers. Or her strong arms around her waist. Her comforting voice talking to her-

“Miss Griffin, could you listen to my rhythm please? I think I’m doing something wrong.” Monty said as Clarke got snapped back into reality.

She cleared her throat. “Of course.”

She listened to Monty and didn’t mean to lock eyes with Lexa on her left who was smirking at her, but she couldn’t help it.

She shook her head. This was wrong. She was her student. She just turned eighteen. She couldn’t think the way she was thinking about her.

“Wasn’t good?” Monty asked, reacting to Clarke shaking her head.

“No, no. It was good. Let’s uh- let’s hear it again.” She didn’t listen to it the first time.

She didn’t know what she was doing with the student. She didn’t know what Lexa was doing to her either. It all felt so good to be with her but at the same time so wrong.

Monty finished his song and Clarke smiled. He was always such a show off.

“You’ve got nothing to worry about, Monty. That was great.”

Monty smiled and thanked her.

“Miss Griffin, could you help me too for a second?” She heard a voice say from her left and she knew exactly who’s voice it was.

“Sure.” She said through her teeth. She was trying NOT to think about her. Lexa only made it so hard for her. Especially when she was around.

She sat down next to Lexa who was smiling at her again and Clarke couldn’t do anything else than to smile back. It was contagious.

“I think I need help with some rhythm thing as well.”

“You’re so full of shit.” Clarke laughed and Lexa did, too. She looked so tough but all she really did was being adorably cute when she smiled. Clarke shook her head again. Don’t think about that, she told herself.

“I do need to tell you something. Because I talked to Finn today and I didn’t pass his class.” The younger girl said.

Clarke’s expression changed, frowning.

“What? Are you serious? Why?”

Clarke could see Lexa hesitated a bit but then she shrugged.

“I just have to do it over.”

Clarke nodded.

“I could talk to him.”

“No.” Lexa immediately replied. “No thank you.” She added and smiled. “I’ll be just fine. Don’t worry about me.”

“Miss Griffin, I don’t know what these signs mean.” She heard behind her, interrupting their conversation. It was another student. A girl.

Clarke smiled at Lexa shortly before turning around. “We’ll talk later.” She told her and walked away with the girl.

She wondered how only talking to Lexa could already lighten up her mood and make her feel so happy. Maybe only by looking at her. Maybe her tall height and her muscly arms were already enough for doing that.

And for the thousandth time today, she shook away her thoughts.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaah!
> 
> This next chapter picks up right after the last one.
> 
> The last part is in Clarke's point of view again.

All of the students left the classroom except for Lexa. The teacher was packing in her stuff and Lexa noticed she was about to leave.

“You’re in a rush?” Lexa asked while standing in front of the teacher, about two steps away.

“Kind of.”

“Okay.” Lexa sounded disappointed and a bit confused. Lexa didn’t know she was in a hurry.

They remained silent for a while when the teacher let out a sigh and let her stuff drop on the floor.

“Not really.” The teacher confessed.

“Okay?” Lexa got confused again and it showed.

“I just don’t really know what you’re doing to me.”

Lexa widened her eyes. “I mean, I guess we could talk another time-” Lexa started but then her stomach got filled with nerves when the teacher took two steps towards her.

“Maybe I don’t want to talk.” The teacher said low, husky. “Maybe that’s the problem.”

“Why is that the problem?” Lexa said nervously.

The teacher laughed slightly and shrugged.

“Because I’m afraid I won’t be able to control myself around you.” She sighed.

Lexa shivered at those words. Hearing her teacher say that felt like such a relieve. Like they were on the same page somehow.

“Then don’t. I can’t promise you either to control myself.” Lexa encouraged.

“You’re eighteen. You are my student.”

“I hate it when you say that. I know I am. So what?”

“So what? Lexa, I’m not losing my job because of you.”

“But I want more than this. Do you want to wait until I’m not your student anymore? I’m quitting music class in a few months. You know that.” ”

The teacher let out a sigh.

“I don’t want to wait that long.” Clarke said quietly.

Lexa frowned. “Wait. You’re doing it again. You’ve been giving me so many mixed signals. I’m so confused every time.”

The teacher gave her a guilty grin and took a step back. Lexa immediately regretted telling her.

“I didn’t mean to scare you off.” Lexa said and took a step forward and the teacher stayed right where she was, letting Lexa come closer.

“I’m scared. Scared of myself. Of my own thoughts.”

“I am scared, too. It’s not like I’ve ever done this before with any other teacher.”

“I guess not. But I get it. It’s your eager hormones talking.”

Lexa shook her head confused.

“My hormones talking? Clarke, no.” This was so much more than just hormones.

“I know, it’s kind of exciting, right? A much older woman. A teacher. And I’m making a fool of myself by falling for your charms.”

Lexa shook her head again. Lexa put her arms around the teacher’s waist pulling her closer. They almost left off exactly where they were two hours ago.

“That’s not it. I promise. You’re making me feel things.” Lexa admitted and the teacher softly smirked.

“I don’t know. Maybe these things are different for you than for any other girl. You confuse your feelings for lust.”

Lexa frowned. “What do you mean?”

Clarke sighed and suddenly ran her fingers through Lexa’s hair behind her neck.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but I saw something in your pants at your baseball game. You’re not like other girls.”

Lexa’s eyes widened and she considered it for a mere second. What if the teacher was right? What if she was confusing herself with these feelings?

“So I guess it was that obvious.” Lexa already had a feeling someone saw. It just had to be Clarke.

The teacher nodded.

“Do you mind?” Lexa asked almost shyly.

The teacher smiled and took a tiny step closer.

“No. But I know you always hook up with many girls. And I don’t want to be the next one on your list.”

Lexa cursed herself.

“I told you before that I haven’t done that in a long time. I haven’t felt the need to, just like drinking. You are doing that to me.”

Lexa didn’t think she could ever talk about her feelings so easily. But she just did. She didn’t care if it sounded desperate or flattering or anything. She just wanted her teacher to know.

“Don’t say that. I’m not doing anything. We can’t.”

“But I mean it.”

The teacher started laughing desperately. Lexa was so close again to connecting their lips and she almost did when the teacher stopped her on time right before their lips touched.

“Don’t.”

“Please.”

“Are you begging me?”

Lexa nodded. She wasn’t even slightly ashamed.

“Go home, Lexa, before I do anything stupid.”

“Mixed signals again. You do want this, don’t you?”

The teacher took a big step back, leaving Lexa cold without her body against hers.

“Is this clear enough for you?”

Lexa nodded carefully. She still wasn’t convinced obviously but she slowly grabbed her stuff. She watched her teacher standing in front of her, waiting for her to leave.

“Can I still hug you goodbye?” Lexa asked gently.

Clarke hesitated but then nodded.

Lexa put her bag on the floor again and embraced the older but slightly tinier woman. She felt her teacher holding her tight, like she wasn’t going to let go for a long while. And they both didn’t. Lexa felt like they stood there forever. She sure could stay here forever.

“I like hugging you.” Lexa said.

The teacher let out a laugh.

“I like hugging you, too.”

The teacher was the one who took a tiny step back while still holding each other. She revealed her beautiful smile again which made Lexa wonder why she hadn’t kissed her already. She was drawn to this woman in every way and she wondered how angry the teacher would become if she would kiss her.

Lexa pulled her teacher gently closer to her and almost closed the gap between their bodies. The teacher showed her dark eyes and Lexa didn’t really know what it meant again. She wasn’t protesting this time which confused Lexa even more. Was it just being caught up in the moment?

Lexa didn’t know what was happening right now but she didn’t want it to stop. The teacher made her addicted to her and Lexa kept wanting more of her. Even though this could ruin their friendship or teacher student relationship, she still wanted to take the chance.

Lexa had to lean in just a tiny little bit.

“Lexa, we should go home. Let me go.”

Lexa didn’t think twice anymore before she desperately captured Clarke’s lips with hers and this time the teacher didn’t have time to stop Lexa. She felt like Clarke didn’t want to stop her either, because from the moment their lips touched the older woman softened and relaxed completely against her. Lexa moaned softly when Clarke sucked her bottom lip into her mouth

Clarke fully let herself go by kissing Lexa harder and Lexa never wanted to kiss anyone else again because she didn’t think anyone could make her feel the way the older woman did in this moment. Lexa’s movements were a tiny bit shakily but confident as she claimed the older woman’s lips over again. Lexa smirked in between the kiss as she tried chasing the teacher’s lips every second, trying to catch up with her and she somehow did.

Lexa laid a hand on Clarke’s cheek and the other one on her waist, following by two hands on Clarke’s waist and wanting to explore more of Clarke’s body. Clarke wouldn’t let go of her bottom lip and two cold hands were placed on Lexa’s cheeks pulling her closer which was the only thing that Lexa could manage to think about right now.

They both opened their mouth and Clarke was the one who desperately collided their tongues and Lexa whimpered, wanting to taste Clarke in every way possible. It felt so welcoming and Lexa started losing herself. She didn’t care because she couldn’t remember the last time she had a kiss like this. She couldn’t remember anything at the moment. She couldn’t even think clear. The teacher had her head spinning out of control. She was a great kisser, better than anyone Lexa had kissed before.

Lexa gently pushed the teacher backwards when the teacher wrapped her hands around Lexa’s neck and they kind of smoothly kept walking till they reached the desk, not breaking the kiss for a second. The teacher leaned against her desk and Lexa leaned her body fully against the teacher, her hands on her back. Lexa’s legs felt weak and she tried her hardest to keep standing. She didn’t know how but she managed to do it.

Lexa let her hands guide themselves to Clarke’s lower back. She wondered if she could go any lower and get a hold of Clarke’s butt. Lexa thought this might be the only chance she’d have with the teacher and so she fully went for it and squeezed the teacher’s butt cheeks. The teacher moaned immediately and Lexa kept massaging them over and over again. It felt so soft and firm at the same time and Lexa wanted more.

Lexa felt shakily and she prayed for a little strength when she got a good hold of the teacher’s butt and lift her up on the desk. The teacher put her legs around Lexa out of immediate response and Lexa stood between them, not even daring to break the kiss. Lexa loved how she didn’t have to ask for entrance to connect their tongues and they both moaned at the warm and soft feeling. This kiss was better than anyone she’d kissed before. The teacher had so much more experience than any other girl Lexa had ever kissed. She could easily tell and she didn’t want to break apart in a million years.

Clarke’s strong legs pushed Lexa hard against her center and Lexa felt herself growing painfully hard. Lexa placed her hands on Clarke’s lower back again and then traced down to where her skirt ended on her legs. Lexa started rocking her hips against the teacher once as she was feeling desperate but she didn’t care.  

Before rocking her hips again the teacher broke the kiss and Lexa wondered if she’d gone too far. They both breathed heavily against each other and then the teacher looked down, where Lexa was completely against the teacher, wrapped up in her legs.

The teacher let her go and Lexa too a step back, still shaky and dazed by what just happened. She kissed Clarke Griffin. She tasted Clarke Griffin’s lips. She made out with her teacher. Call it whatever you want but Lexa just did it. Lexa could see Clarke’s swollen pink lips and all she wanted was to kiss her again but she didn’t.

Clarke looked down at Lexa’s pants and Lexa immediately felt she was blushing. There was no point of hiding it now.

“You’d better go.” The teacher said after a while.

“Why? I’m sorry.”

The teacher shook her head. “I told you it were your hormones talking. I’m sorry. I just can’t be around you right now. Just leave please.”

Lexa looked disappointed. “Clarke, no. This isn’t about that. Let me show you.” Lexa stepped forward to kiss her again but the teacher lift herself off the desk and turned her back to Lexa.

“Let’s just go home. Please. It’s best for everyone.”

Lexa wanted to protest but she felt it was best if she didn’t and leave her teacher go home.

They silently walked to the parking lot to their car.

“Is it okay if I text you tomorrow or something?” Lexa asked a little nervously. She was scared she had ruined their relationship.

“I don’t know. It might be a bad idea.”

“So no hanging out anymore?”

“Probably not.”

“Why are you making such a big deal out of this? It’s clear it wasn’t just lust what we felt over there.”

The teacher sadly smirked.

“Sure. I’ll see you next week on Wednesday at music class.” Was all the older woman said as she left Lexa behind.

 

 

\----

 

 

She was still trembling and shaking from a few minutes ago. She didn’t know how she managed to drive home so smoothly. Her mind was still with Lexa all this time. The way her tongues collided and how her weight was fully against Clarke’s. She forgot what it felt like to be kissed that good and she totally let herself go, not even wanting to at first.

She did feel terrible for what just happened. She kissed her student. An eighteen year old. She didn’t know which one was worse. It just could never happen again. Even though she really wanted to. The way Lexa had been able to keep up with her desperate kisses. She wanted so much more at that moment and she was proud she didn’t.

Clarke let out a deep sigh as she threw herself on the couch.

“How was your evening?” Octavia said as she sat down next to Clarke.

Clarke smiled nervously.

“Fine. Just music class.”

“I know. Nothing ever interesting happens there I believe.” Octavia joked and Clarke laughed nervously again.

She wanted to tell someone so bad what just happened, but she absolutely couldn’t. This had been a big mistake and she never wanted to make it again.

“How was your last evening here? You ready to move out again?”

“Uh, so, yeah. Not really?”

Clarke frowned. “Why?”

“Don’t get mad or anything for not telling you earlier, but I met someone a week ago. A guy. His name’s Lincoln and we had a date just now.”

Clarke shook her head in disbelief.

“I mean, that’s great.”

“Not really, ‘cause I don’t want to leave town already now. He’s really great.” She said, making a puking noise after saying that.

Clarke laughed. “I’ve known you for a few weeks but I never thought I’d hear you say something like that.”

Octavia rolled her eyes. “I know. I’m grossing myself out.”

Another laugh. Clarke was glad Octavia could get her mind a little off of Lexa. She needed that. She couldn’t get caught up in her thoughts again. In this little, unrealistic bubble.

“How about you? Any luck after your ex-girlfriend?”

And that’s when it ended. Clarke thought of Lexa again.

Clarke tried thinking how she could still please Octavia with an answer but also herself.

“There was this guy who asked me out, but I refused.”

“What? Why? Who was it?”

Clarke shrugged uncaring. “He’s also a music teacher. I heard he was famous for his asshole attitude so I rejected him.”

Octavia widened her eyes.

“Oh my god another music teacher? It’s like meant to be. Clarke, you should give him a chance. Even if it’s just to keep your mind off of your ex.”

Clarke thought for a moment. Maybe she was right. Not about keeping your mind off of Niylah. But keeping her mind off of Lexa. It might be good to throw herself out there again. Even if it wouldn’t work out. At least it’d be better than making out with an eighteen years old student, right?

“I mean, I still do have his number.” Clarke quietly said.

Octavia smiled. “Go give it a shot. Maybe turns out to be your soulmate.” Octavia joked but Clarke knew she kind of meant it.

Clarke laughed, too and pulled out her phone. Staring at it. Hesitating what she should do. She bit her lip doubtingly. She didn’t really want to do it. But it’d be good for her, right? She could try and forget about what just happened between her and Lexa and really fall for someone who wasn’t going to want her just to get laid. She wasn’t sure Lexa could give that to her.

“Maybe.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things start picking up after this chapter. This is kind of a short one sorry...  
> Enjoy!

Lexa took another tasteless bite from her sandwich with ham and let out a deep sigh again. She still didn't know what exactly went wrong a few days ago with the teacher. In Lexa's mind nothing went wrong because it felt so right and so amazing and she wanted to kiss her teacher again. She couldn't stop thinking about her these last few days. She wanted to claim her tasty lips over and over but she was afraid of scaring her off again. All because she couldn't control her southern area. And it sucked.

It's not like she wanted it to happen. It just happened. Now Clarke thought she only saw her as a next girl on her list. That was never Lexa's intention. She cared about her teacher. She deserved to be kissed and held and caressed every moment of the day. That was already enough for Lexa.

“You're not hungry? ” Her mom asked as she sat down next to Lexa. It was Sunday and her mom had to work the night shift again.

Lexa shook her head slightly. 

“That's rare. Everything okay?”

Lexa hadn't told anyone about what happened Wednesday. She would always burden up her problems and drink them away. But she hadn't done that yet. It was tough, but she didn't want to fall back into her old pattern.

Lexa shrugged. “Everything okay.”

“Even though you shrugged?” Her mom asked again.

Lexa gave Indra a tiny grin and remained silent. 

“It's not about a girl, is it?”

Lexa locked their eyes. She knew her too well. There was no point in denying it anymore. But she still tried to deny it.

“I don’t know.”

“That one girl we talked about? What happened?”

“I don't wanna talk about it.”

“Alexandria...”

“It just didn't work out, okay.”

“Why? You're such a great girl.”

Lexa slightly rolled her eyes.

“I'm not like other girls.”

“Was that the problem? Because you don’t have the usual lady parts down there?”

“She didn't mind that. Just... you know. She noticed... and you know.” Lexa said awkwardly. She didn't really want to say it out loud to her mom. But at this point she had to tell someone about it. 

Her mom looked at her questionably.

“She thinks I just want to sleep with her, mom.” Lexa said quickly and left her mom no time to answer back.

“But I don't just want that. Besides, it's kind of complicated our relationship.”

Indra's eyes widened. 

“Why is it complicated?”

“Just- because. Trust me.”

Her mom let out a sigh.

“Lexa, there are so many other girls who will adore you for who you are. The girls are standing in line for you.”

"I don't want that."

Her mom sighed.

“Then talk to her.”

“She told me not to text her anymore.”

“Since when has that stopped you before? If you really care about her, it'll turn out okay. Explain to her how you feel.”

Lexa sighed again. She'd already done that and she failed. She wanted to talk to Clarke again, she missed her.

One text couldn't hurt, right?

She nodded at her mom.

“Okay. I'll text her. I would even be okay with staying friends at this moment, you know?”

Indra smiled. “Wow, I really want to meet this girl.”

Lexa's heart skipped a beat. What if her mom would find Clarke was her 10 year older teacher? Would she still be so supportive about this whole thing? 

**Lexa 2:48 p.m.** **  
** _Hey. I know you told me not to text you, but I kind of miss you... Can we please talk?_

 

A few hours passed and no text from the teacher. Lexa decided to text again.

 

 **Lexa** **8:15 p.m.**  
_I'm sorry I kissed you. I just want to talk this out._

 

**Miss Griffin 8:18 p.m.  
** _Why are you making this harder than it already is?_ _Just forget that it happened._

 

**Lexa 8:19 p.m.** **  
** _I can’t. Can I just come over?_

 

**Miss Griffin 8:24 p.m.  
** _I can't right now. I'm not at home._

 

 **Lexa 8:25 p.m.** **  
**_Okay..._  

 

**Miss Griffin** **8:32 p.m.** **  
** _Just come over in two three if you're still awake. I'll be home by then. We will only talk._

 

**Lexa 8:33 p.m.** **  
** _Okay. I know, I just want to talk._

 

**Miss Griffin** **8:36** **  
** _Okay._

 

\----

 

Three knocks this time until the teacher opened the door.

“Hey.” Was all she said and Lexa had missed her soft yet raspy voice. The teacher was wearing some comfortable black leggings and an oversized grey sweater, her hair up in a messy bun and it made Lexa smile for the first time today. She looked gorgeous. 

“Come in.”

“Thanks for letting me come over anyway.” She paused for a while. “‘cause I’ve really missed you.” Lexa went to hug her teacher like she always greeted her but she stopped her, placing her cold hand on her shoulder.

Clarke shook her head.

“No you didn’t.”

“Yes I did.”

“No. Why are you saying things like that?” She whispered.

Lexa smirked softly and then the teacher changed the conversation before Lexa could answer and claimed a spot on the couch where they had snuggled a few times now.

“I'm sorry for the mess by the way, I just got home.”

It was not a mess at all. The teacher had never seen Lexa's room. Now that was messy.

"It's okay."  She didn’t feel like asking where the teacher had been. She was too nervous about talking their own problems out.

The teacher sat down right next to Lexa and kept her distance.

“So why did you want to talk?”

"Because we kissed a few days ago?” Lexa raised her voice. They had to face what happened. "When are you going to stop pretending like nothing happened between us. Stop pretending that kiss didn't mean anything. It did to me.”

The teacher's jaw was a little open, ready to speak but Lexa could tell she didn't know what to tell her. 

“Clarke-?”

“Don’t call me that. And I don’t know what that kiss meant. We were just in the mood. You were just being nice to me.” The teacher almost cried and Lexa immediately felt guilty. She didn't want to make her cry.

“Why? Nobody is around. And I don’t know about you but that kiss was amazing.”

“We can’t do this. You’re my student.”

“Oh my god just fucking stop already. Stop saying that!” Lexa yelled.

“It’s the truth. I just don't know what you’re doing to me. I'm feeling things I shouldn't be feeling when I'm around you.” She cried out. Clarke said sadly and Lexa wanted to hold her and tell her everything was going to be okay, but she didn't know if she was allowed to.

"I care about you.”

“Don’t you even start. I don’t want you saying that.”

Lexa sighed out of frustration.

“Who says you weren’t the one taking advantage of me? It was pretty exciting right? A student. Ten years younger than yourself." She used the teacher's own words from the other day against her. “But do you hear me complaining about that? No.”

Clarke gasped almost inaudibly. “No of course not. And trust me I'm really not. But it doesn't matter. You and I could never be together in any way.”

Lexa felt a pain in her chest she couldn't explain. She felt the pain and she wanted to cry, but she didn't.

“So we feel the same way about each other but only I’m getting blamed for it?”

Clarke sighed and shrugged. “I’m blaming both of us.”

“So now what?” Lexa asked, not really ready for her answer.

Clarke locked their eyes and shrugged. She smiled softly and leaned back on the couch to move in closer to Lexa. Lexa’s arm was resting on top of the couch and Clarke just rested against her body. She had missed the teacher’s warmth against her. It made her feel relaxed.

“We can try and be friends?”

Lexa frowned and scoffed.

“So we just pretend like nothing happened?”

“We have to try. We’re adults, right? Not some horny teenagers. No offense.”

“None taken I guess.”

“We can do this, Lexa. We can hang out and not do anything.”

They were so close now that they locked eyes and Lexa looked into those dreamy, blue and wide pupiled eyes and all she cared about was being here with Clarke at the moment.

“We can try. But what if we can’t control ourselves?”

She definitely couldn’t control herself.

“We will. Let’s just hangout like normal friends from now on, okay?”

Lexa had no idea for how long she could do this before not controlling herself anymore, but she was going to try. For Clarke.

“Okay.”

 

\----

 

Monday morning and Lexa felt good. She had talked everything out with her teacher. Well, almost. As much as she wanted to kiss her again, they had to at least try to be friends without wanting to do that. Lexa hated the days they hadn’t talked this week because of what happened. She couldn’t let it happen again.

The bell rang and Lexa happily stood up when Mr. Collings walked up to her.

“Congrats, Miss Woods.”

Lexa frowned and they were alone in the classroom right now.

“It’s not my birthday yet.” Lexa said sarcastically. She didn’t feel like talking to Finn right now.

“I couldn’t care less. I meant that I’m a man of keeping promises. Which means you passed music class. There had been a mistake.” He winked.

Lexa looked disgusting that he just winked at her and when Finn wanted to walk away she stopped him.

“What? So I don’t have to do it over?”

“That’s right.” He raised an eyebrow.

“Why?”

“You haven’t heard?” He laughed. “I thought you two were kind of close.”

Lexa got more confused by the second.

“Just get to your point.”

“Your teacher and I went out on a date.”

 

 

\----

 

 

**Clarke 9:15 p.m.  
** _You’re not avoiding me, are you?_

Clarke let out a sigh. Lexa hadn’t been to music class today and she didn’t know why. She had really missed her today. And not just today. They hadn’t talked since Sunday. She didn’t know what came over her but she suggested to be friends with the student when she clearly wanted more. But good news was that if this was just about wanting to have sex she’d get over it. Right…? She didn’t need Lexa for that. Right now they were only friends. Which was best for everyone.

But why did it still feel like she was _missing_ something more these past few days?

She didn’t really regret going out with Finn because nothing happened between them. She just focused on Lexa passing music class and taking away her biggest worry. That’s what friends were for.

She wanted to tell Lexa about their date. She just couldn’t. She was afraid Lexa would get mad for some reason. Because she hated Finn.

 

**Clarke 9:48 p.m.  
** _I know you’re awake. Lexa please, don’t ignore me and avoid me on the same day._

**Lexa 9:50 p.m.  
** _I’m not in the mood._

 

**Clarke 9:51 p.m.  
** _What happened? Can I come over?_

**Lexa 9:55 p.m.  
** _No_

**Clarke 9:55 p.m.  
** _Why not?_

**Lexa 9:56 p.m.  
** _Because_

Clarke wondered what had happened. She was worried about her. Obviously she was mad about something but she hadn’t let her know this time. She wondered why.

 

**Clarke 9:57 p.m.  
** _Have you been drinking?_

**Lexa 9:57 p.m.  
** _I wish_

**Clarke 9:59 p.m.  
** _I’ve missed you…_

Clarke swallowed nervously.

 

 

**Lexa 10:01 p.m.  
** _Stop with the mixed feelings already_

**Clarke 10:02 p.m.  
** _What do you mean? Friends can miss each other. I just want to see you…_

 

**Lexa 10:03 p.m.  
** _Now you want to see me?_

**Clarke 10:03 p.m.  
** _Yes. And hug you._

**Lexa 10:08 p.m.  
** _Goddammit what are you doing to me..._

Clarke saw Lexa was still typing so she waited before she answered.

**Lexa 10:10 p.m.  
**_Fine._ ****  
  


 

Clarke’s mood immediately lit up and she smiled.

**Clarke 10:11 p.m.  
** _:-) Just send me your location_

****  
Lexa 10:11 p.m.  
_Okay. My mom’s gonna be here soon by the way_

**Clarke 10:12 p.m.  
** _No problem. I’ll be there in a minute_

**Lexa 10:12 p.m.  
** _Okay_


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said Friday, but I'm going away tomorrow for a few days so here it is! I don't know when the next update will be either but feel free to disturb me on my tumblr even though I'm not super active on it: Clexagriffinbean.
> 
> Enjoy!

 

Lexa was mad as hell. She tried her best to ignore the teacher’s text this evening but she failed miserably. She really tried not to text her back but she already convinced her by telling Lexa she missed her. It also helped that she had missed the teacher, too. She missed having someone to talk to who would take her seriously. But she was still mad at her teacher. She couldn’t believe she didn’t tell her about the date. If they were going to be friends they had to share things like this.

Lexa had been spending too much time thinking about her teacher this week. She couldn’t focus at today’s practice because of her. She blamed her teacher. She wanted to be friends but Lexa wanted more. She knew her feelings meant more than just lust which scared her to death. She had never felt something like this before for anyone.

She wondered how much it would mean to her teacher if she told her she missed her.

After a moment the doorbell rang and Lexa walked to the front door to open it.

She swung the front door open and there she was, at her house. Clarke Griffin. Lexa immediately recognized her jacket.

It was Lexa’s. The one she gave to her.

Clarke had her tight jeans on, black tight shirt and a V-neck so there was a little bit of cleavage and of course the jacket, her hair up in a bun and Lexa tried not to look too impressed. But she looked so cute in her baseball jacket. Lexa was glad she gave it to her.

“Hi.” Lexa said cool and Clarke smiled and got inside. She had missed that pretty smile but she couldn’t show. She was still mad deep inside.

“Hey.”

“Why are you wearing my jacket?”

“Because I officially own it, right? And I thought it would cheer you up a bit maybe.”

The teacher caught Lexa by surprise by hugging her for two seconds before letting her go again. Lexa quickly hugged her back.

Lexa sighed and tried not to show her smile. She walked upstairs and her teacher followed her. The teacher walked in first and looked around her.

“Wow, your room is messy.” She laughed a bit.

“I didn’t have enough time to clean it up before you came.”

The teacher sat down on Lexa’s bed and smiled again. Why was she so smiley?

Lexa kept her distance and leaned against her wall when her eyes wandered to the teacher’s cleavage again. She swore she really didn’t want to but it just went automatically. Clarke looked so hot.

“Is it okay if I just get under the covers?”

“Sure?” Lexa answered confused, staring at her.

“Just making myself comfortable, Woods. Don’t look at me like that.” She smiled and took off her shoes and got under the covers as she let out a happy sigh.

Lexa snorted and watched her carefully as she laid down under the covers.

“I feel like a stupid teenager again.” She laughed.

“Hey, not all teenagers are stupid.”

“Oh you’re right. I wasn’t.”

Lexa tried not to laugh but she did anyway and looked at her content teacher under her covers, only her head visible. She looked adorable. But Lexa stayed right where she was. Not daring to make a move.

“I’m sorry I forgot you were perfect back then.”

Clarke gasped dramatically. “Back then? I still am.”

Lexa laughed again. It was nice being able to talk to her teacher so normally again. She almost hated how easy it was to forget what happened.

“I’ve never seen a picture of you when you were a teenager.” Lexa said.

“Uh, let’s keep it that way. I was always the ugly kid.” She laughed. “And what are you still doing there? Get in here.” She held the bedcovers up.

“I’m good.”

The teacher pouted and Lexa thought she looked so cute.

“Please? I can listen better to you if you’re right next to me, talking about what’s bothering you.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and nervously took off her shoes to get under the covers, just right next to her teacher. She kept her distance but Clarke immediately pulled her in impossibly closer and buried her head in her neck. Lexa hated how automatically she put her arm around the teacher and the teacher rested her hand on her stomach. Caressing it softly with her fingers.

Lexa hated herself for not being mad anymore at her teacher. It’s what she was doing to her.

“I don’t believe you. You probably haven’t changed much.”

“I did. Unlike you. You already look… yourself.” The teacher swallowed loudly.

“I don’t know what that means but you look like yourself, too.”

The teacher let out a chuckle and Lexa felt the hot air of her breath against her neck and she shivered a little.

They laid in silence for a while, Clarke playing with Lexa’s shirt on her stomach and Lexa didn’t want this moment to end. But they had to face what came next at some point.

“Lexa?” A soft voice whispered.

“Yeah?”

“I meant what I texted you today. I’ve missed you.”

Lexa’s heart started pounding fast and she was surprised her teacher hadn’t caused her a heart attack already.

“I’m worried about you. What’s bothering you?”

Lexa sighed.

“You really don’t know?”

The teacher shook her head and started playing with her shirt in her hand. Lexa felt a bit nervous by it.

“I had to find out by the music teacher I hate that he went out with the music teacher I… I am friends with… But I don’t want to fight anymore. I just wish you would’ve told me. I didn’t know you were into him…” She bit her tongue.

Clarke remained silent for a while and gently pressed her hand against Lexa’s stomach.

“I wanted to tell you. And I’m not into him. I did it so you could pass your class.”

“Clarke,- It’s okay now to call you that, right?”

The teacher let out another chuckle. “Just not in front of other students.”

“Okay. So, Clarke, I couldn’t care less about that right now. You didn’t have to do something like that. It was a dick move from Finn.”

“I know. And I’m glad that’s over if I’m honest. I’m sorry. I should’ve told you.”

Lexa nodded and smiled a bit. How easy was it for her to calm Lexa down again.

Lexa let out a content smile.

“So no second date?”

“No. Not with Finn.”

“Cool.”

The teacher laughed and suddenly placed a tiny kiss on Lexa’s jaw which Lexa caught by surprise again. She shuddered but tried to ignore it. This was what friends did, right?

“Was Niylah your first girlfriend?” Lexa tried to focus on something else.

“Girlfriend? Yes. Relationship? No. I’ve dated another guy before Niylah. And a lot of hooking up with people when I was a teenager. But I already told you that.”

“And you’re into both, right?”

She felt Clarke nod.

“Yep. What about you?”

Lexa scoffed and laughed. “Just girls.” If it wasn’t obvious already.

“Right. I’m guessing most girls don’t mind that you have… something else down there, right? The girls are lining up for you.”

Lexa laughed. “For hooking up? No, they don’t mind. Finding someone who doesn’t mind in a relationship is a lot harder than you’d think. My ex didn’t, but then again we were just together for the sex.”

Clarke hummed. “That sucks. I don’t think it makes a difference, you know? People shouldn’t mind once they fall for you. Or even before that obviously.”

Lexa shrugged slightly. “I guess. It’s why I used to hook up with girls so much I think. I couldn’t find anyone who wanted more than that.”

She didn’t want to sound so miserable because she really wasn’t, but it was the truth.

“Used to?”

“Yeah, I don’t do that anymore. You know that.”

The teacher nodded again and lifted her head so she could face Lexa.

“Yeah. You don’t feel the need to?”

Lexa shrugged. She couldn’t tell her the truth which was that she only wanted to hook up with her.

“Not really. I do when I’m drunk. But I haven’t really been drunk anymore a while.”

Clarke smirked again and buried her head in Lexa’s neck again when Lexa felt some soft, wet lips in her neck. Another kiss and Lexa whimpered softly.

This is what friends did. This is what friends did when they hung out.

Lexa cleared her throat and then she heard a voice all her in the distance.

“ _Lexa?_ ”

Lexa immediately sat up straight.

“It’s my mom.” Lexa said and she left Clarke behind in her bed, walking to her bedroom door.

“ _Hello? Alexandria?_ ”

”Alexandria?” The teacher blurted out disbelieving and chuckled.

Lexa rolled her eyes.

“Yeah yeah, It’s my full name and I hope no one ever calls me that.”

Lexa opened the door.

“It’s cute.” The teacher said almost inaudibly.

Lexa smirked at her teacher and walked to her mom downstairs.

“Hi mom.” She said out of breath. Not because she was tired, but because she was nervous. She didn’t know what to tell her.

“Hi honey. What were you doing?”

“Er- I… You know… There is someone-”

“Good evening Miss Woods.” Clarke was already next to Lexa, holding out her hand to introduce herself.

“I’m Miss Griffin, Lexa’s new music teacher. Lexa needed some extra practice because, well, a class with fifteen students can’t all be taught at the same time with just one teacher, right? So I proposed to give her a private lesson today. I hope you don’t mind.”

Indra was a little overwhelmed and so was Lexa. But all Lexa focused on was the way she confidently talked to her mom. And the way she introduced herself. Hearing her call herself ‘Miss Griffin’ was pretty hot.

“No, no, not at all. Thank you so much for doing that. And call me Indra.”

Clarke smiled and nodded once. Lexa couldn’t stop watching this scene. Who would ever thought she would meet her mom like this.

“Uh, what do I owe you? How much for one private lesson?” Indra sighed out, looking for her wallet.

“Oh no, don’t worry about it. Lexa already made it up by paying me in her desire for earning.” She smiled softly and then winked at Lexa. Lexa could barely hold it together anymore at this point.

“Lexa? My Lexa? Well that’s new. But that’s good. Thank you.”

Clarke laughed.

“No worries. I was just heading home. I’ll see you next Wednesday. Good evening Lexa, Indra.” Clarke let herself out because Lexa was too frozen for walking with her to the door.

The teacher was already gone.

Lexa didn’t say anything to her mom when she walked upstairs. She didn’t want to be interrogated.

 

 **Lexa 11:15 p.m.  
** _You’re so full of shit. I love it._

**Miss Griffin 11:22 p.m.  
** _Yes I am. Your jacket smells just like you btw. Love it. Goodnight, Lexa_

This is what friends did. This is what friends texted each other.

**Lexa 11:23 p.m.  
** _:-) Goodnight Clarke_

\----

 

Finally Saturday which meant partyday. Not because they had won or even played a baseball game, just because she promised her friends to hang out with them more. They hadn’t seen each other that much lately and Lexa promised them she would make it up to them. Besides, she was in for a party. It had been a while.

“Pretty cool you passed music class. I thought you played like shit.” Raven said.

Lexa rolled her eyes and smiled.

“My teacher really helped me out.”

“I’m sure she did.” Raven said smug and Anya laughed.

“I’m serious guys. I wouldn’t have passed if it weren’t for her.” She literally did.

“Okay, An, don’t you think she should loosen up a bit? You’re too sober for this.”

Anya nodded. “Yes.”

“No.” Lexa said seriously.

“Come on, one beer. You won’t even get drunk.”

Lexa sighed and Raven was already on her feet walking to the drinks. She came back with three beers. One for each of them.

“Now drink.” Anya demanded.

Lexa sighed and did as she was told. One beer could definitely not hurt. Besides, she really needed it after these weeks.

Three beers.

“Woods don’t look but Echo’s cousin is coming this way.” Raven said.

 

\----

 

Seven beers.

**Miss Griffin 11:14 p.m.  
** _Hey I know it’s late but I need to talk to you_

**Lexa 11:29 p.m.  
** _She’s already talking to me byeee_

**Miss Griffin 11:32 p.m.  
** _??_

**Lexa 11:34 p.m.  
** _Srry tht wasn’t me. Everythingg okay?_

**Miss Griffin 11:37 p.m.  
** _Oh okay… I don’t know. Could you come over maybe?_

**Lexa 11:39 p.m.  
** _Im at thiss party and cant drive_

**Miss Griffin 11:41 p.m.  
** _That explains the typos. You’re drunk._

**Lexa 11:45 p.m.  
** _Not rly. Want me to come over??_

**Miss Griffin 11:46 p.m.  
** _No it’s okay. Go enjoy your party. I’ll talk to you tomorrow._

**Lexa 11:47 p.m.  
** _But I enjoy being with u moreee_

**Miss Griffin 11:48 p.m.  
** _Haha… Then come over tomorrow if you’re still up for it._

**Lexa 11:54 p.m.  
** _Im onmy way stay there_

**Miss Griffin 11:54 p.m.  
** _Lexa no! Oh god don’t drive please. Just stay where you are._

**Miss Griffin 12:03 a.m.  
** _Lexa??_

**Miss Griffin 12:09 a.m.  
** _Lexa stop worrying me and answer your phone…_

**Miss Griffin 12:13 a.m.  
** _Lexa!! Pick up your phone!_

One knock on the teacher’s door was already enough this time for her teacher to open the door and she was not looking happy. Lexa was smiling because she was happy to see her. She was wearing her pajamas which was just a black tank top and shorts, but really short and Lexa couldn’t stop staring.

“What the hell were you thinking?” The teacher said mad as she pulled Lexa inside.

Lexa laughed dumbly. “That I wanted to come over.”

“Why didn’t you pick up your phone?”

“I wanted to surprise you.”

The teacher sighed. “You shouldn’t have driven all the way to here. Do you realize how dangerous that is?”

“I walked.”

“You walked?” The teacher relaxed a little bit in her voice and Lexa only nodded.

Lexa took a step closer to the teacher and went in for a hug.

The teacher let out a sigh and stopped her and Lexa pouted.

“You stink.”

“I do? Can I shower?”

“Lexa, no. Come sit down.”

“Sorry I stink. I just went to this party with friends.”

“I know. And a random person texted me back from your phone.”

Lexa laughed a little but then immediately stopped. “That wasn’t funny. Ontari grabbed my phone out of my hands.”

“Ontari?”

“Echo’s cousin.”

The teacher frowned. “I see. I’m guessing one of your booty calls?”

Lexa shook her head heavily. “Absolutely not.”

The teacher sighed and sat down on the couch.

“Isn’t she good looking enough for you?”

Lexa followed her teacher and threw herself on the couch as well.

“She’s pretty.”

The teacher nodded and locked their eyes a little awkwardly.

“Well, sorry I ruined your chance at her by texting you to come over.”

Lexa shook her head again.

“No don’t. I’d do it again. I’d do it every time. You’re way prettier and stuff.”

The teacher tried to hold back her smile but failed.

“And stuff?” She asked.

Lexa gave her a smirk.

“And stuff.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

Lexa was still dumbly looking at her, smiling wide.

“Sorry I stink.”

The teacher shrugged. “I could just give you your jacket back for now. You’ll smell like yourself again.”

Lexa shook her head.

“I prefer seeing it on you.”

The teacher chuckled.

“And here I thought nobody could make me laugh today.”

Lexa laughed, too, and moved in closer.

“Why not?”

“I don’t know. Somebody called me today and I don’t know whether to be too happy about it or not. That’s why I asked you to come over and talk.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay.” The teacher smiled softly. Like she thought it was cute Lexa just asked that.

“I just need your opinion. I trust your opinion.”

“Tell me.”

The teacher hesitated.

“I prefer telling you when you sober up. I could need your honest opinion, you know?”

Lexa pouted.

“I’m very honest.”

“I know. But I’ll tell you tomorrow or something.” The teacher chuckled and Lexa pouted again.

A comfortable silence filled the room.

“Can I still stay for a while?”

“Of course.”

Lexa smiled. “Cool.”

“You don’t want to go back to the party?”

Lexa shook her head again.

“I’d rather be here with you.”

The teacher chuckled again.

“Can I please cuddle you?” Lexa asked desperately.

“No…” The teacher said jokingly.

Lexa already tried putting her arms around her teacher but her teacher fought back and didn’t let her.

“Oh god no, you really stink, Lexa.” Clarke laughed and Lexa managed to finally embrace her teacher, grabbing her arms so she couldn’t go anywhere and then she rested her head against her chest.

The teacher laughed. “This is torture.” She screamed out.

Lexa let her go.

“I didn’t come here to not hug you.” Lexa said educated.

“Oh really? Well you should just really shower then, because I don’t think I can hold in my breath for another minute.”

“Can I?”

“Sure. I’ll give you some clothes.”

“Okay I’ll hurry.”

Lexa showered as fast as she could and she couldn’t do anything else then to keep on her own boxers and bra, but she got a plain black shirt from her teacher and some jogging pants, which she was absolutely thankful for.

Lexa sat down next to her teacher again who was watching TV. She greeted her with a soft smile.

“You look like those clothes are actually yours.” The teacher said seriously.

Lexa laughed and put her hand around her waist.

“Okay, you weren’t lying about cuddling.” She laughed and melted into Lexa’s body, her head buried in her neck.

“You smell nice.” The teacher whispered and then took a sniff from Lexa’s skin, her cheek.

Then she placed a tiny kiss there again and Lexa tried holding it together but she barely could.

This is what friends did.

They watched TV for a while when the teacher lifted her legs in Lexa’s lap, being wrapped up in each other. Lexa responded by resting her free hand on the teacher’s naked legs and caressed them softly. It felt intimate but the teacher didn’t seem to mind so Lexa ran her fingers up and down a few times. They felt so soft and smooth.

Suddenly the teacher placed her hand on Lexa’s and Lexa froze and she still tried holding it together.

“Stop, you’re making me nervous.” The teacher laughed.

Lexa relaxed and laughed, too.

“Is this okay?” She stopped running her fingers up and down and only caressed them again a little.

The teacher nodded into her neck but didn’t pull back her hand from Lexa’s.

After a long silence the teacher broke it.

“You’re pretty calm when you’re drunk.”

“You’re really cuddly when you’re drunk.”

“Am I?” The teacher said shockingly.

Lexa hummed.

“Hm. Never heard that before.”

Lexa smiled and she couldn’t help but to look to her left where the teacher’s head was and she placed a gentle kiss on her head.

The teacher wasn’t bothered by it but she didn’t move either.

A little while later watching TV and Lexa let out a content sigh which made the teacher cause to look up to Lexa.

They smiled at one another and Lexa stared at her beautiful lips and god she wanted to kiss her. The teacher didn’t look away from her and they were so close and Lexa thought it was okay to kiss her because the teacher didn’t look away from her.

And she did.

She carefully leaned in and connected their lips. She tasted like soft mint and it was delicious. The teacher didn’t kiss her back at first and Lexa was ready to pull away because what was she doing? She was kissing her again.

Right before pulling back the teacher started sucking Lexa’s bottom lip again. Lexa figured it was her favorite move when they kissed and Lexa smirked through the kiss.

“Lexa, you’re drunk.” She whispered against her lips.

Lexa shook her head and captured Clarke’s lips again, just like she had been thinking about doing that for these last couple of days. Lexa still caressed the teacher’s legs gently and the teacher didn’t dare to move her hand away from hers.

The teacher kissed her back but her words said something else.

“Yes, you are.” She whispered again and Lexa whimpered softly.

Lexa kissed her softly and gently because she was afraid the teacher would stop kissing her. She stopped caressing her legs and carefully grabbed the teacher’s cheeks who was still sucking her bottom lip like it was the only thing that kept her alive.

Clarke’s skin felt so soft everywhere and Lexa felt two arms around her neck, pulling her closer.

“Hm. No. We. Can’t.” She said in between kisses and Lexa listened carefully.

Maybe she should stop. But if felt so amazing. Having Clarke against her body, kissing her. It was all Lexa wanted.

Lexa decided to pull back when the teacher stopped sucking her bottom lip before it changed the mood.

“Sorry.” Lexa whispered and rested her forehead against her teacher’s.

They were still wrapped up into each other and the teacher weirdly enough chuckled.

“Don’t be. You’re a good kisser.”

The teacher pulled back and bit her lip. She thought Clarke looked so hot and Lexa stared at her lips because how could she not?

“So are you.” Lexa smirked softly.

The teacher let out a sigh. “God what are we doing.”

“Forget about it again?”

“And wait for you to kiss me again?”

“Yeah?”

The teacher snorted and sighed.

“You know what? That doesn’t sound like such a bad plan after all.” She silently said. “Even though you might forget this tomorrow because you’re drunk.”

“Trust me, I won’t forget this. Besides, I’m really not that drunk.”

She wasn’t really. Time had passed since she drunk up her last beer.

The teacher rolled her eyes, not really believing her.

“You’re not mad at me for drinking? You haven’t said anything about it.”

“I mean, I wish you hadn’t. But it’s not a bad thing to drink sometimes. Just know when to do it. Do it on party’s. Not because you’re feeling miserable and trying to forget about it.”

Lexa nodded.

“I mean, that’s my opinion.” She quickly added.

Lexa nodded again and smiled. She only thought about kissing her again.

The teacher yawned without wanting to.

“So… I should go home. Or at least to Anya’s. I promised to sleep over there tonight.”

“Your best friend?”

Lexa nodded.

The teacher smiled and sounded relieved somehow.

“You want me to drive you there?”

“It’s okay, I’ll walk. It’s only a five minute walk or so.”

It wasn’t, but Lexa didn’t want to trouble her teacher.

“Are you sure? I really don’t mind.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

“Okay, well… Could you maybe just text me when you get there? I’d sleep better knowing that.” She shrugged slightly.

Lexa nodded again and smiled. No one has ever asked her to do that before except for her mom sometimes.

“Of course.”

They both stood up and walked to the front door. Lexa opened it and turned around to her tired teacher. She went in for a goodbye hug and she felt her teacher holding her close. She let out a happy sigh and relaxed against Clarke for a while.

Lexa took a tiny step back to face her teacher and she felt powerless towards her own brain because she captured Clarke’s lips again. The teacher smiled through the kiss and she didn’t pull back. Lexa pecked the teacher’s lips a few times more before she pulled back again. It lasted too short but then again it always lasted too short in Lexa’s opinion. If this was going to be their new way of saying goodbye to each other, Lexa would come over every single day from now on.

This is not what friends did.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the delay but there really wasn't anything I could do about without my laptop... I hope this long chapter makes a bit up for it :)

**Lexa 10:29 a.m.  
** _Good morning, Clarke :-)_

**Miss Griffin 10:38 a.m.  
** _Good morning, Lexa_

**Lexa 10:41 a.m.  
** _Do you still want me to come over later?_

**Miss Griffin 10:42 a.m.  
** _You remember? Yes if you can, I still want to talk to you_

**Lexa 10:43 a.m.  
** _Of course I remember. Sure, I’ll come over for lunch if that’s okay_

**Miss Griffin 10:44 a.m.  
** _With pizza? :-)_

**Lexa 10:48 a.m.  
** _I should’ve known you were more excited for pizza than for me. Again. But sure_

**Miss Griffin 10:49 a.m.  
**_You just made my day._ ****  
  


“What are you doing?” Anya asked Lexa, who was smiling wide to her phone.

Lexa’s smile disappeared and she cleared her throat.

“Nothing.”

“Spill.”

“No.”

“Lexa… Talk to me. You were gone for like a few hours last night and nobody knew where you were and then when you came back your hair was wet and you changed clothes all of a sudden.”

Lexa remained silent, knowing she couldn’t protest it because it was the truth.

“What happened to ‘I’ll tell you everything from now on, An’?”

Lexa locked their eyes dramatically. She literally didn’t know what to tell her. She wanted to tell her everything that happened last night because it was amazing. But maybe it was best if she didn’t just yet. She didn’t know what last night meant.

“I just went over to see a friend.”

“To a friend? Which one? Why wasn’t this friend at the party?”

“Because she wasn’t feeling that well.” Lexa kind of lied. “And it was Clarke. You remember Clarke?”

“Hot blonde Clarke at the party with your baseball jacket? I didn’t know you were really friends with her. Just thought it was another booty call.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “She’s my friend. Just went to check up on her last night and that’s it.”

Anya squinted her eyes and Lexa’s heart was almost pounding out of her chest. She hated lying to her. She was good at it though. Probably because she lied to her mom more often.

“Alright then. I guess I should believe you. She looked kind of old to be your friend though but whatever. What are you doing later? Want to go out for lunch?”

Lexa laughed nervously and ignored the first part of her sentence. “I can’t. I just promised Clarke to talk to her about something important today. But I can do dinner if you want?”

Anya rolled her eyes. “You’re not gonna replace me for her, are you?” She joked. “But I can do dinner.”

Lexa snorted and put an arm around Anya.

“Trust me. You can’t be replaced. Nobody’s as weird as you are.”

Anya laughed. “Good. And you should invite her sometime. If you’re that close to her I’d like to see her more often.”

Lexa swallowed nervously and only nodded. There was no way. If her friends would find out Clarke was her music teacher, they would never shut up about it.

“Sure.” Was all she said. Knowing she probably would never do it. The teacher wasn’t even interested she guessed. Being around a couple of teenagers wasn’t exactly her favorite thing to do in her free time.

“Okay well, tell Clarke I said hi and I’ll see you for dinner tonight.”

Lexa nodded and remained silent. She was still thinking about what would happen if Clarke would hang out in public with her and her friends. She’d like it. She’d really like it.

Lexa went home and took another hot shower. She smelled like cigarettes and booze again even after showering at Clarke’s apartment last night. That’s why she had to smell nice right now. She even wore a nice up buttoned blouse.

Lexa got their pizza on the way and she kind of felt nervous on her way to the teacher. She didn’t know what was so important to talk about it to her but only after sobering up. She hoped it was nothing serious but she kind of thought it was.

Even though she had a few drinks last night she remembered every single word she said last night to Clarke. She remembered every single thing they did and she wanted to do it again. She wondered if it was weird now that she hadn’t drank anything. Maybe her teacher went along with it last night because she thought Lexa was drunk. Maybe the teacher thought Lexa would forget what happened the day after.

But she hadn’t forgotten. She knew exactly what they had been doing.

Lexa knocked on the door and soon it opened, greeted by the gorgeous, blonde woman with half a smile.

“Pizza!” Clarke screamed happily.

Lexa smiled wide before saying anything and noticed Clarke was wearing comfortable clothes again. Some tight jeans, a way too big sweater, barely any make up and her hair was loose today. She loved how comfortable Clarke felt around her. She loved the way Clarke still looked absolutely beautiful without putting much effort into her looks.

“No, my name’s Lexa.” Lexa joked and gave her a warm smile that lit Clarke’s whole face up.

“Hey, Lexa.” Clarke said happily and Lexa automatically stepped into the teacher’s arms. The teacher let out a deep sigh against Lexa’s shoulder and Lexa pulled away to face her, not letting go of Clarke.

Would it be weird if she would go in for a kiss? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe just a tiny one would be okay. Just a peck.

Lexa quickly leaned in and captured Clarke’s lips once again. Lexa noticed the teacher wasn’t prepared but she did lean in further to Lexa’s body. It was short like Lexa intended to but it was longer than just a peck. It was just enough to taste her properly and god, she tasted good.

The teacher laughed a little and shook her head out of disbelief and Lexa noticed.

“My bad.” Lexa smiled softly.

Clarke shrugged, not really knowing what to say.

“We’re good friends. It’s not that weird, right?” The teacher said, frowning deeply like she didn’t mean it.

Lexa shrugged. “This is what friends do sometimes.”

Clarke let Lexa go, grabbing the pizza out of her hands and putting it on the dinner table. She leaned her body against the same table, her arms crossed. The teacher’s expression was already different.

“It’s not. I think we both know that. But I still kind of really like it.”

Lexa took a step closer to Clarke and smiled softly.

“I kind of really like it, too.”

Lexa took another step closer to put her arms around the teacher’s waist and all Clarke did was put her arms around Lexa’s neck, like she had been waiting for her to step in closer this whole time.

“But we can’t continue this forever.” Clarke said quietly.

“Clarke, not again.” Lexa sounded a little desperate.

“That’s not what I meant.”

Clarke held Lexa a little bit tighter and Lexa watched her nervously.

“Look, I wanted to talk to you, right?”

Lexa nodded and remained silent.

“Don’t get me wrong, Lexa, but we won’t be able to do… this… if we’re miles apart from each other.”

Lexa frowned.

“We’re barely three inches away from each other at the moment.”

Clarke softly grinned.

“I’m glad you can always make me smile but that’s not what I meant.” Clarke let out a deep sigh and she nervously started playing with Lexa’s collar.

“The reason why I wanted you to come over was because I was offered a job yesterday back in LA.”

Lexa nodded before she truly heard what she was saying. She remained silent and listened carefully while Clarke played with the buttons of her buttoned up blouse.

“They heard some of my music and offered me a record deal. I got a call yesterday saying that they would love to meet me as soon as possible which is tomorrow. I’m already packed.” She pointed to her suitcases right next to the tv which Lexa hadn’t even noticed before.

Lexa just looked shocked but tried not to. Out of all the things that she thought about, this was the last thing she expected. This was the last thing she wanted. But she also wanted to be happy for her teacher.

“Oh my god. I mean, that’s great. Congratulations.” She said with half a smile.

Clarke smiled sadly. “Is it? I don’t know.”

Lexa gently tucked the teacher’s hair behind her ear with one hand and then cupped her cheek.

“It is, right?”

Clarke shook her head.

“I don’t know, Lexa. This was my dream when I was a kid, but right now I’m just a teacher. And I enjoy it so much. I don’t know if I want anything more than that but it would probably make my dad so proud and happy. I feel like he died for this. This is what he wanted for me.”

Clarke looked down insecurely. Clarke never seemed insecure.

“I don’t know if I’m going yet. I’m already packed but-” She breathed out.

Lexa didn’t know what to tell her. She didn’t want her teacher to leave. She wanted her to stay. But this wasn’t about her. This situation was making Clarke feel insecure and even sad.

“Clarke, don’t do it for your father. Do whatever makes you happy.”

Clarke shrugged and locked eyes with Lexa.

“I know. And even if I would accept the deal tomorrow, I don’t know if I could ever pull it off. I mean, me, a famous musician?” She scoffed.

“Clarke, I’m not doubting you and they aren’t either so why should you?”

The blonde softly smiled and shrugged out of frustration.

“Because I’ll be alone. Maybe travelling around the states. By myself. Maybe traveling around the world. I don’t like traveling, Lexa. I get really carsick and-”

Lexa shushed her and tried not to laugh at her panicking voice rambling about her getting car sick.

“You’ll be fine. You’re not alone.” Lexa cupped her other cheek as well and caressed her them with her thumb. Her skin always felt so soft and it made Lexa relax a little.

The teacher let out a sigh that seemed to be relief.

“I may never see you again after I leave, you know?” She continued.

Lexa swallowed thickly. She didn’t want to think about that.

“Maybe I’ll see you on the big screen. Or you know, I’ll come to your concerts and stuff. You’ll get me a free ticket of course. Or maybe I’ll even play the drums in the background.” She tried to lighten up the mood and it worked.

Clarke smiled and pulled Lexa’s collar closer to her until her lips met hers. It was a quick peck, so quick Lexa couldn’t even process that it just happened.

“Maybe.” She laughed softly.

Lexa stared happily at the beautiful lips she just tasted. They always tasted so sweet and minty.

“I don’t know. It all sounds so great, but I’m scared.” The teacher continued like nothing just happened.

Lexa nodded and pushed her hair back from her face again.

“You’re gonna be great. That’s one thing I’m sure of.” She almost whispered.

Clarke smiled sadly.

“So if you were me, you would take the chance?”

Lexa nodded and a pain in her chest suddenly appeared.

“I mean, you deserve this. You’ve worked hard for this. You even finished your songs which I didn’t know about. I told you your freestyling was pretty bombing.”

Clarke laughed and pecked their lips quickly again.

“You’ve got to stop doing that without a warning. I want to prepare myself.” Lexa laughed out.

Clarke smiled and nodded.

“Yeah. Sorry. I shouldn’t be doing it at all. But you just told me to do whatever makes me happy.”

Lexa smiled. “I make you happy?”

“Your lips do. Don’t be so smug.” Clarke rolled her eyes slightly and laughed. “You uh- Do you maybe want to spend some time here together?” Clarke said, looking and playing with Lexa’s buttons when she carefully opened the upper button.

Lexa swallowed out of nerves.

“You know, just to say goodbye.” She continued and Clarke’s eyes turned impossibly dark.

Lexa watched her teacher in front of her and all she cared about was kissing her right now. She wanted to taste those sweet lips again and take her time to explore her mouth in every way. If this was the last time she was going to be with her teacher, she wanted to make the best of it. She had to do something before she left.

“You’re quiet-”

“You’re really leaving.”

Lexa rested their foreheads together after Clarke nodded.

“I know.”

Silence.

“I will really regret not doing anything right now.” Clarke whispered.

“What do you mean?” Lexa frowned.

Clarke started playing with her buttons again. “You know what I mean. With you. I don’t know what it is but I feel like we need to do something or I think I’ll explode.”

Lexa whimpered softly. “Like what?”

Clarke warmed her with a smirk and almost closed the gap between their lips.

“You know what. What if we really do this right now? Just a one-time thing I mean. We’ll both sexually satisfy each other, have our wildest fantasy come true, student and teacher, and we move on. Like we always do. We won’t have the urge to kiss or touch each other anymore after that.”

Lexa’s mouth ran dry as she carefully listened and understood what her teacher said. Like she could ever say no to something like this.

Lexa nodded carefully.

“And after that we forget each other?”

Clarke nodded. “Well, we forget that it happened. So tomorrow we’ll be normal again. We both had what we wanted and we move on. No crazy hormones from your side and no crazy hormones from my side.”

“That’s what you want? I thought you didn’t do one-time things.”

Clarke nodded carefully. “I did say that, didn’t I? It’s true but I haven’t been getting laid in months and I just really need to right now.” She whispered in one breath.

Lexa hesitated but she knew she shouldn’t. Of course this was what she wanted.

“Unless you don’t want to. I know you don’t hook up with girls anymore-”

“No, I want to. I can make an exception.” Lexa eagerly nodded before she would pass out or something.

“Good. ‘Cause I’m going to need you all day and night.” She said low and Lexa swore she almost passed out this time. Clarke sounded incredibly hot right now and Lexa wished she could record it and play it over and over again just to hear her voice. Lexa just started panting by the thought of being intimate with her teacher.

“Can I kiss you?” Lexa whispered back, already brushing her bottom lip against Clarke’s.

The teacher smiled and nodded.

“This is new. You never ask.”

Lexa let out a laugh and didn’t waste any time taking Clarke’s tasty lips into her mouth. The blonde placed her arms around her neck and emptied the gap between them so they were chest to chest and Lexa couldn’t wait to feel the way their bodies brushed against each other without their clothes on.

Clarke tasted so good. Her taste was so addicting and sweet and she didn’t know who opened their mouth first but they immediately slipped their tongues into each other’s mouth and explored every single spot when they got the chance.

“You’re so hot.” Lexa smirked against the teacher’s lips.

Clarke hummed in approval when Lexa’s hands wandered dangerously low her butt. Lexa thought it was okay to squeeze it again and so she did. Lexa massaged Clarke’s butt gently, receiving a perfectly formed moan escaping Clarke’s mouth and Lexa massaged it. Just to hear her perfect moans over and over again. Lexa smiled at the hot sensation and Clarke started to give her messy and desperate kisses when she pulled her own shirt off. Lexa sucked in a breath when she looked down. Clarke was wearing a black lacy bra and she licked her lips deliciously before crashing their lips together again.

“ _God_ I want you.” Clarke mumbled out between kisses.

Lexa moaned in response and she didn’t need to hear more.

Lexa tilted the teacher up the dinner table, positioning herself between her legs as she unzipped Clarke’s pants and took them off.

Lexa’s knees were shakily again and she started to feel herself getting incredibly hard when the teacher rocked her hips into her bulge. This had been a while for Lexa, too. She tried her best not to cum right there in her pants.

It was clear they both wanted this but Lexa wasn’t sure what was going to happen after. She didn’t want to stop seeing her teacher but if this was going to be her only chance of being intimate with her, she wouldn’t hold back.

Clarke continued unbuttoning Lexa’s blouse and pulled it off as Lexa started groaning with each thrust.

“Oh god, Lexa.” Clarke moaned desperately and Lexa wasn’t sure who was worked up more out of the two of them.

Clarke unzipped Lexa’s pants as well and they were both left in their underwear. Lexa was quick to connect her lips with Clarke again as Clarke only kissed her messily.

“Can I take this off?” Lexa asked breathlessly, pulling her bra.

Clare nodded eagerly and Lexa didn’t waste any time to do so. She tossed her bra off to the side and Lexa gasped as she revealed her big, perfectly round formed breasts. Lexa took a tiny moment to take in the sight in front of her and then immediately took a nipple into her mouth.

Clarke groaned and grabbed Lexa’s hand to bring them up her other breast, squeezing it. They were so squishy and Lexa wanted more and started rocking into Clarke with abandon. Lexa groaned again and when she felt Clarke undo her bra as well and toss it away, she grabbed her from the dinner table and walked to the hallway.

“Which one again?” Lexa mumbled confused against Clarke’s lips.

Clarke started laughing, tightening her grip on Lexa’s neck.

“Bedroom? At the end of the hallway.” She said in between kisses and Lexa smirked.

She found her bedroom in no time and Lexa remembered it being so clean as the last time she was here.

She gently laid Clarke down as Lexa settled between her legs again. Their bodes fit so perfectly into each other and she pulled Clarke in for a long, hot kiss. Clarke started grinding up and Lexa needed relief right now.

It was like her prayers had been heard because Clarke started pulling at Lexa’s underwear to take them off.

“Is this okay?” Clarke whispered against her lips and how could Lexa not find it okay? She was painfully hard and she needed to take her boxers off right now.

Lexa only nodded, breathing hard against Clarke as she did the same. Lexa helped Clarke and pulled her boxers off. Lexa had to admit she was kind of nervous. She was going to reveal herself now to the teacher and her experience with other girls had always been that most of them couldn’t take Lexa. They couldn’t take her even if they wanted nothing else. She just really hoped the teacher would be able to because she was not the average size.

She finally pulled her boxers down and all she felt was relief. Her dick flopped out and stood proudly straight, almost against her abs.

The teacher gasped when she looked down.

“Oh my god.” She breathed out and her eyes widened a little.

Lexa didn’t dare to move. She didn’t want to do anything the teacher didn’t want to do.

“You want to stop?” Lexa asked softly.

Clarke shook her head, her eyes still focused on her full length dick.

“ _Absolutely_ not.” Clarke whispered and took Lexa in for another sloppy, teeth clashing kiss.

Lexa felt relieved for now and smiled against the teacher’s lips again.

“Take my panties off.” Clarke instructed and Lexa didn’t think twice. She dipped her fingers into her underwear once before she got rid of the teacher’s panties. She could already feel her wetness through her panties and Lexa whimpered at the feeling.

Lexa moaned loudly when she took a good look between Clarke’s legs. Lexa noticed no hair, only a lot of wetness and Lexa ran her fingers through her folds. She couldn’t believe this was happening right now.

Clarke arched her back and Lexa took another nipple into her mouth, also her fingers working between Clarke’s legs on her clit. But Clarke stopped her.

“No foreplay. I can’t. Much longer.” She breathed and Lexa’s dick twitched at the words.

Her teacher was so worked up and Lexa had never enjoyed such an experience as with her teacher and she’s shared her bed with a lot of girls.

Lexa nodded and then gasped.

“ _Shit_ I don’t have a condom.”

The teacher stilled and remained silent for a while. She looked into Lexa’s worried eyes. If they weren’t going to have sex right now Lexa would explode right here right now. She was holding back for too long now.

“I’m on the pill. Just hurry.”

Lexa relaxed and at the same time was getting more and more worked up, she didn’t even know it was possible. She’s had sex without a condom before with Costia, but that was a long time ago. It felt way better without a condom obviously.

Lexa nodded and positioned herself right against Clarke’s center. The both looked down, wanting to see Lexa slip into Clarke.

Lexa swallowed thickly as she spread Clarke’s legs wider. Lexa pushes gently into Clarke and she feels her tip slip into her entrance. Lexa almost dies when Clarke pushes her hips down and Lexa’s head slips all the way in.

“I need more.” Clarke breathed out and Lexa nodded.

Lexa pushed slowly inside of Clarke, her dick sliding in easily with how wet the blonde already was. They both moaned out each other’s names when Lexa bottomed out into Clarke and she felt Clarke’s walls clench in pleasure nonstop.

“You’re so big.” Clarke mumbled.

“You okay?” Lexa whispered and Clarke nodded.

“Just need a moment. Go slow.” Clarke instructed her and Lexa nodded.

Lexa slowly pushed out of Clarke again to only push it all the way back in. The sounds Clarke was making were a mix between pain and pleasure and Lexa continued her slow pace, stretching Clarke’s walls. Clarke felt so warm and tight and Lexa wasn’t sure how much longer she needed before she’d cum right there.

“ _Oh_ _God_ I feel full.” Clarke whimpered and Lexa moaned loudly.

Clarke got used to her size and started meeting Lexa’s hips in the middle, grinding up. She put her legs around Lexa’s waist and helped her thrusting deeper into her by pushing Lexa’s ass closer to her with each thrust.

“Go faster.” Clarke instructed breathlessly and Lexa did as she was told again. She wanted to do anything the teacher made her feel good.

She felt Clarke clench around her and it was a feeling she never would have wanted to miss in her life. She was so worked up and hearing Clarke moan beneath her was not making her last longer. She loved making Clarke feel good. She loved being inside of her and Lexa bit her lip to choke back a loud moan when she felt her teacher’s wetness dripping out of her.

Lexa thrusted deep inside of her and she wanted to give it to Clarke so good, she would remember this moment with Lexa forever. She even wanted her to write songs about this moment, just to let the whole world know how amazing this felt. With the way Clarke cried out with each thrust, Lexa wasn’t going to last. But she wanted to make Clarke come first. She was dedicated to do so and she tilt Clarke’s hips up to thrust deeper inside of her. Lexa set up the pace as she started pounding into the teacher.  

Lexa leaned down to Clarke’s breasts again, taking and licking another nipple into her mouth as she reached for her clit with one of her hands. Clarke’s grip tightened around Lexa’s waist and ass and her moans were getting louder every second.

“Lexa-” Clarke moaned. “I’m close.”

Lexa smirked and Clarke’s moans were turning her on even more, causing Lexa to pound into her like she never had before with anyone else. She guessed it was because other girls couldn’t take her the way her teacher did. She thought she never wanted to be inside of anyone else since no one could ever top Clarke.

Clarke held Lexa close with her legs and Lexa picked up her pace again as she stared at the teacher beneath her, escaping loud moans and whimpers out of her open mouth. It was so beautiful to watch Clarke cry out and shake beneath her as she completely came around Lexa’s dick.

Clarke squeezed her in the best way possible which made Lexa orgasm too without even wanting to yet. But she couldn’t help it. Clarke felt so good around her and feeling Clarke choke her dick was probably the best sexual experience she’s ever had. Lexa’s release inside of Clarke makes her clench around her and she milked Lexa’s dick for all that she can as they both rode out their orgasm.

Lexa let herself fall on top of Clarke and pressed a kiss in her neck, both being out of breath.

Lexa then looked up at Clarke who was smiling and she kissed Clarke gently again.

“That was amazing.” The teacher said.

Lexa nodded. “It definitely was.”

“I’ll clean you up in a minute. I need pizza first.” Clarke groaned against her lips and Lexa smiled wider and nodded.

“ _Oh shit._ ” Lexa suddenly said. She suddenly remembered she made Anya a promise this morning.

“What?”

“I’m having dinner with Anya in a few minutes. I totally forgot.”

Lexa got off her teacher and the teacher started laughing.

“Just your luck.” She smiled as she watched Lexa pull on her clothes again.

“I’m so so so sorry. I can still come over after dinner, right? I’ll make it up to you.”

The teacher smiled and watched Lexa with hungry eyes.

“You’d better.”

 

\----

 

 

Lexa wasn’t focused at all at dinner. Anya’s words flew right through her. She was hearing her, but she didn’t know what she was saying. She could only think about going back to Clarke again later. She didn’t know what would happen later but it’s not like she really cared. She just had the most amazing sexual experience of her life with her teacher and she didn’t want this to be a one-time thing. She wanted to follow Clarke everywhere and touch her again and listen to those beautiful moans escaping her mouth. Clarke was so hot moaning and shaking underneath her. Lexa couldn’t believe she was the one causing that. She was the one that made Clarke-

“Earth to Lexa? Where’s your head at?” Anya waved at her.

Lexa shook her head to shake her thoughts off.

“Dinner.”

“No it wasn’t. You were thinking about something else.”

“I’m just tired.” Lexa lied. I mean, not really. The teacher really wore her out but she was happy to be wore out again if it meant she could be inside of Clarke for another mere second. She would love nothing else. The sensation of being inside of _her_ and the feeling of their bodies fitting perfectly together like they were made for each other-

“Hello? You’re doing it again.” Anya waved aggressively this time.

Lexa rolled her eyes again.

“I’m just hungry and I’m tired. Don’t push my buttons.”

Anya let out a laugh.

“You’re not listening to my story.”

Lexa laughed embarrassed. “Sorry, tell me again.”

”No forget it. How was it at Clarke’s? When are we meeting up with her again?”

Lexa was sad to answer her question. She didn’t want to think about it.

“You’re probably not. She’s leaving town tomorrow.”

“Oh wow. For good?”

Lexa nodded.

“Why?”

Lexa shrugged. “For a better job.”

“That’s a good thing. Just not for your friendship.”

Lexa snorted. “I’ll be fine.”

She wasn’t sure if that was a lie or not. She did do what she wanted to do to her teacher all along but she wasn’t sure if it was enough.

Anya nodded and started talking about how her next party was going to look like. But Lexa didn’t really care. She couldn’t wait to go back to her teacher and see her again.

To see her one last time.

For now.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I surprised myself too with this soon update. First and last part are in Clarke's point of view this time!

‘You’d better’?

What was she thinking? Having sex with an eighteen year old? Her own student? Clarke covered her eyes with her hands. This was all so wrong.

But it felt so amazing so she couldn’t care less right now. She’s never felt so turned on in her life and she didn’t know whether it was because of Lexa and the way she touched and squeezed her body in the best way possible or because she just hadn’t had sex in a few months. Clarke closed her eyes and replayed in her head what just happened. _Crap_ it was turning her on again.

The way Lexa picked her up with her strong arms, laying her in the most gentle way possible into bed, dipping her long, thin fingers through the wetness in her panties, the way she kissed her breathlessly and took her nipples into her mouth like it was the only thing she was focused on. But it wasn’t. She was expertly touching her at exactly the right places. It felt so good that she had to stop Lexa when she reached for her clit. She wasn’t even slightly embarrassed, she was just so caught up in the moment. This girl knew what she was doing and it was _hot._

Clarke let out a deep sigh and took another bite of the pizza Lexa brought them an hour ago. She had just showered and was waiting for Lexa to come back.

She wasn’t done yet with Lexa. She knew she couldn’t claim the younger girl like that and ask her to stay here all day and night. But she wanted her to. She _needed_ her to. Even though she thought the sexual tension would get less between them, she was probably very wrong. After Lexa left she was left with a raging desire of getting fucked again by the younger girl.

Clarke let out another desperate sigh. She hated herself sometimes.

Maybe she should calm down a little and not get so turned on only thinking about Lexa. But you couldn’t blame her, she was desperate and when Lexa revealed herself, she tried not to lick her lips out of desire. She completely understood now why the girls were standing in line for her.

But it didn’t matter. After this night she was going to move back to LA, forget about her life here and move on.

She’s had one night stands before. No big deal. No biggie.

Clarke finished eating up the pizza and threw herself on the couch, her legs up. She had only put on a thong and a white, see-through tank top, no bra. She thought Lexa wouldn’t mind finding her like this.

Clarke was getting impatient as she watched tv, waiting for Lexa. It had been almost two hours now, but she didn’t want to disturb her quality time with her best friend.

She grabbed her phone from the table and stared at the text she got a few minutes ago. She hadn’t even noticed.

 

**Lexa 6:12 p.m.  
** _I can’t stop thinking about what just happened… Yet here I am, stuck at a restaurant._

Clarke let out a laugh and bit her lip.

 

**Clarke 6:37 p.m.  
** _Me neither… And here I am, almost naked, stuck at home._

**Lexa 6:40 p.m.  
** _Oh my god_

**Lexa 6:41 p.m.  
** _You’d better not be kidding_

**Clarke 6:42 p.m.  
** _Come find out yourself._

It just went so automatically, she hated it. But she loved it. It was only for tonight anyway.

 

**Lexa 6:47 p.m.  
** _I will in a few minutes. We just finished eating_

**Clarke 6:49 p.m.  
** _Hurry then_

Clarke couldn’t help it. She wanted to spend her time well before she left. She didn’t really know anybody else as well as she knew Lexa around here. It was just nice being around her. Although she was just beneath her, not around her.

A little while later she heard a few knocks on the door and she knew exactly who it was. Nobody ever knocked when they came to visit her. They always rang the bell. But not Lexa.

She swung the door open only to find the student in front of her with blushed cheeks and eyes widened, focused on everything but her eyes.

Clarke let out a chuckle and pulled her in for a kiss while she closed the door. Lexa pushed her against the door as she immediately deepened the kiss and slip her tongue into her mouth. Lexa always tasted so nice. Her lips were always so soft and right now they tasted like chocolate.

“Did you just have chocolate for desert?” Clarke laughed against her lips.

Lexa smiled back and nodded. “I fucking love chocolate.”  

She picked up Clarke again who was laughing and when she wanted to walk to the bedroom again, Clarke stopped her.

“Table.” Clarke demanded and Lexa happily obeyed after biting her lip so sexy.

She put her down on the table and settled between her legs again. Clarke already felt a bulge rocking between her legs.

“How was dinner?” Clarke mumbled against her lips.

Lexa stilled a moment and then smirked.

“Fine.”

“Yeah? Did you have fun?” She whispered against her lips in between kisses but Lexa ignored her.

“God you’re _so_ hot.” Lexa said and slowly got rid of Clarke’s thong.

She loved how experienced Lexa was. She loved the way Lexa knew what she was doing.

Lexa stopped a moment to take in the sight in front of her and Clarke smirked when Lexa licked her lips. She gently pushed Clarke down on the dinner table and widened her legs so she could have more access. Clarke was arched off the dinner table, hinting Lexa she needed her to touch her right now.

And Lexa did. She leaned forward and slowly ran her tongue up the left side of Clarke’s lips and up to her clit, whimpering as she tasted her. Clarke almost died when she felt Lexa’s wet tongue against her center, teasing her.

Clarke was so wet, she could feel it herself and when Lexa gave a long tentative lick up to her clit, she noticed how _sensitive_ and swollen it was.

Clarke’s face pointed up to the ceiling, her eyes closed as she enjoyed Lexa’s tongue working between her legs. Clarke was letting out desperate moans and she wanted Lexa to hear every single one of them. She wanted her to know what she was doing to her. She definitely made sure Lexa could hear each one of them. She even made sure her neighbors could hear each of them. Like she cared right now.

“So good.” Clarke breathed out and Lexa hummed.

Lexa repeated her motions over and over again, collecting all her juices up. She suddenly felt a death grip on her ankles as Lexa licked her folds up and down. Clarke noticed Lexa was enjoying this, too as she never came up for air and Clarke smirked at the thought.

Lexa’s tongue slipped so easily between her folds and Clarke’s moans were getting louder with every lick but when Lexa suddenly took her clit in her mouth and started sucking it, she probably woke up the whole neighborhood.

She wasn’t sure if Lexa just chuckled or not, but she kept sucking her exactly where she needed her and that was all that mattered. Clarke felt herself getting incredibly close and then a familiar tightness formed between her legs and she sat up to tangle her fingers in Lexa’s hair. Clarke’s thighs squeezed against Lexa’s head and as she let out the loudest cry, her hips started bucking up into Lexa’s mouth as she started to orgasm.

Clarke was a whimpering mess as Lexa finished her off. She didn’t stop licking her until Clarke was calm again and Clarke let herself fall on the dinner table. Lexa was still settled in between her legs and when she wiped off her mouth, she leaned in for a gentle kiss. She could still taste herself on Lexa’s lips. It was a bit salty and a great mix with chocolate.

Clarke was still out of breath when Lexa pulled off her tank top, not letting her rest for even one minute as she immediately took a nipple into her mouth.

Clarke softly moaned.

“You’re excited.” Clarke breathed out, smiling.

Lexa hummed against her nipple.

“You just. Really. Turned me on.” Lexa said in between licks and sucks.

Clarke let out a chuckle as she pushed herself up and pushed Lexa away from her. She stood up and immediately got rid of Lexa’s clothes, leaving her in her boxers.

“My turn.” Clarke groaned against her lips and took a good look at the bulge in her boxers. She bit her lip and she was only slightly scared that she would have trouble taking Lexa into her mouth. But mostly she was just really worked up about it.

She pulled her boxers off and her dick flopped out again. Lexa let out a content sigh at the relief.

“It’s been a while since I’ve done this.” She said calm. “But I really want to taste you.” She added whispering and Lexa only nodded in excitement.

Clarke settled between her legs and she noticed Lexa hardened even more as she did. Clarke noticed already a little pre-cum dripping out as she wrapped her hands around the base of her dick and used it as lubricant. She slowly started to move her hands up and down, teasing Lexa back. Clarke suddenly wrapped her mouth around the head of Lexa’s dick and she heard Lexa gasp loudly. Then she took more and more of Lexa’s length in her mouth, surprising herself that she fit every single inch of her in her mouth. She tasted so sweet and she’d never enjoyed wrapping her mouth around someone’s dick as right now.

Lexa moaned and tangled her fingers in her hair, gently guiding Clarke as she sucked it. Clarke released her dick to lick Lexa’s whole length only to suck her whole length in her mouth again. Clarke kept sucking her and then she pulled away for a second and jerked her off with her hands. She felt Lexa shake and whimper when she let out the most amazing moan she’d ever heard the brunette make.

Clarke was getting so turned on by the second and she found herself dripping again. She wanted to _feel_ Lexa between her legs.

“Clarke.” She breathed out as Clarke kept jerking her off.

“God. I need you inside of me.” She breathed out again as Clarke didn’t stop her movements.

Lexa smirked and helped her up to pull Lexa into a hot, messy kiss as she guided her to the dinner table again.

“Can you turn around for me?” Lexa asked almost shyly and Clarke nodded.

“Of course.” She leaned her front side on the dinner table, her feet still on the floor. As soon as she did Lexa didn’t waste any time to slip inside of her again and Clarke swore she saw stars for a minute. They both let out a deep moan and thank god Lexa stilled for a while to let her get used to her size.

Clarke started panting and her walls were clenching around Lexa’s length.

“Fuck.” Lexa breathed as she noticed and leaned her body against Clarke’s, kissing her spine up and down.

Clarke hummed in appreciation as she let Lexa do her lips the work on her back.

“Just relax.” Lexa softly instructed her and Clarke nodded.

Lexa was still kissing her spine and neck and Clarke was getting used more and more as she stretched her walls.

“Okay. You can move.” Clarke said and Lexa immediately did so.

She felt Lexa push into her and bottoming out and she was way deeper in this position than this afternoon. She felt Lexa grab her butt and squeeze it a few times which made Clarke whimper.

Clarke started moaning as Lexa started picking up her pace, pounding into her. She felt Lexa’s hips make tiny circles as she pushed into her and it felt so amazingly sweet. She couldn’t help it but her walls started clenching again around her dick which made Lexa groan softly. She loved the way she made Lexa feel. She wanted to make her feel good by the way she squeezed her dick and she thought she was doing pretty well because Lexa panted hard against her neck as she let out amazingly beautiful moans.

Suddenly Lexa grabbed her hips to keep Clarke down and Clarke started pushing back her hips to meet Lexa in the middle and the slapping sound of their skin together with their moans filled the room. She loved the way Lexa made her feel. She’s had one night stands before but this felt so amazing. She couldn’t remember anybody made her feel as good as Lexa did. The way she was able to choke her dick over and over again.

“You are so beautiful.” She heard against her skin and Clarke smiled wide.

“So are you.”

Lexa head a death grip on her hips and pounded into her like crazy. Clarke was close. Very close. She met Lexa in the middle and she thrusted back as hard as she could right when Lexa stilled for a mere second and then started shaking as she let out a loud cry, milking her release into Clarke. She moaned Clarke’s name and the moment she felt Lexa’s cum inside of her, it brought Clarke over the edge too. Clarke let out a loud cry as Lexa still slightly thrusted into her to let her ride out her orgasm.

Lexa fell on top of Clarke’s back, breathing heavily. She felt her bare breasts against her back and her skin was a little sweaty. She pressed a few lazy kisses down her back and they stayed there for a while in silence.

“You good?” Lexa asked.

“Yeah.” Was all she could bring out.

Lexa let out a content sigh after she calmed down a bit and she pulled out of Clarke which made Clarke gasp softly out of pleasure. Clarke got up and she already felt sore over her whole body. It wasn’t exactly a comfortable position leaning over the hard dinner table. Not that it mattered a few minutes ago.

Clarke suddenly felt two arms around her waist and wet kisses in her neck. She smiled as she wrapped her own arms around Lexa’s.

“That was fucking amazing.” Lexa said in between kisses and Clarke chuckled.

“It was alright.” Clarke said jokingly.

Lexa turned her around. “Alright?”

Clarke laughed and pressed a kiss against her lips, her arms around her neck.

She felt Lexa smile against her lips before she pulled away.

“But seriously. It was ‘alright’?”

Clarke rolled her eyes laughing.

“It was fucking amazingly alright, okay. Don’t be so confident about it.” She smiled against her lips and Lexa couldn’t help but kiss her again.

“Okay.” Was all she said and then pulled back from the kiss.

“I need some food.” Lexa said.

“Food? But you just ate.”

“Well, how else would you expect me to make you scream like that all night long.”

 

\----

 

Last night was absolutely hot and amazing. They finally fell asleep after the eighth time because they were absolutely exhausted. They fell asleep wrapped up in each other, Clarke nuzzled in Lexa’s neck as Lexa held her tight. They talked until they fell asleep. They talked about Lexa’s High School, music, their favorite dishes, their favorite movies, their past, Clarke’s dead, Lexa’s parents and Clarke’s record label. But those last things made Clarke feel a little sad so Lexa had changed the subject. There just was no other place she’d rather be than wrapped up into Clarke and listening to her stories. Listening to what she hated and what she loved most.

But right now she was really leaving. Clarke agreed that Lexa would take her to the airport this morning right after quickly showering together. They hadn’t done anything this morning besides naked cuddling and a few gentle kisses because they both overslept and Clarke was in a hurry. Then they had some breakfast and they rushed out to the airport. They hadn’t talked yet about the whole situation and what was coming next for them.

Lexa nervously sat down as she watched Clarke sit down beside her, keeping her distance because they were in public. They both waited in silence until Clarke could walk to her gate.

“You don’t have to wait, you know?” She heard Clarke say.

“It’s fine. I don’t have anything else to do on this Saturday morning.” She smirked softly.

Clarke smirked back and let out a shaky sigh. Lexa was scared to ask her but she had to. She had to know where they stood.

“So, what’s going to happen next? You know, between us.”

Clarke was already looking at her, worried eyes.

“I don’t know. What do you mean? We both agreed this would be a one-time thing, right? But we can still be friends. I’m not your teacher anymore.” She said a little sad.

Lexa nodded and swallowed thickly. “So, you got it out of your system like you intended? Like, you don’t want what we did last night anymore?”

Clarke shrugged. “Pretty much.”

Lexa nodded sadly. She knew she agreed to it, but she still expected she changed her mind or something. She knew she couldn’t let Clarke stay here just for her, but she was still secretly hoping for it.

“So I can still text you and stuff?”

Clarke nodded and smirked.

“Sure. We’re friends.”

Lexa nodded.

_“Passengers for flight 216, please enter your gate.”_

Clarke stood up and Lexa did too.

“Well, this is it I guess.” Clarke said and Lexa immediately hugged her. She didn’t care if anyone was watching. Her teacher surprisingly hugged her back for a long time and they stood silently for a while.

“When will I see you again?” Lexa asked quietly, pulling back.

“I don’t know, Lexa.”

“Will I ever see you again?”

“I don’t know. I don’t have the answer for everything. But I kind of hope we will see each other sometime again.”

Lexa nodded sadly.

“I hope so, too.”

Clarke gave her a warm smile when Lexa locked their eyes. She always looked so damn beautiful.

“Can I kiss you?” Lexa whispered.

Clarke shook her head. “It’s not a good idea.”

Lexa looked around her, looking for people she knew.

“Nobody will recognize us. Please?” She pouted.

“Lexa, no-”

“But you look so beautiful and I really want to kiss you goodbye in case I never see you again.” She said in one breath.

It seemed to be having convinced the blonde as she looked around them, searching for people they knew.

She carefully nodded and smirked softly. “Okay.”

Lexa was surprised she gave into it so easily and she quickly connected their lips before the blonde would change her mind.

Lexa grabbed her waist and pulled her close as Clarke automatically put her arms around her neck. The kiss was way more gentle and innocent that last night’s and even though Lexa knew they wouldn’t go any further than this, she gladly claimed her lips over and over again, taking in her taste as she wanted to remember it.

Clarke slowly pulled away after a while and put their foreheads together.

“God, what are you doing to me.” Clarke whispered and then quickly let her go and grabbed her suitcase.

Lexa frowned a little and her heart was pounding fast.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Lexa asked quietly.

“Nothing. I have to go. Take care of yourself, okay?” She walked away to the gate and left Lexa confused as ever.

“Take care of yourself, too.” She said, not sure if Clarke heard her.

 

\----

 

The weekend had passed and it was Monday again, another school day. Lexa and Clarke hadn’t been in contact since. Lexa wasn’t sure what to text her. She wanted to, but she didn’t know how to do this. Usually she would have a one night stand and she would never talk to the girl again.

But this was different. She missed her more than she thought she would. They were friends. Clarke turned out to be even one of her best friends. Of course she missed her.

Suddenly the bell rang and Mr. Collins spoke.

“Don’t forget about the concert next week, class. Please prepare yourself and read your classical music book as far as you can.”

Lexa was left last in class.

“What concert?” She asked him.

“The concert I told you about a few weeks ago. It’s mandatory that you go now that you passed this class.” He said dry.

“Oh, okay. What’s this concert about again?”

Her teacher sighed annoyed.

“You never pay attention in class, do you? It’s a classical music concert in LA. We’ll be there for only two days, Monday till Wednesday. Anything else Ms. Woods?” He said as he already packed his bag.

But Lexa had frozen at his words and she wasn’t sure if she had heard him correctly.

“LA?” She swallowed thickly.

“Is that a problem? School will pay for the flight and hotel.”

Lexa carefully shook her head.

“No. No.”

“Good.” He said and walked out of class.

How could she not remember anything about the concert? She totally forgot about it. But it didn’t matter. She had a good reason to text her teacher now, and if she was lucky enough, she would be able to meet up with her there. She wanted nothing else than to see her.

 

 

\----

 

Clarke had been crying for a few reasons this last week right before going to bed. For being scared about this whole musician thing because she signed a contract and she was all alone in this. For missing her dad who would support her. For wanting to tell Lexa but not being able to. For missing Lexa but not wanting to text her. For not being able to control her feelings for an eighteen-year-old student. For not knowing how sure she was about Lexa’s feelings for her.

She felt stupid. She had done something stupid but she didn’t regret one single second from that night. Hell, she didn’t regret one single second she spend with Lexa. She just had to pull herself together and face this. But she didn’t know what to do. She wanted to text Lexa and simply talk to her. Even call her, just to hear her soothing voice again.

She shook her head.

_What had she done to her?_

She had to stay away from Lexa as much as she could, but she felt like she was missing something this whole week. She missed having someone around who she could talk to about everything because she would understand her, even though she had her own friends back in LA. She missed the innocent pecks and hugs they gave each other before all of this. She missed talking to her and she missed seeing her. She missed all of that. She didn’t even wear the baseball jacket Lexa had given her as much anymore because it didn’t smell like her anymore. The only point of wearing it was by feeling like she was being wrapped up by Lexa sort of. Kind of.

She let out a deep sigh when she heard her phone buzz.

 

**Lexa 21:47 p.m.  
** _Hey Clarke, I hope you’re doing well over there. I’m doing fine, everything’s going great at school and I have my old music teacher back on Wednesday’s. Kind of really missing you since she’s nothing like you... Anyway, I’m going to LA to a concert for two days next Monday with Finn’s music class. I was hoping we could meet up one of those days? Only if you have time for it and if you’re up for it of course. We could talk a bit and spend some time together. Maybe even eat pizza? Anyway, text me back or even call me if you can to let me know. Goodnight for now._

And just like that, Clarke’s tears and the empty feeling in her chest were gone and her smile was out.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's all fluff, really.

**Clarke 22:14 p.m.  
** _Hi, Lexa. I’m glad to hear you’re doing fine. I’m well, I signed the contract a few days ago and I’ll be working a lot in studio’s these next few weeks. But of course, I’ll make sure to be free one of those days. Such a coincidence the concert is here ;) Maybe I’ll go as well, I’ve heard about a concert nearby._

**Lexa 22:23 p.m.  
** _Glad that everything’s working out for you. I would really love to see you at the concert, just know that Finn will be there as well. But, I’ll take any time to see you to be honest._

**Clarke 22:26 p.m.  
** _Oh thanks, I’ll think twice before deciding to go to the concert. I’ll let you know. And if I’m honest I still miss Portland and teaching music to students._

****  
Lexa 22:29 p.m.  
_Well, Portland misses you…_

**Clarke 22:30 p.m.  
** _Lexa, you can’t speak for Portland itself._

**Lexa 22:31 p.m.  
** _Says who_

**Clarke 22:32 p.m.  
** _Portland..?_

****  
Lexa 22:32 p.m.  
_Don’t speak for Portland itself_

**Clarke 22:33 p.m.  
** _I hate to admit this, but I’ve missed your terrible sense of humor._

**Lexa 22:35 p.m.  
** _Yeah well, my humor has that effect on people_

**Clarke 22:36 p.m.  
** _Always so smug. Listen, I’m really sorry but I’m truly exhausted ‘cause I haven’t slept well in days so I’m going to sleep, but I’m really glad you texted me. Hopefully I can see you in three days on Monday at the concert. We’ll be in touch._

****  
Lexa 22:38 p.m.  
_I’m sorry to hear that… You alright? Don’t hesitate to text or call me if you want to talk about anything. Sweet dreams and I hope to see you very soon_

 ****  
  
Clarke 22:39 p.m.  
_Still surprises me Lexa Woods can be so nice. But I’m alright, don’t you worry about me. Goodnight Lexa :-)_

**Lexa 22:39 p.m.  
** _:) Goodnight Clarke_

\----

 

Lexa just landed and she was a little too overexcited to see Clarke tonight at the concert. The blonde had decided she would come. Although Finn would be there too, Lexa wanted to see her as soon as possible.

They went to the hotel and she was sharing a room with this girl from music class, Harper. She had talked to her only once before and she thought she was pretty alright. She could always see Monty drooling over her when she walked by. Lexa always rolled her eyes at it as he told her over and over again that he didn’t have enough courage to go talk to her.

Lexa and her class went sightseeing the whole afternoon, then they had dinner together, they prepared themselves for the concert and then they walked to this huge concert building. All Lexa could think about was seeing the beautiful blonde again. She was glad she was able to come tonight, although she preferred some time alone with her. But, she wasn’t really complaining. As long as she would see her later tonight.

She had already texted Lexa that she was running late from the studio and that she needed to save her a seat, which Lexa would gladly do. They all went inside, Lexa’s heart was already racing as she sat down and saved Clarke a seat, just like she asked her to. She sat down right next to the entrance so Clarke could see her when coming in.

Suddenly the lights dimmed and only one spotlight was focused on the piano on stage. A man sat down behind it and then started playing piano. It was apparently a really big deal seeing this piano man, but Lexa didn’t even know him. She didn’t care.

She would’ve loved to see Clarke up there playing the piano. Now that would’ve been something she could watch and listen to for hours.

Time was passing by and the concert was almost finished when suddenly Lexa noticed someone sit beside her. She hadn’t even noticed someone entering but from the moment this person sat down, she could smell her. It was Clarke. The nice, sweet scent of her perfume mixed with her skin was something Lexa could never forget.

Lexa turned to her in the dark but she could barely see her face. She smiled at her anyway.

“Hey.” Clarke whispered. “Sorry I’m late. Had to wrap something up.”

There was the beautiful, raspy voice she had missed so much this week. Lexa smiled again.

“Don’t worry about it. You didn’t miss anything.”

Clarke snorted as she knew Lexa wasn’t interested in this concert at all. Lexa wanted to talk to her way longer than this, but someone in front of them already shushed them. They couldn’t even whisper around here and Lexa rolled her eyes.

They just sat next to each other in silence, watching the piano-man or whatever do his thing and for the first time tonight, Lexa wasn’t bored. Even though she could barely see the older woman, she could feel her presence. She would have loved to hug her or maybe even kiss her when she sat down, but she knew she couldn’t. Clarke probably didn’t want her to. They agreed they wouldn’t do that anymore.

But she still wanted to do something. She hated being so close to the blonde without even touching her. Without even giving her attention. She deserved all of Lexa’s attention.

Lexa side eyed Clarke as she carefully searched for her hand. She finally found her hand resting in her lap and reached for it as the blonde let out the tiniest, softest gasp when their hands touched.

Clarke then pulled Lexa’s hand into her lap as well as Lexa intertwined their fingers. She tried locking eyes with Clarke into the darkness and she smiled, caressing Clarke’s hand with her thumb. She believed to see Clarke was smiling back at her.

Lexa finally felt content and she let out a happy sigh. This was what she wanted all along. To really be around Clarke.

After a while the concert was almost over and she noticed Clarke moved closer to her every single minute. When their shoulders touched, Clarke let her head rest on Lexa’s shoulder. Lexa didn’t dare to move because she wanted to stay here forever.

She knew Clarke was enjoying this concert after all. She knew because every time the piano would sound difficult and tricky, she gently squeezed Lexa’s hand and other times she would let out the tiniest ‘ _wow’._

Lexa forced herself to fully focus on the blonde next to her as she didn’t know when she was going to see her again. Maybe right now was their last time together.

Why was she so drawn by this woman?

Suddenly everyone around them started clapping and Clarke only looked up to Lexa, not daring to let go off her hand. They were both staring at each other when the lights came on again. They both let each other go in less than a second and Clarke lift her head from Lexa’s shoulder, clapping as well now.

Lexa clapped as well and when she finally could take a good look at Clarke, she was the one letting out the tiniest ‘ _wow’._ Clarke hadn’t even noticed by all the clapping but Lexa didn’t care. Clarke looked so beautiful in her tight black jeans, high black heals, a red shirt that showed a bit of her cleavage and her hair down in waves, just a bit of makeup. But Lexa noticed small bags under her eyes. Clarke already told Lexa she hadn’t slept much this week but she hadn’t told her why. She would be lying if she said she wasn’t a little worried about her.

Clarke locked eyes with Lexa and she warmed her with her beautiful smile.

“Hi stranger.” Clarke said smiling.

Lexa laughed. “You look really beautiful.”

Clarke shyly smiled back and bit her bottom lip slightly which made Lexa smile, too.

“You don’t look so bad yourself.” She said laughing silently and Lexa smiled again.

They all stood up including Lexa’s class and they walked outside. Lexa’s class was gathering up and Clarke only followed her but they both knew she could never pass as a student between the rest.

“We’ll go back to the hotel once we’re complete. Tomorrow we gather at 9:00 a.m. in the dining hall.” Finn shouted and Clarke tried to hide herself behind Lexa.

But it was no use. Finn had already seen her.

“Clarke? Is that you?” He walked up to her.

“Oh, Finn, hi.”

“Hi, what a coincidence. What are you doing here?”

He wanted to go in for a hug but Clarke took a step back on time.

“I uh- I live here now. Just came to enjoy the concert.” She said awkwardly.

Lexa still stood in front of Clarke and she was following their conversation, but she acted like she wasn’t.

“Oh wow, that’s great. Great. You moved here just like that?”

“Oh, no. For a job.”

Finn nodded.

“I see. Great, that’s great.” He nodded. “So uh, I didn’t want to bring it up but you never called me back, you know?” He said lowly.

“Oh well, I was really Busy and stuff. New job.” She laughed nervously.

Lexa had never seen Clare being so awkward around someone. It was pretty clear she didn’t want to talk to him.

“Right, right. Well, if you want we can have a drink in a few minutes. Everyone will be going back to the hotel.”

Clarke laughed awkwardly. “Oh, you know Finn, I’m actually really tired right now and I just want to go home and get some sleep. It’s been a long day. Long week actually.”

Finn nodded again and scoffed. “Okay, sure. Yeah. Maybe another time.”

Clarke hesitated but then nodded.

“Alright well, I’ll text you another time. You look really great by the way. Beautiful as always.”

Did he just-?

“Thanks, Finn.”

Finn turned around and gathered his class when Lexa felt Clarke right behind her. She felt sorry for her teacher that it had been a long week for her. She looked like she could use some rest.

“Asshole.” Lexa mumbled. She tried hiding her total happiness and joy by the way Finn just got rejected by the most gorgeous woman on the planet.

“He didn’t do anything wrong.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow.

“I’m serious, Lexa.”

“He just asked you out again.”

“The fact that I don’t want him to ask me out, doesn’t make it wrong if he does.”

She was right. Just because she wanted Clarke for herself, didn’t mean Clarke wanted the same thing. It didn’t mean she couldn’t date other people. They weren’t even together. Not at all in fact.

Lexa hummed. “You’re just irresistible I guess.”

Clarke laughed.

“You have to be right. There is no other explanation.” Lexa was the one laughing now. “He’s an asshole though. Nothing will change that.” Clarke continued and Lexa nodded, hiding her smile.

The whole class started walking behind Finn and Clarke followed them for a while. Lexa and her were walking in the back so no one could see them.

“I have to turn left there.” Clarke pointed at the next street.

“Oh okay. We’ll be walking straight there.” She said slightly disappointed.

Clarke nodded and then yawned.

“You’re really tired, aren’t you?” Lexa noticed.

Clarke nodded.

“Well, just get some rest then. Hopefully you’ll sleep better tonight-”

“Would you maybe like to come with me for tonight? I mean, you could stay over if you want.”

Lexa stilled for a moment.

“Weren’t you tired?”

“Yes, but we’re just going to sleep, Lexa.”

“I know, but you just blew off Finn.”

“Yes, because it’s Finn.”

Lexa tried not to smile.

“Okay, I’ll come with you.”

She would fucking love to.

“I don’t want to get you in trouble though…”

“It’s fine. I’ll text my roommate so she can cover for me.”

Clarke nodded and they turned left where the rest kept walking straight.

“But you don’t want to spend some time with your roommate?” Clarke sounded a little insecure.

Lexa laughed a little. “Not really.”

“Okay.”

“Why would you think that?”

Clarke shrugged.

“I don’t know what you want.”

 _You._ Lexa thought. She wanted to be with her as much as she could.

“I told you, I want to spend some time with you now that I’m here.”

“Me too.” She breathed.

Lexa wished that she could stay more time here in LA. She didn’t know what would happen if she would fly back to Portland again. She didn’t know if she would ever see or talk to Clarke again.

“Here we are.” Clarke said tiredly after a short ten minutes.

Lexa looked up and the building looked nice. Really new and modern.

As soon as they entered Clarke’s apartment, Lexa noticed how well it was organized. She smiled in herself because she remembered Clarke’s apartment back in Portland was organized as well. It was very Clarke-like.

“Make yourself comfortable.” Clarke said sleepy as she hung up her coat and threw off her shoes. Lexa did the same as she followed the teacher to her bedroom. She started undressing herself in front of Lexa and she knew she had seen her naked before, but seeing Clarke in only her panties right now made her swallow thickly. She loved it though how comfortable she was around Lexa. Or maybe she was just really tired and didn’t care about the rest around her.

Clarke put on her pajamas which was just a tank top and some shorts (no bra of course and Lexa died a little) and Lexa undressed herself as well.

She was left in her boxers and also kept her shirt on because it was comfortable and keeping her warm. Clarke was already in bed, letting out the most tired sigh.

Lexa looked at the clock. 11:43 p.m. She quickly send Harper a text asking if she could cover for her. Done.

She climbed into bed next to the older woman and Lexa didn’t know if to keep her distance or not. She didn’t want to keep her distance. But her question was quickly answered by the blonde, nuzzling into Lexa’s neck as she put her arm on her stomach. Lexa smiled and put her arm around Clarke while her other hand rested on Clarke’s hand that rested on Lexa’s stomach.

Clarke let out a content but sleepy sigh.

“Clarke?” Lexa whispered.

“Hm?” She breathed.

“Are you okay?”

It took a while before Clarke answered her.

“Yeah. Just tired. Don’t worry.”

But Lexa knew otherwise. She could hear it by every tone in her voice. She wasn’t okay.

“You want to talk about it?” Lexa tried again.

Clarke let out a shaky sigh and waited again before finally answering.

“No. Not right now.” She admitted.

Lexa let out a sigh and pulled the woman incredibly closer. She knew this was what Clarke needed right now. She didn’t need to be interrogated right now.

“Then what can I do for you right now?” Lexa whispered softly and Clarke remained silent again. She needed to do something. There had to be something. It was killing her that Clarke felt this way and she couldn’t do anything about it.

She heard Clarke sigh slightly. Then Clarke looked up at her in the dark and she waited a moment before leaning in and taking Lexa’s lips into her mouth. Lexa let out a shaky whimper as she tasted the familiar sweetness again after all these days. It was a lazy kiss, like she kissed her with the last bit of energy she had. Lexa gladly kissed her back gently and let Clarke take control. On her own pace. She had missed this. She had missed her.

It didn’t last very long but it made Lexa feel a little at peace again. Clarke pulled back and nuzzled into her neck again and held Lexa a bit tighter right now.

“Just cuddle me.” Clarke said and Lexa gladly did.

Lexa didn’t feel like saying anything. She knew the blonde would talk to her if she wanted to. She didn’t want to push her and Lexa only placed a gentle kiss on Clarke’s forehead.

“I’m here for you.” Lexa whispered and she heard Clarke let out a sleepy but content sigh.

It didn’t take long for them to fall asleep in each other’s arms.

 

\----

 

7:30. She looked right next to her and noticed Lexa almost laying on top of her. She was holding her close. It was absolutely comforting and she wanted to stay here forever. In the younger student’s arms. Lexa looked so adorable when she was asleep. The tiny little sounds she let out in her sleep made Clarke chuckle and she pressed a tiny kiss to her lips to wake her up.

She couldn’t help herself. This week had been so exhausting that she was incredibly thankful Lexa could make her feel like herself again. She’s slept better last night and she didn’t know whether she was too tired or because Lexa was holding her as close as possible.

She was enjoying being in the studio so much, but she would be there twelve hours or more a day. She’d never felt so exhausted in her life in less than a week. But making music was what she absolutely loved to do and she shouldn’t feel like she was still missing something and this feeling disappeared when she saw Lexa again last night. She had everything here in LA. She shouldn’t feel like this. It was scary feeling like this.

She hated and at the same time loved that Lexa was taking care of her like this although she couldn’t ask that from her. She had her own life back in Portland. Her own life with her own friends at High School. _God_ , she was still in High School. She just needed LA, her own friends and her new job to be there for her. She couldn’t depend on Lexa. She wasn’t around all the time.

Lexa’s eyes fluttered open as she immediately locked them with Clarke’s and Clarke smiled.

“Good morning.” Clarke whispered.

“Morning. Did you just kiss me?” Lexa said sleepy.

Clarke grinned and nodded.

“Sorry.”

“No, don’t be. Just thought it happened in my dream is all.”

Clarke chuckled and moved their noses together.

“Did you sleep better tonight?” She asked softly.

“I kind of did.”

Lexa nodded and smirked.

“I have to go to the studio.” Clarke said, eyes closed.

Lexa nodded.

“And I need to go sightseeing again or whatever. Maybe listen to another man behind a piano.”

Clarke laughed out loud.

“The concert was pretty fun, you know.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and laughed. “Not until you came.” She said quietly.

Clarke’s stomach fluttered and she wanted to kiss Lexa again, but she didn’t.

Instead she let out a sigh and laid her hand in Lexa’s neck and her head on her chest. She could hear Lexa’s heartbeat racing.

“Am I going to see you today?” Lexa asked low.

“If you want.”

“I do.”

“Okay.”

“Do you?”

 _Do you?_ Of course she did. She wanted Lexa to know she didn’t have to ask that anymore. And she had to talk about it to Lexa, because she knew that whatever they were doing, wasn’t what just friends did. She had to talk about the way she felt. About maybe not kissing or cuddling each other anymore. Or maybe to do it way more often. She hadn’t decided yet. She hadn’t figured out how this would work.

But not right now. Probably later today when she would see her again, before Lexa left to Portland again. She just had to talk to her before she left.

“Of course.”

She felt Lexa smile against her forehead before pressing a soft kiss there. She absolutely loved when she did that, just like she did last night. It always made her stomach flutter when she did that.

Clarke stood up and Lexa let out a disapproving sound. She undressed herself and put some clothes on in front of Lexa. Just like last night when she was left in only a pair of panties to put on her pajamas, Lexa’s eyes were fully focused on her. Clarke knew she would have that effect on her and she loved it. She loved the way she looked at her like it was the first time she’d seen a girl naked.

“So, I could come over tonight again if you’d like? We have some free time tonight since we fly back tomorrow morning.”

“I’m not sure at what time I’ll be home tonight, but I could text you? You could stay here for tonight again if you’d like?”

She saw Lexa nodding.

“I would like that very much.”

Clarke smiled.

“Okay, well. I’m going to head out ‘cause I’m kind of running late again. But I’ll see you tonight.”

Lexa stood up and walked up to Clarke and Clarke felt a little nervous by it. She wondered if Lexa always slept with a t-shirt and her boxers on.

“Okay.”

The younger girl put her arms around her for a while as Clarke did the same. The hugged each other for a while before Clarke pulled back. She was really running late.

“I’ll text you.” She repeated

Lexa nodded and quickly captured Clarke’s lips. Clarke hoped she would do that and cupped her cheeks for a mere second before remembering this wasn’t what friends did. But also she couldn’t bring herself to care for now.

“I’m running late.” Clarke smiled against her lips and Lexa nodded.

She loved that Lexa always kissed her goodbye. She always kept thinking about it and smiling dumbly on her way to wherever she was going. Just like she was going to do in a minute on her way to the studio. But did she ever admit that to herself? Absolutely not.

“Okay. I’ll see you tonight then.” Lexa smiled and pecked her lips one more time.

“I trust that you won’t steal anything from me.” Clarke said jokingly.

Lexa laughed. “You’ll never know.”

Clarke smiled at her one last time as she walked out the door but she kept herself smiling all the way to the studio, just like she predicted.

Damn. She definitely had to talk to Lexa tonight.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to rewrite this chapter because I wasn't happy with it so sorry for the delay...  
> Enjoy anyway!

She had to talk to Clarke. What they were doing wasn’t what friends did, they had agreed on it before. They weren’t having sex now but this still wasn’t right. After Clarke left this morning, Lexa was left with a burning desire to do more than just kissing Clarke, but she didn’t. Although she deliciously fell asleep with Clarke in her arms last night.

Her classmates and her were sightseeing and Harper, Monty and her formed a little group together, mostly ‘cause the rest of her classmates didn’t like Lexa. They knew she wasn’t just there for her music passion but because she had to. But Harper and Monty didn’t seem to mind. Monty was way too busy focusing to impress Harper anyway.

Lexa wasn’t that focused on the sightseeing either. She texted Clarke a few hours ago but she hadn’t texted her back yet. She was probably too busy, Lexa guessed.

They did some more sightseeing and the whole class ate a little at a café near the concert hall. They sat down and ate something when Lexa felt her phone buzz in her pocket.

 

**Clarke 15:34 p.m.  
** _I’m just taking a break but I’ll be home late. I need to fill in some papers here apparently. I’ll text you later?_

**Lexa 15:36 p.m.  
** _Okay sure, no problem_

Lexa sighed and took a bite of her sandwich. She couldn’t wait that long.

She had a talk with Monty and Harper but soon they had a talk with just the two of them. Logical, Lexa thought. At least they could spend time together, even though Monty was making a fool of himself in front of Harper. Lexa ordered and ate another sandwich and when she looked up she saw someone familiar enter the café. It took less than three seconds before they locked eyes and Lexa smiled wide.

It was Clarke. Probably getting some coffee because she looked tired again but not as tired as yesterday. Clarke was wearing some black jeans and a simple red blouse with a pair of sneakers. Lexa had never seen the blonde with sneakers before but it suited her. She looked so pretty.

Clarke smiled back at her, looking surprised, but she remained calm. She ordered herself a coffee just like Lexa predicted and then locked eyes again with Lexa.

They had to be careful. Monty and Finn were here. They would recognize Clarke so Clarke couldn’t just come up to Lexa and say hi. Luckily Finn was at the end of the table and Monty was too busy embarrassing himself in front of Harper. That’s when Lexa saw her chance to get up and tell her… friends she went to the bathroom.

She walked right past Clarke, never taking their eyes off each other as Lexa hinted her she was going to the bathroom. At least they had some privacy there. Lexa felt a sudden rush in her body as she walked past Clarke. It felt so secretive and hot.

Lexa waited no longer then seventeen seconds (not that she was counting) until Clarke also came in. Not the greatest spot to meet up, but at least she could see her now privately.

“Hi.” Lexa said as she took a step closer and wrapped her hands around the blonde. Clarke put her arms around her neck and hugged her.

“I like when you hug me.” Lexa groaned into her neck.

She felt Clarke nod and chuckle. “Me too.”

Clarke took a step back, never letting go of Lexa’s neck and locked her hands behind it. She sure was tinier without her heels.

“Well, what a coincidence. Or are you stalking me?” Lexa frowned jokingly.

Clarke rolled her eyes and laughed.

“Ah, you see right through me.” She smiled softly and Lexa felt a sudden rush again looking at her beautiful smile that could brighten up her day.

She thought it was okay what she was about to do so she didn’t waste any time before closing the gap between them by pulling Clarke’s waist closer and kissed her. Clarke immediately responded and sucked her bottom lip into her mouth. It was a gentle kiss and soon they broke apart again. Too soon.

Lexa pouted and Clarke let out a chuckle.

“Someone could come in any second.” Clarke made clear and Lexa nodded.

“I want to talk about this.” Lexa said as she rested her forehead against Clarke’s.

Lexa gently squeezed Clarke’s waist when she nodded. “Okay.”

“Tonight?”

Clarke nodded. “Tonight.”

Clarke let her go and took a step back but Lexa didn’t let go of her hand as she stopped her.

“Wait, you’re leaving already?”

Clarke let out another chuckle and walked back to Lexa. Then she placed a smiley, long peck to her lips, leaving Lexa a little speechless.

“That good enough?” She raised an eyebrow and wanted to walk away again but Lexa pulled her back again and captured her lips once again.

“Can’t you just stay for a little while longer?” Lexa mumbled against her lips and Clarke smiled.

“I’ll see you tonight. I have to head back to the studio.” She said in between kisses and then pecked Lexa’s lips once more before she walked away.

Lexa put her hands in her pocket and watched Clarke leave. She hated that she had to leave already, but she understood she was busy.

She let out a deep sigh and waited a few seconds before she walked out of the bathroom again. She searched for Clarke but she was already gone.

 

\----

 

Lexa waited and waited and she had to get up at six in the morning to catch their flight back to Portland. She didn’t receive a text from Clarke till almost midnight.

 

**Clarke 11:39 p.m.  
** _I just got home. I know it’s late and I don’t know if you’re still awake… But if you want you can still come over._

**Lexa 11:40 p.m.  
** _On my way_

Lexa didn’t hesitate and snuck out of the hotel, remembering the way to Clarke’s apartment. She got there in less than ten minutes and when Clarke opened the door sleepily in her pajamas, she had a feeling they wouldn’t talk very much.

“Hey.” Clarke said sleepily.

“Evening.” Lexa said as she walked in.

“Sorry, I had no idea it was going to be this late when I got home. But I’m glad you’re here anyway.” She said as she didn’t know how fast to crawl back into bed.

Lexa followed her after she threw off her shoes.

“It’s okay. Are you okay though? You seem really tired.”

Lexa knew this job was too much for Clarke. From what she had heard, it would probably be too much for anyone, really. Being for over twelve hours in the studio seemed weird and not acceptable. But what did she know.

“I am.” She said with a yawn and scooted closer to Lexa. She nuzzled into her neck as Lexa put her arms around her. She placed a gentle kiss on her forehead and Clarke let out a content sigh. She had a feeling Clarke loved when Lexa did that.

“We could talk tomorrow morning?” Lexa proposed.

“Okay.” Clarke said softly.

“My plane leaves in six hours.”

“What??” Clarke sat up straight in bed, eyes wide. “I’m not reasonable at that time in the morning. Let’s just talk now.” She sighed.

Lexa nodded in agreement, already missing Clarke’s touch.

“You go first.” Clarke suggested.

“Me? Why me? Ladies first. You go first.”

“What? You’re a lady, too.” Clarke protested.

“Yes but you’re prettier.”

“Lexa, that doesn’t make any sense.”

“I just- I don’t necessarily need to go first.” She almost whispered and before Clarke could say something back, she spoke again. “But fine then. I’m a grown up. I’ll go first.”

Clarke nodded carefully.

Lexa awkwardly put her hand in her neck and cleared her throat. “So uh, how are you?”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Lexa…”

“Okay, alright. Fine.”

Another deep, deep sigh.

“I just don’t know how to do this. It’s all so weird.”

“What is?”

“This whole situation is. What we are doing now is not what friends do, Clarke. We’ve agreed on it many times now. And we could just keep fucking around, you know? Keep it casual.”

Coward. That wasn’t what she actually wanted to say.

“How are we going to do that if you’re miles away from me?”

“I mean- You could, like, become my girlfriend? Or something.”

 _Crap._ She screwed up now.

Clarke raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

“No?” Lexa had a painful look on her face.

“Gee, such a romantic.” Clarke sounded a little annoyed.

“No, I mean.” Another sigh. “I don’t know what you want. Just say something.”

Clarke shrugged. “I know what I want but I don’t know if this is going to work.”

“What do you want?”

“To answer your question from just now: yes. I would like to give it a try between us because- Because of obvious reasons.”

“What reasons?”

Clarke sighed. “I kind of don’t like admitting this, but I feel something for you. I like you. And you make me brighten up my days and stuff. You know, after a day like this I really love coming home to you.”

Lexa smiled wide and saw a tiny awkward glance from the woman next to her.

“But, you’re eighteen. And we’re so far apart from each other.”

Lexa nodded. “Stop with the age thing. You told me it didn’t matter. And you’re right, but to be honest, I’d rather try this with you even if we’re miles apart then letting you go. I just can’t do that, it doesn’t matter how hard I try not to think about you. I really like you.”

Clarke warmed her with a smile and she put her arm around Lexa’s waist.

“That was really sweet.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Lexa tried hiding her smile.

“You know, we don’t even have to label ourselves. I mean, we could just see if this works out, right?” Clarke proposed.

Lexa hummed. “That might be a reasonable solution for now.”

Clarke smiled and gently cupped Lexa’s cheek.

“So, we’re not girlfriends, but we are… dating?” Clarke clarified.

“Yeah. That could work.”

“Okay. Does that mean I won’t get a text from this Ontari girl from your phone anymore?”

Lexa snorted.

“Already jealous?”

“No.” She hesitated. “Just need to be clear about this stuff.”

Lexa chuckled, not believing her… date? Dating girl? “Sure. And no, I won’t sleep around or see other people if you don’t do it either.”

Clarke shook her head. “I won’t. Not until we figure this out.”

“Deal.”

“Deal.”

Lexa smiled and leaned in to kiss her.

“Does that mean-” Kiss. “That we can-” Kiss. “Fool around like we did before you left?” Last kiss before Clarke’s eyes faded dark.

“Yes.” She whispered. “But not right now. I’m a mess and way too tired.”

Lexa pouted. “But it’s the last time before I leave.”

“Lexa, I promise to make it up to you the next time I see you. I will make it worth the wait, I promise.” She whispered husky and Lexa shivered at those words.

“Okay. You’d better stick to that promise.”

Clarke nodded. “I never break my promises. Promise.” She smiled.

Lexa laughed at her silliness and kissed her once again.

“Maybe I can help you relax a little though.” Lexa groaned against her lips and she moved her hands carefully down to Clarke’s panties.

Clarke only hummed tiredly.

“I’m sleepy.” She whispered.

“You won’t have to do anything, I just want to taste you. Let me take care of you.” She said softly and it didn’t take long before Clarke hummed in approval as she pulled Lexa on top of her. She pulled her in a hot kiss with every bit of last energy she had before Lexa dipped her fingers into her panties. She already felt a great wetness and they had barely touched.

“Who said you were sleepy?” Lexa whispered against her lips and received a smile from Clarke.

“Sleepy, but turned on.”

Lexa smiled and kissed her again as she expertly started circling her clit. Clarke let out a soft moan and arched her back. Lexa lifted her shirt up just enough to reveal Clarke’s beautiful, big round breasts and she didn’t waste any time to pull a pink hard nipple into her mouth.

They both moaned at the feeling and suddenly Clarke widened her legs for Lexa, hinting her she wanted more. Lexa didn’t need any hint more and lowered her mouth, leaving a trail of wet kisses on Clarke’s neck, chest, breasts, belly and thighs.

She pulled of her panties and she loved that she was totally in control. When Clarke revealed her wetness, Lexa just wanted to taste it. She had missed her scent, her taste and everything that belonged to Clarke. She saw Clarke was glistening in front of her and licked her lips. She couldn’t wait to taste her and Clarke only hinted her once more by widening her legs again. Lexa smiled at her tired effort and helped her by spreading her thighs apart.

She leaned down and replaced her fingers with her tongue, working on her clit. As soon as she tasted her, they both moaned loudly. She tasted so good.

Lexa sucked on her clit a few times before she teased with one finger against her entrance. She didn’t slip into her, she wanted to wait until Clarke would beg her with the last bit of energy she had.

Lexa sucked on her clit again when she felt Clarke’s hand in her hair and when she looked up for a split second, she saw Clarke sitting up instead of laying down, pulling her closer to her center as she let out beautifully formed moans. Lexa felt she was already painfully hard, but this was about Clarke. She focused completely on Clarke.

She loved eating Clarke out. She loved every single second of it, especially when Clarke let her take control. She had learned soon enough a week ago what she liked in bed. She liked when Lexa put her long slick fingers inside of her, she liked when she hit that spongy place inside of her with her fingers or her dick, she liked when Lexa placed kisses on that sensitive spot in her neck that made her come twice as fast, she liked when she grabbed her breasts and massaged them but she absolutely _loved_ when Lexa took a nipple into her mouth. The brunette had learned quickly that those were the most sensitive parts of the older woman’s body. She loved those the most, too.

Clarke was only pulling her closer to her as she let out gasps and moans and whimpers as Lexa worked between her legs. She still teased Clarke’s entrance with her finger when she heard the magical word.

“Lexa, please.”

Lexa didn’t need to hear more and with one thrust she had one finger inside of her. She felt Clarke’s walls clench at the feeling as she let out a shaky, raspy moan above her.

“More.” Clarke immediately begged and Lexa knew exactly what she meant.

She added another finger but when Clarke shook her head, she for once didn’t know what she meant.

“Another.” She made clear and it turned on Lexa so much she almost came in her boxers.

Lexa did as she was told and carefully added finger number three. Clarke clenched non-stop around her fingers as she hotly locked eyes with Lexa. Lexa swallowed thickly and started moving inside of her, her thumb working on her clit.

Clarke’s moans were getting louder with every thrust and Lexa stared at her the whole time as she grabbed and pinched her own nipples. _Fuck_ being in control _._ Clarke helping herself was hot as fuck.

“Lexa.” She breathed out as she massaged her own breasts over and over again.

“You’re so hot.” Lexa whispered and redoubled her efforts.

When Lexa curled her fingers inside of her she felt Clarke completely shake and freeze at the same time against her. She cried out one last moan and that was it. Clarke drenched Lexa’s fingers with her wetness as she orgasmed around Lexa’s fingers. It took all of Lexa’s strength and willpower as Clarke almost pushed her fingers out of her with her walls but Lexa could stay inside as she rode out her orgasm.

Not one second did she take her eyes off Clarke, enjoying the way she bit her lip, back arched, thrusted her hips, cried out and let herself fall back to bed, out of breath.

Lexa pulled out of her and took a look at her drenched fingers. Clarke looked at her and Lexa saw it as a chance to lick her fingers off, letting her know that she wasn’t afraid of a bit of mess.

“Fuck.” Clarke breathed and she pulled Lexa back on top of her again, kissing her and tasting herself as she ran her tongue over her bottom lip.

Lexa hummed and then collapsed on top of her.

“I’m dead.” Clarke breathed out and Lexa chuckled as she kissed her nose and then settled beside her.

“Let’s go to sleep then.” She whispered and Clarke nuzzled back into her neck, hand straddling Lexa’s hips. Lexa only held her tighter and it didn’t take long for both of them to pass out.

 

\----

 

Last night she had dreamed about Clarke. About what happened last night. She imagined all these happy scenarios where they were together. But they weren’t. Lexa was already leaving.

She chickened out last night. She wanted to call Clarke her girlfriend, but she understood the older woman wanted to go slow with that label for now. They were both scared. But this meant there wasn’t much pressure to their relationship yet and that was something they both needed.

It felt like Lexa blinked only once before her alarm went off. Clarke was practically still asleep when Lexa kissed her forehead and said she was leaving.

Clarke sleepily sat up in bed and yawned, her eyes half closed.

“Go back to sleep. I’ll text you later today.” Lexa whispered.

“Call me when you get home.” She pulled Lexa’s collar closer and kissed her goodbye a few times.

“I will.” She mumbled against her lips.

“Have a safe trip, babe.” Clarke let out sleepily and pecked her lips one more time before she crawled back into bed.

Lexa’s heart fluttered at the nickname and she didn’t know whether Clarke meant it or if she was just half asleep when she said it.

“Babe?” Lexa asked.

“Hm?” She mumbled sleepily.

Lexa smiled. Clarke probably thought she just called Clarke babe. But she just really wanted an explanation. It didn’t matter, she could get used to hearing and using the nickname now.

“Sleep tight.” She kissed her forehead once more and Clarke let out another content sigh.

She was going to miss the blonde.

 

\----

 

The trip was pretty awful. She didn’t want to leave yet. But when she got on the plain, there was no going back anymore. When they landed she said goodbye to Monty and Harper who were apparently together or something and went home. Something must have happened between them when Lexa was at Clarke’s last night she figured.

Lexa got home in the evening, tired and hungry but she couldn’t wait to call Clarke. She wanted to see her so she figured FaceTime was a better plan. She dialed Clarke’s number and called her. She just hoped she would pick up.

And she did. Clarke’s face popped up on screen and Lexa’s smile immediately appeared. _Damn_. She looked so gorgeous again.

“Hi, beautiful.” Lexa said as she laid down in bed.

Clarke smiled and took a bite from whatever she was eating. It looked potato-ish.

“Hey babe.”

She smiled at hearing the word again. Lexa figured Clarke wasn’t half asleep anymore and she knew exactly what she was saying. Clarke noticed Lexa’s smile.

“It’s okay to call you that, right?” Another bite.

Lexa nodded.

“Of course.”

Clarke smiled in approval.

“So, you just got home?” Clarke asked.

“Yeah. Just landed myself in bed.”

Clarke playfully raised an eyebrow.

“Hmm. Wish I could join you.” She said as she slowly took another bite of her food.

Lexa swallowed thickly.

“Yeah? What would you do?”

Clarke shrugged and let her fork rest in her mouth before she started talking.

“Probably sleep.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “You’re no fun.”

Clarke laughed and Lexa would do anything to hear that laughing sound again.

“So, you just got back from the studio?” Lexa asked.

“Like, half an hour ago. Finally.”

Lexa nodded and watched Clarke on her screen as she put her finished plate in the kitchen and grabbed herself a glass of water.

“You’re so pretty.” Lexa breathed out.

Clarke chuckled.

“I’m just drinking my water.”

Lexa smiled.

“I miss you.” Lexa said.

“Wow, who would’ve guessed Lexa Woods was so affectionate.” She let out a laugh. “But, I miss you too. I wished you were here tonight so I could come home to you and cuddle you. Then we would have some dinner together, probably pizza. And then we would watch a stupid movie which both of us wouldn’t be interested in anyway. Then I’d kiss you a few times.”

Lexa sat up straight.

“And then?”

Clarke zoomed in on her lips and whispered.

“And then…”

Lexa licked her lips and focused on Clarke’s lips as she breathed out her next words.

“We would get some sleep.” Clarke finished and started laughing like a little child.

“Oh my god, you’re so boring.” She said before she started laughing as well.

“I’m kidding. I would probably suck your dick.”

Lexa almost choked on her own spit. Clarke could be so direct sometimes.

“Now that sounds like a plan.”

Clarke chuckled once again.

“I’ll miss you tonight. I think I’ll just cuddle my pillow or something and pretend that it’s you.”

Lexa smiled.

“I’ll miss you, too. I think I’ll just cuddle myself.”

“Sure. Some self-love is important, too.” Clarke laughed and rolled her eyes. “I’m going to get some sleep. I’ll be up early tomorrow again.”

“Okay. Sweet dreams.” Lexa smiled softly.

“Goodnight, babe.” She winked and they both stupidly kissed their camera’s so it looked like they were kissing each other before they hung up.

She had it so bad.

Right before Lexa put on her pajamas and wanted to go to sleep as well, her phone buzzed.

Her face light up when she saw Clarke had texted her. It was a picture.

Lexa gasped loudly as she felt herself getting so turned on. By just one picture. Of Clarke. Shirtless. Braless. Touching her naked breasts. With a wink emoji. _Godammit._ She couldn’t believe she started to feel herself getting hard by just this picture. She had been so worked up since last night and she hadn’t had the chance to take care of it yet. But she was definitely going to now.

**Lexa 11:46 p.m.  
** _Jesus you’re gorgeous. Who’s gonna take care of me now?_

 

**Clarke 11:48 p.m.  
** _Me, if you pretend your hand is my mouth._

Lexa choked back a moan and she reached down to grab her shaft. She sure was going to.

 


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little twist and I hope you like it!

It all felt so new. She had never done this before, a long distance relationship. Or even a relationship at all that included more than just sex. At least, she thought this included more than just sex. Although the sex was pretty fucking great.

They had been talking every day for almost a week straight. Usually Clarke was up way earlier than Lexa so Clarke was almost always the one to type a good morning text. Lexa would always wake up with a smile on face.

Also, because of the texting, they had become closer. Lexa was enjoying every single bit from it, except for the part that she couldn’t see or touch her in real life. Simply kiss her good morning or good night, hugging her after a long day at work, taking her out for dinner. The pet name ‘babe’ or ‘baby’ had become a familiar saying in their conversation, but that didn’t stop Lexa’s heart from fluttering every time she heard (or read) Clarke say it (or type it). It felt a little like she was a little bit Clarke’s anyway.

She still had to take her out on a date. Lexa hadn’t brought it up yet because it could become serious soon after that and she didn’t know it was something Clarke wanted. Not when they were miles apart and only one week… dating? Or something. She didn’t know when they would have the chance to see each other again.

And Clarke sure had been working a lot. Lexa started telling that it wasn’t good for her mental health. But Clarke kept replying that this was all she had. When Lexa wanted to tell her that she also had _her,_ she bit her tongue. Nobody had nobody.

A buzz snapped Lexa back into real life. She secretly checked at dinner at home, trying not to get busted by her mom. She never approved the idea of texting while having dinner.

 

**Clarke 18:11 p.m.  
** _Pasta or salad?_

Lexa chuckled silently. When Clarke couldn’t decide what to eat, she would always text Lexa, asking her for her opinion. Lexa loved it although she knew some people might have found it annoying when their partner would do that. But it made Lexa feel like she was part of her life there in LA anyway.

Lexa carefully texted back, her mom not noticing.

 

**Lexa 18:13 p.m.  
** _Both_

**Clarke 18:14 p.m.  
** _Salad it is_

**Lexa 18:15 p.m.  
** _Just a salad? Not even pizza? Are you sick?_

**Clarke 18:16 p.m.  
** _Ha ha very funny. I’m just trying NOT to gain pounds. Even lose some pounds_

Lexa frowned. Why did she want to do that? Lexa loved every single sexy curve of Clarke’s body. She looked so beautifully feminine and curvy just the way she was.

 

**Lexa 18:19 p.m.  
** _I hope you’re kidding. You look perfect, why would you want to lose weight?_

**Clarke 18:20 p.m.  
** _For rocking my bikini in the summer?_

Lexa swallowed thickly. Clarke in a bikini. O god.

 

**Lexa 18:21 p.m.  
** _You’ll rock anything with your body as it looks like right now. Again, you look perfect_

Next thing Clarke send her an image. It was a picture of food. Her food. It was pasta and salad.

 

**Clarke 18:22 p.m.  
** _You need to stop convincing me so easily_

Lexa laughed without noticing and her mom cleared her throat.

 

**Lexa 18:23 p.m.  
** _Enjoy baby, you deserve it after a long day of work *kissy face emoji*_

**Clarke 18:23 p.m.  
** _:) Thanks babe, you too!_

 

Fluttering heart.

 

“Lexa!” Indra shouted.

Lexa jumped at the sudden voice and put her phone away.

“No phone.”

“Sorry.”

“You know the rules.”

“Yeah, sorry.”

Lexa quickly started eating again and almost spit out her food.

“Ugh it’s cold.”

Indra raised one eyebrow and nodded.

“That’s on you. What was so important that couldn’t wait until after dinner?”

_My kind of girlfriend but not really asked my opinion on what she should eat._

“Nothing.” Was all Lexa said.

“Nothing, but you were smiling at your phone.”

Lexa’s cheeks felt hot all of a sudden as she continued eating her cold food.

“Silence can be an answer, too. I just wished you would’ve told me.”

“Told you what?”

“About your girlfriend. The one from music class, was it?”

“Oh my god, no mom.”

“Okay then.” She stood up as she started doing the dishes.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That you should trust me whenever you want to talk.”

Lexa sighed and decided to let it go. She went upstairs, checking if Clarke had texted her and she wasn’t disappointed when she saw she did.

 

**Clarke 18:45 p.m.  
** _I’ll call you later tonight, okay? I need to share how great this pasta tasted._

 

Lexa chuckled again.

 

**Lexa 18:51 p.m.  
** _Can’t wait._

\----

At school, from one day to another, things had changed. Not specifically for Lexa, just her surroundings. And she found two of those things out the next day on Monday, during lunch break.

“We’re together!” Harper blurted out and happily came to hug Lexa which definitely caught her by surprise.

“You and Monty?” Lexa breathed as Harper luckily let her go before she couldn’t breathe.

“Yes. He is so cute and adorable. He asked this weekend if I wanted to be his girlfriend. So cute.”

Lexa cringed a little and didn’t feel like hearing about these cute and adorable moments together, but she still was happy for them. She was proud of Monty. Maybe even jealous they could actually be together. Not that she admitted that.

“That’s great. Congratulations.” Lexa said genuine. Then she saw Monty walking towards them, a big smile on his face. He came to hug Harper from behind and kisser her deep, sloppy and disgustingly.

“I still need to eat.” Lexa hinted and they both parted laughing.

Lexa stood up and went to grab herself a coke. She was thirsty today. “I’ll be right back.” She told the new couple and walked over to the vending machine.

Monty and Harper had been invited by Lexa during lunch break with her friends. Her friends didn’t like it at first ‘cause they were ‘music geeks’ but as soon as they started to actually like them, they didn’t mind anymore. Monty would always sit alone anyway.

Lexa put a coin in the vending machine and waited patiently until she could press the button she wanted for her coke. She patiently looked around when her smile grew wide as she saw Raven and Anya.

She grabbed her coke after pushing the button and walked back. It was only then that she noticed they were walking hand in hand. Lexa frowned. They sure were close as best friends but she’d never seen them doing this before. Not at school. Or in public at all.

They all sat down and both Raven and Anya noticed Lexa then, frowning at them.

“Hey, Lexa.” Anya said nervously.

“Hey, Anya.” She answered with no emotion, still frowning.

“Hey, Lexa.” Raven swallowed after.

“Hey, Raven.” Lexa answered again, emotionless.

“How are you?” Anya asked, not moving at all.

“Okay fucking stop already. I’m already freaked out we all just called each other by our first name. What is going on between you two?”

Anya sighed and locked eyes with Raven, who softly smiled back. Anya’s face lit up and Lexa noticed they held hands under the table.

“Oh, you have got to be kidding me.” Lexa noticed their heart eyes now. “You two? Since when?”

“We wanted to tell you, okay. We just didn’t know how.” Raven said.

“Why? You thought I wasn’t gonna approve this?”

Anya and Raven locked eyes again.

“Maybe?” Anya admitted.

Lexa could finally laugh about it and stood up to go hug them.

“I’m so pissed at you for not telling me but I’m so happy for you guys. I had no idea.” Lexa hugged them and then let them go.

Harper happily went to hug them as well. This girl was full of energy.

“How did this happen? How did I not know about this?” Lexa asked. Meanwhile, she was dying to tell them about Clarke as well. But not right now. Maybe another time.

“You were busy. We don’t see each other much more after school, Woods.” Raven said and Lexa sadly knew she was right. She had been spending a lot of time practicing her music, practicing for baseball, studying and last but not least, thinking about Clarke.

They told Lexa every piece and bit about it happened, sometimes even a little too much when Lexa stopped them before she would be cringing again. The way they talked about each other, they looked at each other made Lexa miss Clarke even more. Her heart was filled with jealousy today. Happiness for their friends, but jealousy for having such a public relationship where they could simply hold hands in public places.

She hated Clarke wasn’t here right now. But that didn’t stop her from texting how she felt. She was surrounded by couples and she just wanted Clarke to be here.

 

**Lexa 12:42 p.m.  
** _I miss you_

Lexa put her phone down and waited patiently for a reply. It was a simple text, but it was just how Lexa felt.

“Let me make it up to you. Let’s hang out at my house this Saturday. Mini party because it’s just going to be just the five of us.” Lexa already regretted saying it because she would be the only one not sucking face. Oh well.

“Party at Woods’!” Raven celebrated and they all sounded exciting.

Her mom was working the night shift anyway so they were alone.

They all finished eating and Lexa saw one last time how Raven and Anya, Monty and Harper kissed each other goodbye. And just like Clarke felt that Lexa needed her, she texted her back.

 

**Clarke 13:04 p.m.  
** _I miss you too, but I’ve got another important matter going on. Pizza or pasta?_

And just by that, Lexa smiled her way to class.

 

\----

**Lexa 11:03 p.m.  
** _Goodmorning :)  How’s it going over there? Do you know what time you’ll be home yet?_

**Clarke 12:38 p.m.  
** _I’m already home._

 

Lexa’s look got serious.

 

**Lexa 12:39 p.m.  
** _What do you mean? Already? You want me to call you?_

She wasn’t sure how she was going to call in the middle of her class, but she would figure something out.

 

**Clarke 12:40 p.m.  
** _You worry about your own things, about being in High School. I’ll worry about mine._

Rude? Something definitely was wrong.

 

**Lexa 12:41 p.m.  
** _Okay… I’m just trying to help, Clarke…_

**Clarke 12:43 p.m.  
** _Stop helping me. We’re not together. I’m not your problem._

 

Lexa had the biggest frown on her face. And the biggest empty feeling in her chest. She was feeling weird. Was it something she had done? She would kill herself if this was her fault.

 

**Lexa 12:44 p.m.  
** _I know we’re not really together… Still, you know you can talk to me_

She knew Clarke and her weren’t really together. Maybe that’s why Clarke didn’t want to bother her with her problems. But Lexa didn’t care. Just because they weren’t together together didn’t mean she didn’t care about the blonde. She asked to go to the bathroom and dialed Clarke’s number a few times but nothing.

 

**Lexa 12:49 p.m.  
** _Please pick up your phone. I’m worried about you_

 

Lexa tried calling again but it was useless.

**Lexa 12:51 p.m.  
** _Why are you pushing me away? Pick up your phone!!_

Lexa felt a tiny lump in the back of her throat which she tried swallowing away.

Here she was. An eighteen year old girl at school in the bathroom, begging her not official girlfriend to pick up the damn phone.

**Lexa 12:56 p.m.  
** _You owe me an explanation right now. I mean it, Clarke_

Finally Clarke picked up her phone and Lexa immediately knew she had been crying.

“What the fuck, Clarke.” Was all Lexa managed to say anyway and Clarke let out a sob.

“Clarke?”

“I’m so sorry.” She breathed out.

Lexa couldn’t feel anything else then to melt by her voice, feeling sorry for her anyway. Lexa calmed down a little.

“What happened?” Lexa asked softly.

“I lost everything.”

“What do you mean?”

Clarke sniffed. “They took everything away from me. My apartment, my money, my stuff, my music. They robbed me.”

Lexa’s jaw dropped slightly.

“What? Who did?”

Clarke let out a sob. “Record label. Those people. It wasn’t real. They weren’t real. I don’t know where to go, Lexa. I’m so embarrassed.”

Although Clarke was being an asshole just earlier, Lexa thought she had every right to be. Well, sort of.

“Those motherfuckers.” Was all Lexa could say.

“I’ve been wandering around all day here and I look like a junkie. I’m sorry I didn’t want to bother you with this, I really didn’t.” Another sob and all Lexa wanted to do was hold the older woman tightly. How could she not?

“Is that why you pushed me away?”

Clarke hummed and sniffed.

“I’m so sorry-”

“You have got to stop doing that.” She said desperately. “I don’t care if you and I aren’t official. I still care about you. I’m still here for you.”

Clarke let out a sigh that sounded relieved. “I feel so lonely, Lexa. All I have is Niylah around here. I can’t just go back to her.”

Lexa shook her head but then remembered Clarke couldn’t see her.

“You shouldn’t.” She said convincing.

Lexa didn’t know what to say. What to tell her. She just wished she was there right now.

“How did they even rob you?” Lexa mumbled.

“The papers I signed. I told you about it when you were here. I gave them permission to take everything from me and I didn’t even know. I should’ve read it carefully.”

Lexa sighed. “You should go to the police.”

“I already did. They were looking into it but weren’t sure they could do anything to help me since I signed the papers and they disappeared from LA.”

Clarke sniffed once more until she was a little calmer.

“I’m so sorry, baby.” Lexa said sadly. “I wish I was there with you.”

Clarke let out a sad chuckle. “Me too. I’m sorry I was an asshole to you. I don’t know why I thought you would leave me as well. But you’re more mature than most people in High School. I should’ve known better.”

How could Lexa stay mad at that?

“It’s okay. I just hope you know now that you can talk to me about anything.”

“I do.”

“So what are you going to do? You’re not gonna drink, are you?”

Clarke scoffed. “I wish.”

“Clarke…”

“I don’t know. I don’t have a clue. I could go to my parents. But I’m not that great with my stepdad so I don’t want to go. They live somewhere in Portland as well, you know.”

Lexa listened carefully.

“I have no idea how I’m going to pay for the flight or a place to live. I don’t know what to do.” She sighed out again.

Lexa couldn’t really believe what was happening. She couldn’t believe Clarke had been robbed by these fuckers. Clarke lost everything. She must feel like shit.

“I feel like shit.” Clarke mumbled and Lexa only nodded, getting confirmation.

Would it be crazy to ask Clarke-? No. That would be crazy indeed. But what if?

“Maybe you can stay with us for a while. My mom usually doesn’t mind. Besides, she already met you.”

Lexa swallowed nervously. Had she gone too far? She only hoped her mom would cooperate. And Clarke, too.

“That would be crazy. No, I don’t want this to become your problem.”

“This again? You’re not a problem to me. Besides, do you really think I mind having you over at my house?” Lexa said and Clarke let out a barely audible chuckle.

“No, but, I couldn’t ask that from you. Or your mother.”

“I could call my mom and ask if it’s okay for you to stay for a while. Just until you find yourself a job and a place.” Ignoring Clarke.

Clarke hesitated but then hummed. “Okay. Only if your mom is okay with it. And tell her I’m not staying for a long time. Two weeks top.”

Lexa smiled wide and promised Clarke she would tell her mom. She had to call her mom right now.

 

\----

 

She hadn’t had the chance to call her mom because she was already gone for a long time now. When she came back, class was almost finished and luckily this was her last class so she raced home to find her mom there. This couldn’t be any better. Usually she was at work. But not today. On Wednesdays she would always have the night shift.

“Mom. Hi. How are you?” She rushed out and sat down next to her.

Indra raised an eyebrow.

“Fine? But I’m not sure if you are.”

“Mom listen, I need your help with something and it’s really important.”

She knew she had to lie somehow to her mom to make it sound like a good story. She had been thinking about it on the way home.

She sighed. Here goes nothing.

“Do you remember Miss Griffin?”

“Lovely music teacher? Sure.”

Lexa smiled at the word lovely. This was good.

“Exactly. So, she just moved in here and she bought an apartment but she can’t get in yet because of a misunderstanding. Which means she’s homeless and she needs a place to stay here in Portland for a little while. Maybe a week or two?” Lexa bit her cheeks.

Her mom squinted her eyes, looking and listening at her.

“And because she doesn’t know literally anyone around here and since she has helped me out a lot with my music and never asked anything back, I thought it would be okay if we offered her a place to sleep until she can get into her apartment.” She rambled.

Lexa mentally crossed her fingers and let out a sigh.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Lexa said surprised.

“That’s really nice of you, Lexa.”

Lexa laughed dumbly.

“So it’s okay if she stays for a little while?”

“Of course. Poor woman. Is she already here?”

Lexa hid her smile. “Not yet.”

“Okay well, you know how to treat a guest in case I’m not around. She can sleep in the guest room. I’ve got to go to work soon.”

Lexa nodded too eagerly.

“Are you okay?” Indra frowned.

Lexa was being way too nervous and hyper. Her mom just said yes(!!).

“Yes.”

“Okay… I’ll see you tomorrow.” Indra stood up, staring weirdly at Lexa until she was out the door and the first thing that Lexa did was call Clarke. She immediately picked up.

“Go to the airport now and let’s hope and pray there is a flight to Portland for tonight.” Was the first thing Lexa said, she tried not to squeal.

“Oh my god. Are you serious? Did your mom approve your plan?”

“Yes she did. Lexa Woods at your service, ma’am.”

Clarke snorted and laughed before she let out a quiet sob.

“You’re amazing. I’m going to rush to the airport and see if there’s a flight.”

“Do you need any money?”

“No, no. You’ve done enough. I’ve still got cash, I’ll be fine.”

“And if you’re not, call me.”

“I will.”

About an hour later she received a text indeed from the blonde.

 

**Clarke 16:28 p.m.  
** _Can you pick me up at the airport at 9:23? I think I just booked a flight._


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They explore a little what it's like to live together. With Indra.

Lexa showered, put on some black boyfriend jeans, black shirt and a grey hoodie, sprayed some deodorant on herself, brushed her teeth, hesitated to buy some flowers but she decided she was so excited and wanted to make Clarke happy she bought them anyway, and drove off to the airport.

9:15 p.m. She was on time so that was good. She had no idea how she would have to react when she saw Clarke coming towards her. Did she hug her? I mean, for sure. Did she kiss her? Doubtful. They were in public. Lexa felt so nervous and she just tried her best not to get sweaty and look calm.

9:37 and finally a few people started coming out of the gate and greeted the people who were waiting for them. But no familiar blonde. Maybe she had missed her flight? Maybe she decided not to come to Portland after all. Lexa’s own thoughts made her even more nervous.

Lexa impatiently looked around her waited a few more minutes.

And then she finally saw _her_. She saw the beautiful blonde mess walking out of the gate. A simple black tank top (which was way too cold right now), some jeans and her sneakers, her hair up in a messy bun, hardly any make up and red, sad eyes as well from crying.

Guess what? Still absolutely gorgeous.

The moment they met eyes, Clarke started tearing up. Lexa walked fast towards her to meet her in the middle and all she wanted to do was embrace the older woman and hold her tight as ever. She put her arms around her and Clarke rested her head on her shoulder and her arms around Lexa’s waist, holding her close. She heard Clarke silently sob against her and Lexa’s heart broke for her. Lexa’s hoodie on her shoulder was already wet from her tears, but Lexa didn’t care.

They stood there for a long time in each other’s arms and Lexa was now gently shushing Clarke and comforting her by putting her hand against the back of her head, soothingly running her fingers through her hair.

“It’s okay, baby. I’ve got you.” Lexa whispered and placed a gentle kiss on her temple. They were alone now anyway. She felt Clarke slightly nod against her. Or maybe it was another sob. She couldn’t tell.

Clarke’s sobs finally faded after a while and Clarke then took a step back, still holding Lexa’s waist. Lexa helped Clarke wipe away her tears on her cheeks and after she was done, Lexa put the flowers in front of her, hoping it could make her smile a little.

And it did. Clarke smiled just a little bit through her sad eyes and took the flowers from her. Seeing Clarke smile made Lexa already feel better.

“Thank you. That’s really sweet. But you didn’t have to.” Was all Clarke could say with a slight grin but Lexa knew she did have to. How else was she going to make Clarke smile?

Lexa returned her grin. “You look so beautiful.”

And once again Clarke smiled, a little wider this time. Oh well, maybe the flowers were unnecessary after all.

“I look like a junkie.” Clarke’s voice was huskier than ever. The poor woman had probably almost lost her voice by all the crying.

Lexa shook her head. “No you don’t.”

She placed a kiss on her temple and she felt Clarke relax a little in her arms.

“Let’s go?” Lexa asked after a while and Clarke nodded.

She let Clarke go before offering her hand to Clarke. She didn’t expect it but Clarke eagerly grabbed her hand and intertwined their fingers. Clarke seemed to really _need_ this tiny act of support.

Clarke let out a shiver when they stepped outside. Of course, she was only in her tank top. Duh. Lexa quickly responded and let Clarke go for a second to pull off her hoodie and gave it to Clarke. She looked way too thankful at Lexa and didn’t waste any time to put it on.

“Thanks, babe.” She grinned softly.

Heart fluttering.

Lexa only smiled in return at her and laced their fingers together again. Soon they reached the car and Lexa silently drove home. It was a fifteen minute car drive and soon they were at Lexa’s home.

They both walked inside as Clarke put the flowers down and took a good look around her. Lexa stared at her with her hands in her pockets as Clarke awkwardly shifted around a little. She looked so adorable in Lexa’s oversized hoodie and Lexa smiled. She couldn’t believe Clarke was actually here. Then Clarke locked eyes with Lexa and raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

Clarke slowly walked towards her and put her hands around her waist. Lexa licked her unnoticed dry lips as they just stared into each other’s eyes. Lexa loved how incredibly blue Clarke’s eyes were.

“I can’t thank you enough for helping me out.”

Lexa nodded. “No problem. I’m already glad that you’re here.”

Then Clarke slowly moved closer and gently took Lexa’s lips into her mouth, her hand resting on her chest. Clarke desperately claimed Lexa’s lips over and over again as Lexa let Clarke take control. Clarke opened her mouth and Lexa could taste the salty tears from before on them. That didn’t stop Lexa from kissing her harder and right when she did, she felt Clarke’s lips shake against hers. Not long after that she heard a sob again and Clarke deepened the kiss. It was desperate, shaky but confident all in one and their tongues danced in a new yet familiar way.

Clarke panted against Lexa’s lips and sniffed, needing to come up for air as she did. Lexa looked at Clarke’s swollen dark lips as there were tears rolling down Clarke’s cheeks again.

“You’re okay.” Lexa hugged the blonde tight as Clarke’s damp face rested in Lexa’s neck. “It’s okay.” Lexa placed a kiss on her shoulder and waited until Clarke calmed down again.

“I’m so sorry I’m putting you through this.” She breathed out and Lexa shook her head.

“Stop saying that. I’m here for you.”

Clarke nodded. “I just need a good night’s rest.”

Lexa only grabbed her hand to lead her upstairs.

“My mom told me you could use the guestroom. But she works the night shift right now.” She gave Clarke a daring look.

“I owe your mom big time for letting me stay here. So when she’s around, I’m sleeping in the guestroom.”

“And if she’s not?”

“I’m sleeping with you. Duh.” Clarke already walked into Lexa’s room like she owned the place.

Lexa’s smile widened and handed Clarke some pajamas as they both got into their own sleeping clothes. Clarke laid down way faster in bed than Lexa and Lexa got in bed behind Clarke, her arm around her waist and bodies against one another.

Lexa placed a kiss against Clarke’s back of the neck and Clarke then laced their fingers together and brought their hands up to her chest, right under her chin.

This was exactly what Clarke needed right now. They didn’t even feel like doing anything else than just holding each other. Clarke needed this.

“I’ve got to go to school tomorrow morning, but I’ll be home early. I don’t have many classes.”

“Okay.”

“Just grab anything you want. My stuff is yours, too.”

“Okay, thanks babe.”

Just hearing that and having Clarke in her arms, Lexa fell asleep with a smile on her face.

 

\----

 

The next morning Lexa left as silent as possible as she didn’t want to wake up Clarke. She looked so peaceful when she was asleep. She wanted to let the blonde sleep for as long as she needed.

She went to school, had two classes and finally, baseball practice. As usual she changed and showered at home. It was still morning and she just hoped Clarke was already awake.

When she got home and checked for Clarke, she wasn’t awake. She was adorably slightly snoring and tangled up in Lexa’s bedsheets. Her mom wasn’t home either and Lexa decided to let the blonde sleep for another while.

Lexa decided to make some food first before showering for both Clarke and her. She was hungry like a bear. She grabbed a few eggs, bacon and some bread and made a nice fresh salad. Just when Lexa was almost done and cutting the cucumber, she felt two arms around her and a head against her back.

Lexa jumped and gasped, almost cutting her finger with the knife (not really) before she heard a familiar laugh.

It was Clarke’s.

“Sorry, baby.” She heard her say and received a kiss on her back. Lexa turned around in Clarke’s arms. She was wearing her tank top, a bra (unfortunately) and some reasonable shorts that were Lexa’s in case her mom would be home probably.

“I almost lost a finger.” She said dramatically, obviously joking and kissed Clarke thoroughly before Clarke broke the kiss to speak.

“Good morning, smelly.” Clarke said.

Lexa let out a chuckle. “I know, I know, I just had practice.”

“I see that.” Clarke slowly guided her hands down so Lexa’s back, so they were almost on her butt. “You look really hot in those pants.” She whispered close to her ear.

Lexa bit her lip and when she went in for another kiss, Clarke backed off, leaving Lexa without her touch.

“But you need to go shower first.” Clarke teased.

Lexa let out a sigh and walked towards Clarke who stepped back again.

“I want a hug first.”

“No. I already gave you one.”

Lexa took another step forward and Clarke another backwards.

“Just one.”

“Lexa, I mean it.” Clarke laughed, not really meaning it.

“Come on, I’m making breakfast for you. I think I deserve one.” Lexa pouted and when Clarke started running away like a little child, Lexa followed her around the kitchen, both laughing like stupid little kids.

Lexa seemed to be still warm from practice and gently attacked Clarke, pushing her to the wall and putting her arms around her waist. Clarke let out sounds that were a mix of protest and laughter as she let the brunette hug her tightly.

Lexa smiled and kissed Clarke’s neck which made it even harder for Clarke to escape.

“Why do you always do this when you’re smelly?” Clarke let out laughing as she tried pushing Lexa away, but she couldn’t. Lexa had a death grip on her.

“Hmm. Can I stay here forever?”

“No!” Clarke blurted out laughing and finally managed to push her away.

Lexa pouted. “Not even after I shower?”

Clarke smiled and stared at her before finally answering. “You’re cute. You know that?”

They both exchanged smiles and when they heard the door unlock they both jumped and froze.

“Hello, Miss Griffin! Welcome.”

Lexa slowly walked away to the kitchen table, far away from Clarke. The blonde literally went from Clarke, to Miss Griffin. Just an act she seemed to play way too easy.

“Indra, hello.” Clarke gave her two kisses on the cheeks so that it wasn’t too formal. “Thank you so much for letting me stay for a while. I really appreciate it.”

Indra nodded. “Of course. Lexa told me what happened. When exactly can you move in to your apartment?”

Clarke hesitated a moment, not knowing what to say before locking eyes with Lexa who’s eyes were wide. _Shit._ Clarke didn’t know what she told her mom. But Clarke was a natural. She played along.

“They didn’t really tell me. They would call me within two weeks.” Clarke smiled a little nervously.

Lexa tried hiding hers.

“Well don’t worry, you can stay as long as you need.” Indra said as she walked back to hang up her coat.

Clarke quickly exchanged panicking looks with Lexa before Indra talked.

“Who’s flowers are these?”

 _Crap._ She’d forgotten about those. Lexa wanted to speak but before she could, Clarke spoke for her.

“Uh, mine. I mean, those are for you. From me. Just a little thank you from me, to you.” Another nervous laugh and Lexa knew this was her own fault. Too bad Clarke was almost forced to come up with this answer.

“Oh, thank you but you didn’t have to do that.” Indra said thankfully and Clarke smiled.

“No problem.”

Lexa noticed Clarke had a hard time saying that by the way she nervously reached for her neck.

“Did Lexa treat you as a guest?” Indra said, looking at Clarke.

“Yeah, absolutely. She’s great.” Clarke smiled.

Indra smiled one last time before turning to Lexa.

“Good. And _you_ should go shower. This is no outfit to present yourself to your teacher. What must she think about you?”

Both of them tried holding themselves together. They both knew what ‘her teacher’ thought about her outfit.

“You really look like you need a shower.” Clarke teased.

“I was just about to do that.” Lexa smiled and walked upstairs. Lexa smiled out of disbelief. If this was the way they would react around each other when her mom was around, she wasn’t sure she could hold back her laugh every time.

Oh well. At least Clarke was finally here.

 

 

\----

 

 

“This is delicious.” Indra said as she took another bite of Clarke’s homemade lasagna. Clarke insisted on cooking today. It was the least she could do.

“Thank you.” Clarke said proudly.

“This really does taste good.” Lexa confirmed as she hungrily took more lasagna on her fork which made Clarke laugh a little.

“You have to give me the recipe later.” Indra said and Clarke only nodded.

“Sure. It’s not that hard to make.”

“I barely have time anymore to cook.” Indra protested and Clarke nodded understandably.

“I get that.”

“Luckily Lexa cooks sometimes. Who is now extremely quiet.” Indra raised an eyebrow.

“You can cook?” Clarke suddenly imagined Lexa in the kitchen, with her baseball pants and her sports bra. A cloth over her muscly shoulders, cooking Clarke’s favorite dish, all in slow motion as Clarke imagined herself being all over Lexa, touching her arms, her abs.

Clarke licked her lips unconsciously when Indra’s voice snapped her out of her beautiful daydream..

“Are you texting your girlfriend again?”

This had Clarke’s attention and her brows knitted together. Lexa looked at her, shaking her head.

“No, mom. I don’t have a girlfriend.”

Clarke sounded relieved though disappointed. But she tried not to think about that.

“When are you going to stop lying to your mother?” Indra said and then she turned to Clarke. “Lexa likes this girl at your music class but she won’t tell me who it is. You must know her.” Indra teased her on purpose and Lexa immediately put on her defense.

“Oh my god, I do not. I really don’t.”

“You told me yourself.” She turned to Clarke again. “She was devastated one day and admitted it was about this girl and the other day she must’ve fixed it because she was all happy again.”

“Mom, stop. Jesus.” Lexa tried but it was no use.

“And I’m positive Lexa’s got a girlfriend now but she just won’t bring her home. What does a mother have to do so that her daughter brings her girl home.”

Clarke was just very amused. Did Lexa talk to her mom about them? Or did Lexa talk about another girl at music class? What was happening?

“Eh, I do not know who she is. Sorry.” Clarke said to Indra and locked eyes with Lexa who let out an annoyed sigh.

“I can see you really like her. Maybe even love her.”

“Okay, now you’re going too far. I don’t _love_ her. She’s just… She’s nice. I like her company.”

Silence.

What _was_ happening? Clarke laughed from the inside because she didn’t know how to react. She saw Lexa was nervously eating her lasagna and that made Clarke chuckle. She loved teasing Lexa.

“Yeah. I really do like her.” Lexa repeated which got Clarke’s attention again. Lexa softly smiled at her, letting her know she was talking about the blonde.

Suddenly she felt relieve. She didn’t know why. Or maybe she did.

“Why devastated?” Clarke asked.

Lexa cleared her throat.

“Uhm- Because at a point I kissed her. And then I ruined it. Because she thought I had other intentions with her so we didn’t talk for a week. I felt terrible, but my intentions were never wrong. I never meant to hurt her.”

Clarke melted like a puddle by those words and didn’t know what to say. For the first time tonight, she was left speechless, but she forced herself to say something in her defense.

“Maybe she was scared about what your intentions were. Maybe she knew about your history with other girls. Maybe she just thought you weren’t any different from the rest.”

Lexa softly smiled and nodded.

“I know. But I want her to know that I’ve changed. I’m not here to hurt her.”

Right before Clarke could say anything back, Indra spoke.

“See? You care about her. Just describe her. I want to know what she looks like.”

“No.” Lexa shook her head eagerly.

“Yeah, tell me. I just want to know who it is.” Clarke was in the mood of teasing again and she saw Lexa getting nervous.

Lexa cleared her throat, putting her knife and fork down.

“She is- Uhm. Pretty.” Lexa began and Clarke let out a silent chuckle.

“Funny. Smart.”

Her mom rolled her eyes. “What does she _look_ like?”

Lexa sighed defeated.

“She’s just so beautiful. It doesn’t matter what she’s wearing, everything suits her. She has blonde hair. Blu- Beautiful eyes.” Lexa corrected herself before she would be really describing Clarke.

“And she’s so caring. And creative. I love hearing her play the guitar. It’s her instrument, you know? It just really puts me at ease. And we have a really good connection.”

Then Lexa took a deep breath while Clarke was just melting away like a big puddle of feelings. Again.

She was going to reward Lexa so good tonight. If she would get the chance with her mom around.

“But she’s not my girlfriend.” Lexa added.

“She sounds lovely.” Indra said. “Do you know who it is?”

Clarke just stared at Lexa, a bit confused about the last part. She didn’t want Clarke to be her girlfriend, otherwise she wouldn’t have added the last part. Right?

Besides, they had both agreed on this.

“Miss Griffin?” Indra said impatiently.

“O erm. Could be anyone. Big class.” She said awkwardly, locking eyes with Lexa.

Indra sighed. “Well, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”

 

\----

 

After that embarrassing but delighted dinner, they all watched some tv, keeping a respectful distance between them in case Indra would notice anything. Lexa felt a little sad but she knew this would happen. There was nothing she could do about it.

Later they all went to bed and Clarke and Lexa only said goodnight to each other as Lexa saw Clarke disappear into the guestroom and her mom to her own room. Lexa laid down in bed, staring at the ceiling as she let out a deep sigh. She already missed Clarke in her arms.

She stayed like that for half an hour and decided to text Clarke.

 

**Lexa 11:48 p.m.  
** _Are you awake?_

 

**Clarke 11:49 p.m.  
** _No._

Lexa chuckled.

 

**Lexa 11:49 p.m.  
** _I’m coming over. Don’t jump when I come in_

**Clarke 11:50 p.m.  
** _I want to protest this and tell you this is a bad idea, but who am I kidding?_

Lexa smiled and got up silently to walk to the guest room. She tried not to make a single sound, even when she opened and closed Clarke’s bedroom door behind her.

“Hey.” Lexa whispered into the darkness.

“Hey, come here.” Clarke whispered and Lexa got into bed behind Clarke.

She got used to the darkness and could finally see Clarke’s face a bit. She pulled her closer and placed a tiny kiss on her nose.

“I couldn’t sleep.” Lexa admitted.

“Me neither. I hate sleeping alone.”

Lexa raised both eyebrows. “Really? I didn’t know  that.”

Clarke nodded and let out a sigh. Her breath felt warm against Lexa’s lips.

Suddenly Clarke reached for Lexa’s pants, getting inside of them and Lexa gasped out of shock.

“What are you doing?”

“Shh. Be quiet.” Clarke whispered.

“Clarke, this is a bad i- _oh fuck-._ ”

Clarke chuckled as she was stroking her dick now. Lexa gasped at the hard feeling between her legs.

“What’s that- _oh-_ for?” Lexa moaned and Clarke shushed her again.

“I just want to test how quiet you can be. Your mom’s asleep, right?”

Lexa only hummed, biting her lip to choke back her moans.

Clarke started pumping harder and faster and it felt so good, Lexa couldn’t help but buck her hips into the blonde’s hand.

“Keep still.” Clarke demanded and Lexa swore she just came a little.

Lexa bit back every single moan (barely) as Clarke had already placed her hand on her mouth to keep her from moaning loudly.

Suddenly Clarke pulled off Lexa’s pants and boxers and lined her mouth up to her dick. She replaced her hand with her mouth and waste any time to put her mouth around it. Lexa cried out a little when she felt Clarke’s warm, wet mouth around her length. She tried her very best not to start thrusting now and let the blonde to her thing.

Point was, Lexa was embarrassedly close already.

Clarke started working harder and faster and suddenly covered Lexa mouth again with her hand. She gently cupped Lexa’s balls with her other free hand and licked her way up before sinking her mouth into her dick again. Lexa cared a lot but on the other hand didn’t care enough right now if her mom would hear something. She didn’t want this to stop.

“I’m close.” Lexa breathed through Clarke’s hand and Clarke smiled at the desperate attempt of speaking.

A few more pumps from Clarke was all it took before Lexa cried out (kind of softly) and shot her cum into Clarke’s mouth, trying not to leave any mess. Lexa was still catching her breath when Clarke cleaned herself and moved by her side to kiss her. She could taste herself on Clarke’s mouth and she figured she didn’t care. It were Clarke’s lips so she didn’t care.

Clarke chuckled and nuzzled into her neck, cuddling her.

“That was unexpected.” Lexa whispered.

“For you maybe.”

“Oh so you had this plan all along?”

Clarke nodded into her neck and then kissed her cheek.

“Right after you told me about your crush in my class.”

Lexa smiled almost- proudly?

“Actually, I was totally talking about Monty.”

Clarke laughed silently and gently hit her arm before wrapping her hand around her biceps. Then she spoke.

“He does have pretty blond hair.”


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I'm late with the update. I was struggling to find some time for writing this time.  
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this smut and fluff!

**Clarke 13:18 p.m.  
** _I just had the most embarrassing conversation with your mom about your ‘girlfriend’ and how much she hoped you were being safe with her. She almost bought you condoms._

 

 **Lexa 13:22 p.m.  
** _Oh god. I don’t wanna hear this._

**Clarke 13:25 p.m.  
** _I just can’t help but feel guilty for not telling her something…_

**Lexa 13:28 p.m.  
** _I don’t. You see how annoying she gets about it?_

**Clarke 13:28 p.m.  
** _‘Hi Indra it’s me, Miss Griffin, I’m the one fucking your daughter.’_

**Lexa 13:30 p.m.  
** _I’m cringing. But slightly turned on._

**Clarke 13:33 p.m.  
** _Weirdo. Pay attention to your class._

**Lexa 13:37 p.m.  
** _You texted me. I can’t pay attention knowing you and my mom are discussing my sex life._

  
**Clarke 13:38 p.m.**  
_I mean… there’s not much to tell…_

  
**Lexa 13:39 p.m.**  
_The way you scream out in pleasure tells me otherwise :)_

**Clarke 13:39 p.m.  
** _Just pay attention to your class._

 ****  
  
Lexa 13:42 p.m.  
_Yes ma’am_  
  


**_Clarke 13:44  
_ ** _Good. I’ll be out buying some stuff like clothes in a minute. Visited my mom today and asked her for some money. Couldn’t be any more embarrassed about it…_

 

 **Lexa 14:02 p.m.  
** _Don’t be, you did good. I’ll be home for dinner later. See you then_

**Clarke 14:35 p.m.  
** _See you then, babes._

\----

 

Lexa couldn’t wait to finally get home. It had been a long day. She’d been spending time with her friends, who were together. Which made Lexa miss Clarke even more. It was only Wednesday but Lexa had already been thinking about this Saturday. The hang out with her friends. She had no idea how to deal with Clarke. Sure, she wanted her to be there, but Monty didn’t know her as Clarke. He knew her as Miss Griffin. But Raven and Anya? They knew her as Clarke, absolutely not as Miss Griffin.

She let out another desperate sigh only thinking about it. She would just have to talk to Clarke about it. She wasn’t going to make any decision that included Clarke without her.

Finally the very last bell rang and she practically ran to her car. Last night was the last time she saw Clarke awake. She couldn’t help but miss her knowing she was finally here but couldn’t stay at home with her. Her mom would not appreciate it.

After the ten minute drive she finally got home and entered the house, looking for the blonde.

“Clarke? Are you home?”

Nothing.

“Clarke?”

“Clarke?” A voice behind her echoed and Lexa jumped and held on to her chest.

“Jesus, mom. Don’t scare me like that.” She noticed her cheeks burn a little red. She wasn’t sure if she was more afraid of her mom sneaking up on her or her mom’s response.

“I’m always home until dinner at Wednesdays. You should know that by now.” Lexa was glad she started talking about something else.

“Yeah. You just snuck up on me.”

Indra squinted her eyes and they both remained silent for a while.

“She’s out shopping by the way. So you call her Clarke now?”

Lexa swallowed thickly. How could she have been so stupid. She knew her mom was always here on Wednesdays.

 “Uh yeah. She said it was okay to call her that at home. As soon as class starts, I’ll have to call her Miss Griffin, you know. Just a friendly gesture of hers.” Another thick swallow.

“She really is friendly, isn’t she? I had a nice talk with her today.” Indra said almost proudly.

Lexa let out a nervous laugh. “You did?”

She knew they did. Lexa didn’t know what exactly was so ‘nice’ about talking about your daughter’s sex life, but whatever.

“Yes. She seems really smart and responsible.”

Lexa nodded. “She is.”

Indra gave her a grin and stood up to make start making dinner. Lexa helped her cooking until she patiently waited for Clarke to come back.

“Hello, everyone.” Lexa suddenly heard the husk, familiar voice behind her. She hadn’t even noticed the sound of the door opening.

“Hi, did you buy something?” Indra immediately turned around and left Lexa with the frying food.

“I didn’t buy much, but yes.” Clarke said.

Lexa also turned around now, looking at the beautiful woman in front of her. She was wearing a white blouse that matched her pretty pale skin, some jeans and sneakers, her hair was down in waves today.

“Hi, Lexa.” Clarke said totally normal.

“Hey.”

Lexa wanted to do something. Walk up to her and hug her. Kiss her. But she just frustrated leaned against the kitchen furniture, her arms crossed.

“What did you buy?” Indra asked and Lexa put the food on the table.

“I can show you.” Clarke said excited and Indra nodded exciting back. Why were they so happy about seeing clothes?

Indra smiled and gave each piece of clothing Clarke showed her approval and compliments. Clarke was glowing again. Lexa was happy to see that, although she still didn’t quite understand what was so great about clothes. Obviously Clarke didn’t really have any clothes because they took her stuff.

“What’s in this bag?” Indra pointed at the last shopping bag.

“Uh, this is- It’s not-” Clarke nervously started. “-Well- It’s not clothing. Well, not really. I mean, it’s- it’s lingerie.”

Lexa’s eyes widened as Clarke subtly locked eyes with her. _Dammit._ Lexa could see that Clarke did not mean to say that.

“Oh, I didn’t realize you were seeing someone.” Indra said surprised.

Clarke laughed nervously. “I kind of am.”

“Oh, nothing serious?”

Clarke laughed nervously. Very nervously. Finally, Lexa could kind of enjoy awkward Clarke.

“We just started dating, so.”

“Ah, it’s all fresh and new and exciting. I get that.” Indra said and Clarke only nodded slightly. “Just don’t give yourself away too easily. Men can be cruel sometimes.”

Clarke swallowed nervously.

“Women, too sometimes. But most of them aren’t.”

Lexa could hear Clarke was getting more and more nervous and it made her chuckle.

“Oh, I didn’t realize- I’m sorry I shouldn’t assume. Lexa is- I shouldn’t assume-”

“It’s fine. You couldn’t know.” Clarke said, still full of nerves. Lexa wondered if she had given away too much already. She just hoped her mom wouldn’t suspect anything.

“Let’s eat?” Lexa quickly proposed and Clarke didn’t know how fast to sit next to Lexa. They gave each other a subtle, quick smile before looking both at Indra.

“You’re working the night shift again?” Clarke asked Indra as she took a bite of her food.

“Yes. And you two have music class later?”

They both quickly locked eyes again.

“Yeah, we’re pretty excited.” Lexa said.

 

\----

 

“You should go to music class. I mean it. I don’t want you not to go because of me.” Clarke said as she threw herself on the couch next to Lexa, immediately melting into her body.

Lexa put her arm protectively around her.

“I hate music class. I’m not going.”

“No you don’t. You enjoyed playing the drums so much a few weeks ago.”

“Yeah, because I got the chance to see _you_ in class.”

Clarke looked up at her and smiled.

“Really? I was your reason to come?”

“Come in what context?” Lexa smugly smiled and Clarke rolled her eyes, gently hitting Lexa’s arm.

“Seriously. You shouldn’t lie about that to your mom. The lies are only getting bigger and worse. I really have to bite my tongue sometimes in case I’m afraid that I’ll blurt something out.”

“I know. I feel bad about it, too.”

Clarke sighed. “I just don’t want you doing it. Your mom trusts you.”

Suddenly Lexa felt guilty. She knew Clarke was right. She didn’t deserve that.

“I know. But I’m still not going. There’s nothing you can do to make me go.”

Clarke sighed desperately. They just watched a movie in silence as Clarke snuggled up more and more into Lexa, her legs on Lexa’s lap as Lexa softly caressed them.

“Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something.” Lexa started.

There had to be a point where she had to discuss with Clarke about Saturday.

“Okay?” Clarke mumbled.

“I invited a few friends over this Saturday. Before I knew you were going to stay here. And those friends include Monty and his girlfriend, Raven and Anya. Oh, who apparently are dating now, too.”

Clarke remained silent and Lexa waited a little before continuing.

“It’s just the five of us. And I was wondering if maybe you’d like to join us. But I understand if you don’t. With Monty and all.” She chuckled nervously.

Clarke looked up at her.

“Did you tell them about us?”

“No.”

“Okay.”

“Would you like to join us?”

Clarke sighed.

“I would. It’s just a bad idea to be seen in public together.”

Lexa felt disappointed. “Okay, so, you’re going to stay upstairs the whole time?”

“I guess.”

Lexa got disappointed and thought about the situation.

“I could just introduce you as my friend.”

“Lexa, no-”

“I’d just rather have you with me.”

Clarke sighed. “Me too but it’s a bad idea.”

“It’s a great idea.”

Another sigh.

“I don’t know, Lexa.”

“It’ll be alright. I’ll talk to Monty about it.”

Clarke squinted her eyes for a bit. She groaned out of frustration.

“You know what? Why not.”

Lexa smiled wide. “Really?”

Clarke chuckled and rolled her eyes.

“Shh before I change my mind.”

“Alright, party girl.”

Clarke silently laughed and placed a kiss on Lexa’s jaw as they silently watched the movie again. Lexa was relieved Clarke was going to be there on Saturday. Although she wouldn’t be able to do what she wanted, she would still have Clarke with her.

“You know, now that we’re home alone, maybe you could show me what was in the last shopping bag?” Lexa smugly smiled.

 

\----

 

Lexa’s eyes slowly fluttered open. She hadn’t even heard her alarm go off this morning. Probably because it still wasn’t time yet. Eyes opened, she found herself looking at Clarke who was still asleep. They definitely had some fun last night and seeing Clarke naked again this morning, made Lexa feel worked up again. She couldn’t get over how hot Clarke looked.

Lexa giggled when she found herself having the greatest idea (in her mind). Lexa sat up and started kissing Clarke’s body, starting with her neck, sucking soft wet kisses there. Clarke suddenly let out a sleepy groan and Lexa worked with her mouth between her cleavage as Clarke let her, trailing down kisses to her breasts, belly and thighs. Clarke groaned again and arched her back when Lexa kissed in between her thighs.

She started sucking her clit and when Clarke gasped and arched her back even more, Lexa knew she didn’t mind waking up like this.

Lexa spread her legs for more access, grabbing her ankles to keep her in place. Clarke sat up straight when Lexa silently pushed a finger inside, not even having time to tease because she was already so worked up yet. She felt herself growing hard each second. Clarke then pulled her into a messy kiss and reached out for her dick as she started stroking it gently.

“This is a nice way to wake up.” Clarke mumbled against her lips.

Lexa hummed and kissed her harder this time as Clarke cupped both cheeks, letting go of her full length. Lexa groaned in protest and Clarke chuckled in response. Lexa then harshly let her second finger join inside Clarke, receiving an unexpectedly loud moan from the blonde. Lexa’s dick twitched in jealousy as her fingers were doing all the work.

“Lexa.” Clarke moaned and Lexa couldn’t hold back anymore.

She roughly pulled her fingers out of Clarke and with one movement she turned Clarke around on all fours. She immediately slid into Clarke and bottomed out into her. Clarke didn’t even have time to think about what was happening but let out a loud, satisfying moan when Lexa stilled after bottoming out, letting Clarke get used to her size.

Clarke deliciously squeezed around her and Lexa held on to her hips to keep her steady. When Lexa felt Clarke had adjusted to her size, she roughly pulled out to slam all the way back in, receiving another hot, loud moan from the blonde.

Lexa was already so worked up and she started slamming her hips like it was the very last time she was able to be inside of Clarke. She had to make Clarke feel good. She always wanted to do that.

Lexa started grunting with each thrust as Clarke slammed her hips back when Lexa pushed in every time. Lexa’s heart was pounding out of her chest as she roughly moved her dick in and out of Clarke. She was so focused on getting Clarke off first that when Clarke suddenly moved away, Lexa just stood there, watching as Clarke pushed her on the bed and climbed on top of her. Lexa missed being inside of Clarke but she loved when Clarke took control so she let her. She kissed Lexa hard, their tongues collapsing together when Clarke whispered something against her lips.

“I want to ride you.”

Lexa whimpered and just nodded eagerly.

Clarke got up and hovered her entrance above the tip of Lexa’s dick. She settled herself for a mere second when she slid down on her dick in one smooth movement as they both let out twinning moans of pleasure. Lexa grabbed Clarke’s hips as Clarke rode her hard. Lexa started moving up when meeting Clarke in the middle, the slapping sound of their skins filling the room.

Lexa watched wide-eyed at Clarke’s breasts, deliciously bouncing up and down as she moved. She grabbed and squeezed Clarke’s nipples and Lexa sat up straight to reach Clarke better. She sucked kisses into her neck before pulling a nipple into her mouth. Clarke’s moans were getting louder and heavier every second. Lexa knew she was close by the way she felt their wetness dripping out of Clarke on her dick and leg. She didn’t give two fucks about that right now. She had an amazingly hot woman riding her dick, and she wasn’t planning on stopping her.

That’s when Clarke actually stopped and gasped.

“Did you hear that?” Clarke said out of breath, not daring to move.

“What?” Lexa breathed against her left breast.

“ _Lexa? Are you up yet? Lexa?_ ”

“Shit. My mom’s back.” Lexa cursed, eyes widened.

“Fuck, get out of me.” Clarke whispered.

“You get off of me.” Lexa hissed.

“What the- Lexa, seriously.”

“ _Alexandria? You’re gonna be late for school._ ”

Clarke pursed her lips together at the way her mom called her.

“Don’t even start. Just get off me.” Lexa whispered panicking.

“Seriously, I can’t. I’m stuck.”

Lexa’s heart starting racing.

“Fuck. Fuck, Clarke.”

“I was so close.” Clarke whined.

“Clarke, this isn’t funny. I’m stressing the fuck out here.” Lexa said desperately.

“Okay, okay. On three, we both pull.”

Lexa nodded and stressed out even more when she heard her mom call for her again.

“I’m awake. I’m up.” Lexa yelled back and when she heard her mom coming up the stairs, she nearly passed out.

“Clarke now! Three!” Lexa panicked.

They both helped each other as they both felt like jelly, without any energy left in their legs. With one movement they managed to pull out and they both rushed to put on some clothes, pajamas, anything they could find.

“ _Lexa?_ ” Indra said again, knocking on Lexa’s bedroom door.

“Hide there.” Lexa whispered to Clarke as she walked up to open her door.

“In the closet?” Clarke whispered violently.

“I would never ask you to do that. Just go stand behind it.” She hissed and Clarke did so.

She opened the door as normal as possible and stood behind it, hoping to be able to hide her erection.

“What’s up?” Lexa said calmly.

“Who were you talking to?”

“What? Nobody.” Lexa said nervously.

“If you’re having a girl over I swear to god-”

“I don’t. I promise.” Lexa hoped she said as convincing as possible.

Indra squinted her eyes. “You’re not dressed.” She said as she took a look at her.

“Not yet.” Lexa cleared her throat.

“You have five minutes to get dressed and get the hell out. If I see someone getting out of your room after that, you’re in so much trouble.”

Lexa swallowed thickly and she could think about was hiding her bulge in her pants in less than five minutes and Clarke having to sneak out without her mom seeing her.

Lexa nodded and closed the door, walking straight up to Clarke.

“Now what?” Clarke whispered.

“I don’t know.” Lexa kept her voice down. “I’m just going to get into my now very painful compression shorts and get dressed. I’ll sneak my mom with me downstairs and you get to your own room.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Clarke nodded and nervously watched Lexa get dressed.

“Does it show?” Lexa asked worriedly, pointing at her crutch.

Clarke watched and then pecked her lips.

“Not really. You’re good to go.”

“Okay.” Lexa said relieved. “Hey, I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

Clarke shook her head. “Don’t worry. I think we both got a little stuck because we jumped and we got scared and then our muscles tensed or something.”

Lexa nodded. “I hope we can laugh about it later. Right now I’m still shocked.”

Clarke laughed and pecked her lips once more.

“Me too. Now go. I’ll text you later.”

 

\----

 

 **Clarke 9:42 a.m.  
** _Your mom didn’t see me. We got lucky._

**Lexa 9:43 a.m.  
** _Thank god. My heart’s still racing_

**Clarke 9:43 a.m.  
** _Mine too. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna finish what you started this morning. Have a nice day at school babe._

**Lexa 9:45 a.m.  
** _Goddammit._

\----

 

Right before lunch, Lexa pulled Monty away in the hallway for a minute to talk to him about Saturday. She was a little nervous to tell him, but she had nothing to worry about. Monty was a good guy.

“So let me get this straight. Miss Griffin is now a friend of yours and you invited her this Saturday. And I have to call her ‘Clarke’ because Raven and Anya don’t know she used to be our music teacher and they—I quote— ‘will kill you if they ever find out and then they’ll kill me, too.’”

“You got it.”

“I got it.” Monty said.

“Thanks Monty. I knew I could count on you.”

“Sure. You helped me with Harper. It’s a little weird though to call her by her first name.”

Lexa shrugged. “You’ll get used to it.” She smiled and walked away to her other friends.

 

\----

 

Saturday evening was finally here. Clarke was nervous to meet Lexa’s friends again, especially Monty. It was all so weird. But she was slightly excited to be with Lexa around people. It always felt so secretive when they were together.

The first time the bell rang, Lexa opened it happily and greeted Anya and Raven. Clarke couldn’t help but stare at her. She was wearing these sexy black boyfriend jeans and a simple sweater that looked baseball-ish and _god_ did her arms look good. Clarke had put on some heels today which she knew Lexa secretively loved and some tight jeans with a blouse. Both girls had their hair down, Lexa’s hair a little curlier than Clarke’s.

The second time the bell rang it was Monty and Harper. At first it seemed a little awkward, but soon Monty and Harper acted like they had been her friends all along.

But when the third time the bell rang, they all panicking looked up, except for Raven.

“What? I thought I could invite some more friends. It’s just Murphy and Jasper. And Ontari.”

“And Ontari?” Lexa raised her voice.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you had Clarke with you.” Raven said and Clarke saw Monty frown.

“I hope you’re kidding, Reyes.” Lexa had said as she opened the door to find no one else than Ontari. Murphy and Jasper behind her.

“Hi, stranger.” She fancily gave Lexa two kisses on each cheek and walked towards the rest.

Wow she looked like a damn model or something. Trying to impress Lexa probably.

Ontari sat down next to Clarke and she smiled politely as Clarke did the same.

Lexa noticed her place was taken next to Clarke and sat down somewhere else on the couch.

“So, what were we talking about?” Ontari took the lead and loved being a princess in the spotlight. Clarke rolled her eyes at it.

“Baseball.” Lexa answered and Ontari chuckled dumbly.

“Of course. It’s always baseball with you. You sure love balls, don’t you?” She said with a wink.

_This bitch._

Lexa almost choked on her drink and awkwardly looked away from the girl.

“Anyone want a drink?” Lexa quickly said as she stood up and stretched a little.

Clarke noticed Ontari look at her and bit her bottom lip and Clarke was so close of hitting her right in the babymaker.

Everyone yelled their drinks except for Clarke because she still had a bit left of her drink.

“I’ll help you. It’s too much for one person.” Ontari stood up within a second and Clarke almost tripped her on purpose, but then she remembered this wasn’t pre-school.

“Uh, you really don’t have to. I can do it.”

“Don’t be silly. I’ll help you.” She pushed Lexa to the kitchen and Clarke screamed from the inside. She didn’t know why she felt this way. She just hated to see Lexa with anybody else. But Lexa wasn’t even hers so how could she get mad at her?

After a while (after too long in Clarke’s opinion) They both finally came out with everyone’s drinks, Ontari giggling like a stupid, little kid. Lexa’s face was just neutral, like nothing had happened.

“What are you drinking- sorry, I didn’t catch your name.” Ontari said to Clarke as she sat down next to her.

“Clarke. And no, I’m good.”

“Clarke? Have we met before?”

Clarke shook her head.

“Believe me, we didn’t.”

They did. Kind of. She texted Clarke from Lexa’s phone once. She must’ve seen her name on the screen.

“Huh. Well, how about we do some dancing. No?” Ontari proposed and already stood up. She started doing these sexy dance moves in front of everyone and Clarke honestly wondered what the hell was wrong with her.

She looked at Lexa who was already looking at Clarke and made a gesture that Ontari was already drunk.

That explained a lot.

Weirdly enough, everyone followed Ontari’s lead and Clarke couldn’t look away from the way Lexa was dancing. It was definitely _hot._ The way she did this tiny salsa move Clarke didn’t know she had it in her was making her panties drop.

That ended when Ontari went to dance next to Clarke, giving her a smug look.

“Having fun?”

“Sure.” Clarke said. “You?”

Ontari scoffed. “Oh yeah.” She said as she hungrily watched Lexa move.

_Honestly, what the fuck._

Clarke laughed.

“You uh- you seeing something you like?”

Ontari locked eyes with Clarke.

“Why else would I be here? I’m staying over tonight.”

She confidently walked up to Lexa and that’s when Clarke decided to do something. She couldn’t stand it anymore. She grabbed Lexa’s hand before Ontari even reached her and pulled her with her to the kitchen.

She didn’t care to look behind her and when they were in the kitchen behind closed doors, Clarke let out a frustrated sigh.

“What the hell, Clarke?”

“We need to talk.” She looked behind Lexa, in case anyone would come in.

“About what?”

“About freaking Ontari. I can’t stand the way she looks at you like she’s going to eat you alive.”

Lexa remained silent.

“And then all the flirting. What is her problem?”

Lexa slowly showed her smile and then put her arms around her waist.

“Miss Griffin, are you jealous?”

“No.” Clarke gently pushed her away from her.

“Wow. I didn’t know you were the jealous type.”

“I’m not.” Clarke rolled her eyes. “She just wants to get in your pants. She basically told me.”

“Well, I’m not taken so she’s basically not doing anything wrong.”

Clarke remained silent, not knowing what to say. She couldn’t argue about this. Unfortunately.

Lexa then rolled her eyes and closed the gap between them, her arms on her hips. She placed a kiss on her forehead.

“Come on. I’m not interested in her. Didn’t you notice I was looking at you all the time instead of her?”

Clarke locked eyes with Lexa and shrugged slightly.

“She’s just making all these sexy moves and drawing everyone’s attention to herself.”

“Not my attention.” Lexa chuckled. “You are so much more beautiful.”

Clarke softly grinned.

“I know you’re not taken. It’s just weird seeing you with someone else.” Clarke crossed her arms as Lexa pulled her in closer.

“Clarke?”

“Hm?”

“Do you maybe- like, talk about this later? About the whole ‘taken’ thing.”

Did this mean Lexa wanted to say that Clarke wasn’t in the position to do this anymore? Maybe not. Maybe Lexa wanted to be her girlfriend. Maybe Clarke should just ask her later.

“Okay.” Clarke softly nodded. “Sorry I acted like this. I feel stupid.”

Lexa pulled her into a hug.

“It´s okay. It’s kind of adorable.”

Clarke gently hit her arm and rolled her eyes. Lexa smiled as she walked up to the kitchen door, holding her hand out and waiting for Clarke to grab it. Clarke intertwined their fingers but had a questionable look on her face. They were about to walk back to everyone like this, holding hands.

“How else am I going to show Ontari I’m not interested?”


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am SO INCREDIBLY sorry that I didn't upload earlier. Truth is, I've been distancing myself from my laptop for a very long time because I've been incredibly busy lately. I'm trying to find time to write but I won't upload every week anymore. Hope you still stick to this story because great things are about to happen! Enjoy!

Clarke stared at Lexa like it was the very first time she was actually disappointed in her. She wasn’t. She was more disappointed in herself than in anyone else.

“I don’t know, Lexa. I’m not ready for the world to know. What even is there to know? That we’re fucking?”

Lexa’s eyes turned into sadness. “I thought it was more than that.”

Clarke let out a deep sigh which made Lexa feel a little empty from the inside. Maybe this wasn’t more than that. “Yes it is.” Clarke then let go off her hand, forcing herself to. Still, Lexa felt soothed by her words. “But I’m not comfortable knowing that your whole school is going to know about us.”

Lexa nodded carefully, Clarke knew she had done some damage with her words.

“I get it.” Lexa shrugged.

“I’m sorry.”

Lexa shrugged again and tried smiling softly.

“Does this change anything between us?”

Clarke shook her head and reached for her hand again, carefully stroking it with her thumb. “Of course not. I just want us to be careful. I feel like your mom is onto us and so are your friends. I just want us to have a good time. Have some fun. No jealousy.”

Lexa nodded and gave her a soft grin. Clarke hated the way this had turned out, but it was her fault after all. Or, really Ontari’s fault. Sort of.

“Okay. ‘Cause I really like you.” Lexa softly smiled.

Clarke smiled back and gave her a long kiss on the lips before, one by one, returning to their drunk, dancing friends.

 

\----

 

Lexa did not once take her eyes away from Clarke. The way she danced was so attractive and the fact that they switched eyes every once in a while, knowing they could get caught, made the situation ten times hotter. Lexa couldn’t wait for everyone to leave so she could have Clarke to herself.

Finally when they all left the house, Clarke and Lexa cleaned up the house a little bit and when they were in bed, they managed to only make out until they fell asleep. Clarke fell asleep first, her head resting on Lexa’s chest as Lexa was the second to fall, arms wrapped comfortably around the blonde.

\----

 

“Lexa. Lexa, are you awake?”

Lexa slowly blinked her eyes open and stared at Clarke’s face.

“No.” Lexa mumbled as she turned around.

Clarke giggled softly. “Babe come on.”

“What?” Lexa’s voice muffled into her pillow.

Suddenly she felt Clarke jumping on the bed and gently climbing on her back. Lexa let out a sound that she was clearly not very comfortable, but still she didn’t want Clarke to move away. Clarke kissed her back and shoulders before whispering in her ear.

“I’m hungry.”

Lexa sighed and let out a laugh. “Then go make us breakfast.”

“Hmm nope.” Clarke suddenly took Lexa’s earlobe gently between her teeth and kissed it. It was a weird but comfortable feeling. “I was hoping you could make us some.”

Lexa laughed. “What do I get out of it?”

“What do you- Breakfast, obviously. Food.” Clarke said obvious and rested  her head right next to Lexa’s, kissing her cheek this time.

With one movement Lexa turned them around and started kissing Clarke’s neck, her chest and belly.

Clarke arched her back but backed Lexa off with her hand on her forehead. They locked eyes, Lexa left with a question mark.

“I want breakfast.” Clarke said seriously.

“Rather than sex?” Lexa said surprised.

“Uh, yeah?”

“I feel offended.”

Clarke sat up straight with a smile and pecked Lexa’s lips before standing up.

“Well, I feel hungry.”

Clarke walked to the door and opened it, waiting for Lexa to follow her.

Lexa gave her a warm smile and couldn’t help but follow her anyway. Even in the morning without any effort to look beautiful, she looked absolutely gorgeous.

 

\----

 

They both ate their omelets and pancakes with chocolate (which Lexa totally made). Lexa hadn’t noticed how hungry she was until she took the first bite of her pancake. Clarke seemed to love it because she kept saying “I fucking love this” every five seconds.

“You look pretty hot when you cook.”

Lexa raised her eyebrows. “Do I?”

Clarke rolled her eyes and nodded. “Yeah.”

They both smiled and the room was filled in a comfortable silence. Lexa was almost finished when Clarke made her stop eating suddenly.

“I may have found a place for me to stay for a couple of months.”

Lexa’s eyes widened and swallowed hard. “What? When?”

“Thank you, I’m happy for me too.” She said sarcastically. “The day before yesterday.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m telling you now.” Clarke said a little irritated.

Lexa nodded. Could she ask this from Clarke? To tell her everything right away? They weren’t together.

“That’s great. I’m sorry. I am happy for you. Where is it?”

“Remember Octavia? She came back for that guy Lincoln. So she’s going to stay here for a while in an apartment. I can stay there as long as I want.”

Lexa nodded a little sadly. Not that she wasn’t happy for Clarke, she would just miss her when she was gone. She had been already used to Clarke being with her every day.

“That’s great, Clarke.”

Clarke smiled softly. “Yeah.”

Lexa smiled back.

“There’s something else.” Clarke started, hesitating.

Lexa swallowed loudly and for some reason she was nervous what Clarke was about to say. They still hadn’t talked about last night and she knew they had to. She didn’t know what to say about it. It wasn’t like Clarke felt like being in a relationship. So she thought.

“What is it?”

Clarke swallowed hard, followed by Lexa.

“I- I’ve been looking for jobs around here, ‘cause I can’t have my other job back.”

Lexa let out a slightly relieved sigh.

“Miss Adams is back for good as you know. But I may have found something else. Because I was looking around the other day and noticed your school is looking for a music teacher.”

Lexa’s eyes widened. “We are? So that means you’re gonna be my teacher again?”

“Woah not so fast. I haven’t applied to the job yet. I don’t know if I’m going to.”

“Because of me being there?”

Clarke smiled softly and then shrugged. “I don’t know if it’s a good idea. It might be the only decent job around here though…”

Lexa’s face lit up with a grin. She knew what this meant.

“I mean, I get it. But we wouldn’t be doing anything at school, you know? It’s not like we’re really together.”

Clarke smiled softly. “About that… Maybe we should talk about-”

“Good morning to you two.” They heard Indra say who just opened the door.

“Morning.” Clarke and Lexa said at the same time.

Lexa’s heart was almost pounding out of her chest. She wasn’t sure if their conversation or her mom walking in on them made her more nervous.

“Having breakfast?”

“Yeah, saved you some.” Lexa answered.

Indra smiled. “Thank you, that’s really sweet.”

Indra sat down next to Lexa and Clarke at the corner of the table and Lexa wasn’t sure who out of the two of them felt more awkward.

Indra started eating in silence, bot Clarke and Lexa staring at her and she noticed.

“Do I have something on my face?” Indra said as she raised an eyebrow.

Clarke and Lexa switched looks and answered at the same time.

“No.”

“Then what?”

“Nothing.” Clarke began. “I was just telling Lexa how much I love her pancakes.”

Indra smiled. “Well, you might be the only one.” She said jokingly.

Lexa’s jaw dropped and she heard Clarke laugh. “I feel so offended today.”

Indra laughed. “You do? You just can’t handle the truth.”

“Like you haven’t finished eating my pancakes in under one minute.”

“I was hungry.”

“Whatever.” Lexa smiled. She was glad this conversation was a light one. She didn’t know if she was ready to talk to Clarke about the two of them. She wanted to be ready.

 

\----

 

**Clarke 12:31 p.m.  
** _I told your mom I’m leaving tomorrow._

**Lexa 12:45 p.m.  
** _Tomorrow?? I thought you said the end of the week_

**Clarke 12:47 p.m.  
** _I know, but Octavia comes back earlier._

**Lexa 12:48 p.m.  
** _Oh okay._

**Clarke 12:48 p.m.  
** _I want to talk to you.. Like we planned on doing two days ago_

Lexa let out a sigh. Why didn’t she tell her earlier about leaving? She knew she had to talk to her. She was just scared for what Clarke had to say. What if she wanted to stop this? She was almost positive. Lexa shook her thoughts away and the sudden lump in her throat. She started typing.

 

**Lexa 12:51 p.m.  
** _Let me take you out for dinner tonight. We can talk after_

**Clarke 12:55 p.m.  
** _Sure. I’ll see you later._

‘Sure’? Lexa let out a sigh. If she wasn’t nervous before, she sure as hell was now.

 

\----

 

“This is nice.” Clarke said as she took a good look around the restaurant. They were one of the first ones. It was early anyway.

“Yeah, this is my favorite. It’s worth the half an hour drive. I’m sure we won’t find anyone we know here.”

Clarke smiled sadly but nodded.

They both took a seat on their table and ordered their drinks.

“You hungry?”

Clarke nodded. “Kind of.”

Lexa nodded.

Their conversations in the car and now weren’t awkward, rather tensioned. Lexa hated it. She never felt like this around Clarke.

“How do you feel about leaving tomorrow?”

Clarke sighed. “Mixed feelings really. I’m just hoping I can build something again. Everything they took away. Hopefully my lawyer can help me.”

“Lawyer?”

“Yeah I talked to my lawyer today. He’s going after that prick that took away everything from me.”

“I didn’t know you were going to see a lawyer.”

Clarke let out a deep sigh. “I guess didn’t tell you.”

“Why?”

“Your drinks ladies.” The waiter suddenly said as they both didn’t notice he was right next to them. He put the drinks down and left. Lexa noticed Clarke was getting slightly irritated or frustrated or mad. She couldn’t quite decide.

“Lexa-”

“No I get it. I knew this conversation wouldn’t end well.”

Clarke frowned sadly. “What do you mean?”

“Can we at least just enjoy dinner together and then we’ll talk?”

Clarke slightly nodded and stopped talking for a while. So did Lexa. This was not what Lexa meant by ‘enjoying their dinner’. At least she had one last meal with Clarke. But knowing she was distancing herself still hurt.

They both exchanged exactly two sentences at the dinner and when they got in to the car, Lexa had some trouble holding back what she really wanted to say.

“Clarke?”

“Hm?”

Lexa sighed and locked their eyes. Again a lump forming in her throat, but she swallowed it back. And then she asked the question she had been afraid to ask the whole damn week.

“What do you want?”

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.” Again a big swallow and she raised her voice. “You don’t tell me shit anymore, you’re in a rush to leave tomorrow and you’re getting mad every time I try to get closer to you. What do you want from me?”

Clarke remained silent. They were still in the parking lot and Lexa didn’t think she would have the strength to drive right now.

“You’re distancing yourself from me. Why? Why let me in when you’re just leaving anyway?” Lexa still raised her voice.

Clarke swallowed loudly and gave her a sad grin.

“Because I’m scared.”

Lexa frowned. “Of what?”

“Of this. Us.” She raised her voice. “I’m not planning on getting hurt again. First with my dad. After he died it felt like I lost everything. Then with Niylah. I lost the woman I loved. When I moved back to LA I lost everything all over again. And yes, you were the only one who was there for me but what if I lose you, too? Who or what will I have left?”

Lexa remained silent. The words still spooking around her head. This wasn’t what she expected.

“Jesus fucking Christ you think I’m gonna leave you? After opening up to you? After accepting we can’t be seen in public together which is all I wanna do? After letting you in to our house? Providing for you?”

Their conversation had turned into a screaming challenge and Lexa couldn’t tell who was winning.

“I never asked for that.”

“But you did. You did by letting me in. It’s not like I planned to fall for you.” Oh crap. She didn’t want to say it like that.

Clarke remained silent and after a while she spoke.

“Fall for me?”

Lexa swallowed hard. The words came out too easily. “I’m not going anywhere, Clarke.”

“I’m just having a hard time trusting people since everything happened. I feel like everyone is just the same.” She let out a shaky sigh.

“It’s okay, I understand.” Lexa grabbed her hand to comfort her. “Just give me a chance and you’ll see I can be mature. You’ll see you can trust me.” She said in her softest voice again.

Clarke only shrugged.

“Don’t forget I’ve lost everything, too when my parents died. I felt so alone I started to change and comfort myself into other girls’ beds after a while. I never wanted anything more than that in case they would also leave. And my condition never helped into getting me into a relationship.” Lexa sighed. “That changed when I met you, you know? I want to be with you.”

Clarke gently pinched Lexa’s hand in hers and gave her a sad smile.

“I’m scared, too. But you’re all I want.” Lexa continued. It felt great finally telling Clarke what she had been wanting to say all along.

Clarke smiled softly and brought their hands to her mouth to kiss Lexa’s.

“But I don’t want to push you. I don’t want to force you into doing anything you don’t want to.”

“I know. You’re one of the good guys, I know that.”

Lexa let out a tiny grin.

“But?”

Clarke sighed. “But you have to _promise_ me you won’t get fucking tired of me and leave me.”

Lexa smiled. “That’s the easiest promise I’ve ever made.”

Clarke let out a relieved sigh.

“So… What it I ask you to be my girlfriend? Is that okay?” Lexa blushed.

Clarke smiled wide from ear to ear. “That’s more than okay.”

Lexa smiled back and leaned in to kiss her. She felt Clarke’s comforting hand on her cheek, caressing her gently. She loved the way Clarke completely melt into her when she was so distant before.

She finally felt so relieved right now. She finally had something to hold on to. All of her insecurities of losing Clarke went away with one simple answer.

But it also made her scared. She never knew Clarke felt so fragile and she knew that if she couldn’t screw this up.

In other news, Clarke was Lexa’s girlfriend and she couldn’t be any happier right now.

“I really thought you wanted to stop this.” Lexa said breaking the kiss.

“Almost did. It’s why I didn’t tell you everything right away.”

“You have to promise me you won’t push me away.”

Clarke sighed and nodded, foreheads against each other’s.

“I’ll try. Just give me some time to get used to having a relationship again.”

Lexa nodded. “I’ve never been in one before so I think we both need to get used to this.”

Clarke nodded and pecked Lexa’s lips one last time before Lexa started the car. But Clarke stopped her.

“Where are we going?”

“Erm home?”

“Can we go somewhere else? I want to be alone with you for a while.”

How could Lexa say no to that? She didn’t even think twice before driving off to a place where they could be alone.

“The beach it is.”

 

\----

 

“If I would’ve known this I would have brought some blankets with me.”

Clarke chuckled, sitting between Lexa’s legs with Lexa sitting behind her on the beach.

“This is just fine.”

Lexa wrapped her arms around Clarke and placed a kiss on her shoulder.

“I’m going to miss you.”

Clarke laughed and caressed Lexa’s arms around her.

“Me too, but you can always come and visit me. I’m not that far away.”

“I know, I know. Still.”

“Don’t be such a drama queen.” Clarke laughed.

Lexa laughed and kissed Clarke’s neck. Clarke chuckled as Lexa touched her sensitive spots in her neck with her lips. Lexa smiled proudly when Clarke let out a tiny satisfied moan when being kissed.

“What are you doing?” Clarke said in a raspy voice as she tilt her head so Lexa had more access.

“Kissing my girlfriend.” Lexa smiled.

“Hmm You want to help me complete something on my bucket list?”

“What?”

Clarke turned her head to the side so Lexa could hear her whisper better. “Having sex on the beach. And by that I do not mean the drink.”

Lexa was too turned on to laugh right now thinking about having sex in public with Clarke screaming her name. She tried to calm down a little.

“What? No, what if we get caught?”

“Really? There is no one here.”

Lexa knew she had a point. Still, someone could just walk in on them like that.

“I don’t know Clarke.”

“Come on.” Clarke smiled as she reached for her belt in her pants. “It’s really dark and we’ll be quiet. Nobody will notice.”

Lexa let out a soft moan already as Clarke got in her pants and reached for her dick. Lexa immediately turned them around. She got on top of Clarke and captured her sweet lips. She settled between her legs and gently took off her shirt as Clare did the same with Lexa. The sand on their bodies felt weird and messy but that didn’t stop them from taking off their pants, followed by their underwear.

Their moans were getting louder by the second and Lexa roughly pushed inside of Clarke which caused her to moan loudly again.

Lexa shushed and started moving. She pulled out to only smash her hips back into Clarke. Clarke got a hold of Lexa’s butt with her feet as she tangled them around her. Lexa started thrusting harder and the desperate kisses they were getting even more desperate.

When suddenly Lexa stopped abruptly.

“Do you hear that?”

“No?”

“Shh. Listen.”

Clarke listened closely for a while.

“I don’t-”

Suddenly they both heard it. Laughing.

“Oh shit.” Clarke said as she pushed Lexa off of her.

“I told you we wouldn’t be alone.” Lexa panicked as she pulled up her painful briefs over her erection.

“Will you just hurry.” Clarke hissed back as she rushed getting into her clothes.

Lexa did as she was told when the laughing they just heard came closer.

“Hurry.” Clarke whispered as she waited for Lexa getting into her pants.

“It hurts, okay?”

Clarke covered her mouth, feeling bad for Lexa as she took her cheeks between her hands. “I’m sorry baby but we really need to go.”

Right at that moment they saw a guy and a girl about Lexa’s age coming their way, hand in hand and they accidentally and very awkwardly locked eyes. Lexa with her pants on her knees and Clarke with Lexa’s face in her hands.

The guy and girl stopped laughing and the silence was way too awkward. Lexa just wanted to disappear. Right now.

“I needed to pee.” Was all Lexa said. Then she grabbed Clarke’s hand and walked to the car fast.

They both silently got in and tried to process what just happened.

Clarke was the first one to burst into laughter.

Lexa followed after a while.

“Oh no I can’t believe that just happened.” Clarke said as she covered her eyes with her hands. She leaned her head on Lexa’s shoulder as they both continued laughing.

“You needed to pee?!” Clarke screamed out in laughter.

“What else was I supposed to say?” Lexa laughed as well.

“Oh my god.” Clarke said as she tried calming down.

“I’m never listening to you again.” Lexa joked.

They both calmed down after a while.

“I can’t believe we just did that.”

Clarke smiled at Lexa and slowly leaned in to kiss her.

“Let’s finish what we started.”

 


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All I know is that I wrote far more words than I intended to for a fill up chapter

**Lexa 20:35 p.m.  
** _How’s everything going there? Still don’t need any help?_

**Clarke 20:47 p.m.  
** _Hey babes. Everything’s fine. Did you win?? You go get some rest after such a game._

**Lexa 20:48 p.m.  
** _Yeah we did :) And I don’t mind helping you move in. Besides, I’ve haven’t seen you in all day_

**Clarke 20:51 p.m.  
** _Hmmmm you sure you’re not tired? You know Octavia’s going to be here…_

 

**Lexa 20:53 p.m.  
** _I’m sure. I just want to see you_

**Clarke 20:54 p.m.  
** _Okay come over whenever you want_

**Lexa 20:55 p.m.  
** _See you in a bit_

\----

 

“Welcome to paradise.” Clarke greeted Lexa happily as she hugged her tight.

Lexa took a good look around and she was quite surprised that so many boxes were still unpacked.

“This is paradise?” Lexa blurted out. “Of what? Of boxes?”

Clarke gently hit her arm. “Don’t be like that. We’ve been working very hard to unpack everything. Especially Octavia’s stuff ‘cause I barely have anything. Right, O?” She shouted the last part so Octavia could hear her.

“Leave me alone.” They heard a voice say from afar. Then she came walking out of the kitchen and greeted Lexa happily.

“Hey Lexa, how are you?” Octavia asked gently.

“I’m fine. How are you? Coming back for love, huh?”

Octavia immediately blushed awkwardly.

“You tell everyone about my shit.” She told Clarke annoyed.

“Well, it’s not a bad thing.” Clarke laughed.

Octavia shrugged. “It sounds so desperate. And I’m not even in love with him.”

“That makes it even more desperate.” Clarke teased and poked her tongue between her teeth.

“Why are you my brother’s friend again?”

“He couldn’t resist my great sense of humor.”

Octavia rolled her eyes and laughed. “Pathetic.” She mumbled quietly.

“Well, I’m happy for you.” Lexa told her and Octavia gave her a sheepishy smile.

“Thanks. Now are you here to help or are you just going to stand there?”

Lexa let out a laugh and started getting to work. She unpacked everything and she helped move the furniture that didn’t have a place yet. The place was still a mess. Soon it was an hour and a half later when they could all finally sit down.

“You should’ve come earlier, Lexa.” Octavia began. “Clarke’s being too slow all day.”

“Excuse me Miss, I was unpacking all of _your_ stuff.” She laughed.

“Slowly.” Octavia finished.

Lexa let out a laugh and locked eyes with Clarke in front of her on the couch. She looked adorable today. In sweatpants, her hair tight up in a bun and an oversized sweater which Lexa was positive of it was hers.

“I’m starving.” Octavia suddenly said frustrated.

“Me too.” Clarke added.

“You guys didn’t eat anything?”

“Barely. Because Octavia here wanted to finish this as soon as possible.”

“Okay okay, so? We get some food now. Not a problem.” Octavia protested.

“Well, you go get us some then.” Clarke raised an eyebrow.

“I can go.” Lexa proposed.

“No, I’ll go. I want to get the hell out of here even if it’s just for a minute. I’m losing my mind in all these boxes.” Octavia said as she stood up and grabbed her coat.

“I’m getting us Chinese I don’t care what you want.” And with that she closed the door behind her, not even waiting for Clarke and Lexa to say something back.

They both remained silent for a while, both left a little speechless.

“She’s intense.” Lexa said dry.

Suddenly Clarke got up and threw herself on the couch next to Lexa and wrapped her arms around her, cuddling her. Lexa smiled and placed her arms around the blonde.

“You just have to get used to her. She’s just stressed right now.”

“Yeah.” Lexa placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. She still couldn’t believe they were a couple now. Clarke Griffin was her first girlfriend and she accepted her the way she was. With an extra limp.

Clarke hummed satisfied and let out a sigh.

“I’m glad you came by today.”

Lexa smiled, knowing Clarke couldn’t see her with her head in Lexa’s neck.

“Me too.”

“Sorry we have to be so secretive about this whole thing.”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not. It’s your first relationship and you can’t even let it show.”

Lexa smiled sadly. She hated this secretive thing, but she would never admit it. She was already lucky enough to be calling Clarke her girlfriend. Just not in public.

“I know what I signed up for. It’s fine.”

Clarke let out a deep sigh and tilt her head from Lexa’s shoulder to lock their eyes. Clarke had a worried look on her face. She parted her lips slightly to say something, but Lexa didn’t feel like talking about this anymore. She wanted to enjoy the moments with Clarke, not spend it overthinking about things like this.

So she leaned in quickly to kiss her. She captured Clarke’s sweet, soft lips like she had been wanting to do today.

The moment their lips touched, Clarke let herself completely go. Like she’d been waiting all day to do this. Lexa smiled at the thought as Clarke gently took her bottom lip into her mouth. She kept sucking it and Lexa couldn’t believe how much she had missed this today. It always made her dizzy in a great way when Clarke kissed her. She loved it.

The kiss was soft and gentle and it was all Lexa needed. She gently held Clarke’s waist and pulled her closer. She felt Clarke smile between the kiss when she did and grab her hand on her waist and pulled them on her lap. Clarke softly played with her fingers and then interlocked them. Lexa enjoyed the slow pace as Clarke sometimes brushed her tongue against her bottom lip. It was a sweet feeling. Probably because Clarke always tasted so sweet.

When suddenly Clarke came up for a little air, smiling.

“What?”

Lexa stared at the way she licked her lips. “I was thinking today. Maybe I should apply for the job at your school.”

Lexa smiled. “Yeah?” Lexa sucked kisses into her neck which made Clarke whimper.

“Hmyeah.”

“So we could basically do this all day?”

Clarke let out a laugh. “You wish.”

Lexa laughed and kissed her cheek one more time.

Clarke laughed, too and then finally let out a sigh. She intertwined their fingers.

“But seriously, I’m going to apply for the job tomorrow because there’s nothing else for me in the area. There aren’t many job applications for music teachers around here.”

Lexa nodded. “I get it. I hope they hire you. I mean, I would hire you.”

Clarke snorted. “Of course you would.”

Suddenly the front door opened with a force that could’ve crashed the whole building.

“I’ve got food!” Octavia yelled when coming in and Clarke didn’t know how fast she flew away from Lexa.  

Octavia didn’t even notice they were sitting almost onto each other’s laps as she unpacked the food she brought with her.

They all silently sat down around the table and starting eating in silence, Lexa in front of Clarke. They exchanged smiled before they sat down and Lexa almost gave herself away when she made Clarke whimper once touching her thigh with her foot.

 

 

\----

 

**Lexa 3:34 p.m.  
** _You ready?_

**Clarke 3:36 p.m.  
** _A little nervous, but ready_

**Lexa 3:37 p.m.  
** _I’m sure you’re gonna rock it. Do you want me to wait after you later?_

**Clarke 3:39 p.m.  
** _Thanks babe. No it’s okay, you can go home. I’ll talk to you later tonight_

Lexa pouted a little. She wanted to wait here for Clarke. She hadn’t seen her in a week and it felt weird. They were both extremely busy, Clarke with still moving in and Lexa with school and baseball. But now Lexa felt like just waiting for her after school till Clarke was done with the interview.

Lexa didn’t exactly know why, but she felt really nervous for Clarke. The fact that she’s seen Clarke so broken like a few weeks ago, made her scared. She hated seeing Clarke like that, devastated when they took everything away from her. Even though Lexa couldn’t do anything else than taking her home for a little while, she still felt so powerless. She wished all the best for Clarke.

She wanted to make her happy.

Conclusion: they had to hire her as music teacher at her school. And not just so she could see her every day. Although that was a big con.

Lexa sighed and started typing.

 

**Lexa 3:43 p.m.  
** _Okay babe, good luck. I’ll talk to you later_

Yeah. She was definitely going to wait after class for her. Just to surprise her.

 

**Clarke 3:44 p.m.  
** _Thanks!! xxx_

Lexa smiled. She couldn’t wait to just hold Clarke for a long while.

The bell rang after a few minutes and Lexa took her time, even went to buy herself some food and waited outside on a bench. For a long time. It was almost an hour later but Clarke hadn’t come out of the school yet which made Lexa wonder if she had missed her. Maybe this interview was going so well they made her sit it out for an hour.

Well, that didn’t make sense.

4:48 p.m. Lexa looked around her. She was the only one at school which was very, very rare. She never knew how fast to get out of school. Oh well, today she drove to school anyway so no rush to get to the bus.

“Lexa? What are you still doing here?”

Lexa jumped and saw her teacher standing in front of her.

“Hi, Mr. Kane. Uh, I’m just waiting for a friend.”

Kane nodded understandably.

“This late?”

Lexa shrugged and nodded, not wanting to explain.

And with that he walked away. Lexa didn’t know how to respond to it so she said nothing at all.

Another ten minutes passed when Lexa heard the sound of heals and it made her jump again. She stood up and waited patiently until someone walked out the door.

Her face lit up when finally saw Clarke walking out.

After two seconds Clarke realized Lexa was there and smiled wide.

“Hey! What are you doing here? You didn’t wait for me, did you?”

Lexa smiled. She just wanted to kiss her. To hold her. But it had to wait. Not at school.

“Guess I’m stubborn.”

She warmed Lexa’s heart with her pretty smile and made her follow her by grabbing her forearm.

“How did it go?”

“Well, I guess it went well. But you never know.”

Lexa nodded in agreement.

“I’m sure you did just fine.”

Clarke stopped walking when they were a few miles away from school. She looked around her and smiled.

“I’m glad you waited anyway.” Clarke admitted shyly.

Lexa smiled softly. “I just wanted to see you. Did you walk all the way to here? You want me to take you home?”

Clarke nodded and sighed relieved. “That’d be great.”

They both walked to the car and Lexa drove off in silence. Clarke gently reached for her right hand on the steering wheel and intertwined their fingers. Lexa loved when she did that. It made her gasp silently at the contact. Clarke caressed her thumb over Lexa’s hand and it felt so relaxing but at the same time Lexa’s heart was pounding fast.

“Why don’t you stay for a while? You want to eat with us?” Clarke asked when they almost arrived at her apartment.

“I’d like that. Is Octavia going to be there?”

“I’m afraid so.” Clarke sighed.

“I’ll behave.” Lexa sighed annoyed.

Clarke laughed. “Yeah you do that.”

Lexa parked the car in front of the apartment and got out of the car. They both silently walked upstairs. Lexa enjoying the short dress Clarke was rocking, her hair down in waves and heals. She just never thought she would have such a beautiful girlfriend. She never thought Clarke Griffin would be her girlfriend.

They silently got in the elevator and waited until it was closed. When it did Lexa turned to Clarke and smiled softly.

“Have I told you that you look really beautiful today?”

Clarke let out a laugh.

“Just today huh?” She teased.

Lexa rolled her eyes and laughed, when she felt Clarke’s hand on her waists, pulling her in for a kiss.

Lexa put her hands on her hips and held her close. She felt Clarke completely melt into her arms as she let out the tiniest satisfied sigh. She claimed her lips over and over again when the elevator made a sound which meant they were on the third floor already.

Clarke quickly pulled away and waited for the doors to open. A handful of people were waiting and greeted them gently as Clarke took Lexa’s hand and walked to Clarke’s apartment. Lexa chuckled as Clarke opened the door and didn’t get greeted by Octavia, because surprisingly she wasn’t there.

“Hello?”

Silence.

“O?” Clarke tried again.

Clarke shrugged.

“Guess she isn’t home yet. Will you help me cook?” She turned to Lexa who was looking at her dirty and it seemed like Clarke knew exactly what Lexa wanted.

Clarke tilt her head to one side. “No… We’re going to cook. Make food.”

Lexa laughed because Clarke knew her so well and then pouted.

Clarke smiled and once again took Lexa’s lips into her mouth passionately, only for a little while. Lexa’s hands wandered to Clarke’s lower back and right before she moved any lower, Clarke stopped her with her own hands.

“That’s all you’re getting today.” Clarke whispered against her lips and backed away to the kitchen.

Lexa’s lips felt puffy from the kiss and her eyes followed Clarke. She really had missed her this week.

While Clarke picked some water for cooking, Lexa wrapped her arms around her from behind and placed a gentle kiss in her neck.

Clarke let out a whimper.

“Lexa?”

“Hm?”

“I’ve been wanting to ask you this before, but I never did.”

Lexa placed another gentle kiss between her shoulders.

“Okay.”

“Have you ever… you know. Did you ever get drunk again after everything?” She turned around to lock eyes now with Lexa.

“No.” Lexa said honestly. “Have you?”

Clarke shook her head. “Doesn’t mean I never wanted to.”

“What do you mean?”

Clarke sighed. “After everything that’s happened. I sure could use a couple of drinks.”

Clarke paused for a moment and Lexa could hear and feel the pain she was carrying around. It made her mad. It made her feel helpless.

“You helped me get through it though.” Clarke finished with a tiny broken smile. “You really did. You supported me by stopping with drinking alcohol as well.” Clarke.

“Well, you know. Ditto.”

Clarke smiled and placed her arms around Lexa’s neck to pull her closer.

“Who would’ve thought this would happen to us.” Clarke breathed low against her lips.

Lexa smiled and leaned in to kiss her when the front door flew open.

“Hello! Oh. Hello. Am I interrupting something?” Octavia said while covering her eyes with both hands.

Both Lexa and Clarke’s cheeks burned red and let each other go.

“No. You know you can open your eyes. We’re not doing anything.” Clarke said.

“It didn’t look like you weren’t doing anything. I didn’t know you two were-”

“ _Don’t_ finish that sentence.” Clarke blurted out.

“What? Dating?” Octavia said while uncovering her eyes.

Clarke rolled her eyes and sighed.

“We are not dating.”

“We’re not?” Lexa said before thinking twice.

Clarke was giving her a death glare right now and Lexa wished Clarke could tell Octavia they were dating. But she couldn’t. Nobody could know.

“I mean, we’re not dating, Octavia.” Lexa tried to helplessly fix.

Octavia started laughing and grabbed an apple.

“You two clearly need to talk about this.” She said as she nonchalantly took a bite from her apple and walked away.

“Hey! Don’t walk away. We’re about to eat dinner soon.”

“Yeah I know what you two are having for dinner. Have fun with that. I’m off to Lincoln.”

But Clarke yelled before she could reach the door.

“We’re not dating!”

Octavia turned around one last time and nodded. “I won’t tell anyone if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“There is nothing to be worried about. Lexa and I aren’t together.”

Suddenly Lexa felt a strange feeling in her stomach. Clarke was putting way too much effort in hiding this relationship. Maybe it was a good thing. Still, Lexa didn’t feel great about it.

“She’s got it. We’re not together.” Lexa said simply and sat down on the couch.

“Yeah. Got it.” Octavia said with a wink and walked outside.

Clarke let out a deep sigh as she was still standing there. She turned to Lexa and gave her a tiny grin.

“Do you think she knows?”

Lexa scoffed. “She’s not stupid. Of course she knows. Even I almost believed you.”

Clarke let out a laugh but when she didn’t see Lexa smile, her laughing stopped. She sat down next to Lexa.

“What?” Clarke said confused.

“You don’t trust Octavia to know about us?”

“I thought be both agreed on not telling anyone.”

“Yeah, but she definitely knows now. She’s seen us practically humping each other.”

“Well...”

Lexa sighed and stood up to finish what Clarke started cooking.

Suddenly she felt two arms around her and a head between her shoulder blades, placing kisses there.

“Baby.” She said quietly. “I’m sorry. I panicked.”

“Yeah I saw.”

“Lexa.” She said louder now. It made Lexa turn around in her arms. “I’m sorry, I overreacted. I’m just scared because Octavia is a blurt out and since I dated her brother I didn’t know how she would-”

“You what?!”

“Oh.” Clarke breathed out.

“You dated her brother?”

“It was a long time ago. And not very long. It didn’t really mean anything.”

Lexa scoffed. “What are you talking about? Is that how you think about every relationships?” Lexa yelled.

Clarke scoffed ridiculously. “Lexa, come on.”

“I clearly don’t know much about you.”

Clarke sighed.

“You know the most important things.”

“Apparently not.”

Clarke sighed and remained silent for a while.

“Depends on what you call important.” Clarke continued.

Lexa turned around and nodded. “Right.” She walked to the fridge and didn’t notice Clarke followed her.

“Please, come here.” She stood with open arms, waiting for Lexa to come to her, but she didn’t. She just stood there, watching Clarke.

Clarke let out a deep sigh. “Okay.” She said softly. “I’m sorry.”

Lexa kept staring at her, not saying anything.

Clarke leaned against the dinner table and the silence was making Lexa feel calm but hardly bearable. What did she really know about Clarke’s background? She knew the way she was right now and that is important. But Clarke has never given away much about when she was a kid or teenager. Lexa always wondered why, but it never occurred to her to ask her all about it. Not until now.

“His name is Bellamy. I dated him for like a year when I was nineteen years old. We broke up as friends, so yes, we are still friends. No hard feelings. He’s like my big brother, I’m like his little sister.” She paused and still, Lexa didn’t say anything. This didn’t make her feel any better.

“You should know that with Niylah it was completely different. I loved her. And to be honest, I never thought I would get over her. But I did.”

“That’s unfortunate.” Lexa said a little too harsh. She knew Clarke noticed by the disappointed look on her face.

“I don’t have any secrets for you, Lexa. You know how I feel about you. There’s no need to be so insecure about it.”

Lexa sighed. “I’m not insecure.” She mumbled.

Clarke gave her a sad smile.

“It was really hard for me to trust anyone after Niylah. And it still is sometimes. But I never meant to make you feel insecure because I feel insecure about myself.”

Lexa locked eyes with Clarke. She hated that Clarke felt insecure. How could she not?

“You don’t need to feel insecure.”

Clarke smiled softly. Like the whole world was at ease again. “Neither do you.” Clarke held out her hand. “Come on. I’ll tell you everything you want to know. From my favorite color to why I barely talk to my mom anymore. Because I do trust you.”

Lexa hesitated for a second before she grabbed Clarke’s hand and let her drag herself to the couch. Clarke smiled softly and kissed her hand gently when they sat down.

“Green.” Lexa suddenly said. Clarke looked at her in confusion.

“Hm?”

“Your favorite color is green.”

Clarke smiled wide.

“It is. You do pay attention when I talk. Congratulations.”

Lexa finally let out an inaudible laugh and shook he head.

“But I haven’t told you everything about my life. And that has to do with my mom.”

Clarke sighed deeply before Lexa gently pinched her hand to let her know she was here for her.

“My mom.” She scoffed. “She is quite something. And I don’t mean that in a good way.”

Lexa looked her in the eyes and she could see the pain in there. Lexa’s heart was beating out of her chest and she didn’t know what to do for Clarke. She just wanted to be here for her.

“My mom has never loved me.” Clarke blurted out.

“Clarke, that’s nonsense why would-”

“It’s not. She confirmed it. When my dad died.”

Lexa remained silent. Suddenly feeling guilty for the blonde.

“She send me to this private religious school after my dad died. I was sixteen years old, just lost my dad and my mom didn’t want me in her presence. So yes, it was rough.”

Lexa’s eyes widened and she took both of Clarke’s hands in hers, caressing and kissing them. “I’m so sorry. I- I didn’t know. I don’t know what to say.”

Clarke gave her a sad smile.

“You don’t have to say anything. It didn’t stop there though. My mom’s a doctor and she always wanted me to become a doctor as well. She wanted me to have a rich husband, a decent job and she wanted me to have a billion kids.” She laughed sadly. “But I never wanted any of that. I wanted to become a musician. Or I wanted to be a music teacher. Anything with music. And my dad always supported me, you know?”

Lexa nodded carefully and stroke her hand with her thumb.

“So, when my dad died she blamed me for it. I tried so hard for her to love me. Care for me. Anything. She keeps telling me it’s my fault he died. He gave all his money to my school career while it could’ve saved him some more time. But I never knew he did that for me until after he died.”

Lexa was positive now she had tears in her eyes. She felt helpless. She wanted to do something. To take this pain away from her even if it was just for a little while. But all she could do was hug her. And she did. Holding her tight.

Clarke immediately melted into her arms. They didn’t stay long like that before Clarke pulled away. Lexa wiped away a tear running down her cheek. Her guilt was growing by the second.

“You don’t have to tell me.” She said softly. “It’s okay.”

“No, I want you to know. I want to be able to talk about this without crying. I already failed, but at least you made me talk about it. I don’t ever do that. I try to avoid conversations about my past.”

Lexa nodded carefully, waiting for her patiently to continue. She knew exactly how Clarke felt. She never talked about certain things either. Like when her parents died. She knew how painful it could be only thinking about it.

“Bellamy has always been my best friend from the start. I met him in middle school and I’ve always seen him as my big brother. But my mom and Bellamy’s mom kind of forced us to get into a relationship with each other. Well, they didn’t really force us, but Bellamy and I were both fighting for attention from our moms at that time. His mom’s shitty like that, too. So we gave it a try. Totally a mistake.” Clarke laughed through her sadness. “You can imagine how my mom reacted when she heard we broke up and when I got a girlfriend a while later.”

“Niylah?” Lexa clarified.

Clarke nodded.

“So you stopped talking to your mom?”

“She stopped talking to me. She got a new boyfriend and forgot about me. Niylah was all I had after I got out of college.”

Lexa nodded understandably.

“But that’s still no excuse to treat you badly, so I’m really sorry.” Clarke said. “I’ll try harder.”                                                                                                              

Lexa scoffed. She didn’t hesitate once to forgive Clarke. It wasn’t all that bad anyway. Clarke is just still trying to find her place in a relationship and so was Lexa. They were basically both new to this.

“It’s okay, baby. I’m sorry you had to go through that. At least I know now.” She said softly.

Clarke gave her a tiny smile and once again, took her hand into hers and kissed it.

“Blue.” Clarke said after a moment of silence.

“Blue what?”

Clarke laughed. “Your favorite color.”

Lexa laughed at last. “Yes.” How could it not be her favorite color when she looked into Clarke’s damn pretty blue eyes every time?

Lexa scooted closer and leaned in to gently kiss her. She rested her hands on her waist and with her lips she tasted some of Clarke’s salty tears on her lips.

Lexa pulled away after Clarke calmed down a little and sighed.

“I was in the same car as my parents when they got the accident.”

Clarke frowned and had a confusing look on her face.

Lexa shrugged. “I was the only one out of the three who survived. And I can’t stop asking myself why. Why me?”

Lexa didn’t mean to ever talk about this. It made her feel anxious and empty but most of all, guilty.

“Sometimes I feel like it was all my fault.”

“How could you ever think that?”

Lexa shrugged again. She swallowed the painful lump in her throat away. “We went to see a movie together. The three of us. It was a movie for kids. If I hadn’t whined about wanting to go see that stupid movie they never-”

“Lexa stop.” Clarke cupped her cheeks and all Lexa wanted was to swallow the damn lump away in her throat and not break in front of Clarke. She tried her best not to do so.

“I know it’s hard to convince you of something you don’t believe, but this is not your fault.”

Lexa sighed. “Fucking asshole who drove through red light.”

Clarke nodded and gently caressed her cheeks with her thumb.

“What did he get?”

“Nothing. Idiot killed himself too in the accident.”

Clarke nodded understandably. There was an odd look in Clarke’s eyes. Lexa couldn’t quite put her finger on it. Concerned? Pity? Worried? Maybe she felt sorry for her and she hated that.

“Don’t look at me like that.”

Clarke scoffed softly. “Like what?”

“Like that. Like you feel sorry for me.”

“Is it so bad that I do? Because I think you don’t deserve this?”

Lexa stared deeply into those bright blue eyes and she almost forgot what they were talking about.

“Yes.”

“You don’t always have to be tough, Lexa. Especially not in front  of me.”

Lexa let out a deep sigh.

“I’m not trying to look tough. I mean. Not really.”

Clarke smiled sadly and pulled Lexa closer to place a gentle kiss on her lips. The kiss quickly turned into a heated, open mouthed kiss and everything Lexa wanted to tell Clarke, she felt like she explained it in their kiss. Every emotion. Passionate. Messy.

Lexa’s head was spinning with everything she was feeling at the moment. She knew she couldn’t talk about this anymore and Clarke somehow knew. So she kept kissing her. Hands wandering all over her. Pulling her closer. Gently grabbing her neck with both hands, because one was never enough to explain how much Clarke needed her.

Finally Clarke pulled away and they both breathed loudly, foreheads against each other and she laughed silently, followed by Lexa.

“What?”

Clarke smiled and placed a sweet kiss on her cheek. “Nothing. I’m just glad I was able to tell you.”

Lexa smiled. “Me too.”  

 

\----

 

“Who can show me these chords on the piano?” Finn asked his class, nobody listening.

Finally the bell rang before someone became his victim. Lexa grabbed her phone out of her bag and stood up. She noticed a bunch of text messages from Clarke.

 

**Clarke 2:55 p.m.  
** _Guess what??_

**Clarke 2:56 p.m.  
** _Can I call you?_

 

**Clarke 2:59 p.m.  
** _Lexa you’re litterally always on your phone except when I have the greatest news ever oh my god_

**Clarke 3:01 p.m.  
** _Okay I’m just going to say it……_

Lexa got interrupted by Finn talking again.

“Before I forget, I have some important news for you. We have a new music teacher and she’s going to have your class, too. I’ll still be here. She and I are just going to take shifts. That’s all. Have a nice weekend.”

Lexa’s stomach dropped as she looked back to her phone, reading the last text message left.

 **  
  
Clarke 3:01 p.m.  
**_Say hello to your new music teacher Mrs. Griffin!_ ****  
  



	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while...

Lexa didn’t know exactly why she felt nervous about going to school today. She should be excited for seeing Clarke at school. And she was. It was just about the fact that eyeing Clarke made her want to do things to her that only felt natural. Like kissing her. Hugging her. Hell, even just seeing her smile could already make Lexa forget about all the bad things in her life.

But she couldn’t. People would suspect things that could end both of their careers. So unfortunately the only thing that went through Lexa’s mind right know was: more hiding. They had to hide their relationship from everyone. If she didn’t hate it before, she sure as hell did now.

Lexa drove to school by herself today so she could be there a little on time. She wanted to quickly drop by the music’s classroom to say hi to Clarke, like they had agreed on through texts last night. When she got at school, twenty minutes early, she walked straight to the music’s classroom. It was closed and she hesitated for a while before she pushed it open.

To her surprise, Clarke was not alone.

“Oh uh, hi.” Lexa said awkwardly. She stared at the two music teachers. She forgot completely about Finn also being here and it made her want to fight him by standing right next to Clarke, but she controlled herself.

It was Clarke who got Lexa’s full attention by wearing a black, tight skirt she looked so good in, her hair up in a bun. And let’s not forget her eyes that were wide open, surprised to see Lexa here.

“Lexa, you’re early. Can I help you?” Finn stepped forward.

Lexa cringed at the word ‘I’. Out of everyone here, he was the only one she didn’t need help from.

“Um. I’m just- I was-”

Clarke had her eyebrows furrowed, eyes worried as she saw Lexa struggling. But Lexa had a fluent mouth. She could talk herself out of every situation.

“I just came in earlier today in hope I could speak with you for a moment. It’s about the extra classes.”

For a moment, Finn narrowed his eyes, and then nodded.

“Yes, of course. By the way, this is Mrs. Griffin, your new music teacher. But you two already met, haven’t you?” He introduced the two as they both remained professional about it.

“Yes, she was my student. Nice to see you again, Lexa.” Clarke’s sound was steady and professional and to Lexa’s surprise, it turned her on.

“You need help with passing your class. I’m assuming it’s what you want to talk about?” Finn turned to face Lexa.

“Yes.” Lexa said as they all sat down. Clarke crossed her arms and tried to not look eyes with Lexa. She understood why, nobody could suspect anything.

“I’m assuming you want to pass this class in order to stay captain of your team.”

“That’s correct.”

“Like I told you before, we organize extra lessons after school. I think you need them.”

Lexa’s head just exploded. Extra class after school? Not her way to go. But she couldn’t talk herself out of this.

“Wait a second.” Clarke interrupted them. “I know I’m not in the place to tell you what to decide, but I do know Lexa worked very hard to get where she’s at right now. She doesn’t need any more classes. She just needs motivation.”

Lexa’s chest warmed itself by Clarke’s words. She couldn’t express how grateful she was right now that somebody had her back.

“I believe not getting kicked out of her baseball team is motivation enough.”

“Yes it is. But I don’t think it’s completely fair to compare someone who’s just started playing an instrument to others who have been playing instruments their whole lives.”

Finn threw her a smile that made Lexa almost want to choke him.

“I guess you’re right. But I don’t believe in Lexa the same way as you do. I want her to prove to me that she’s putting effort in her drumming.”

Clarke opened her mouth to say something, but Lexa realized she could take it from here. She could talk for herself now.

“I understand perfectly, Mr. Collins. I will pass this mini concert for you by showing my hard work from the last few weeks and I won’t be kicked out of my baseball team.” She would do anything to stay with her team. Staying with her team meant a possible scholarship.

“And you will continue to show your hard work here. I mean it, Lexa.”

Lexa nodded eagerly. She hated how nice this shitface was being to her right now. Only because Clarke was here and he wanted to show her how nice he was. Lexa almost puked in her mouth. But then again, Clarke had spared her classes after school and she knew she owed her. But the fact that Finn was going to be here all the time with Clarke made her feel angry from the inside. A few months ago she would’ve probably drank too much to forget about this feeling.

“I will. Thank you, Mr. Collins.”

She threw a glare at Clarke before walking out of the classroom. The moment their eyes met Clarke’s lips curled deliciously up in a smile and all Lexa wants to do was kiss her, but the only thing she did was smile back politely and walk away.

They day passed painfully slow today and when Lexa finally finished at 4 p.m. she went back to the music’s classroom after texting Clarke if she was alone.

Lexa was sure now to open the door and she finally met with only Clarke who was seated behind her desk. She closed the door and walked over to her.

“Hi gorgeous.” Lexa smiled as she finally, _finally_ pressed her lips to Clarke’s. She never thought someone’s lips could feel so good. And yet, Lexa found herself kissing her over and over again.

“Hi there.” Clarke smiled back.

Lexa sat down on her desk, watching Clarke write something.

“How was your first day?”

Clarke let out a tired sigh and put down her pen.

“It was alright, but tiring. There’s just a lot coming at me right now and I’m not sure if I’ll manage.”

Lexa was already searching for Clarke’s hands and intertwined their fingers.

“Of course you’ll manage. You’re ridiculously good at what you do, Clarke. You can do this.”

Clarke gently squeezed her hands as she warmed Lexa’s heart with her beautiful, joyful smile.

“I hope so. It feels good to have your support.”

“Of course. And it felt good to have _your_ support back there today. Thanks for backing me with Finn.”

“Yeah, of course.” Clarke gave her one last squeeze and stood up to organize the instruments in the room.

“So, did he say or do anything to you?”

Lexa watched as Clarke got on her knees to grab some things from the floor but then remembered she was wearing a skirt and got up again.

“Could you pick that up for me, please?” She asked Lexa and she did as she was told. “But yes, we talked about stuff. You know, small talk. The way things work here at school.”

“I thought he was mad at you.”

“I guess he’s not anymore.”

Lexa let out a sigh. Clarke was dodging her question and she always did that when she had something to hide.

“You’re keeping something from me.”

“No, Lexa. I just want to be the peacekeeper here. You should know that Finn is the reason that I’m here. He’s the reason they hired me.”

“Did he say that? Because it’s completely bullshit. _You_ are  the reason they hired you. You worked for it. Stop giving him credits.”

Clarke sighed deeply and the silence in the room scared Lexa. It made her feel anxious. “Lexa, they weren’t even looking for a new teacher here. He recommended me here and they invited me for a talk.”

Lexa braced herself, swallowing the lump in her throat away before the words leave her mouth.

“You lied to me?” Her voice was soft, tender.

“I didn’t. I just left out the part of Finn recommending me to them.”

“You lied to me.” Lexa’s voice was steadier right now, almost imperious. She didn’t know how to feel about this. Grateful that Clarke was here but mad she lied about it.

“Look, I’m sorry. You’re right, I should’ve told you way earlier. But I knew you would react like this. You don’t understand how much I need the money.”

“I do understand, that’s why we invited you in our house. I do understand, Clarke. Don’t keep things from me.”

Clarke let out a sigh and stepped closer to Lexa, carefully wrapping her arms around Lexa’s waist, but Lexa kept her arms crossed.

“I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to. I just didn’t know how to tell you.”

Lexa made a fist as tight as she could. She tried calming herself down but somehow she felt betrayed. Clarke didn’t give her much time though to let her feel this way because she pulled her into her embrace and tightened her grip.

“You know, all the time I could only think about the fact that I can’t lose this job. Truth is, I’d rather lose this job than I’d lose you.”

Lexa’s heart fluttered at the words and finally slipped her arms around her and let her body rest against Lexa’s. She understood in a way why Clarke kept it from her, but she didn’t want that.

“I don’t want to be one of those couples who need to keep things from each other because they’ll get mad otherwise. I don’t want to fight with you.”

She felt Clarke nod against her chest.

“Me neither. I’m sorry. This was all me.”

They locked eyes and Lexa nodded, her brows furrowed.

“Still getting used to a new relationship. The trusting part as well.” Clarke said softly.

Lexa leaned in to bring their lips together. She knew Clarke had been hurt and left behind too many times now. She needed Clarke to know she understood. And she explained it in her kiss, no words.

“I’m still here.”

Clarke nodded and her lips pressed another kiss to Lexa’s lips.

“I know. Thank god. And speaking of better communication, I talked to my lawyer today. He said I wasn’t the only victim by those guys. Me and another nine people went through the same thing. So we have to inform the police again and hopefully they’ll search for them.”

“That’s good news Clarke. I mean, not good news, but you’re not alone in this. Hopefully they’ll find them.”

Clarke nodded.

“I hope so, too. I’m just going to finish up some work here. You should come over later. Octavia will be there with Lincoln.”

“You want me to be there? With Octavia? And Lincoln?”

Clarke rolled her eyes and squeezed Lexa’s hands one last time before letting her go.

“Octavia already knows about us so I don’t see the problem.”

Lexa’s smile grew wide. “There isn’t. I’ll be there.”

“Good. Go home. I’ll see you later.”

Clarke gave her a desperate kiss before Lexa drove back home.

 

\----

 

“Hi again.” Clarke opened the door happily to greet Lexa and immediately pecked her lips. Every time their lips touched, it felt better than the kiss before. It felt like the first time they kissed.

“Hi.”

Lexa smiled and walked over to Lincoln and Octavia and introduced herself to Lincoln.

“So you’re the student.”  

“Lincoln.” Octavia hissed.

“Yes, and that makes you the guy who made Octavia stay in the city.”

“Yes I am.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“Pleasures all mine. You did something we as teenage boys couldn’t figure out. Dating a teacher.” He shook his head, laughing.

“Lincoln, go easy on her.” Octavia said again.

Lexa smiled proudly. She guessed you could look at it that way.

“She can stand up for herself.” Clarke said as she settled next to Lexa on the couch and tangled her fingers in her long, brown locks. She loved when Clarke did that.

“How old are you again?” Lincoln leaned his elbows on his knees, impressed by the brunette.

“Eighteen.”

“Nice.” Lincoln said proudly.

Lexa laughed and had a feeling they would get along pretty well. She rested her arm on the couch, right behind Clarke.

“It’s less fun than you think, you know?” They all eyed Lexa and Clarke had an eyebrow raised, waiting for Lexa’s full explanation. “I mean, the hiding part and all. I can’t just talk to her at school whenever I want to, I can’t tell my friends. I can’t be with her whenever I want to. And not just at school. It’s a small neighborhood, you know? People talk.”

Lincoln’s happy expression disappeared. She could tell it wasn’t what he wanted to hear. He only wanted to hear about the good stuff. Which was no problem either. Lexa could write a whole book about how perfect Clarke was.

“That’s right. Which is why we trust you to not tell anyone about us.” Clarke added.

“Yeah, of course. Octavia already told me it was supposed to be a secret. Don’t worry, I won’t talk about it to anyone.”

Both Lexa and Clarke gave him a thankful nod and Lexa eyed Clarke. She was smiling. She was smiling at Lexa like she was the only thing that mattered at this moment and it took Lexa’s breath away. She hadn’t even noticed Clarke was walking around in her pajamas. It didn’t matter to Lexa. Clarke’s was always breathtakingly beautiful.

“Brush that cocky look away from your face.” Clarke smiled as she leaned into Lexa’s body, her head in her neck as Lexa’s lips brushed over her hair, pressing little kisses there, still a cocky look on her face.

“She has the right to be.” Lincoln said and stood up to give Lexa a high five. Energetic guy, she thought and smiled. “You did pretty damn good.”

“Okay now, we get it. Teacher, student, together, having sex, it’s great. Now turn on the television instead of turning on yourself.” Octavia snapped.

Clarke and Lexa remained silent, not feeling the urge to explain themselves again.

“Hey, I got a text from my mom today. She wants me to come over and have dinner with her tomorrow. She knows about me breaking up with Niylah so that’s probably why.” Clarke started after a while.

“Isn’t that a good thing?”

“I don’t know. She never asked me to come over when I was with Niylah. She only asks me when I’m single or when I’m with a guy.”

“So you don’t want to go?”

“I’m not sure. I feel like I owe her for lending me money.”

“Maybe you should just give it a chance. She’s still your mom.”

“Yeah maybe you’re right.” Clarke sighed. “I’ll decide tomorrow.”

The evening was cozy, they watched a movie in peace. Finally some enjoyable, peaceful moments with Clarke. She could get used to this.

And with Lincoln and Octavia of course, but she didn’t even mind. She liked them. They were pretty alright. She had already won respect from Lincoln by dating a teacher. Only if he knew Clarke was so much more than just a teacher. She was the one who made Lexa believe there was no evil in the world, by only looking into those sea blue eyes.

The next day Lexa drove to school again, having music class from Finn today drove her crazy. He and Clarke were taking shifts, so today was Finn’s class. The odd thing about the class was that Finn was still weirdly nice to Lexa. As if Clarke was still in the classroom.

The bell finally rang and Lexa collected her stuff to go home when a voice made her stop.

“Lexa, can you wait a second. I want to talk to you.”

Lexa swallowed loudly and nodded. It was never good news when a teacher would say that to you. She knew from experience.

“Sure.”

Meanwhile everyone walked out of the classroom, Lexa overthought every bad thing she ever did at school. Maybe she was being punished. Maybe he found out about her and Clarke. Could it be?

“Thank you for staying.”

Lexa shrugged coldly. It was not like she wanted to wait.

“I want to talk to you about something and it’s weird coming from a teacher I believe. I mean, it’s even weird I’m asking a student for help, especially you.”

Lexa crossed her arms and knit her brows together.

“You know I haven’t been completely fair to you and I’m trying to change that. I just noticed Mrs. Griffin has faith in you and somehow she likes you. She sees something in you I can’t quite see and I wonder how that’s possible.”

Lexa tilt her head curiously but irritated.

“I just notice you get along well with Mrs. Griffin. Am I right?”

“Kind of. So?”

“So? So, does she ever talk about me when you’re speaking?”

Lexa was making a fist again, still trying to remain peaceful. But believe her when she said it was the hardest thing she had to do.

“Not that I know off.” She said cold, trying to focus on something else than her anger.

“She doesn’t? Okay well, I know she’s single because I asked her.”

Lexa loosened her fists. Clarke saying that bothered her more than she could explain. But she understood. They had both agreed on this secret relationship.

“Can you give me any, you know, directions on what she likes?”

“Excuse me?” Lexa raised her voice and it scared both Finn and her.

“I mean, I know she likes music. What else?”

“I don’t know her that well.” Was all she said.

Finn let out an annoyed chuckle. “That’s all you got? Come on, buddy to buddy, help me out here.”

“I’m not your buddy.”

“Huh. I thought I helped you out by giving you an extra chance for passing this class.”

“You didn’t. Mrs. Griffin just convinced you yesterday.”

“Ah, yes. Mrs. Griffin. Such a sweetheart. You know, that’s what I like most about her. She cares about people. And I truly believe she cares about me, too. I know she cares about you.”

Lexa was this close to punch his face, but instead she tightened her fists more to keep her from punching something in general.

“We’re not that close.” Lexa kept her calm.

Finn let out a deep sigh. “Okay, you know what? I’ll just bring her flowers or something. You girls love flowers, right?”

“Why are you asking me?”

“I don’t know either. I was just hoping you could say something nice about me to her.”

“I don’t know. It’s not any of my business. I’m just a student.”

“Right, right. Well, who was I kidding anyway. I knew you wouldn’t help me.”

“Can I go?” Lexa deserved all the Oscars and respect right now for keeping her cool. She was trying so hard. The idea of Finn touching Clarke in any way made her furious.

“Yes, go.”

Lexa packed her stuff and as she wanted to turn around, Finn said something almost inaudible, but loud enough for Lexa to hear it a mile away.

“I’ll just buy the bitch flowers.”

“Excuse me?” Lexa’s voice was loud and stepped closer to Finn.

“I said I’ll just buy her some flowers.”

“You named her a bitch.”

Finn laughed nervously. “No, I mean, it’s just an expression. You get it.”

“I don’t get it. Don’t talk about her like that.” She took another step closer and her fists did the tightening thing again that prevented her from punching him.

“Woah, so don’t get it. I think I finally get why you’re so sensitive about her. Your pathetic teenage hormones are crushing out on your older blonde teacher, aren’t they? I’ve been there, too, don’t worry.”

“I’m not.”

Again a nervous laugh. “I get it, Lexa. I really do. And between you and me-” He got closer and whispered it. “Her big boobs don’t make it any easier for you, does it?”

It was the moment Lexa lost all control in her body and couldn’t stop the swinging move her hands made to give him a good push so he fell to the ground.

“You don’t talk about her like that!” Lexa yelled one last time but Finn sat frozen on the floor, shocked what just happened.

As if it couldn’t be any worse, the classroom door got opened by Clarke.

She gasped loudly and immediately walked over to Lexa, palming her wrists to calm her down. Finn got up himself, almost scared.

“What happened here?” Clarke said shocked.

“Nothing, just an argument.”

“Did you slap him?” Clarke turned to Lexa.

Lexa pulled herself away from Clarke, her ears were pumping loudly from the adrenaline and angerness.

“I wish. I just pushed him to back off.”

“Lexa! This is inappropriate behavior. This isn’t good for anybody.”

“It sure felt good to me.”

“Lexa! I thought you were better than this. More mature.”

“It’s fine. It was barely even a push.” Finn said as he sat down.

“Finn, are you okay?”

“My head hurts a bit.”

“Oh, come on, you didn’t even hit your head.” Lexa protested.

“Lexa, we need to talk. I’ll get Finn something for his head.”

They walked outside and Clarke turned to Lexa angry as ever.

“What in the name of- What were you thinking?!”

“He went too far.”

“Uh, no. _You_ went too far. Pushing a teacher? Do you know what that means?”

“What? Getting expelled?”

“Yes, and getting kicked out of the team. Again, what were you thinking?!”

Lexa let out a deep sigh and sunk down to the floor, her back against the wall.

Clarke joined her on the floor, resting her and on Lexa’s knee.

“I need you to calm down and think properly. This isn’t you.”

Lexa’s ears were still pumping from anger.

“It is me.”

“No, it’s not.”

Clarke let out a sigh.

“I’m sorry Lexa. I need to report this to the school’s principal.”

Lexa only nodded. Feeling worse and worse as seconds passed by.

“I can’t believe you just did that. I get that he’s an asshole but you just can’t do this.”

Lexa only remained silent.

“Aren’t you going to say something?” Clarke raised her voice.

Lexa locked their eyes and she noticed tears forming in Clarke’s eyes.

“Fine. Don’t say anything.” Clarke wanted to walk away but Lexa didn’t want her to.

“I’m sorry.” Her voice broken and raspy.

She tried swallowing away the lump forming in her throat.

“I’m sorry.” She repeated, allowing her eyes to form tears now.

Clarke shrugged.

“You got to give me more than that.”

But Lexa couldn’t bring a single word out. So she just sat there in silence, swallowing back her tears.

“This is not the Lexa I was falling for.” Clarke’s teary eyes made Lexa nauseous.

She had seen her broken before, but this was a whole other kind of broken. A broken Lexa wasn't sure she could fix.


	27. Chapter 27

Yesterday was complete hell. After pushing her music teacher to the ground, she felt so much angriness she was glad Clarke was there to prevent her from slapping the shit out of Finn. Lexa used to have this problem more often when she was a kid. She’d punch against the wall, hurting her knuckles because of the guilt she felt on her parents car accident. She had always felt like it was her fault they died. It wasn’t until years later that she found out punching against a wall didn’t make her feel any better than alcohol did. When Clarke came into her life, she left the alcohol alone and she hadn’t had an anger problem since then.

Until yesterday. She could not hold it together anymore. Everything just went blurry for a moment when she heard Finn talk about Clarke like that. You could definitely say she was ashamed of her actions, wishing she had solved this in a less violent way. But she knew everyone would have done the same. It was only to protect Clarke.

But she hadn’t had the chance to explain to Clarke since then. After Lexa calmed down and was ready to explain herself, Clarke didn’t want to talk to her. Lexa tried texting and calling her like a million times, but she never responded. It made her feel worse and worse about what she did. Although everyone could agree Lexa was in her right to do it. Finn was a prick.

 

“Hey Clarke. This is probably like message number 20, but I’ll try again. I want to let you know that I’m sorry. Please just let me explain. Maybe you’ll understand. Please call me back.”

Lexa sighed and hung up her phone. Clarke’s voicemails were going sky high today.

She knew that on Monday she would have to explain the situation to the school’s principal. But it was important to her that she’d see Clarke first and talk to her about it.

But that almost wasn’t the case. The day went painfully slow for Lexa, waiting for any sign of Clarke until it was evening and Lexa had had enough of it. She grabbed the car and drove to Clarke’s apartment, quickly walking inside the building. She stood in front of Clarke’s door and knocked on her door. It took her a little while to finally open the door, but Clarke’s expression didn’t show any sign of happiness at all.

“Hey.” Lexa started and eyed Clarke. She was wearing black jeans and a sweater that was too large for her, but Lexa loved it. She looked so sexy in it.

“What are you doing here?”

“You didn’t call me back.”

“I know.”

“Can we talk?”

“I’m not in the mood to see you right now. Not today.” She almost closed the door but Lexa quickly reacted and stuck her foot between it.

“Let me explain. Please.”

“Finn is fine by the way. Thanks for asking.”

Lexa let out a deep sigh.

“I know he’s fine. I barely even touched him.”

Clarke raised her eyebrows. “And _that’s_ why I don’t want to talk.” She tried slamming the door in Lexa’s face again but Lexa pushed her hands against it.

“No, I’m sorry, okay? Shit, Clarke. I make one mistake and you turn your back on me?”

“That’s not it. I make mistakes, too.” 

“Then why are you doing this?”

Clarke remained silent.

“Can we talk inside? Please?”

Clarke’s breath was sharp and loud and she finally opened the door for Lexa, walking away nonchalantly. Lexa followed her.

“Clarke, listen to me. I didn’t mean to- Oh hey Octavia.” Lexa swallowed thickly when she saw Clarke’s roommate. She hadn’t noticed she was here too.

“Hey, Lexa. I think I’m gonna go.”

“Stay.” Clarke said demanding.

Lexa looked at her confused.

“Lexa, you were saying?”

“Can we talk in private?” She almost whispered it.

“Yeah, I’m going. See you later.” Octavia quickly left the building with a door slam behind her and immediately Clarke spoke.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? Huh?” Clarke stepped closer to Lexa, it was intimidating to say the least. “First you push him to the ground and he hits his head and then I hear that you called him out? What are you? Five?” Clarke scoffed and walked over to the couch to sit down.

Lexa had no idea what Clarke was talking about. Did Finn lie to her? It did sound like something Finn would do.

“I did not call him out for anything. He was calling _you_ out. It’s the whole damn reason I pushed him. And he did _not_ hit his head.” Lexa said angrily.

Clarke locked their eyes silently. Her eyebrows were still knitted together and Lexa knew she was still furious at her. She sat down next to Clarke on the couch, a respectful distance between them and her own hands locked in her lap.

“Look, I’m sorry Clarke. I really am. I let him get the best of me and I shouldn’t have. I should’ve reacted more appropriate. But one thing I didn’t do was call him out for anything.”

Clarke cleared her throat. “No, well, that makes it better. I forgive you.” Lexa got a sarcastic vibe from her.

“Really?”

“No. Not really.”

“What do you want me to say, Clarke? I wish I could go back in time and fix it. I know there’s no good excuse I pushed him but I swear I didn’t call him out.”

“You’re saying he lied to me?”

“Yes.”

“And why would he do that?”

“Obviously because he likes you. He wants you for himself.”

“And why would I believe you instead?”

Lexa let out a shaky sigh. It hurt more than she wanted it to hurt. She sadly looked down at her feet, her voice soft now.

“Because I’m your girlfriend. And I care about you. I would never want to hurt you, Clarke. I know the worst thing you could do at school is lay hands on a teacher, but I wasn’t thinking clearly. He was just saying all these things about you and I couldn’t-”

“What did he say?” Clarke’s eyes had changed. They weren’t as wide and angry anymore, rather sad and disappointed.

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It does to me. Right now I think you’re acting like a 5 year old child that hits everyone when she doesn’t get her way.” Clarke said and Lexa sighed. She almost felt awkward to tell her the things he said.

“Will you let me explain then without interrupting me?”

Clarke nodded carefully.

“First, he asked me to stay after class. I did. He wanted me to stay so I could give him some advice on asking you out because he thought you and I got along well with each other-”

“He did what now?” Clarke’s eyes wide.

“Shh. Let me talk. Basically I refused to help him and I told him that you and I weren’t that close and indirectly told him that it was inappropriate to ask me because I’m a student. I kept my cool but after a while he said something like: I’ll buy some flowers for that bitch. And that’s the moment I lost my cool. I raised my voice at him, telling him he couldn’t say things like that about you and then he thought I was jealous of his dipshit ass. I’m not, obviously. He thought I had a crush on you and that he understood because you had big boobs. So yes, I pushed him. I would push or punch anyone who talked about you like that and I just couldn’t keep my cool anymore. And I have a history of not keeping calm, it’s why I replaced punching the wall with alcohol and-”

“Woah, woah, stop. Stop talking.” Clarke rubbed her temple with her hands. “Please tell me you just made that up.”

“I wish.”

Clarke let out a desperate sigh. “Why is this happening to me?”

“I’m sorry, Clarke.”

Clarke locked their eyes as she cupped her cheeks. She gave her a sad smile and Lexa mirrored it.

“I appreciate you standing up for me, but you shouldn’t have-”

“Pushed him. I know. I’m not proud of it.” Lexa finished Clarke’s sentence. Clarke nodded and gave her another sad grin.

“You should have hit him harder, I mean.” Clarke’s lip curled up in a tiny smile and it made Lexa feel so much better.

“I know.” Lexa agreed. It seemed like Clarke came into a little more reason, because she calmed down. The hate in her eyes when she eyed Lexa was gone now.

“It’s all such a mess.” She said as she let go of Lexa and grabbed herself a drink.

“You know what? This is my problem, not yours. I’ll handle it. If they suspend me, that’s all there is. It’s my responsibility.”

Clarke sat down again next to her and handed her a drink as well. Lexa looked funny at it.

“Don’t worry, it’s alcohol free.” Clarke explained.

Lexa nodded thankfully. “I promise this won’t be your problem. I know you can defend yourself around Finn and other people. I just hate the way he talks about you without any respect.”

Clarke reached for her arm, caressing it gently.

“I know. Thank you. I just don’t want to have one of those aggressive girlfriends.”

Lexa nodded. “A few years ago, I would’ve been that girlfriend.”

“A few years ago, our relationship would be illegal.” Clarke joked and took a sip of her drink.

“That’s true.”

“Was it after your parents died? When you started hitting the wall you said?” Clarke asked carefully.

Lexa nodded. “How did you guess?”

“I might know you a little by now. Besides, I wanted to hurt myself too after my dad died.”

“You did?”

“Yes. Instead I started drinking. But you already know that story.”

Lexa let out a relieved sigh and nodded. Clarke understood her, and yet she never thought Clarke would go this easy on her after what she did. It reminded her of how lucky she was that Clarke was hers. And she would do anything to keep it that way.

Lexa grabbed her hand, intertwining their fingers.

“Thank you for listening to me.” Lexa spoke gently.

Clarke grinned. “Yeah. I didn’t think you had a good reason to do what you did. Although, never do that again. I will kill you if you hit someone again.” It came out jokingly, but somehow Lexa knew she kind of meant it. So she just laughed.

“I’m sorry about today. I just was so furious at you, I couldn’t even look at you.” Clarke continued.

“Yeah, just tell me next time instead of ignoring me, please. I hate when we fight.”

Clarke reached for her hand again, placing it on top of hers.

“Me too. I just hope they believe you when you tell the principal what happened. I’m sorry I doubted you. You’re my girl. Of course I believe you.” Clarke gave her hand a gentle squeeze and Lexa’s chest warmed up by her words. The way her gentle words could make all the bad disappear in the world amazed Lexa still.

“Thank you. I hope so, too.”

“We’ll see on Monday what happens with you. You want me to be there with you and the principal?”

“No, thank you though. This is my problem. You think I should tell him what Finn told me about you?”

“I think you should. No teacher should ask their student things like this.”

“Yeah. So what about you? You never asked me out on a date? You never kissed me when I was your student?” Lexa said playful to lighten up the mood.

“I’m sorry, are you complaining?” Clarke joked back, an eyebrow raised.

Lexa laughed and scooted closer to Clarke, a few inches away from each other.

“Would you punish me if I did?”

“You want to find out?” Clarke leaned in, her hot breath against Lexa’s lips as Lexa finally got to taste her sweet, gentle lips against hers.

 

\----

 

“He claimed you called him out for ‘asshole’ and ‘musicjunk’. But you’re saying he called Mrs. Griffin out for ‘bitch’?”

Lexa could barely keep herself together. Musicjunk wasn’t even a bad word.

“I did not call him out. He called Mrs. Griffin out and it got me upset because no woman should be treated like that, so disrespectful. I wouldn’t feel safe in such an environment and I believe I’m not the only female student who feels that way.”

Lexa tried making Finn look like the bad guy in here and you could say she was doing a pretty great job till now.

“We will definitely look into that because I think that you’re right. But just know it’s his word against yours.”

Lexa nodded understandably. So much for doing a pretty great job. They would believe a teacher rather than a student of course.

“Thank you for that. I know there’s no way I could make this up to you or Mr. Collins. I already apologized to him this morning but I know it’s not enough. I will be responsible enough to face the consequences of my actions.”

The principal let out a low chuckle.

“You’ve always had such a smooth mouth, you’re just like your father.”

Lexa swallowed loudly. The words made her feel a little nauseous.

“I like you, Lexa. I really do, but I’m still going to let you be suspended, I’m sorry.”

“I understand.”

“I won’t make any decisions on your baseball team whether you can stay or not. I’ll let Mr. Pike decide that.”

Lexa nodded, she felt a little more relieved right now. She just had to convince Mr. Pike to let her stay.

“Thank you.”

“You may go. See you in a week.”

 

\----

 

“You’re out.”

“What? Why?” Lexa’s eyes were wide, trying to process it.

Pike let out a laughter that scared Lexa, it sounded intimidating.

“Really? Why? You know why. You pushed a teacher. That’s unacceptable which means getting suspended _and_ getting kicked out of the team.”

“Mr. Pike, please. I’ve worked so hard to stay on the team. I even took stupid music lessons, which I passed by the way.”

“And then you hit the teacher. Bummer.”

He grabbed his bag and walked out of the room but Lexa followed him.

“Wait! Give me one more chance.”

Pike turned around, sighing deeply.

“Another one? How many do you need, Lexa? I’m sorry, you’re out.”

“Okay, yes, I’ve made a mistake. But you know my history better than any other teacher at this school.”

“So you want me to feel sorry for you because you lost your parents?”

“What? No, that’s not what I meant at all. Jesus. I’m just-” Lexa took a deep breath and her voice was low. “Baseball saved my life. It was because of you and because of baseball that I never became a junkie living on the streets. Come on, Mr. Pike. I’ll lose everything I love if I can’t stay on the team. I’ll never be able to go to college this way.”

Pike stared at her deeply, his eyes narrowed.

“I’m not doing this to hurt you, Lexa. You just need to understand that enough is enough. You laid hands on a teacher for God’s sake. I won’t allow those kind of people on my team.”

Lexa really felt the last part of his sentence. ‘Those kind of people’. She was one of those people. She swallowed back to lump growing in her throat.

“I have to go. Promise me you won’t do anything stupid.”

Lexa only nodded sadly. This time there was no way she could talk herself out of it.

 

\----

 

“I’m sorry, baby. You’ll be okay though. You still don’t want me to try and talk some sense into Pike?”

Lexa shook her head that was nuzzled into Clarke’s neck. They were at Lexa’s place because her mom wasn’t at home and she didn’t feel like coming out of the house today. Her mom was more than pissed when she heard about what Lexa did.

“No, thanks. I’ll be fine. I don’t want to give you a bad name or draw attention to us both. It’ll be just a week of homework and essays. And no baseball, for good.” Lexa shrugged.

Clarke brushed her lips over her forehead before kissing it.

“I’m here for you.”

Lexa nodded and nuzzled her nose to Clarke’s neck. Clarke brushed her hair with her fingers, which was comforting.

“Did I tell you Finn gave me flowers today?”

Lexa clenched her teeth. That was the last thing she wanted to hear right now.

“No, but he said he would as you know.”

“Yeah, and then he asked me out like you said he would. But I said no of course, and when he asked me why, I confronted him with his own words: Because he was disrespectful to me. He never admitted though for calling me out.”

Lexa rolled her eyes.

“Typical Finn.”

“Yeah. I think he almost cried when I rejected him, because he rushed to the bathroom after.”

Lexa grinned a little.

“But what I mean is that I believe you, Lexa. I trust you. I’m sorry if I didn’t make that clear before. I’m proud of the way you’re handling this. You’re taking responsibility for it as you should.”

“Yeah, of course.” Lexa confirmed.

“I want to tell you something. Because I have given you some insecurities lately. You know, the whole trust and communication part. I want you to know that I’m a 100% behind this relationship and I trust you. Just don’t hurt people please.”

Lexa chuckled lightly and kissed Clarke’s temple. She couldn’t begin to explain how great those words sounded.

“I won’t.”

“I decided I’m going back to LA for the weekend. I’m going to meet up with the other people who went through the same thing as me and we’re going to report them to the police and make a plan.”

Lexa swallowed loudly. That definitely came as a surprise. She didn’t really feel at ease when Clarke would travel alone. It made her feel powerless in case something would happen to her like last time.

“Oh, okay. That’s good, right?”

“I hope so.”

“So you’re gonna make me miss you this weekend already, huh?”

Clarke brushed a finger against Lexa’s cheek and smiled.

“I was actually hoping you’d come with me this weekend. You know, to keep me company and I think it would be good to you too. You know, get your mind off this situation.”

Lexa tilt her head and locked their eyes.

“Really?”

Clarke chuckled, still brushing her hair.

“Really. If you want, of course.”

“Are you kidding me? Of course I want to. I’ll tell my mom I’m staying at Anya’s.”

“Right.”

“This is great. I’m so down for a weekend with only you. No hiding our relationship.”

Clarke nodded sadly.

“Me too. Hopefully I can make you think of something else this weekend than school. But I think I could.” Clarke said playful, a wide grin on her face.

“Oh, really? What makes you think that?” Lexa said back playful, leaning in to Clarke.

“Because I’m going to suck your dick so good, you’ll only think about me for the next week.” She whispered.

Lexa almost choked in her drink. The thought of Clarke’s mouth taking her could make her cum right on the spot.

“Cocky much?” Lexa smiled.

“Don’t believe me?”

Lexa quickly pecked their lips and let go with a wet smack.

“I guess we’ll see this weekend.”

Clarke chuckled.

“Okay. I wanted to do it now, but if you really insist on this weekend-”

Lexa’s eyes widened.

“No, no, I thought- I’m- You meant-”

Clarke let out a genuine laugh and kissed Lexa’s jaw.

“You’re cute. But your mom could be home any minute now so I’m leaving. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Lexa pouted which made Clarke melt into her and gave her a longing, desperate kiss before leaving.

This week was going to be terrible and difficult without her friends at school. But she had Clarke. She had Clarke supporting her and wanting to be with her the whole weekend. It’s all she wanted. She had something to look out to after this week at home, being suspended.

 


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! I got so many hate towards Clarke last chapter and that was the last thing I wanted for her so hopefully she made it up to you... Enjoy!

_“My hero.”_

“Hi… You’re not Clarke.”

The other end of the phone started laughing, it was a guy’s voice Lexa was sure she had heard somewhere before. She just didn’t expect someone else to pick up Clarke’s phone, especially not a guy.

_“No, Clarke’s showering. This is Lincoln. Octavia asked me to pick up Clarke’s phone.”_

Lexa sighed relieved.

“Oh hey Lincoln. How are you?”

_“I’m great now that I hear you’re going away for the weekend with Clarke. Man, you’re really living the dream.”_

Lexa shook her head, laughing. She really liked the guy, but she wished he didn’t look at them like they were teacher and student. Well, they were, but Lexa didn’t look at Clarke like that anymore. Not since they started actually dating. She just looked at her like her girlfriend and that was it.

“Yeah, I’m excited to be alone with Clarke.”

_“I’m sure you are. And thanks to you Octavia and I have the place for ourselves this weekend.”_

Lexa chuckled. “You’re welcome. I just gave you and me a happy ending weekend.”

_Lincoln laughed loudly. “You’re okay Lexa Woods, you know that?”_

Lexa frowned, smiling. Why did he have so much energy?

“Hey listen, if Clarke gets out of the shower, ask her to call me back alright?”

_“Will do. And hey, the four of us should get together sometime. Hangout with food and drinks.”_

“Sounds great. I’m in.”

_“Great. Oh, I think Clarke just got out of the shower, hold on.”_

Before Lexa could say anything else, she heard Lincoln shout something to Clarke until they were shouting back and forth to each other. After a minute, she heard her voice on the other end of the phone.

 _“Hey babe, what’s up?”_ Clarke said quickly out of breath.

“Hey, you sound rushed.”

_“Yeah Lincoln said it was urgent but I’m guessing it’s not?”_

Lexa let out a laugh. “Well, not really. I’m just calling to let you know my mom works a little longer today, she just texted me. She’ll be home at 9 so I was thinking maybe you wanted to come over?”

Clarke let out a relieved sigh. _“Fucking Lincoln. I thought something had happened to you.”_

“No, don’t worry.” Lexa softly smiled, her heart fluttered at the words.

_“Okay, yeah, let me just get dressed and stuff. I’ll be there in a bit.”_

“You know, you don’t necessarily need to get dressed…”

_“I’m not gonna walk to my car naked.”_

“I’m just saying-”

 _“I’ll be there in a bit.”_ Clarke laughed and hung up the phone.

**\----**

“I’m gonna die of boredom one of these days.” Lexa sighed out and slammed her head on the table.

“Ow, don’t hit your head like that.” Lexa felt a soft hand on the back of her head, a thumb rubbing down her neck soothingly and it send a nice shiver down her spine.

“I get that it’s tough right now, you don’t deserve this. Finn should be the one getting fired.” The older blonde said.

“I agree.” Her muffled voice sounded before tilting her head to face the blonde’s worrying eyes, still caressing her neck.

“So, how’s Finn acting this week to you?”

Clarke shrugged.

“Like himself.”

“Did he say anything about what happened?”

“He’s acting like a goddamn victim. I can’t stand it. He wants all of us to feel sorry for him and most of us do.”

Lexa nodded understandably, worried Clarke actually felt for him.

“Do _you_?”

Clarke furrowed her brows. “God no. Absolutely not. I know he’s putting up an act.”

Lexa nodded, feeling relieved Clarke got her back. But looking at her, Clarke’s eyes were still worried and Lexa couldn’t quite figure out why.

“What’s troubling you then?”

Clarke pressed a sad smile to her lips.

“Nothing.”

“Clarke…”

“Really, it’s nothing.”

“Talk to me-”

“I just… miss you at school.” Clarke said softly.

Lexa smiled. “Me too. Hopefully we can overhaul this lack of seeing each other this weekend.” She said smiling, an eyebrow raised and Clarke knew immediately what she meant.

“Oh I’m sure we will.” Clarke said as she suddenly got up to pack her bag. “I should go though, your mom will be here soon, right?”

Lexa let out a low sigh and pouted. “Yeah. I wish you could just stay.”

Clarke nodded, wrapping her arms around Lexa’s neck as she stood up.

“Me too. But I’ll see you tomorrow again. You have one day to go before freedom. You excited?”

Lexa placed her hands on Clarke’s hips and nodded.

“I can’t wait.”

“Good, me neither. What did you tell your mom?”

“That I’m staying at Anya’s. I will have to inform Anya too about that.” She said and Clarke nodded understandably.

“Alright. Text me tomorrow when you wake up, will you?”

Lexa nodded. They always did when they woke up every morning, she knew Clarke didn’t need to ask her to do so. Waking up to Clarke’s good morning texts or voice was a great way to start the day.

“Of course. Goodnight.”

Lexa pulled Clarke in for a goodnight kiss, wrapping her tight in her arms before Clarke left the house.

 

**\----**

“So, what are you _actually_ doing this weekend?” Anya asked after taking another bite of her chocolate bar.

Lexa had thought about this. She had thought about coming up for an excuse to her friends. Well, she had to. But she couldn’t come up with anything too crazy, they were her best friends after all. They knew everything about each other and Lexa didn’t have it in her to lie too much to her best friend.

“I’m leaving town for two days.”

Anya snorted. “Yeah, I got that. But why? With who?”

“Just a friend.”

Anya laughed mockingly.

“Just a friend. Which one? I know all of your friends.”

“You don’t know her.”

Anya suddenly gasped.

“So it’s a _girl_. Are you in love?”

“What? No, get off my back.” Lexa rushed out and bit her lip.

“I fucking knew it. It’s your new lover, isn’t it? Why can’t you just tell me who it is?”

“No.”

“I won’t take that for an answer.”

“You have no choice.”

“Oh come on. Give me something. What’s her name?”

“Nameless.” Lexa said dry.

“Such a pretty name. Does she live out of town?”

“No.”

“Oh, so she lives _here_.”

Lexa bit her lip again. She already said too much. Anya always had that effect on her.

“No…”

“Is she hot?”

Lexa smiled, looking down almost shyly to her feet without answering her.

“Oh my god she is. Is she your girlfriend? Screw you for not telling me more. Why can’t you tell me?”

“She will kick my butt.” It was all Lexa said, knowing it was partly true but that wasn’t the main reason she didn’t want to tell her. It could end both of their careers. “I promise to tell you one day. If we get more serious.” Lexa already thought they were serious, but Anya didn’t need to know right now.

“Come on, I always tell you everything.”

“So do I. I really hope I can introduce her to you one day soon. Right now, we just can’t. We’re not going public at all.”

Poor Anya not knowing they had already met. Anya rolled her eyes and leaned back to the couch defeated. “You’d better explain to me why.”

“I promise I will.”

“Good. ‘Cause you owe me for lying to your mom this weekend.”

Lexa smiled, supportively and gently hitting Anya’s shoulder.

“Thanks for helping me out.”

“Yeah well, you would have done the same for me. In fact, you already did that multiple times.” She shrugged.

“Those were the good times.” Lexa laughed.

“Oh, yeah. So eh, did you already did the do? With your mysterious girl? Or are you planning on doing it this weekend?”

Lexa felt her cheeks burn a little red. Funny, she never felt embarrassed talking about this. She figured it was just different with Clarke. She cared about her. A lot.

“Obviously.”

“Done it?”

“Yeah.”

“Nice, Woods. I wouldn’t have expected anything else from you though.”

“Well, it’s different this time.”

“Because you love her?” Anya repeated.

“I don’t _love_ her.” Lexa rolled her eyes, but it cost her saying that out loud more than she thought it would and she didn’t know exactly why. “I just really care about her. It’s way better than the meaningless sex I've been having these last few years.”

“Who are you?” Anya joked and Lexa felt a little uncomfortable. She wanted to get rid of her old reputation. She had a girlfriend now and she liked Clarke more than words could ever describe.

“I’m still me.”

Anya chuckled and nodded.

“I know, don’t worry Woods. But it’s nice, isn’t it? Having a girl you actually care about?”

Lexa smiled and took a sip of her soda before turning to Anya again. The thought of being with Clarke made her chest warm and her heart feel at ease. She sure was lucky to have her. And to be alone with her for the weekend was all she could ever ask for. She needed this time alone with Clarke at a place where nobody knew who they were. A place where she could just grab Clarke’s hand and kiss her in public. No more hiding.

**\----**

 

“Tooth brush?”

“Check.”

“Hair brush?”

“Got it.”

“Passport?”

“Obviously.”

“Lingerie?”

“Why would I…” Clarke sighed out embarrassedly. “Fine. Got that too.” She admitted.

Octavia had been helping her with her last things to pack before her weekend in LA with Lexa. She was thrilled to take Lexa out of town, being alone with her. She needed to be alone with her. It would help her go back to the very core of their relationship and remember why she started all this. She wanted this relationship more than anyone else, but a lot of things were going on in her life right now and she needed to just take a break from it. And what could be better than getting out of town and enjoy the weekend with her favorite person on earth? And the best part was that nobody knew who they were in LA. They didn’t have to hide their relationship there.

Clarke packed a few more stuff before saying goodbye to Octavia and rushed to the airport to meet Lexa there.

She walked in and looked around. She stopped searching when she saw a girl standing with an inviting pose, a pose she would recognize miles away. Clarke smiled and walked up to her.

“Hey there.”

“Hey.” Lexa smiled wide when she saw her but she still remained slightly distant. Who knew if somebody they knew would be here right now? Just a few more hours before they didn’t have to worry about that anymore.

“Ready?” Clarke breathed.

“Ready.” Lexa nodded once.

Clarke noticed the slight shaky trembling in Lexa’s voice and she figured she was nervous for this weekend. She understood, it was a big deal to Lexa. She had never travelled alone so far.

They walked to the gate and got in the airplane, but Clarke couldn’t help but notice Lexa was still nervous. Lexa hadn’t said another word to her all this time. It was almost worrying.

As they sat down in their seats next to each other, Clarke reached for her hand, lacing their fingers together. It made Lexa turn her head around, locking their eyes and Clarke gently squeezed her hand.

“You okay?” She finally asked.

Lexa cleared her throat and only nodded before turning her head around again.

“Lexa.” Clarke squeezed her hand again. “Look at me. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” Lexa did as she was told and locked their eyes. Her beautiful green eyes with a slight worried expression in them.

Clarke tilted her head and raised an eyebrow. “That’s more than what you said to me in the whole day. Talk to me.”

Lexa let out a sigh and when the stewardess started talking about getting off in five minutes from this moment, Lexa unconsciously squeezed her hand hard as she could and finally Clarke understood.

“You’re scared of flying.” She said confirming herself.

Lexa looked at her, almost burning a hole through her with her wide, staring eyes.

“I’m fine.”

“You’re scared.”

“No…”

“Oh my god. Baby.” Clarke leaned in and whispered close to her ear before placing a kiss on her cheek for support. She felt bad for Lexa, but it was also kind of adorable how this tough girl next to her suddenly melted into a puddle into her.

“I don’t love it, you know, love is a very strong word. Flying and love should never go together in the same sentence except for if there is a ‘not’ in it, too, and it’s totally fine because it’s just a plane and millions of people get on them every single day and most of the times nothing happens, except for when something _does_ happen and-”

“Stop rambling.” Clarke chuckled and brought their hands to her lips, kissing Lexa’s hand. “It’s going to be fine. I’m right here holding your hand, okay? We will get safe to LA.”

Lexa let out a nervous chuckle. “Okay…”

“I had no idea you hated flying so much.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t hate it, I strongly dislike it.” Lexa tried, still trying not to look like a total coward in front of Clarke but Clarke knew her so well.

Clarke let out a laugh and kissed Lexa’s hand again.

“You don’t always have to act tough around me, you know? You’re adorable either way.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and it was the first time she slightly chuckled a bit. Clarke felt her relax a little as she settled comfortably in her seat, as close to Clarke as possible and Clarke breathed out contently. It made Clarke’s feelings for her even stronger knowing Lexa was more sensitive than she looked. She absolutely loved these two different sides of Lexa. It was what she liked about her since the very beginning.

As soon as the plane got off, Clarke’s hand was close of being crushed by how hard Lexa was squeezing but she didn’t mind that much. As long as it made Lexa feel better about flying she didn’t have a problem with it. She cared about her, a lot. Even though she knew she maybe hadn’t made that clear to her this week, she hoped she could make it up to her by telling her what she did for her at school. Hopefully she could surprise Lexa with it.

When the plane finally landed safely to the ground, Lexa was the first one to sigh out of relieve. Suddenly she looked around her before leaning to Clarke’s ear and whispered.”

“Should we clap or something?”

Clarke let out a spontaneous laughter. “No, no. Never clap.”

Lexa looked surprised. “Not even when you’re happy you got to the ground safely?”

Clarke continued laughing. “Not even then.”

Clarke never understood why people clapped when a plane landed, but the fact that Lexa wanted to do it made it somehow extremely cute.

“Oh, okay. Well, I do need to show my happiness to someone.” She raised an eyebrow playfully.

“Hmm I like that. I’ll be more than happy to help back at the hotel.” Clarke teased back and before she knew it, Lexa’s lips were already on hers, kissing her teasingly. She enjoyed the short, intimate moment before they packed their suitcases and left off to the hotel in a taxi.

Finally at the hotel, the first thing they did was throw themselves on the bed and let out a loud sigh.

“This is great.” Clarke said tiredly.

Then Lexa turned around and settled on top of Clarke, her head resting on her chest.

“I agree.” Lexa sighed out, placing a kiss on Clarke’s chest.

They laid there comfortably for another ten minutes when Clarke spoke.

“I’ve got some good news. Want to hear it?”

“Wow that was random, but yeah, sure.”

Clarke urged Lexa to sit up straight as she reached for her hand, playing with her fingers and smiled, looking down.

“You alright?” Lexa asked carefully.

Clarke nodded.

“I am. I’ve been doing some deep thinking this week about us.”

Suddenly Lexa’s face went pale and she swallowed loudly, but Clarke comforted her.

“Nothing bad, Lexa.” Clarke immediately said, squeezing her hand. “I just regret how I didn’t support you enough a week ago when the thing with Finn happened.”

“Clarke…”

“No, let me talk. I should’ve acted more reasonable. I stand behind you, Lexa. Always. Even though I don’t approve violence at school, it wouldn’t have troubled me so much if it happened outside of school. I mean, every person that comes up for me like that, deserves to be validated and deserves my respect.”

Lexa only stared at her, listening to her words.

“I couldn’t stand how Finn wasn’t getting any consequences for his actions, so I went to talk to the school’s principal and I backed your story up. Something I should’ve done way earlier.”

Lexa’s eyes were wider now, staring right through Clarke’s eyes.

“That could end your career.” She said softly.

“And Finn’s.”

“And yours.”

They hadn’t talked about the ‘accident’ since it happened and she knew Lexa hated how she disappointed Clarke. But she didn’t disappoint her at all.

“Maybe so.”

“What did you say? What did he say?”

“The same thing you did. And then he said he would have a word with Finn which was yesterday, but I don’t know how it ended. Oh, and I went to talk to your coach as well, and I may or may not have arranged you can get back to your team.”

“You did _what now?!_ ” Lexa jumped up.

Clarke nodded. “ _Only_ if you get all your grades up, that was the only thing he wanted back from you.”

“Oh my god, Clarke, you’re absolutely the best. I could just- kiss you.” Lexa said happily and pulled Clarke to her own lips, giving her sloppy, hard kisses, when Clarke pulled back. It did her so good to see her this happy again. Especially since she was the reason she was smiling.

“I know I should’ve done that way earlier but I just didn’t know if I had the power and I was still kind of angry at you.”

“Clarke, it’s totally fine. I know I disappointed you.”

“But you didn’t. Like I said, I did a lot of thinking and the truth is, you did not disappoint me. You stepped up for me, how should that disappoint me?”

Lexa smiled wide as ever and Clarke couldn’t think of another beautiful sight right now. Her beautiful joyful smile and the way her eyes would lit up every single time was why she loved… Was why she was Lexa.

 


End file.
